1
00:00:48,448 --> 00:00:50,817
[students chattering]

2
00:01:04,497 --> 00:01:06,166
- Hey.
- Hey.

3
00:01:46,873 --> 00:01:48,740
Yes.

4
00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:53,413
[horse whinnies]

5
00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:55,482
[college president]
My mandate is to restore

6
00:01:55,648 --> 00:01:59,586
some semblance of fiscal sanity
to this institution.

7
00:02:00,987 --> 00:02:02,989
And if we"re all
honest with each other,

8
00:02:03,156 --> 00:02:04,991
we know that for a long time,

9
00:02:05,191 --> 00:02:09,796
this festival has been
a costly exercise in nostalgia.

10
00:02:09,996 --> 00:02:13,933
So if Professors Cleary and
Wasserman deign to show up,

11
00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:15,502
then you can pass this along.

12
00:02:15,669 --> 00:02:16,936
[door opens]

13
00:02:17,837 --> 00:02:19,105
Sorry I"m late.

14
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,241
Horse trouble.

15
00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:25,912
[college president]
Dr. Wasserman,

16
00:02:25,945 --> 00:02:27,781
I"ve decided that the university

17
00:02:27,947 --> 00:02:29,783
must immediately
withdraw its support

18
00:02:29,949 --> 00:02:31,418
for the Annual
Literary Festival.

19
00:02:31,618 --> 00:02:34,540
I know you"re all disappointed.

20
00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:35,822
But let"s be
honest with ourselves.

21
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:39,492
We can"t even attract
a writer with enough stature

22
00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:42,262
to inspire
even modest attendance.

23
00:02:42,429 --> 00:02:45,498
I remember when all the
great ones used to come here.

24
00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:46,700
Updike.

25
00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:49,102
[laughs]
That was a banner year.

26
00:02:49,269 --> 00:02:51,104
We... We should invite him.

27
00:02:51,271 --> 00:02:52,839
He"s dead, Arthur.

28
00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:54,874
[Arthur]
Oh, That"s sad.

29
00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:58,945
[panting] Wait, where are you going?
Wait, wait, wait.

30
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:00,413
[Wasserman] You"re too late.

31
00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:03,350
The axe has fallen on
our literary enterprise,

32
00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:07,200
and before you stands the grim
figure of the executioner.

33
00:03:07,220 --> 00:03:10,423
Oh, so you"re willing to give up
the literary event of the decade.

34
00:03:10,590 --> 00:03:12,826
I"m sorry, Professor.
I"ve made my decision.

35
00:03:12,992 --> 00:03:16,830
Really? So what if I told you that the
man who is coming to this year"s festival

36
00:03:16,996 --> 00:03:19,599
will put us back
on the literary map?

37
00:03:19,799 --> 00:03:21,568
I can"t imagine
who that might be.

38
00:03:21,735 --> 00:03:24,437
Excuse me, isn"t that sort of your job?
I just...

39
00:03:24,604 --> 00:03:27,574
[Wasserman]
Okay, Simone, who is it?

40
00:03:29,909 --> 00:03:32,746
Who"s the writer that went MIA,

41
00:03:32,912 --> 00:03:39,119
vanished, for 20 years after the
publication of his masterpiece?

42
00:03:39,285 --> 00:03:42,550
J.D. Salinger. It"s Salinger!

43
00:03:42,255 --> 00:03:43,256
Dead, Arthur.

44
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:45,558
Shriver.

45
00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:46,626
Shriver.

46
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:48,280
Shriver?

47
00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:50,163
Shriver?
I thought he was dead.

48
00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,643
Shriver,
it"s the goddamn toilet again.

49
00:04:13,787 --> 00:04:15,550
Can you hurry up?

50
00:04:15,221 --> 00:04:16,923
I"m about to
miss my window here.

51
00:04:57,864 --> 00:04:58,932
[meows]

52
00:05:28,128 --> 00:05:29,529
[Shriver] I got this letter.

53
00:05:30,797 --> 00:05:31,998
You got a letter?

54
00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,100
Now, are you in trouble?

55
00:05:37,671 --> 00:05:40,140
"Dear, Mr. Shriver,
it is my pleasure

56
00:05:40,306 --> 00:05:43,843
on behalf of the festival
committee of Acheron University

57
00:05:44,100 --> 00:05:48,314
to invite you to participate in
our literary festival this year."

58
00:05:48,481 --> 00:05:51,584
Invite... Wait a minute,
you to participate?

59
00:05:52,419 --> 00:05:53,620
"As your work..."

60
00:05:53,787 --> 00:05:57,230
[laughing]
"your work is controversial."

61
00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:59,192
- What do they mean?
- I don"t... I don"t know.

62
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:02,595
I... I think they think I"m someone else.
I don"t know.

63
00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:06,332
"The theme of which is Truths,
Fictions and Alternative Facts.

64
00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:11,271
It "s al... It"s also, auspiciously,
the 20th anniversary

65
00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:14,741
of the publication
of your masterpiece,

66
00:06:15,775 --> 00:06:16,776
Goat Time.

67
00:06:18,110 --> 00:06:19,779
We are also pleased to award you

68
00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:24,500
this year"s Acher... Acheron
Prize for Literary Achievement.

69
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:27,387
Sincerely,
Professor Simone Cleary."

70
00:06:31,910 --> 00:06:33,793
[Shriver] Goat Time.
What kind of title is that?

71
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,296
- You don"t know Goat Time?
- No, I don"t know Goat Time.

72
00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:39,532
I mean, like,
everybody read Goat Time, man.

73
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,501
That lady, she read Goat Time.

74
00:06:41,668 --> 00:06:43,737
This dude...
Hey, did you read Goat Time?

75
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:45,105
Goat Time?

76
00:06:46,390 --> 00:06:47,607
What"s it about?

77
00:06:47,774 --> 00:06:49,409
What? Goat Time.

78
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:51,440
I don"t know.
I didn"t read it.

79
00:06:55,248 --> 00:06:56,649
[Shriver]
Someone"s messing with me.

80
00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:57,784
Yeah?

81
00:06:58,952 --> 00:07:00,754
Maybe it"s one of
my ex-wife"s friends.

82
00:07:01,488 --> 00:07:03,656
- Maybe.
- Nah.

83
00:07:03,823 --> 00:07:06,559
Look, I know how to settle this.

84
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,229
- [server] Are you finished?
- Oh, hey, yeah. How are you? Yeah.

85
00:07:09,295 --> 00:07:10,296
Thank you.

86
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:14,534
One way
to get to the bottom of this...

87
00:07:15,502 --> 00:07:18,538
"Dear Mrs..."

88
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:22,375
No, that don"t sound good.

89
00:07:22,542 --> 00:07:25,845
"Dear... Professor."

90
00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:27,313
Right? Right?

91
00:07:27,947 --> 00:07:29,416
No, no, no, no, no.

92
00:07:30,830 --> 00:07:33,987
"Dear Dr. Clearly,

93
00:07:34,854 --> 00:07:36,220
it would be..."

94
00:07:36,222 --> 00:07:37,524
[Simone]
"my pleasure to attend

95
00:07:37,691 --> 00:07:40,727
your most esteemed
and prestigious festival

96
00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:44,130
and to address the issues of Truths,
Fictions and Alternative Facts,

97
00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,733
which is totally my thing.

98
00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:50,103
Uh, In fact, I was carrying on
to my good friend, Lenny,

99
00:07:50,270 --> 00:07:53,673
about that aforementioned
subject just this morning.

100
00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:56,843
Also, is the prize a car?
[chuckles]

101
00:07:57,977 --> 00:08:00,146
Just wondering because..."

102
00:08:02,115 --> 00:08:03,283
Okay.

103
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:08,188
Well, he goes on
about the car and, uh...

104
00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:09,889
[chuckling]

105
00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:16,896
We"re all very familiar with
Mr. Shriver"s subversive sense of humor.

106
00:08:17,630 --> 00:08:21,670
You know, I recall reading
an article about Shriver

107
00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:24,604
several years ago in a... in a
journal... I can"t remember which one.

108
00:08:24,771 --> 00:08:26,539
It was The Journal of
Comparative Linguistics.

109
00:08:26,706 --> 00:08:28,441
It doesn"t really matter.

110
00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:31,745
But the article was making an
interesting point of comparison

111
00:08:31,911 --> 00:08:33,646
between... I wrote the article.

112
00:08:33,813 --> 00:08:36,249
Shriver"s Goat Time
and James Joyce"s Ulysses.

113
00:08:36,449 --> 00:08:38,510
Now... I wrote the ****ing article, T.

114
00:08:38,218 --> 00:08:39,753
Oh, really?

115
00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:42,255
I still don"t think
that this is a very good idea.

116
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:44,591
Yeah, he sounds like a lunatic.

117
00:08:44,758 --> 00:08:47,227
[sighs]
And this the world calls frenzy.

118
00:08:47,394 --> 00:08:50,497
But the wise
have a far deeper madness,

119
00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:54,634
and the glance of melancholy
is a fearful gift.

120
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,703
Byron, right?

121
00:08:56,903 --> 00:08:58,710
[Simone] Let"s give up.

122
00:08:58,238 --> 00:09:00,974
Just keep churning out
worthless degrees

123
00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:03,343
to anyone
who will pay the tuition.

124
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:06,479
One year, I...
I invited Philip Roth.

125
00:09:06,646 --> 00:09:07,647
Fine.

126
00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:09,983
But this is on you, Simone.

127
00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:13,687
Bring Shriver and bring a crowd,

128
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:17,223
because this is the last
chance for this festival.

129
00:09:18,658 --> 00:09:20,126
He never wrote back.

130
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,397
[Simone] Dear Mr. Shriver,

131
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,399
I can"t tell you
how delighted we all are

132
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,535
that you"ve accepted
our invitation.

133
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:31,404
Write her back. - Tell her I"m not coming.
- You write her back.

134
00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:33,540
I"m not a writer.

135
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:35,809
[Simone] It"s so hard
to keep these festivals alive,

136
00:09:35,975 --> 00:09:37,811
so your response
has lifted our spirits.

137
00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:39,546
[Lenny]
Everyone"s a writer these days.

138
00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:41,848
When was the last time
you went to Starbucks?

139
00:09:42,150 --> 00:09:44,984
[Simone] On behalf of lovers of
literature everywhere, I thank you.

140
00:09:45,151 --> 00:09:47,420
And I hope
this is not too forward of me,

141
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,389
but it would be wonderful
if you could perhaps

142
00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:51,591
share a piece
of new writing with us.

143
00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:54,270
[Shriver] I don"t write.[Lenny]
Most writers don"t write.

144
00:09:54,940 --> 00:09:56,290
All they do is complain
about not writing,

145
00:09:56,229 --> 00:09:57,864
then they write about
not writing.

146
00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:01,835
And they"re depressed.
You"re always depressed.

147
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,987
[liquid pattering]

148
00:10:29,329 --> 00:10:32,332
[imaginary Shriver] Looks like we"re
having a crisis of inspiration.

149
00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:34,300
Mmm.

150
00:10:36,870 --> 00:10:39,439
Oh, I know,
it "s that you" re a drunk

151
00:10:40,607 --> 00:10:42,750
and an impostor.

152
00:10:46,946 --> 00:10:49,449
You just happen to share
a name with the writer.

153
00:10:50,817 --> 00:10:52,218
The arrogance.

154
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,255
They asked me
to write something.

155
00:10:55,889 --> 00:10:56,956
It"s ridiculous.

156
00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:58,658
Put down the pencil,

157
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,261
have a drink.

158
00:11:14,741 --> 00:11:18,111
[cracking, rumbling]

159
00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:28,121
[narrator] The watermark
appeared on my ceiling

160
00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:31,224
on the rainy day
my wife walked out on me.

161
00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:40,533
At first it was just a spot,

162
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,836
approximately the size
of a quarter,

163
00:11:43,300 --> 00:11:46,106
directly above the bed
where I lay weeping.

164
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,141
[rain pattering] Listening
to the rain fall,

165
00:11:48,308 --> 00:11:49,976
I watched the watermark grow

166
00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:52,512
ever so slowly to the size of...
[trailing off]

167
00:12:15,669 --> 00:12:17,671
[pilot] Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Salt Lake City.

168
00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:20,740
Those with connecting flights
to Acheron proceed to gate 17.

169
00:12:21,841 --> 00:12:22,842
Sorry.

170
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:26,312
Oh, my God! Sorry, honey.

171
00:12:27,130 --> 00:12:28,782
[passengers chattering]

172
00:12:35,221 --> 00:12:36,690
Yep. Okay.

173
00:12:39,492 --> 00:12:41,161
[grunts]

174
00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:46,199
[PA dings]

175
00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:47,600
- Hey.
- Hi.

176
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:49,569
Oh, my God.

177
00:13:09,890 --> 00:13:10,256
[grunts]

178
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:25,505
- Ma"am.
- What? What? Sorry.

179
00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:28,740
Do you need to - go to the lavatory?
- No.

180
00:13:29,750 --> 00:13:30,477
Are... Are you gonna vomit?

181
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:34,347
I was, uh, wondering
if you could do me a favor.

182
00:13:35,782 --> 00:13:37,500
Can you read this?

183
00:13:38,852 --> 00:13:40,787
What the hell?
Is this some kind of test?

184
00:13:40,954 --> 00:13:43,957
No. I mean, is it legible?

185
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,536
Your penmanship is terrible.

186
00:13:59,539 --> 00:14:05,445
"The watermark
appeared on my ceiling..."

187
00:14:07,814 --> 00:14:08,815
That"s right.

188
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:12,185
Are you a writer?

189
00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:15,655
Nah.

190
00:14:20,193 --> 00:14:21,695
I know who you are.

191
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:24,300
- You do?
- Yes, I do.

192
00:14:25,965 --> 00:14:27,734
See?

193
00:14:27,901 --> 00:14:31,705
Well, I mean, it doesn"t
exactly look like you, does it?

194
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,341
You... You seem to
let yourself go a little bit,

195
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:40,180
but this is the only picture anyone has
ever seen of the mysterious Shriver.

196
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:43,583
I"m Delta Jones.

197
00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:44,884
Hi.

198
00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:46,920
I... I"m also writing
a memoir myself.

199
00:14:48,655 --> 00:14:50,357
I go to this festival
every year.

200
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:52,726
Oh, and actually,
if you wouldn"t mind...

201
00:14:55,161 --> 00:14:59,599
[exhales] ...I"d really appreciate
it if you could sign this.

202
00:15:01,368 --> 00:15:03,360
You know what"s crazy?

203
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:05,739
I wasn"t even gonna go
to the festival this year.

204
00:15:06,806 --> 00:15:08,808
Then I found out
that you were coming,

205
00:15:09,900 --> 00:15:11,644
and I was like,
boom, there it is.

206
00:15:11,811 --> 00:15:15,181
That"s the sign. That"s what I said.
I was like, "That is the sign," you know,

207
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:19,219
because Shriver, - he will understand my work.
- Yeah.

208
00:15:19,386 --> 00:15:22,455
[sighs] So, yeah, let me
just help you out here, um...

209
00:15:22,622 --> 00:15:26,226
If you could, just say it, "To
Delta," like, right in that area.

210
00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:30,630
And... And, please, can you try to make
it remotely legible? That"d be great.

211
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:41,107
I... I can "t. Sorry. I can"t.

212
00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:42,375
What?

213
00:15:43,677 --> 00:15:44,778
Maybe later?

214
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,347
O... Okay. Yeah.

215
00:15:47,514 --> 00:15:49,582
[PA dings][flight attendant on PA]
Flight attendants,

216
00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:50,717
prepare for landing.

217
00:15:50,917 --> 00:15:53,553
["Na Na Na"
playing on car radio]

218
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:59,726
♪ Your head
Filling up with his words ♪

219
00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:06,700
[Delta] So, my memoir...

220
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:09,436
if you wouldn"t mind taking
a little peek at it.[grunts]

221
00:16:09,636 --> 00:16:11,400
It"s a quick read.

222
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,440
Uh, here you go.

223
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:15,842
Uh... [grunts]

224
00:16:16,900 --> 00:16:18,745
Oh, my God, I hope you"re not
offended by the graphic ***.

225
00:16:19,946 --> 00:16:21,181
Wait a minute.
What am I talking about?

226
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:22,282
Of course you wouldn"t be.

227
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:35,195
Shriver? Mr. Shriver?

228
00:16:36,296 --> 00:16:38,631
Excuse me, Miss. I gotta...[clerk] Mm-hmm.

229
00:16:38,832 --> 00:16:41,301
I need to get on the next flight
back to New York.

230
00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:42,769
Hmm.

231
00:16:42,969 --> 00:16:45,972
Yeah. Let me see
what I can do for you.

232
00:16:46,139 --> 00:16:49,420
I can get you on a flight about
an hour from now. Does that work?

233
00:17:03,757 --> 00:17:07,761
[Simone] Vodka martini, slightly
dirty, three olives, please.

234
00:17:13,330 --> 00:17:14,340
[sighs]

235
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:18,371
Kangaroo.

236
00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:23,209
Excuse me?

237
00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:29,382
Well, martinis with gin
with vodka, it"s a kangaroo.

238
00:17:31,317 --> 00:17:35,822
Well, I"m gonna enjoy
this vodka martini

239
00:17:36,220 --> 00:17:40,360
and then I just might order
another vodka martini.

240
00:17:41,695 --> 00:17:42,762
Sure.

241
00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:46,900
Of course, if you go into a bar
these days and ask for a kangaroo,

242
00:17:47,670 --> 00:17:51,471
you get some beer jockey with a man
bun looking at you like you"re insane,

243
00:17:51,638 --> 00:17:54,207
so, you probably better off
just calling it, uh...

244
00:17:54,374 --> 00:17:55,809
Yeah.

245
00:17:55,975 --> 00:17:57,430
Oh.

246
00:17:58,712 --> 00:18:02,849
Now that I have your permission,
this whole exchange was meaningless.

247
00:18:03,917 --> 00:18:04,918
Oh...

248
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:07,253
I suppose it was.

249
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:08,855
Thank you.

250
00:18:09,550 --> 00:18:10,924
Yeah, I"m sorry,
I didn"t mean to intrude.

251
00:18:11,910 --> 00:18:12,359
Can we not talk?

252
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:28,975
[grunts]

253
00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:30,877
You like to read?

254
00:18:32,278 --> 00:18:33,747
No, not really.

255
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:35,849
Oh, Okay, well, try it.

256
00:18:37,851 --> 00:18:39,686
Or just give it to someone.

257
00:18:55,602 --> 00:18:56,636
[Simone sighs]

258
00:19:12,786 --> 00:19:13,853
Hey.

259
00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:17,924
Excuse me, uh...

260
00:19:19,726 --> 00:19:22,950
Are you Professor Cleary?

261
00:19:22,295 --> 00:19:24,431
["Juno" playing on car radio]

262
00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:29,302
♪ I miss my ride ♪

263
00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:30,670
♪ Take it all in stride... ♪

264
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:33,206
I suppose I owe you an apology.

265
00:19:37,430 --> 00:19:38,311
[tires screech]

266
00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,679
[music stops]

267
00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:43,116
None of that ever happened.

268
00:19:44,317 --> 00:19:45,385
Okay.

269
00:19:45,585 --> 00:19:48,588
I need you to behave
for three days.

270
00:19:49,923 --> 00:19:51,124
Can you do that?

271
00:19:53,393 --> 00:19:54,394
Yeah.

272
00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:55,795
I need you to be

273
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:58,980
the man who wrote
one brilliant novel.

274
00:20:00,333 --> 00:20:05,372
And then you can go back to whatever
hole that you have been hiding in.

275
00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:13,513
[sighs]

276
00:20:16,383 --> 00:20:17,517
And there"s no car.

277
00:20:21,870 --> 00:20:22,255
The prize.

278
00:20:23,123 --> 00:20:26,493
It"s a shitty crystal plaque.

279
00:20:28,128 --> 00:20:29,262
[exhales]

280
00:20:35,168 --> 00:20:37,103
[cheerleaders chattering]

281
00:20:41,441 --> 00:20:43,576
Let"s see, Shriver.[mouse clicking]

282
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:47,514
Shriver. Shriver. Shriver.

283
00:20:50,183 --> 00:20:51,284
Shriver.

284
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:53,820
[sighs]

285
00:20:53,987 --> 00:20:55,221
How long can this possibly... Ha!

286
00:20:55,288 --> 00:20:57,457
Here you are, Mr. Shriver.

287
00:20:57,624 --> 00:20:59,192
And your room
is already paid for.

288
00:20:59,392 --> 00:21:01,561
May I just see a credit card
for incidentals?

289
00:21:03,129 --> 00:21:04,164
I don"t have one.

290
00:21:06,332 --> 00:21:08,768
I"m afraid
that"s not possible, sir.

291
00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:10,870
Uh,

292
00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:13,840
it is. It "s... It"s possible.

293
00:21:18,411 --> 00:21:19,913
I just never got one.

294
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:24,451
[clerk]
That will work. Thank you.

295
00:21:27,530 --> 00:21:28,880
[card machine beeps]

296
00:21:28,922 --> 00:21:30,724
Room service is until 8:00 p.m.

297
00:21:30,890 --> 00:21:33,760
The Rabbit Hole is open
from 7:00 a.m. till midnight.

298
00:21:33,927 --> 00:21:35,950
And this is your tote.

299
00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:36,529
Thank you.

300
00:21:36,730 --> 00:21:39,766
Everything you need is in here.

301
00:21:42,902 --> 00:21:44,204
Your have your schedule.

302
00:21:48,410 --> 00:21:52,645
And, um, discount coupons
for businesses in town.

303
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:54,814
Yeah, sure.

304
00:21:55,150 --> 00:21:57,830
I"ll come get you
in the morning.

305
00:21:58,952 --> 00:21:59,953
Yeah.

306
00:22:00,987 --> 00:22:02,550
[Simone] Thank you.

307
00:22:06,226 --> 00:22:08,228
What are... What are incidentals?

308
00:22:09,362 --> 00:22:13,266
For room service,
any extra costs to the room.

309
00:22:14,501 --> 00:22:15,702
- Oh, right.
- Mm-hmm.

310
00:22:17,103 --> 00:22:19,720
I won"t do that.
I won"t do that.

311
00:22:29,849 --> 00:22:30,950
[mutters]

312
00:22:36,289 --> 00:22:37,357
[lock rattles]

313
00:22:37,524 --> 00:22:38,591
What the heck?

314
00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:40,393
Come on.[lock rattles]

315
00:22:41,261 --> 00:22:42,262
Come on.

316
00:22:43,263 --> 00:22:44,664
Jesus Christ.

317
00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:47,133
Hey, you.

318
00:22:48,568 --> 00:22:50,437
What"s going on?
Do you need help with that?

319
00:22:51,604 --> 00:22:53,740
- No.
- You"ve got to be careful,

320
00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:56,876
"cause with these old locks, you"ve
got to actually turn it to the left.

321
00:22:57,944 --> 00:22:59,512
Ah, there you go.

322
00:23:01,181 --> 00:23:05,180
Oh, my God! Why did they not
give you a nicer room than this?

323
00:23:05,185 --> 00:23:07,187
[Shriver]
Oh, really, I"ll be fine.

324
00:23:07,387 --> 00:23:10,123
Oh, my God, you know what?
Take my room.

325
00:23:10,290 --> 00:23:13,326
Oh, my God, please, please, just take
my room. It"s way nicer than this.

326
00:23:13,526 --> 00:23:15,862
Look at that old TV. Criminal.

327
00:23:16,290 --> 00:23:17,731
I"ll be fine.
All right?

328
00:23:17,897 --> 00:23:19,699
- You sure?
- I"m sure. Thank you.

329
00:23:19,866 --> 00:23:22,680
Okay. Well, just let me know
if you need anything. Okay?

330
00:23:22,268 --> 00:23:23,436
- I"ll do that.
- All right.

331
00:23:23,603 --> 00:23:27,173
[breathes deeply]

332
00:23:38,618 --> 00:23:42,550
[imaginary Shriver] You almost blew it
with that lovely professor back there.

333
00:23:42,222 --> 00:23:46,359
How much longer do you think you can
keep selling this farce to everyone else?

334
00:23:52,332 --> 00:23:53,767
Not long, I imagine.

335
00:23:54,667 --> 00:23:55,869
Hmm.

336
00:23:57,370 --> 00:23:59,639
That tag around your neck,
that"s a nice touch.

337
00:24:04,944 --> 00:24:06,980
I only wonder
if your little deception

338
00:24:07,180 --> 00:24:09,816
plays out as comedy
or a tragedy.

339
00:24:12,185 --> 00:24:13,653
Is there any difference?

340
00:24:29,836 --> 00:24:31,938
[narrator] The watermark
appeared on my ceiling

341
00:24:32,105 --> 00:24:36,409
on the rainy day my wife walked
out on me.[door opens, closes]

342
00:24:36,576 --> 00:24:38,712
At first it was just a spot,

343
00:24:38,912 --> 00:24:41,581
approximately the size
of a quarter,

344
00:24:41,781 --> 00:24:44,484
directly above the bed
where I lay weeping.

345
00:24:46,219 --> 00:24:49,222
Listening to the rain fall,
I watched the watermark grow

346
00:24:49,389 --> 00:24:52,392
ever so slowly
to the size of a baseball.

347
00:24:55,795 --> 00:24:57,297
After a few hours,

348
00:24:57,497 --> 00:24:59,432
the mark was as big
as a honeydew melon.

349
00:25:02,669 --> 00:25:04,537
[phone rings]

350
00:25:06,139 --> 00:25:08,441
What?[Simone]
Hey, I"ll be there in ten.

351
00:25:08,608 --> 00:25:10,543
Who is this? It"s Simone.

352
00:25:10,710 --> 00:25:11,711
Oh.

353
00:25:11,878 --> 00:25:13,460
Yeah.

354
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:16,683
[groans]

355
00:25:22,220 --> 00:25:23,230
- Hey.
- Hey.

356
00:25:23,156 --> 00:25:25,325
- Yeah. Wasserman.
- Hey.

357
00:25:25,492 --> 00:25:27,293
You can call me T.Great.

358
00:25:27,460 --> 00:25:30,663
I "m a... I"m a writer,
like yourself.

359
00:25:32,632 --> 00:25:33,633
Uh...

360
00:25:34,901 --> 00:25:37,871
I"ll be moderating your panel tomorrow.
[chuckles]

361
00:25:38,380 --> 00:25:40,974
- Panel?
- Yeah. Uh, it"s listed in your program.

362
00:25:43,176 --> 00:25:44,477
In the tote bag.

363
00:25:46,790 --> 00:25:48,815
Hey, what do you say
we go toss back a few

364
00:25:48,982 --> 00:25:51,117
and hash out
some talking points?

365
00:25:51,785 --> 00:25:52,819
I...

366
00:25:52,986 --> 00:25:54,554
[door opens]

367
00:25:55,655 --> 00:25:57,757
Well, good morning, Simone.

368
00:25:57,924 --> 00:26:03,563
You know, we all had our doubts when
Simone said that she had landed you,

369
00:26:03,763 --> 00:26:05,650
but here you are.

370
00:26:05,231 --> 00:26:07,000
- Here I am.
- Here he is.

371
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:08,935
[laughs] Unless

372
00:26:09,102 --> 00:26:13,239
the real Shriver is still in
hiding and he sent you to prank us.

373
00:26:14,808 --> 00:26:15,809
T...

374
00:26:15,975 --> 00:26:17,711
[Shriver, T. laughing]

375
00:26:19,279 --> 00:26:21,581
Hey, remind me to send you
one of my books.

376
00:26:22,349 --> 00:26:23,717
That"s generous of him.

377
00:26:23,883 --> 00:26:26,860
He can"t pay people
to haul those things away.

378
00:26:26,252 --> 00:26:30,390
His last novel had an 80-page
meditation on cutting hay, seriously.

379
00:26:30,557 --> 00:26:33,226
And this guy
belongs to him as well.

380
00:26:33,393 --> 00:26:35,261
He can"t drive
for obvious reasons.

381
00:26:36,863 --> 00:26:38,980
[horse blusters]

382
00:26:46,272 --> 00:26:49,442
[Simone] Listen, I"m sorry if I got
a little testy with you yesterday.

383
00:26:49,609 --> 00:26:51,911
I"ve just... I"ve got a lot
riding on this festival.

384
00:26:52,112 --> 00:26:53,847
[Shriver] Oh, no, I understand.
It"s my fault.

385
00:26:53,913 --> 00:26:55,448
So you ready for this?

386
00:26:56,349 --> 00:26:57,350
No.

387
00:26:58,118 --> 00:26:59,719
Of course not.

388
00:26:59,886 --> 00:27:02,555
I"m going to try to make this
as painless as possible.

389
00:27:02,722 --> 00:27:04,290
- I promise.
- All right.

390
00:27:04,457 --> 00:27:06,259
Yeah, I mean that.

391
00:27:06,426 --> 00:27:10,463
I"m a writer. I... I understand
the solitary activity of...

392
00:27:10,630 --> 00:27:12,632
Huh. I didn"t know
you were a writer.

393
00:27:12,832 --> 00:27:16,690
Well, right now, I"m a...
I"m a program administrator

394
00:27:16,269 --> 00:27:17,904
with a very
heavy teaching schedule,

395
00:27:18,710 --> 00:27:20,740
but I... I do carve out time
every day to write.

396
00:27:20,907 --> 00:27:22,208
Yeah.

397
00:27:23,843 --> 00:27:25,779
[student] - Hey, sorry to interrupt.
- Hi.

398
00:27:25,945 --> 00:27:29,516
I have Mr. Shriver"s - per diem for him.
- Great. Yeah, this is Teresa.

399
00:27:29,716 --> 00:27:30,850
She"s a graduate TA.

400
00:27:31,170 --> 00:27:32,719
Sorry about the coins.
We use the...

401
00:27:32,886 --> 00:27:34,921
- For me?
- Yeah, or if you want to just take that.

402
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:37,891
We use the vending machines, um,
on campus for the author expenses.

403
00:27:38,580 --> 00:27:39,526
And then also right now...

404
00:27:39,726 --> 00:27:40,760
Teresa... at our b...

405
00:27:40,927 --> 00:27:42,295
Yeah, nice.

406
00:27:42,462 --> 00:27:44,397
Don"t care.
Okay, cool. Yeah.

407
00:27:44,597 --> 00:27:48,335
Oh, you know who I spoke to after I
dropped you off, was your Mr. Cheadum.

408
00:27:48,501 --> 00:27:50,503
- Who?
- Cheadum, your agent?

409
00:27:50,970 --> 00:27:53,730
[chuckles]

410
00:27:53,239 --> 00:27:56,376
Um, anyway, I can"t even tell you
how excited he is that you"re back.

411
00:27:56,543 --> 00:27:58,678
And he wanted it
to be a surprise,

412
00:27:58,845 --> 00:28:01,748
but I gotta tell you, he"s gonna
arrive on time for your reading.

413
00:28:06,860 --> 00:28:07,554
[coins clattering]

414
00:28:11,558 --> 00:28:12,926
- [Simone] Shriver.
- Oh, shit.

415
00:28:13,930 --> 00:28:14,761
[Teresa] No, no, no. It"s... [Shriver] Sorry.

416
00:28:14,794 --> 00:28:16,596
- [Teresa] That"s okay.
- Shriver, this is unnecessary.

417
00:28:16,629 --> 00:28:18,331
She"s got this.
- This is what she"s here for. - Okay.

418
00:28:18,365 --> 00:28:19,432
[Shriver] Sorry.

419
00:28:19,632 --> 00:28:21,267
Teresa, you can pick those up.

420
00:28:24,771 --> 00:28:27,140
[students chattering]

421
00:29:23,596 --> 00:29:25,598
Mr. Shriver, Mr. Shriver.[writer] Shriver.

422
00:29:25,765 --> 00:29:28,368
If you could just read my manuscript...
I know you"re gonna love it.

423
00:29:28,401 --> 00:29:31,204
You don"t have to read it. You could
just write something in support.

424
00:29:31,404 --> 00:29:33,873
I could even write it for you.
It"d be very simple.

425
00:29:34,474 --> 00:29:36,476
[clamoring]

426
00:29:36,676 --> 00:29:38,578
[no audible dialogue]

427
00:29:43,750 --> 00:29:44,851
Shriver.

428
00:29:46,152 --> 00:29:47,320
Hey, hey.

429
00:29:47,487 --> 00:29:48,521
[writer] ...talk about it?

430
00:29:48,688 --> 00:29:50,123
I really appreciate this.

431
00:29:50,290 --> 00:29:51,725
Thank you very much.[writer] Yeah.

432
00:29:51,891 --> 00:29:53,159
- Thank you.
- Sure.

433
00:29:53,326 --> 00:29:55,128
- [Shriver] Jesus.
- Sorry about that.

434
00:29:55,295 --> 00:29:57,630
- It was a little overwhelming.
- Yeah.

435
00:29:57,230 --> 00:29:58,631
[ukulele music playing]

436
00:29:58,798 --> 00:30:02,902
♪ Shriver
Are you dead or alive? ♪

437
00:30:03,690 --> 00:30:07,640
♪ Are you underground somewhere
Writing a novel? ♪

438
00:30:08,675 --> 00:30:10,100
♪ Oh, Mr. Shriver ♪

439
00:30:10,176 --> 00:30:11,945
That"s really nice, but...

440
00:30:12,145 --> 00:30:13,680
♪ ...alive, sir? ♪

441
00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:15,882
♪ Or just a... ♪Stop.

442
00:30:21,621 --> 00:30:24,190
[Simone] Are you familiar
with Blythe Brown"s work?

443
00:30:24,357 --> 00:30:26,459
[Shriver] Oh, no.
I"m not familiar with that.

444
00:30:26,626 --> 00:30:30,960
Oh, well, I"ll make sure you... Teresa,
make sure he gets a copy of this book.

445
00:30:30,263 --> 00:30:32,232
It"s okay.
You can hold on to it.

446
00:30:32,399 --> 00:30:33,466
Thanks.

447
00:30:34,601 --> 00:30:36,102
[Brown] "She came to you.

448
00:30:36,269 --> 00:30:40,974
You, Black man, **** daddy,
protector of the oppressor,

449
00:30:41,174 --> 00:30:45,378
your gun, your stick,
you took her hand,

450
00:30:45,545 --> 00:30:46,780
pressed her throat,

451
00:30:46,946 --> 00:30:48,615
inhaled her face

452
00:30:48,782 --> 00:30:54,788
and took her and took her
until she could take no more."

453
00:30:54,954 --> 00:30:57,557
[applause]

454
00:31:05,565 --> 00:31:07,133
What a powerful reading.

455
00:31:07,300 --> 00:31:10,103
I"m sure you have a lot of
questions for Ms. Brown,

456
00:31:10,270 --> 00:31:13,940
so, uh, if you please, line up behind
these two microphones so we can begin.

457
00:31:18,678 --> 00:31:19,713
Anyone?

458
00:31:22,415 --> 00:31:24,551
[audience member coughs]

459
00:31:30,390 --> 00:31:31,391
Don"t be shy.

460
00:31:36,262 --> 00:31:37,997
Anybody? Um...

461
00:31:40,867 --> 00:31:42,602
Mr. Shriver has a question.

462
00:31:46,272 --> 00:31:47,707
What is it?

463
00:31:47,874 --> 00:31:49,876
[sparse applause]

464
00:31:54,848 --> 00:31:55,849
Um...

465
00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:08,228
Have you ever...

466
00:32:10,296 --> 00:32:11,631
Uh...

467
00:32:11,798 --> 00:32:14,634
Have you ever considered
writing from a...

468
00:32:15,602 --> 00:32:17,300
male point of view?

469
00:32:17,170 --> 00:32:19,873
[audience exclaims]
Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.

470
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,208
[audience member]
What did he say?[audience chattering]

471
00:32:23,510 --> 00:32:24,778
Hmm.

472
00:32:27,614 --> 00:32:29,949
You know, Mr. Shriver,

473
00:32:30,950 --> 00:32:32,252
I suppose your question

474
00:32:32,452 --> 00:32:34,521
is precisely
what I should have expected

475
00:32:34,688 --> 00:32:37,657
from the man who wrote
that overhyped,

476
00:32:37,824 --> 00:32:41,528
adolescent, macho wet dream
you call a novel.

477
00:32:41,695 --> 00:32:44,264
Oh, how it
scandalized housewives... Well, all right.

478
00:32:44,464 --> 00:32:46,990
And enthralled undergraduates.

479
00:32:46,266 --> 00:32:47,934
But let"s face it, folks.

480
00:32:48,101 --> 00:32:50,770
The only reason we"re even
talking about Mr. Shriver

481
00:32:50,937 --> 00:32:53,606
is for his famous
vanishing act.[audience laughs]

482
00:32:53,773 --> 00:32:56,242
Oh, and to answer your question,

483
00:32:57,210 --> 00:33:00,480
why the **** should I?

484
00:33:00,647 --> 00:33:03,830
[audience exclaims, claps]

485
00:33:04,818 --> 00:33:06,152
[audience member]
All right.

486
00:33:08,855 --> 00:33:12,920
Never mind. I"m sure you"re right.
Thank you for sharing your poetry.

487
00:33:12,258 --> 00:33:14,527
[chattering, applause]

488
00:33:16,563 --> 00:33:19,650
[Simone] There"s another question
over there and then over here.

489
00:33:21,735 --> 00:33:24,104
[journalist]
Shriver, you old devil.

490
00:33:25,238 --> 00:33:27,700
Still causing trouble?

491
00:33:29,442 --> 00:33:30,610
Jack Blunt.

492
00:33:30,810 --> 00:33:32,145
I interviewed you
for Rolling Stone

493
00:33:32,245 --> 00:33:34,314
back when Goat Time
was published.

494
00:33:34,514 --> 00:33:35,982
Hey, Blunt.

495
00:33:36,149 --> 00:33:38,618
That"s a long time ago.
I hardly recognize you.

496
00:33:38,818 --> 00:33:40,687
Yeah, but we only
talked on the phone.

497
00:33:40,854 --> 00:33:44,240
Oh, of course. - Sorry. Forgot.
- No, that"s no problem.

498
00:33:44,190 --> 00:33:47,327
Hey, listen, do you have, like,
a few seconds to chat real quick?

499
00:33:47,527 --> 00:33:50,300
I just need a few words
about why you decided

500
00:33:50,196 --> 00:33:52,766
to reemerge
onto the literary scene?

501
00:33:52,966 --> 00:33:54,167
I"m not doing interviews.

502
00:33:54,334 --> 00:33:56,469
Perfect.
You can give me an exclusive.

503
00:33:56,636 --> 00:33:57,871
[breathes deeply]

504
00:33:58,705 --> 00:34:01,700
I don"t have anything to say.

505
00:34:02,475 --> 00:34:05,779
Come here for a second. I "m...
I"m gonna level with you. Um...

506
00:34:05,979 --> 00:34:09,883
When I first interviewed you,
I was on staff at Rolling Stone.

507
00:34:10,500 --> 00:34:11,785
Do you wanna know
what I"m doing now?

508
00:34:11,985 --> 00:34:13,653
Hmm.

509
00:34:13,853 --> 00:34:16,856
I"m working for some ****ing
online magazine doing profiles

510
00:34:17,230 --> 00:34:19,759
of twentysomething
shit bag scribblers

511
00:34:19,926 --> 00:34:22,796
who aren"t fit to lick
the sweat from your balls.

512
00:34:22,996 --> 00:34:25,131
Do you feel what I"m saying?

513
00:34:25,298 --> 00:34:28,134
I see that you"ve reconnected
with an old friend.

514
00:34:29,169 --> 00:34:30,303
Him?

515
00:34:32,720 --> 00:34:34,574
You... You don"t mind doing
this interview, do you?

516
00:34:36,900 --> 00:34:37,510
Besides, you owe me one.

517
00:34:39,512 --> 00:34:40,580
I"ll see you at dinner.

518
00:34:41,681 --> 00:34:42,949
I need a drink.

519
00:34:43,883 --> 00:34:45,850
[Blunt] Well, I"m the guy.

520
00:34:48,621 --> 00:34:53,193
Twenty years ago, you burst onto the
scene with this huge ****ing novel.

521
00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:54,527
You"re everywhere.

522
00:34:54,694 --> 00:34:57,764
Front page reviews,
Time, Newsweek.

523
00:34:57,931 --> 00:34:59,332
No pictures.

524
00:34:59,499 --> 00:35:01,301
The more you hide,
the more they write about you,

525
00:35:01,334 --> 00:35:03,837
the more the book sells.
But who is this guy?

526
00:35:04,370 --> 00:35:06,840
Then you win the National Book Award.
You don"t show up to get it.

527
00:35:07,400 --> 00:35:09,909
Then it"s the National Prize
for the Humanities.

528
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:15,382
President Bill Clinton himself is
going to hang a medal around your neck.

529
00:35:15,548 --> 00:35:17,851
Surely, you"ll emerge for this.

530
00:35:18,510 --> 00:35:20,530
I rented a freaking tux.

531
00:35:20,220 --> 00:35:21,254
And then...

532
00:35:22,655 --> 00:35:23,823
And then?

533
00:35:25,792 --> 00:35:27,660
And then nothing. You"re gone.

534
00:35:27,827 --> 00:35:29,662
No Shriver. Poof!

535
00:35:29,829 --> 00:35:31,965
Like Keyser ****ing Soöze.

536
00:35:32,132 --> 00:35:33,700
I looked everywhere for you.

537
00:35:33,867 --> 00:35:36,936
Where have you been all this time?
What you been doing?

538
00:35:37,103 --> 00:35:39,105
- This and that.
- Writing?

539
00:35:39,272 --> 00:35:40,940
- Some.
- What do you got? Books?

540
00:35:41,107 --> 00:35:44,944
Novel, memoir, stories? What?

541
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:50,750
Now, you show up at this amateur-hour,
shit show, poor excuse for a festival?

542
00:35:50,950 --> 00:35:52,852
Come on. What is this?

543
00:35:53,190 --> 00:35:54,587
Doesn"t make any sense.

544
00:35:58,191 --> 00:35:59,859
I"m on to you.

545
00:36:06,833 --> 00:36:08,168
I"m not Shriver.

546
00:36:09,135 --> 00:36:11,370
That "s cute. That" s...

547
00:36:11,204 --> 00:36:14,708
No. I mean, I"m a Shriver.

548
00:36:15,875 --> 00:36:18,745
But I"m not the Shriver
who wrote the book.

549
00:36:19,446 --> 00:36:20,647
I"m not that Shriver.

550
00:36:21,314 --> 00:36:22,482
Of course not.

551
00:36:23,783 --> 00:36:26,853
You"re Shriver the shape-shifter
in Goat Time

552
00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:31,157
who weaves a cocoon around
himself and then emerges...

553
00:36:31,324 --> 00:36:32,726
I"m not that Shriver... unchanged.

554
00:36:32,892 --> 00:36:34,461
You"re reenacting
the non-reinvention...

555
00:36:34,627 --> 00:36:36,863
I"m not Shriver!...of your protagonist!

556
00:36:37,300 --> 00:36:38,365
I"m not Shriver!

557
00:36:39,299 --> 00:36:42,502
Come on. Hey.
All right. Fine. Go.

558
00:36:42,669 --> 00:36:45,472
But I"m gonna tell you
something, this goes up tonight.

559
00:36:46,573 --> 00:36:48,475
Up? What... - What goes up?
- This story.

560
00:36:48,641 --> 00:36:50,377
But I haven"t told you anything.

561
00:36:50,577 --> 00:36:53,747
You don"t know the beauty
of Internet journalism.

562
00:36:53,913 --> 00:36:57,117
Absolutely nothing
is more than enough.

563
00:36:57,317 --> 00:37:00,860
And I just had drinks
with Shriver.

564
00:37:00,253 --> 00:37:01,454
That"s the story.

565
00:37:01,621 --> 00:37:03,923
Everything else is just filler.

566
00:37:04,900 --> 00:37:05,692
But you didn"t.

567
00:37:05,892 --> 00:37:07,600
I didn"t what?

568
00:37:08,194 --> 00:37:09,829
Have drinks with Shriver.

569
00:37:10,300 --> 00:37:11,331
Don"t **** with me, Shriver.

570
00:37:27,947 --> 00:37:29,482
[no audible dialogue]

571
00:37:47,367 --> 00:37:48,368
All right.

572
00:37:53,306 --> 00:37:54,307
All right.

573
00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:56,543
I got it. I got it.

574
00:37:56,710 --> 00:37:59,279
- What, are you following me?
- And you can keep the change.

575
00:38:10,824 --> 00:38:13,760
[Simone] Uh, may I present Victor
Shastri Bennet, the playwright.

576
00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:16,696
Ah, no need for formalities.
Call me VSB, please.

577
00:38:16,863 --> 00:38:19,466
We"re discussing Fugard, Soyinka

578
00:38:19,632 --> 00:38:22,569
and intertextuality
as it relates to my work.

579
00:38:22,736 --> 00:38:24,170
Oh, please.

580
00:38:24,971 --> 00:38:25,972
Continue.

581
00:38:26,720 --> 00:38:28,800
This man needs a whiskey.

582
00:38:29,576 --> 00:38:32,846
Can I get a... a
kangaroo?[server] Excuse me?

583
00:38:33,847 --> 00:38:35,615
The bartender will know.

584
00:38:35,782 --> 00:38:38,180
I don"t know if you"ve
officially met Blythe Brown,

585
00:38:38,184 --> 00:38:40,487
and this is
her companion, Layla.

586
00:38:41,888 --> 00:38:44,900
So, Shriver, tell me, are
you a big fan of the theater?

587
00:38:44,290 --> 00:38:46,493
Have you seen anything
worth writing home about lately?

588
00:38:46,659 --> 00:38:50,630
- Mmm.
- Oh, yeah. Yeah, a lot. I"ve seen a lot.

589
00:38:50,230 --> 00:38:52,980
What"s that?[Layla] Like what?

590
00:38:52,298 --> 00:38:55,935
Yeah, I... I"ve seen some things.

591
00:38:56,102 --> 00:38:58,710
[Victor] All right.
Anything of late, you know?

592
00:38:59,639 --> 00:39:03,743
Any works that you"ve sort
of been taken by? Tell me.

593
00:39:04,744 --> 00:39:07,947
Uh, yes. So, uh...

594
00:39:08,114 --> 00:39:09,182
Oh, here it is.

595
00:39:10,517 --> 00:39:12,585
[Simone]
So, what do you do, Ms. Layla?

596
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:15,455
I"m a sculptor.

597
00:39:16,222 --> 00:39:17,824
And what is your medium?

598
00:39:18,240 --> 00:39:19,250
Pipe cleaners?

599
00:39:19,920 --> 00:39:20,660
Play-Doh?

600
00:39:20,827 --> 00:39:22,362
Uh, cake.

601
00:39:22,529 --> 00:39:23,763
- Did you say cake?
- Mm-hmm.

602
00:39:23,930 --> 00:39:26,666
- Cake.
- Sometimes we eat them.

603
00:39:26,833 --> 00:39:29,350
[T.] She said cake,
Shriver. Did you hear?

604
00:39:29,202 --> 00:39:30,337
Yeah.

605
00:39:30,503 --> 00:39:32,380
- [Layla] Yeah.
- That"s odd.

606
00:39:34,274 --> 00:39:35,342
Odd?

607
00:39:36,509 --> 00:39:38,645
No, that"s not... Oh, shit.

608
00:39:38,812 --> 00:39:40,146
That came out wrong. Uh...

609
00:39:40,347 --> 00:39:42,382
Uh, no offense.

610
00:39:42,549 --> 00:39:44,851
I don"t know what
I find more offensive,

611
00:39:45,510 --> 00:39:49,522
your insistence on seeing the world
through the prism of the ***ist patriarchy

612
00:39:49,689 --> 00:39:56,229
or your belligerent refusal to take seriously
the work of committed women artists.

613
00:39:59,165 --> 00:40:01,835
Yeah, I suppose you could
find them equally offensive.

614
00:40:03,169 --> 00:40:04,237
Yeah.

615
00:40:05,500 --> 00:40:06,172
[chuckles]

616
00:40:07,407 --> 00:40:08,742
Cheers!

617
00:40:08,942 --> 00:40:12,145
[all] Cheers![laughing, chattering]

618
00:40:13,747 --> 00:40:15,949
[acoustic music playing]

619
00:40:16,116 --> 00:40:17,951
♪ And come what may ♪

620
00:40:19,152 --> 00:40:22,288
♪ I"ve always seen ♪

621
00:40:22,455 --> 00:40:26,593
♪ Remember that
Whole worlds were made... ♪

622
00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:27,761
Are you okay?

623
00:40:28,762 --> 00:40:29,996
Yeah. Fine.

624
00:40:30,997 --> 00:40:33,330
Uh...

625
00:40:33,199 --> 00:40:37,837
Do you happen to recall when exactly,
uh, this agent is arriving? My agent?

626
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:39,720
Oh.

627
00:40:39,272 --> 00:40:41,474
He didn"t specify.

628
00:40:41,641 --> 00:40:43,843
- Okay.
- He made his own arrangements.

629
00:40:45,745 --> 00:40:46,880
Oh, shit.

630
00:40:47,470 --> 00:40:48,214
Time.

631
00:40:48,882 --> 00:40:50,316
Back to campus

632
00:40:50,483 --> 00:40:53,586
for a play from our
very own Victor Bennet.

633
00:40:53,753 --> 00:40:55,550
Ah...

634
00:40:55,221 --> 00:40:56,222
Really?

635
00:40:56,356 --> 00:40:58,591
[Simone chuckles]
Hold up.

636
00:41:20,513 --> 00:41:22,649
[Shriver]
Are you sure this is okay?

637
00:41:22,816 --> 00:41:27,620
[T.] As long as Simone... Professor
Cleary doesn"t catch us. [chuckles]

638
00:41:27,787 --> 00:41:29,789
Yeah, I don"t want
to make her angry.

639
00:41:32,992 --> 00:41:34,600
[sighs]

640
00:41:35,362 --> 00:41:37,530
You"re sweet on her,
aren"t you, Shriver?

641
00:41:38,698 --> 00:41:39,899
No.

642
00:41:40,660 --> 00:41:41,401
[chuckles]

643
00:41:41,568 --> 00:41:42,702
Be gentle with her.

644
00:41:43,903 --> 00:41:45,500
She"s been hurt.

645
00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:48,475
Betrayed by the man she loved.

646
00:41:49,542 --> 00:41:50,844
Some years ago...

647
00:41:52,912 --> 00:41:54,848
fresh off of her wounds,

648
00:41:55,150 --> 00:41:57,150
Simone fell for a...

649
00:41:58,818 --> 00:42:00,854
decidedly third-rate poet.

650
00:42:07,930 --> 00:42:08,595
A traveler came by

651
00:42:10,363 --> 00:42:11,831
and silently,

652
00:42:12,932 --> 00:42:14,234
invisibly...

653
00:42:16,736 --> 00:42:18,405
took her with a sigh.

654
00:42:22,976 --> 00:42:24,411
[exhales]

655
00:42:24,577 --> 00:42:26,579
He was maddeningly handsome, though.

656
00:42:29,382 --> 00:42:32,152
[applause, cheering in distance]

657
00:42:34,254 --> 00:42:36,589
You better, uh, get on up there.

658
00:42:36,756 --> 00:42:38,124
They"ll miss you.

659
00:42:41,294 --> 00:42:42,429
All right.

660
00:42:52,339 --> 00:42:54,341
It"s an hour of my life
I"m never gonna get back.

661
00:42:54,507 --> 00:42:56,343
Yeah. Yeah.

662
00:42:56,509 --> 00:42:59,779
Oh! Shriver! So, tell me,
what did you think?

663
00:43:02,820 --> 00:43:03,450
Uh...

664
00:43:04,484 --> 00:43:05,885
I"m sorry, I missed it.

665
00:43:08,355 --> 00:43:12,359
But perhaps you would do me the
honor of allowing me to read it?

666
00:43:13,760 --> 00:43:15,280
[Victor] Thank you.

667
00:43:16,596 --> 00:43:18,331
That... That would mean
a lot to me, actually.

668
00:43:18,498 --> 00:43:19,966
My pleasure.

669
00:43:20,166 --> 00:43:22,736
Well, my public awaits.

670
00:43:22,902 --> 00:43:23,903
Yes.

671
00:43:24,700 --> 00:43:25,305
- I"ll see you later.
- Bye now.

672
00:43:25,472 --> 00:43:27,540
- Congratulations.
- Thank you. Appreciate you.

673
00:43:42,455 --> 00:43:43,523
[sighs]

674
00:43:46,826 --> 00:43:47,994
Thank you

675
00:43:48,828 --> 00:43:50,960
for Victor Bennet.

676
00:43:52,980 --> 00:43:55,101
I hope you know how much it means
to the university that you"re here.

677
00:43:56,703 --> 00:43:57,837
And to me.

678
00:44:01,708 --> 00:44:07,547
For years, I"ve been torn between
fighting to make this a better place

679
00:44:07,714 --> 00:44:12,218
or just to putting 100% of my energies
into making it as a writer, finally.

680
00:44:13,553 --> 00:44:16,956
Either way, I"m just tilting
at windmills, you know?

681
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:21,661
Well, it"s better than running into "em.
[chuckles]

682
00:44:38,478 --> 00:44:40,460
Oh, Mr. Shriver.

683
00:44:58,264 --> 00:45:00,200
[elevator dings][person chuckles]

684
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:01,935
- Jacuzzi time.
- Yeah.

685
00:45:02,135 --> 00:45:03,770
- What?
- Just text him.

686
00:45:03,937 --> 00:45:04,938
No.

687
00:45:10,310 --> 00:45:12,450
I"ve got your number, buddy.

688
00:45:13,460 --> 00:45:14,447
Why?

689
00:45:14,614 --> 00:45:16,516
Something about you
just doesn"t smell right.

690
00:45:20,860 --> 00:45:21,870
[elevator dings]

691
00:45:24,491 --> 00:45:25,492
[sniffs]

692
00:45:38,872 --> 00:45:41,241
[imaginary Shriver] Well, you
conned your way through day one.

693
00:45:42,409 --> 00:45:44,511
But it"s gonna get
more difficult after this.

694
00:45:45,745 --> 00:45:47,414
I don"t know what to do.

695
00:45:47,614 --> 00:45:50,784
I"d keep an eye on that cake lady.
She could be trouble.

696
00:45:51,284 --> 00:45:53,753
Well, she hates my book,
that"s for sure.

697
00:45:53,953 --> 00:45:57,557
Your book? Listen to you, starting
to believe your own bullshit.

698
00:45:57,724 --> 00:46:00,293
You can lie to them, but not me.

699
00:46:02,328 --> 00:46:03,396
[knocks on door]

700
00:46:03,563 --> 00:46:04,864
Open up. Police.

701
00:46:06,733 --> 00:46:07,834
What?

702
00:46:09,836 --> 00:46:11,304
What"s the problem?

703
00:46:17,210 --> 00:46:19,312
[laughs]

704
00:46:19,479 --> 00:46:22,349
There"s no sleeping, Shriver.
[chuckles]

705
00:46:24,784 --> 00:46:27,120
[Teresa] Okay.[T.] Let"s have one
of those cups, thank you.

706
00:46:27,187 --> 00:46:28,655
Are you avoiding me?

707
00:46:28,855 --> 00:46:29,889
Yes.

708
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:31,524
Can"t say I blame you.

709
00:46:32,359 --> 00:46:34,270
Where"s Layla?

710
00:46:34,194 --> 00:46:36,629
In our room, - sulking as per usual.
- You spilled a lot of it.

711
00:46:37,497 --> 00:46:38,498
[Teresa] Cheers.

712
00:46:38,531 --> 00:46:40,533
How dare you?

713
00:46:40,734 --> 00:46:43,300
Have a party
and not even invite me, Shriver.

714
00:46:43,169 --> 00:46:44,237
Come on!

715
00:46:44,437 --> 00:46:45,772
You"re rude.

716
00:46:45,939 --> 00:46:48,808
Ah, hey, now.
Have a look at that.

717
00:46:50,844 --> 00:46:52,120
Come down!

718
00:46:53,513 --> 00:46:57,584
I believe that we would be fools
to pass up such an invitation.

719
00:46:58,318 --> 00:46:59,586
I"m kind of tired.

720
00:47:00,120 --> 00:47:01,121
Shriver.

721
00:47:01,254 --> 00:47:03,623
Where"s that bon vivant esprit

722
00:47:03,823 --> 00:47:06,760
that I would expect from the man
that wrote Goat Time?

723
00:47:06,960 --> 00:47:08,194
[Teresa] T., it"s disgusting.

724
00:47:08,395 --> 00:47:09,729
You"re too old and decrepit

725
00:47:09,896 --> 00:47:12,432
- to be talking about that.
- Bite thy tongue, lass.

726
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:17,700
I may be old,
but I have poetry on my side.

727
00:47:17,270 --> 00:47:18,838
I"m in.

728
00:47:20,540 --> 00:47:22,420
I"m gonna call it a night.

729
00:47:25,412 --> 00:47:27,480
I"m very disappointed
in you, Shriver.

730
00:47:30,917 --> 00:47:32,719
- Come on, Teresa.
- O... Okay.

731
00:47:32,886 --> 00:47:35,522
I guess my work here is done.

732
00:47:35,722 --> 00:47:37,223
I"ll see you in the morning.

733
00:47:37,924 --> 00:47:39,426
Where is everyone going?

734
00:47:39,592 --> 00:47:40,593
[door closes]

735
00:47:41,494 --> 00:47:44,531
Well, that broke up fast. Yeah?

736
00:47:44,731 --> 00:47:47,330
So, you know what? All good.

737
00:47:48,100 --> 00:47:49,602
You know where to find me.

738
00:47:52,806 --> 00:47:55,342
[door opens, closes]

739
00:47:58,611 --> 00:48:01,214
[music continues outside][person whooping]

740
00:48:04,484 --> 00:48:06,186
[chattering]

741
00:48:17,970 --> 00:48:19,532
[train chugging]

742
00:48:21,835 --> 00:48:23,770
[train whistle blowing]

743
00:48:36,850 --> 00:48:40,253
[narrator] All night long
I lay there, wide awake,

744
00:48:40,420 --> 00:48:42,222
wondering what the watermark
would look like

745
00:48:42,389 --> 00:48:45,291
when daylight started
creeping in the next morning.

746
00:48:45,492 --> 00:48:47,961
[Shriver]
Good night, Mr. Bojangles.

747
00:48:48,128 --> 00:48:51,831
[narrator] As dawn broke, I saw
the spot had grown even more...

748
00:48:51,998 --> 00:48:54,701
[purring][Shriver]
Good night, Mr. Bojangles.

749
00:48:54,868 --> 00:48:58,805
[narrator] ...now to the general
size and shape of an adult person.

750
00:49:03,843 --> 00:49:04,878
Wha...

751
00:49:08,782 --> 00:49:10,517
[groans] Hello.

752
00:49:10,717 --> 00:49:12,752
Hi. It"s Teresa.
I"m in the lobby.

753
00:49:13,219 --> 00:49:15,880
Who? What?

754
00:49:15,288 --> 00:49:17,724
You"re talking to my creative
writing workshop this morning.

755
00:49:19,292 --> 00:49:22,495
Mmm. No, that"s a mistake.

756
00:49:22,662 --> 00:49:24,531
No, it"s not a mistake.
It"s in the program.

757
00:49:24,731 --> 00:49:26,990
Didn"t you get a program?

758
00:49:27,233 --> 00:49:29,102
Uh, no, I never got a program.

759
00:49:30,470 --> 00:49:32,972
Okay. Well, um,
class starts in 20 minutes.[sighs]

760
00:49:37,911 --> 00:49:39,846
[students chattering]

761
00:49:41,247 --> 00:49:43,249
[cheerleader] - You guys grab breakfast?
- Oh, crap.

762
00:49:47,120 --> 00:49:48,455
[cheerleader 2]
Never stop planning.

763
00:49:48,488 --> 00:49:50,323
[cheerleader]
You"re overthinking it.

764
00:49:54,227 --> 00:49:56,763
She was at the bar, and then
she would"ve come back upstairs.

765
00:49:56,930 --> 00:49:59,132
So, if you were here last night,
I"m asking if you saw anything?

766
00:49:59,132 --> 00:50:00,266
- I don"t know.
- Excuse me.

767
00:50:00,433 --> 00:50:01,968
- Shriver!
- Oh, Shriver, we gotta go.

768
00:50:02,135 --> 00:50:04,704
- Good morning, Shriver.
- Uh, I locked my key in my room.

769
00:50:04,871 --> 00:50:06,272
Blythe never came back
last night.

770
00:50:06,439 --> 00:50:08,274
You know that?
She"s gone. She just vanished.

771
00:50:08,441 --> 00:50:10,710
We have to go. - The class is waiting.
- That"s unfortunate.

772
00:50:10,710 --> 00:50:13,413
Maybe she just went for a
walk.[Layla] Just a walk?

773
00:50:13,580 --> 00:50:19,519
- Where would she have walked to?
- Well, a walk doesn"t imply some specific destination.

774
00:50:19,686 --> 00:50:22,655
"I am he that walks with
the tender and growing night."

775
00:50:22,822 --> 00:50:23,823
Whitman.

776
00:50:24,958 --> 00:50:26,593
- Okay. We have to go.
- Oh, my God.

777
00:50:26,793 --> 00:50:28,862
Wasn"t she
in your room last night?

778
00:50:30,964 --> 00:50:32,365
Yeah, but she left.

779
00:50:32,532 --> 00:50:33,700
What time was that?

780
00:50:34,901 --> 00:50:36,836
- I have no idea.
- How do you not know?

781
00:50:37,300 --> 00:50:39,339
The man doesn"t know. He has more
important things to think about.

782
00:50:39,372 --> 00:50:40,974
You don"t know?
I"m gonna call the police!

783
00:50:41,700 --> 00:50:43,476
- [Teresa] We have to go.
- That"s not good.

784
00:50:43,677 --> 00:50:45,745
What do they expect from me?
Your students.

785
00:50:45,912 --> 00:50:47,781
Um, like, nothing.
I told them you"re a genius.

786
00:50:47,847 --> 00:50:49,716
Whatever you say,
they"re gonna eat it up.

787
00:50:49,883 --> 00:50:52,519
I had them read the book. I think
some of them actually did read it.

788
00:50:54,187 --> 00:50:57,424
Also, they all want to be writers
and none of them like to read.

789
00:51:17,310 --> 00:51:18,945
Why is your book
so misogynistic?

790
00:51:19,145 --> 00:51:20,313
I think it"s erotic.

791
00:51:20,480 --> 00:51:22,315
It"s just dirty.

792
00:51:22,482 --> 00:51:24,784
So? Life is dirty.

793
00:51:24,951 --> 00:51:27,354
And I wanna ask,
why did you choose

794
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:31,758
to name your main character
after yourself?

795
00:51:31,925 --> 00:51:35,362
Uh, I couldn"t think of another
name and mine was handy.

796
00:51:36,229 --> 00:51:37,731
Well, what happened to the wife?

797
00:51:37,897 --> 00:51:39,232
How can she disappear like that?

798
00:51:39,399 --> 00:51:41,340
Well, he killed her, right?

799
00:51:41,735 --> 00:51:43,770
Nah, he didn"t kill her.

800
00:51:43,937 --> 00:51:45,205
[student] What"s true?

801
00:51:48,308 --> 00:51:51,244
What do you use from your imagination
and what comes from your life?

802
00:51:58,510 --> 00:52:00,687
Well, to be honest, uh,

803
00:52:00,854 --> 00:52:04,557
I have trouble telling the difference
between reality and imagination.

804
00:52:04,758 --> 00:52:05,825
[chuckles]

805
00:52:09,496 --> 00:52:14,934
But how do you understand your
experience without imagination?

806
00:52:16,936 --> 00:52:20,600
Fiction or stories,

807
00:52:20,206 --> 00:52:23,810
it"s a tool that humans have
that no other creatures has

808
00:52:24,844 --> 00:52:27,213
to make sense of our existence.

809
00:52:28,815 --> 00:52:31,151
We create a fictional world...

810
00:52:33,386 --> 00:52:37,957
as a laboratory to make sense
of the actual world.

811
00:52:41,127 --> 00:52:44,731
[imaginary Shriver
breathes heavily]

812
00:53:10,857 --> 00:53:11,891
[chuckles]

813
00:53:14,694 --> 00:53:15,762
Thanks.

814
00:53:34,948 --> 00:53:38,485
[Teresa] I"m excited for the students
to meet, like, a real writer.

815
00:53:38,651 --> 00:53:40,854
[Shriver] Well, aren"t there
plenty of real writers here?

816
00:53:40,954 --> 00:53:42,222
[Teresa]
T., Simone.

817
00:53:44,524 --> 00:53:46,726
It"s like the only place
you can find their books

818
00:53:46,893 --> 00:53:50,397
is in the college bookstore
in the local author section.

819
00:53:53,900 --> 00:53:55,935
[Shriver] I didn"t know
Simone had published a book.

820
00:53:57,971 --> 00:53:59,839
[Teresa]
She actually published two.

821
00:54:01,474 --> 00:54:03,643
And the thing is,
she"s not a bad writer.

822
00:54:04,678 --> 00:54:06,790
She"s actually pretty good.

823
00:54:07,380 --> 00:54:09,382
She"s just kind of like
a cautionary tale.

824
00:54:09,549 --> 00:54:11,751
[Shriver] What? How"s that?

825
00:54:11,918 --> 00:54:14,421
Because, like, when I"m her age,
I want to be in Brooklyn

826
00:54:14,621 --> 00:54:16,656
with a writing career
and an editor and an agent.

827
00:54:16,823 --> 00:54:18,792
I don"t want to be
in ****ing Acheron.

828
00:54:44,217 --> 00:54:46,119
Oh, there you are.
Come on, we gotta go.

829
00:54:46,286 --> 00:54:48,388
- What?
- We"re really late. We gotta go.

830
00:54:48,555 --> 00:54:50,523
Can I... Can I take these?

831
00:54:50,690 --> 00:54:53,326
What? Uh, yeah. Would you
put these on my account?

832
00:54:54,294 --> 00:54:55,595
Thank you so much.

833
00:54:55,795 --> 00:54:56,796
I got it.

834
00:55:13,130 --> 00:55:14,848
[T. chuckles]

835
00:55:15,150 --> 00:55:19,352
Oh, you missed one hell of a party
last night, Shriver. [chuckles]

836
00:55:19,552 --> 00:55:21,287
Beyond the beyond.

837
00:55:22,422 --> 00:55:26,626
But what happens at Hotel 99
stays in Hotel 99.

838
00:55:28,595 --> 00:55:31,998
But I"m gonna write a best-selling book
about that place one of these days.

839
00:55:32,165 --> 00:55:34,801
I was hoping to have you
in one of the chapters.

840
00:55:36,690 --> 00:55:38,571
Didn"t you just say
what happens there stays there?

841
00:55:40,573 --> 00:55:42,142
Well...[Victor] Hi, guys.

842
00:55:42,942 --> 00:55:44,477
Hey, Victor.

843
00:55:44,644 --> 00:55:49,616
I see our, uh, favorite
sapphic poet is MIA.

844
00:55:49,783 --> 00:55:51,918
I heard the authorities
have been alerted.

845
00:55:52,850 --> 00:55:54,154
Authorities? What authorities?

846
00:55:56,723 --> 00:55:58,625
You seem a little worried, Shriver.

847
00:55:58,792 --> 00:56:00,493
Something you need to tell me?

848
00:56:00,660 --> 00:56:02,950
[chuckles]

849
00:56:03,797 --> 00:56:05,265
You read those?

850
00:56:05,465 --> 00:56:08,368
Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. Sure.
Very nice. They"re, um...

851
00:56:10,700 --> 00:56:11,471
[sighs]
domestic dramas.

852
00:56:11,638 --> 00:56:14,407
You know, women struggling
to find their place.

853
00:56:14,607 --> 00:56:16,420
You seem dismissive.

854
00:56:16,209 --> 00:56:17,977
Oh, no. No, no, no, no.

855
00:56:18,178 --> 00:56:20,800
It"s just that... Well, I mean,

856
00:56:21,810 --> 00:56:23,183
writers like you and me,

857
00:56:24,840 --> 00:56:25,752
I mean,

858
00:56:25,919 --> 00:56:27,921
we"re going for
the big fish, aren"t we?

859
00:56:28,880 --> 00:56:32,392
Dredging the truths
from the murky depths.

860
00:56:33,360 --> 00:56:34,861
Well...
[clears throat]

861
00:56:37,230 --> 00:56:38,932
Hello. Welcome.

862
00:56:39,990 --> 00:56:42,369
I know that, uh,
we"re all happy to be here.

863
00:56:42,535 --> 00:56:44,270
I certainly am.

864
00:56:44,437 --> 00:56:48,208
I"m going to start by introducing
the gentleman on my right,

865
00:56:48,375 --> 00:56:51,978
who would need no introduction if
his face was a little more familiar.

866
00:56:52,145 --> 00:56:53,446
[audience chuckles]

867
00:56:53,646 --> 00:56:55,849
He"s the author of
but one novel...

868
00:56:56,160 --> 00:56:58,685
One great novel.

869
00:56:58,852 --> 00:57:00,553
Ladies and gentlemen, Shriver.

870
00:57:00,720 --> 00:57:03,423
[applause, cheering]

871
00:57:06,426 --> 00:57:09,763
And next, I"d like to introduce
our playwright, Victor Bennet,

872
00:57:09,963 --> 00:57:12,565
who comes to us
from somewhere across the ocean.

873
00:57:12,732 --> 00:57:16,536
We all had the pleasure of
enjoying his hysterically funny

874
00:57:16,703 --> 00:57:21,274
and yet deeply emotional
two-hander last night, right here.

875
00:57:21,441 --> 00:57:22,442
Victor Bennet.

876
00:57:22,542 --> 00:57:23,777
[applause]

877
00:57:23,977 --> 00:57:28,148
The theme for our
panel discussion today is,

878
00:57:28,314 --> 00:57:31,551
are the words
on the page reality

879
00:57:32,786 --> 00:57:33,920
or illusion?

880
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:37,457
Gentlemen?

881
00:57:39,793 --> 00:57:43,263
Is not reality
an illusion anyway?

882
00:57:43,430 --> 00:57:45,765
Here comes the bullshit.[Victor]
Reality/illusion.

883
00:57:45,932 --> 00:57:49,690
That slash implies something
synonymic, does it not?

884
00:57:49,235 --> 00:57:53,600
If I wrote fiction like my colleagues,
I would be a playwright/novelist.

885
00:57:53,173 --> 00:57:56,776
Nobody would argue with that.
Obstetrician/gynecologist.

886
00:57:56,943 --> 00:57:59,379
AC/DC.

887
00:57:59,579 --> 00:58:00,947
[person claps] Yeah!

888
00:58:01,147 --> 00:58:02,515
I see you"ve been jotting down

889
00:58:02,716 --> 00:58:04,918
some of your thoughts there
on your pad, Shriver.

890
00:58:05,850 --> 00:58:08,455
Would you care to enlighten us?

891
00:58:18,665 --> 00:58:21,234
So, last night,
from my hotel room,

892
00:58:21,401 --> 00:58:25,538
I saw this, um,
group of cheerleaders,

893
00:58:25,739 --> 00:58:30,110
young women
dancing and frolicking

894
00:58:30,276 --> 00:58:32,812
like children by a pool.

895
00:58:34,347 --> 00:58:40,286
And then one of these young
women floated up through the air,

896
00:58:42,122 --> 00:58:45,258
gently, like a feather
blown by the breeze.

897
00:58:47,260 --> 00:58:50,630
She had long blond hair
and blue eyes.

898
00:58:51,364 --> 00:58:53,767
And from my window,
I could have reached out

899
00:58:55,101 --> 00:58:56,936
and touched her face.

900
00:59:00,730 --> 00:59:02,709
And beyond
this lovely young woman,

901
00:59:04,511 --> 00:59:10,216
I would not have been able to make out
where the high desert met the night sky,

902
00:59:11,251 --> 00:59:13,386
but for an invisible line...

903
00:59:15,455 --> 00:59:18,692
that stated
where the earth ended

904
00:59:19,459 --> 00:59:21,594
and millions of stars began.

905
00:59:23,596 --> 00:59:25,298
And as all of this was happening

906
00:59:26,466 --> 00:59:29,302
this long,
slow freight train rolled by...

907
00:59:31,971 --> 00:59:37,277
its wheels making that clacking
noise that"s so reassuring.[train chugging]

908
00:59:39,746 --> 00:59:43,750
Right in time as it is
with our own heartbeat.[heart beating]

909
00:59:50,790 --> 00:59:53,193
Or maybe I made it all up.
[chuckles]

910
00:59:53,360 --> 00:59:55,295
[audience laughs]

911
00:59:55,462 --> 00:59:58,164
[laughing][applause]

912
00:59:58,331 --> 01:00:01,201
Well done. Well done.[Victor] Brilliant.

913
01:00:02,936 --> 01:00:04,704
[person whooping]

914
01:00:12,450 --> 01:00:15,810
Hey! Just the man
I was looking for.

915
01:00:15,248 --> 01:00:16,583
Check this out.

916
01:00:16,750 --> 01:00:21,540
Over 100,000 hits,
600 comments and counting.

917
01:00:21,221 --> 01:00:23,923
I need to - go to the bathroom.
- This lady from Toledo...

918
01:00:24,900 --> 01:00:25,191
Mr. Shriver,

919
01:00:25,358 --> 01:00:26,459
I"m Detective Karpas.

920
01:00:27,827 --> 01:00:30,397
Are you in some kind
of trouble, Shriver?

921
01:00:30,597 --> 01:00:31,798
I don"t know.

922
01:00:31,965 --> 01:00:32,966
Please.

923
01:00:37,203 --> 01:00:39,472
[Karpas] I"m reading
your book, Mr. Shriver.

924
01:00:39,639 --> 01:00:41,608
You have an interesting
perspective on life.

925
01:00:41,775 --> 01:00:43,543
Do I? Yeah.

926
01:00:43,710 --> 01:00:45,812
I"d describe it as nihilistic.
Wouldn"t you?

927
01:00:47,180 --> 01:00:49,516
Yeah, - I"m not fond of labels.
- Mm-hmm.

928
01:00:49,683 --> 01:00:50,850
Is that a Cuban?

929
01:00:51,510 --> 01:00:52,485
Oh. Sure is.

930
01:00:53,820 --> 01:00:56,289
You know, your characters,
they have no morals, right?

931
01:00:56,489 --> 01:00:59,726
There"s no goods, no evils.
There"s no God.

932
01:00:59,926 --> 01:01:02,128
Just debauchery and filth

933
01:01:02,295 --> 01:01:03,730
and... and rampant infidelity.

934
01:01:03,930 --> 01:01:06,800
And, uh, well,
murder, of course.

935
01:01:08,234 --> 01:01:10,103
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

936
01:01:10,270 --> 01:01:13,406
I hear you"re the last person
to see Ms. Brown alive.

937
01:01:14,307 --> 01:01:15,675
Wait, she"s dead?

938
01:01:15,842 --> 01:01:17,877
Oh, no,
I didn"t say she was dead.

939
01:01:18,780 --> 01:01:19,846
Why? Is there something
you wanna tell me?

940
01:01:20,130 --> 01:01:22,582
- Is she dead?
- No. No, she"s missing.

941
01:01:22,749 --> 01:01:26,319
But, uh, you know, after 24 hours,
these things rarely turn out well.

942
01:01:27,721 --> 01:01:30,390
[clicks tongue]
The night girl at the hotel says

943
01:01:30,557 --> 01:01:33,560
Ms. Brown left you a little note
earlier in the evening.

944
01:01:35,462 --> 01:01:38,980
Yeah, she wanted to meet me
for a drink at the bar.

945
01:01:39,320 --> 01:01:40,467
That is interesting.

946
01:01:40,633 --> 01:01:42,302
Just "cause I have, uh,

947
01:01:42,469 --> 01:01:45,739
yeah, 400 people who witnessed
you guys arguing that night.

948
01:01:48,174 --> 01:01:50,143
So, did you join her at the bar?

949
01:01:50,310 --> 01:01:52,120
No, I was tired.

950
01:01:52,178 --> 01:01:54,414
Mm-hmm. Not too tired to throw
a shindig in your room, right?

951
01:01:54,447 --> 01:01:57,183
Shriver, - do you need a lawyer?
- I don"t think so.

952
01:02:00,530 --> 01:02:01,321
- Okay.
- Okay.

953
01:02:01,488 --> 01:02:04,357
- See you at the soiree.
- What soiree?

954
01:02:05,225 --> 01:02:06,593
Oh...

955
01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:07,794
He"s fun.

956
01:02:08,928 --> 01:02:10,797
Listen, I...
I"ve been digging up your past,

957
01:02:10,997 --> 01:02:14,934
and it"s just some stuff
doesn"t exactly add up.

958
01:02:15,135 --> 01:02:17,437
Wouldn"t happen to know where
your ex-wife is, would you?

959
01:02:19,606 --> 01:02:22,575
- No.
- Okay.

960
01:02:22,742 --> 01:02:24,778
Hey, I"ll let you know
if I find anything, huh?

961
01:02:28,782 --> 01:02:29,916
****.

962
01:02:31,170 --> 01:02:32,118
[imaginary Shriver] Oh, boy.

963
01:02:32,252 --> 01:02:33,319
****.

964
01:02:33,486 --> 01:02:34,621
He thinks you killed her.

965
01:02:34,788 --> 01:02:35,922
Killed who?

966
01:02:36,890 --> 01:02:38,491
The poet, of course.

967
01:02:38,658 --> 01:02:40,160
Maybe your wife too.

968
01:02:40,894 --> 01:02:42,280
I... I didn"t.

969
01:02:42,195 --> 01:02:44,300
You know, it"s, uh, interesting,

970
01:02:44,197 --> 01:02:46,700
the parallels between your life

971
01:02:46,900 --> 01:02:49,602
and the protagonist
in Shriver"s book.

972
01:02:49,769 --> 01:02:50,770
Don"t you think?

973
01:02:50,904 --> 01:02:52,505
[laughs]
Yeah, all right.

974
01:02:52,672 --> 01:02:55,108
Just leave me alone so
I can think, all right?

975
01:02:55,642 --> 01:02:56,910
Shriver.

976
01:02:57,811 --> 01:02:59,979
- Oh, sorry.
- Come on.

977
01:03:00,180 --> 01:03:03,830
So, I"m gonna run some errands, and
then we"ll stop by my house and change.

978
01:03:08,655 --> 01:03:10,423
[exhales] How about me?
I look like a bum.

979
01:03:10,623 --> 01:03:14,194
Oh, you"re the writer. You"re
allowed to be who you are.

980
01:03:15,228 --> 01:03:17,970
And what about you?
You"re a writer too.

981
01:03:18,531 --> 01:03:20,800
People don"t see me that way
around here.

982
01:03:25,105 --> 01:03:26,539
I hate this party.

983
01:03:26,706 --> 01:03:28,740
I wish we could just skip it.

984
01:03:28,241 --> 01:03:30,143
- Let"s skip it.
- No, we can"t.

985
01:03:30,310 --> 01:03:31,945
- Why not?
- Because.

986
01:03:32,112 --> 01:03:34,681
Dr. Bedrosian"s the key
benefactor for the festival.

987
01:03:34,848 --> 01:03:36,983
This is the night
that we go to her house,

988
01:03:37,150 --> 01:03:40,320
we make her feel very important.

989
01:03:43,423 --> 01:03:44,858
More precisely,

990
01:03:45,250 --> 01:03:49,529
you are going to make her
feel really important.

991
01:03:50,597 --> 01:03:52,832
It"s called singing
for your supper.

992
01:03:53,600 --> 01:03:55,301
I see.

993
01:03:55,468 --> 01:03:58,538
I mean, to be clear,
you don"t have to sing

994
01:03:58,705 --> 01:04:02,876
every tune
Dr. Bedrosian asks you to sing.

995
01:04:03,430 --> 01:04:04,210
You know what I mean.

996
01:04:04,411 --> 01:04:06,880
What does Dr. Bedrosian teach?

997
01:04:07,470 --> 01:04:09,150
Oh, she"s not at the university.

998
01:04:09,182 --> 01:04:11,484
She"s a local gynecologist.

999
01:04:12,152 --> 01:04:13,153
Huh.

1000
01:04:19,659 --> 01:04:22,896
[chuckles]
You did not buy those.

1001
01:04:24,631 --> 01:04:26,299
I wanna get you
to sign "em for me.

1002
01:04:26,466 --> 01:04:29,869
I could have given you a copy.
I have boxes of them.

1003
01:04:30,360 --> 01:04:31,771
Really?[softly] Yeah.

1004
01:04:31,938 --> 01:04:33,673
Your books,
they should be out in the world,

1005
01:04:33,807 --> 01:04:35,909
because what I"ve read
so far is, uh...

1006
01:04:37,344 --> 01:04:39,312
It"s truly extraordinary.

1007
01:04:40,113 --> 01:04:41,648
I had lots of dreams.

1008
01:04:43,516 --> 01:04:46,190
But then I, you know,

1009
01:04:46,920 --> 01:04:48,688
had to deal with reality.

1010
01:04:50,490 --> 01:04:51,958
People try to give me advice:

1011
01:04:52,125 --> 01:04:54,494
get online, get a website,

1012
01:04:55,328 --> 01:04:56,663
build a platform.

1013
01:04:58,231 --> 01:05:00,300
They say it"s more important
than the actual writing.

1014
01:05:00,367 --> 01:05:02,102
How cynical is that?

1015
01:05:02,268 --> 01:05:05,372
You know, then there"s... you.

1016
01:05:05,538 --> 01:05:07,674
You"re nowhere to be found.

1017
01:05:07,841 --> 01:05:11,244
You practically deny that you"re
the author of your own book.

1018
01:05:11,411 --> 01:05:15,382
You play little mind games every time
someone asks you a straight question.

1019
01:05:15,548 --> 01:05:20,653
And you, more than anyone, have
let your work speak for itself.

1020
01:05:20,820 --> 01:05:25,558
I let my work speak for itself
and no one listens.

1021
01:05:29,295 --> 01:05:31,531
I, uh, should finish.
We"re gonna be late.

1022
01:05:36,236 --> 01:05:37,504
I"ll make you a deal.

1023
01:05:39,105 --> 01:05:42,742
You read me some of Goat Time...
My own private reading,

1024
01:05:42,942 --> 01:05:45,578
and I"ll sign your books.

1025
01:05:48,548 --> 01:05:49,616
Hmm.

1026
01:05:52,552 --> 01:05:54,521
Well,
what do you want me to read?

1027
01:05:54,688 --> 01:05:56,523
Just any of the pages
that I dog-eared.

1028
01:05:56,690 --> 01:05:57,824
Out loud?

1029
01:05:57,991 --> 01:05:59,759
No, silently.

1030
01:05:59,959 --> 01:06:01,327
Yes, out loud.

1031
01:06:16,910 --> 01:06:18,778
"In the days, then weeks,

1032
01:06:18,978 --> 01:06:22,150
then months
following my wife"s departure,

1033
01:06:23,616 --> 01:06:25,885
I kept expecting
to feel something.

1034
01:06:28,121 --> 01:06:29,556
Yet I felt nothing.

1035
01:06:29,723 --> 01:06:32,920
No grief, no loss, no sadness.

1036
01:06:33,727 --> 01:06:36,796
I experienced only weariness

1037
01:06:36,996 --> 01:06:42,102
as if I were hoisting a heavy bucket
from a well of infinite depth.

1038
01:06:43,470 --> 01:06:44,637
[sniffs]

1039
01:06:44,804 --> 01:06:48,241
Then one day,
as I was taking the bus,

1040
01:06:48,441 --> 01:06:52,178
heading downtown to meet
Franz for lunch, I saw a man.

1041
01:06:53,613 --> 01:06:57,817
He was about my age, my height,
wearing a long tweed overcoat

1042
01:06:58,818 --> 01:07:01,688
exactly like the one

1043
01:07:01,888 --> 01:07:05,580
I had left behind at a rail
station many years ago.

1044
01:07:07,627 --> 01:07:10,597
That long-ago day had begun
with a wintry chill

1045
01:07:10,764 --> 01:07:15,502
that blossomed into warmth
as the noon hour approached.

1046
01:07:15,668 --> 01:07:18,972
I removed the coat and folded
it on the bench beside me.

1047
01:07:20,400 --> 01:07:23,810
Then I dozed, dreaming, I think,

1048
01:07:23,977 --> 01:07:26,946
and woke to the final call
for my train.

1049
01:07:27,113 --> 01:07:30,500
I stood and ran,
leaving the coat behind.

1050
01:07:30,216 --> 01:07:34,621
It was over a year, the following
winter, before I realized it was missing.

1051
01:07:36,489 --> 01:07:39,292
The more I examined
the man"s coat,

1052
01:07:40,527 --> 01:07:43,730
the more convinced I became
that it had been mine.

1053
01:07:45,398 --> 01:07:47,934
Why was he wearing it?
It was April.

1054
01:07:48,101 --> 01:07:50,537
I, myself, was wearing
only a light jacket.

1055
01:07:52,238 --> 01:07:55,408
When the bus came to my stop,
he got off.

1056
01:07:55,575 --> 01:07:57,277
I decided to follow him.

1057
01:07:57,444 --> 01:08:01,181
He crossed Seventh Avenue and
began walking on 21st Street.

1058
01:08:01,381 --> 01:08:04,718
He stopped for a moment
at a newsstand

1059
01:08:04,884 --> 01:08:07,520
and read the headlines
on some of the tabloids.

1060
01:08:07,687 --> 01:08:09,220
He checked his watch.

1061
01:08:09,189 --> 01:08:10,724
I checked mine.

1062
01:08:10,890 --> 01:08:13,126
I followed the man
for a few hundred feet

1063
01:08:13,293 --> 01:08:15,995
and saw him enter
the very same café

1064
01:08:16,162 --> 01:08:19,165
where I had arranged
to meet Franz.

1065
01:08:19,332 --> 01:08:24,471
I watched him through the window as
he squeezed between several tables

1066
01:08:24,637 --> 01:08:27,400
and then,
to my shock and amazement,

1067
01:08:27,974 --> 01:08:30,143
stopped and greeted Franz.

1068
01:08:31,611 --> 01:08:33,880
The two men hugged,

1069
01:08:34,470 --> 01:08:36,316
and then he sat
across from Franz

1070
01:08:36,483 --> 01:08:40,860
as if he had been the one
with the lunch date.

1071
01:08:40,286 --> 01:08:42,880
I stood watching them
consume their meal.

1072
01:08:42,288 --> 01:08:45,625
The man had an omelet while
Franz chose the salad Niçoise,

1073
01:08:45,792 --> 01:08:48,328
along with a bottle
of my favorite Sancerre.

1074
01:08:52,232 --> 01:08:55,368
I hated this stranger
out in the world,

1075
01:08:57,700 --> 01:08:58,471
living my life,

1076
01:08:59,873 --> 01:09:02,676
eating my lunch,
breathing my oxygen.

1077
01:09:05,779 --> 01:09:10,216
A time would come when circumstances
would force me to confront him.

1078
01:09:11,818 --> 01:09:14,254
I walked all the way home."

1079
01:09:26,766 --> 01:09:27,801
Mmm.

1080
01:09:28,401 --> 01:09:30,904
[mouthing words]

1081
01:09:31,710 --> 01:09:32,238
Sorry. I just...

1082
01:09:37,243 --> 01:09:38,244
You look nice.

1083
01:09:40,513 --> 01:09:42,716
Nice? That...
That"s all you... you got?

1084
01:09:42,916 --> 01:09:44,851
Oh, no, no.
I meant, uh, great.

1085
01:09:45,180 --> 01:09:48,688
Thank you. [chuckles] And, you
know, spectacular. Uh, stellar.

1086
01:09:48,855 --> 01:09:50,123
Yeah?

1087
01:09:50,290 --> 01:09:52,392
Do we really have to
go to this party?

1088
01:09:53,159 --> 01:09:54,861
- Yes.
- Okay.

1089
01:09:55,595 --> 01:09:56,596
Oh, my purse.

1090
01:10:01,534 --> 01:10:04,237
Oh, hey. Yeah, you promised.

1091
01:10:04,404 --> 01:10:06,406
You gotta sign the book.

1092
01:10:08,875 --> 01:10:12,579
Um, why don"t we do that
after the party?

1093
01:10:14,814 --> 01:10:17,117
- Yeah, that"s good. Yeah.
- Yeah.

1094
01:10:17,884 --> 01:10:19,853
[guests chattering]

1095
01:10:28,895 --> 01:10:30,630
[Simone] Okay.

1096
01:10:30,263 --> 01:10:32,599
[sighs]
Bourbon, if you don"t mind.

1097
01:10:35,702 --> 01:10:37,137
Can we go now?

1098
01:10:37,303 --> 01:10:40,173
Okay, here she comes.
Just humor her.

1099
01:10:40,340 --> 01:10:42,409
- Hello, Simone.
- Hi.

1100
01:10:43,176 --> 01:10:45,745
Ah. Mr. Shriver.

1101
01:10:45,912 --> 01:10:48,214
It"s quite an honor
to have you here

1102
01:10:48,415 --> 01:10:50,283
in my not-so-humble abode.

1103
01:10:50,450 --> 01:10:51,885
Thank you.

1104
01:10:52,520 --> 01:10:54,421
I do hope you"ll be
comfortable here.

1105
01:10:54,587 --> 01:10:57,791
You know, I try to maintain
a level of urban sophistication

1106
01:10:57,991 --> 01:10:59,759
in this cultural wasteland.

1107
01:10:59,926 --> 01:11:01,728
Yeah, I can see that.

1108
01:11:01,895 --> 01:11:04,798
You know, I just think it"s
important to... to set an example.

1109
01:11:04,998 --> 01:11:08,501
And having you here
is a big part of that.

1110
01:11:08,668 --> 01:11:11,237
It"s worth every penny
of my donation.

1111
01:11:12,380 --> 01:11:13,473
Now, you see, I"m... [sighs]

1112
01:11:13,640 --> 01:11:15,942
I don"t know,
kind of a nut for literature.

1113
01:11:16,743 --> 01:11:17,911
Who"s that guy?

1114
01:11:18,780 --> 01:11:20,380
I have no idea.
Come and see my library.

1115
01:11:29,956 --> 01:11:32,459
This does not
appear to be a library.

1116
01:11:32,625 --> 01:11:35,610
Yes, but this is
where I do my best work.

1117
01:11:37,130 --> 01:11:38,698
Here it is.

1118
01:11:38,898 --> 01:11:41,201
First edition, mint condition.

1119
01:11:42,469 --> 01:11:45,839
I don"t have to tell you,
I paid a fortune for this.

1120
01:11:46,600 --> 01:11:50,110
Is there anything that I could
do to get you to sign it for me?

1121
01:11:50,276 --> 01:11:51,378
[Delta] Are you a writer?

1122
01:11:54,114 --> 01:11:55,548
I know who you are.

1123
01:11:55,715 --> 01:11:56,850
[grunts]

1124
01:11:58,918 --> 01:12:00,220
Anything at all?

1125
01:12:02,589 --> 01:12:03,590
A pen.

1126
01:12:04,691 --> 01:12:05,825
Pen.

1127
01:12:05,992 --> 01:12:07,527
I think I need to
go to the bathroom.

1128
01:12:08,561 --> 01:12:09,562
Jesus.

1129
01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:23,877
[phone rings]

1130
01:12:24,440 --> 01:12:25,445
Hey, hey.

1131
01:12:26,946 --> 01:12:29,416
Shriver residence. Jeeves here.

1132
01:12:29,582 --> 01:12:30,717
[Shriver] Lenny, it"s me.

1133
01:12:30,884 --> 01:12:32,752
What"s the prize?

1134
01:12:32,952 --> 01:12:34,954
I think I "m Shriver. Yeah,
you" re Shriver. What? So?

1135
01:12:34,988 --> 01:12:38,491
No, the Shriver.
It"s nuts, but it all fits.

1136
01:12:38,692 --> 01:12:41,261
I"m remembering his life.
My life.

1137
01:12:41,428 --> 01:12:46,199
I... What have you been smoking out there?
I mean, that is crazy.

1138
01:12:47,434 --> 01:12:48,968
Is everything okay in there?

1139
01:12:49,736 --> 01:12:51,338
Yeah, I"m fine.

1140
01:12:52,472 --> 01:12:54,207
- [Lenny] What?
- It all makes sense now.

1141
01:12:54,407 --> 01:12:56,843
I"m not an impostor.
I wrote Goat Time.

1142
01:12:57,100 --> 01:12:58,912
It"s all inside me.

1143
01:12:59,790 --> 01:13:02,480
Forgetting that you wrote a
book and being a famous person?

1144
01:13:02,215 --> 01:13:04,484
I don"t know. Really?

1145
01:13:04,651 --> 01:13:06,886
Writing that book
cost me everything.

1146
01:13:07,530 --> 01:13:09,550
And I... If I could forget that,

1147
01:13:09,222 --> 01:13:12,726
do you think it"s possible I
could forget committing a murder?

1148
01:13:14,940 --> 01:13:16,963
Uh, you"re just
talking hypothetical, right?

1149
01:13:17,163 --> 01:13:20,600
I... I don"t know.
All I know is I"m Shriver.

1150
01:13:21,601 --> 01:13:23,203
And I might be in trouble.

1151
01:13:25,380 --> 01:13:27,474
Okay. [chuckles]
Sure.

1152
01:13:27,640 --> 01:13:30,760
No, I"m Shriver.

1153
01:13:33,313 --> 01:13:35,480
I am the Shriver.

1154
01:13:35,810 --> 01:13:37,250
All right, all right.
Take a pill, man.

1155
01:13:37,417 --> 01:13:38,785
I"m Shriver!

1156
01:13:39,652 --> 01:13:40,687
Hello?

1157
01:13:42,155 --> 01:13:44,958
Oh, I was beginning
to worry about you.

1158
01:13:47,930 --> 01:13:48,328
Sorry.

1159
01:14:02,609 --> 01:14:03,877
[grunts]

1160
01:14:04,244 --> 01:14:07,447
Yes, yes, come on, - you literary lion!
- You!

1161
01:14:07,614 --> 01:14:08,648
What?

1162
01:14:08,815 --> 01:14:10,183
Trust me doctor,

1163
01:14:10,350 --> 01:14:13,687
this is one face
not worthy of your wall of fame.

1164
01:14:13,887 --> 01:14:15,321
Simone. [grunts]

1165
01:14:15,488 --> 01:14:16,322
I gotta go.

1166
01:14:18,458 --> 01:14:19,793
You forgot my novel.

1167
01:14:22,896 --> 01:14:25,310
Simone. Simone!

1168
01:14:27,701 --> 01:14:29,569
[sighs]

1169
01:14:47,654 --> 01:14:49,322
[Simone]
There has to be something.

1170
01:14:49,489 --> 01:14:51,224
Just like, any room.

1171
01:14:52,792 --> 01:14:54,527
Simone?

1172
01:14:54,728 --> 01:14:56,162
Oh. [chuckles]
That"s me.

1173
01:14:56,329 --> 01:14:57,630
Who the **** are you?

1174
01:14:58,765 --> 01:15:00,467
- I"m Shriver.
- You know, I"ve been wondering

1175
01:15:00,500 --> 01:15:03,690
why you"ve been acting
so evasive since you arrived,

1176
01:15:03,236 --> 01:15:05,405
and someone just showed up
and gave me the answer.

1177
01:15:05,605 --> 01:15:08,410
So, you"re not mad
about the gynecologist?

1178
01:15:08,208 --> 01:15:09,342
Oh, please.

1179
01:15:09,509 --> 01:15:11,678
That"s a relief.
But, Simone...

1180
01:15:11,845 --> 01:15:14,848
No, no, no, no. Don"t
"Simone" me, whoever you are.

1181
01:15:15,480 --> 01:15:19,519
I mean, can you honestly tell me that you
haven"t been lying to me since you got here?

1182
01:15:22,288 --> 01:15:24,724
Well, that"s
a complicated question.

1183
01:15:24,924 --> 01:15:26,726
Well, technically,
I"ve been lying.

1184
01:15:26,926 --> 01:15:27,961
[door opens]

1185
01:15:28,128 --> 01:15:30,263
But it turns out
the lies are true.

1186
01:15:31,431 --> 01:15:32,699
Oh, my God.

1187
01:15:32,866 --> 01:15:34,734
This place is disgusting, Simone.

1188
01:15:34,934 --> 01:15:36,436
There"s not even
paper towels in there.

1189
01:15:36,569 --> 01:15:37,871
Who is this guy?

1190
01:15:38,710 --> 01:15:39,105
I"m Shriver.

1191
01:15:39,272 --> 01:15:41,700
Oh! There he is.

1192
01:15:41,207 --> 01:15:43,643
The man of the hour.
My doppelgaänger.

1193
01:15:43,810 --> 01:15:46,120
You, sir,
have caused me quite a headache.

1194
01:15:46,212 --> 01:15:47,947
I was at a beautiful ashram,

1195
01:15:48,114 --> 01:15:52,852
and I was about this close to
achieving pure bliss and happiness

1196
01:15:53,190 --> 01:15:54,587
- when I got a phone call.
- Look, buddy,

1197
01:15:54,587 --> 01:15:55,889
I don"t know
who you think you are,

1198
01:15:55,889 --> 01:15:57,157
but Mr. Shriver is over here.

1199
01:15:57,323 --> 01:15:59,225
No, he definitely isn"t.

1200
01:15:59,392 --> 01:16:01,728
And I think you need to crawl
back to wherever you came from

1201
01:16:01,861 --> 01:16:04,831
because you"re upsetting this
particularly beautiful lady right here.

1202
01:16:04,998 --> 01:16:07,534
You stay away from her,
you impostor.

1203
01:16:07,701 --> 01:16:09,836
Impostor? You, my
friend, are the impostor.

1204
01:16:10,300 --> 01:16:13,540
Yeah, how can you prove
that you"re the real Shriver?

1205
01:16:13,707 --> 01:16:17,110
Why don"t you look at my driver"s
license or any of my credit cards?

1206
01:16:17,277 --> 01:16:19,546
Here is my National Book Award.

1207
01:16:19,713 --> 01:16:22,115
This is, uh,
an invitation from the Clintons

1208
01:16:22,282 --> 01:16:25,510
to get the National Prize
for Humanitarianism.

1209
01:16:25,218 --> 01:16:26,886
Bill"s a personal friend.

1210
01:16:30,457 --> 01:16:33,126
Okay.
Yeah, it"s pretty convincing.

1211
01:16:33,293 --> 01:16:35,762
You just carry this around - with you?
- Yes, I do.

1212
01:16:37,564 --> 01:16:40,734
To think
I was actually beginning...

1213
01:16:45,472 --> 01:16:46,473
Simone.

1214
01:16:46,606 --> 01:16:47,774
[real Shriver] Thank you.

1215
01:16:48,341 --> 01:16:49,776
Hmm.

1216
01:16:49,943 --> 01:16:51,644
You"re welcome to
come hear me read

1217
01:16:51,811 --> 01:16:54,647
if you can
stomach the humiliation.

1218
01:16:54,814 --> 01:16:56,816
- [Simone] Excuse me.
- Where are you going?

1219
01:16:58,818 --> 01:16:59,886
[scoffs]

1220
01:17:04,224 --> 01:17:05,759
Shriver, who is that guy?

1221
01:17:08,495 --> 01:17:10,330
He"s me, I guess.

1222
01:17:15,468 --> 01:17:16,770
It"s okay.

1223
01:17:28,214 --> 01:17:30,950
That other Shriver is
probably with her right now.

1224
01:17:33,420 --> 01:17:36,523
She"s kissing him,
saying, "Oh, Shriver."

1225
01:17:36,690 --> 01:17:38,558
[chuckles]
Shut up. She"s not.

1226
01:17:38,725 --> 01:17:41,428
I think she has
a weakness for writers.

1227
01:17:42,262 --> 01:17:43,363
Yeah.

1228
01:17:43,530 --> 01:17:45,799
I mean, who wouldn"t?
Of course.

1229
01:17:45,965 --> 01:17:48,835
You forget, Mr. Shriver,
that I knew Ms. Cleary

1230
01:17:49,200 --> 01:17:52,372
way back
when she was Simone Wasserman.

1231
01:17:54,741 --> 01:17:57,310
Oh, wow.

1232
01:17:57,510 --> 01:17:58,978
You didn"t know.

1233
01:18:06,419 --> 01:18:08,888
So, he"s the one
who broke her heart.

1234
01:18:09,890 --> 01:18:13,827
No. She chucked him like a
stinky old shoe years ago.

1235
01:18:13,993 --> 01:18:15,395
Ah...

1236
01:18:15,562 --> 01:18:17,300
[sighs]

1237
01:18:17,197 --> 01:18:19,833
He wasn"t always the
pickled poet you see today.

1238
01:18:19,999 --> 01:18:22,335
He was her teacher.
Well, her mentor.

1239
01:18:22,535 --> 01:18:25,572
That was until she clearly
surpassed him in every way.

1240
01:18:26,873 --> 01:18:30,477
People started paying attention,
and he couldn"t deal.

1241
01:18:30,677 --> 01:18:32,412
He undermined her confidence

1242
01:18:32,579 --> 01:18:35,749
and dragged her down
every chance he got.

1243
01:18:35,915 --> 01:18:38,351
It"s crazy because
I recognized her

1244
01:18:38,551 --> 01:18:42,856
in this article that I was reading about
impostor syndrome in high-achieving women.

1245
01:18:43,230 --> 01:18:45,291
Now, you wouldn"t get this
"cause you"re a man,

1246
01:18:46,760 --> 01:18:48,695
but, basically,
she believed his bullshit,

1247
01:18:48,862 --> 01:18:50,663
and she lost her confidence.

1248
01:18:50,864 --> 01:18:55,680
But eventually, she got the courage
to give him the old heave-ho.

1249
01:18:58,471 --> 01:19:00,507
And he has been spending
the last five years

1250
01:19:00,674 --> 01:19:03,143
desperately
trying to make amends.

1251
01:19:03,309 --> 01:19:05,178
And that and drinking.

1252
01:19:05,345 --> 01:19:07,180
- [Karpas] There you are.
- Oh, Jesus.

1253
01:19:07,347 --> 01:19:08,748
What?

1254
01:19:08,915 --> 01:19:11,840
I have been looking
all over for you, Shriver.

1255
01:19:13,486 --> 01:19:15,488
What"s new, Detective?

1256
01:19:15,655 --> 01:19:19,392
Well, I had a nice chat with,
uh, one of the cheerleaders

1257
01:19:19,592 --> 01:19:21,695
in town for the competition
earlier tonight.

1258
01:19:21,895 --> 01:19:24,898
Uh, Sophie something.
She"s a lovely girl.

1259
01:19:25,650 --> 01:19:26,833
- Beautiful young lady.
- Yeah.

1260
01:19:27,330 --> 01:19:29,135
You know,
if I ever have a daughter,

1261
01:19:29,335 --> 01:19:32,706
she"s exactly what I imagined
she"d be like at that age.

1262
01:19:32,906 --> 01:19:35,809
Anyway, she said she saw Ms. Brown
in your room late that night.

1263
01:19:37,944 --> 01:19:40,800
She said she saw Ms. Brown?

1264
01:19:41,648 --> 01:19:43,249
She was, uh...

1265
01:19:43,416 --> 01:19:45,652
Yeah, she was... she was
performing an aerial flip.

1266
01:19:45,819 --> 01:19:48,688
Pretty much as you
described it earlier today.

1267
01:19:48,855 --> 01:19:51,424
She said Ms. Brown
was passed out on your bed.

1268
01:19:53,930 --> 01:19:55,295
I have no recollection of that.

1269
01:19:56,429 --> 01:19:58,832
You"re the last known
sighting of our poet.

1270
01:20:00,100 --> 01:20:01,568
Excuse me. I"m sorry,

1271
01:20:01,735 --> 01:20:03,737
are you trying to insinuate
that Mr. Shriver had any...

1272
01:20:03,737 --> 01:20:05,238
Everyone"s a suspect.

1273
01:20:05,972 --> 01:20:07,700
Everyone.

1274
01:20:07,674 --> 01:20:08,975
Okay.

1275
01:20:09,142 --> 01:20:11,277
Well, then are you
investigating the impostor

1276
01:20:11,444 --> 01:20:14,280
that is running around here
pretending to be our Shriver?

1277
01:20:14,447 --> 01:20:17,450
Impostor? - Okay.
- Yeah.

1278
01:20:17,617 --> 01:20:19,686
And while you"re in
your little notebook... Uh-huh.

1279
01:20:19,853 --> 01:20:24,391
Also take note that Ms. Brown had
left the room while I was in there.

1280
01:20:27,427 --> 01:20:28,695
[inhales]

1281
01:20:29,729 --> 01:20:31,431
Sophie didn"t mention
seeing you there.

1282
01:20:31,598 --> 01:20:33,867
Yeah, well,
I must have been in the can.

1283
01:20:37,370 --> 01:20:38,104
I see.

1284
01:20:41,608 --> 01:20:43,476
- [Karpas] Hmm.
- Hey, Detective.

1285
01:20:43,643 --> 01:20:46,312
Didn"t you say you were trying
to track down my ex-wife?

1286
01:20:46,479 --> 01:20:48,181
Yeah. Yeah,
that is an interesting case.

1287
01:20:48,348 --> 01:20:51,170
But I believe
the answers are out there.

1288
01:20:51,184 --> 01:20:53,153
Hey, some might be in here.

1289
01:21:01,628 --> 01:21:02,729
[exhales sharply]

1290
01:21:03,897 --> 01:21:05,650
[chuckles]

1291
01:21:06,299 --> 01:21:07,901
Wow.

1292
01:21:08,680 --> 01:21:13,673
This is probably the best
festival I"ve ever been to.

1293
01:21:13,873 --> 01:21:15,308
This shit is wild!

1294
01:21:42,669 --> 01:21:43,670
Hi.

1295
01:21:43,803 --> 01:21:45,380
Hi.

1296
01:21:47,107 --> 01:21:50,243
Uh, I locked my key
in my room, so...

1297
01:21:50,844 --> 01:21:51,978
Oh.

1298
01:21:52,145 --> 01:21:53,146
Sorry.

1299
01:21:53,813 --> 01:21:55,215
You look stressed.

1300
01:21:55,382 --> 01:21:58,685
Things are going poorly for me.

1301
01:21:58,852 --> 01:22:00,954
They say you"re a famous writer
named Shriver.

1302
01:22:02,555 --> 01:22:05,258
There seems to be
some disagreement about that.

1303
01:22:06,826 --> 01:22:08,610
I"m gonna cheer for you.

1304
01:22:10,497 --> 01:22:12,665
♪ Shriver, Shriver
Ready to write ♪

1305
01:22:12,832 --> 01:22:14,667
♪ Get on out there
Fight, fight, fight ♪

1306
01:22:14,834 --> 01:22:16,870
♪ The pen is mightier
Than the sword, they say ♪

1307
01:22:17,700 --> 01:22:19,272
♪ So you can crush them
Any day ♪

1308
01:22:22,876 --> 01:22:24,144
Does that help people?

1309
01:22:24,310 --> 01:22:25,545
Seems to.

1310
01:22:29,249 --> 01:22:31,184
- Finals are today.
- Good luck.

1311
01:22:31,384 --> 01:22:32,852
Don"t need it.

1312
01:22:36,220 --> 01:22:37,957
Hey, excuse me. I, uh...

1313
01:22:38,124 --> 01:22:40,994
I need a key for my room.
I got locked out of my room yesterday.

1314
01:22:41,161 --> 01:22:42,462
Um...

1315
01:22:43,763 --> 01:22:45,165
I don"t seem to have one.

1316
01:22:46,766 --> 01:22:49,269
What about the maid?
Does the maid have one?

1317
01:22:49,436 --> 01:22:52,500
Why don"t you go grab some
breakfast while I go find her?

1318
01:22:52,639 --> 01:22:53,740
Hmm.

1319
01:22:53,907 --> 01:22:56,643
Oh, wait.
She"s out sick today.

1320
01:22:56,843 --> 01:22:58,778
She... You...

1321
01:22:58,978 --> 01:23:00,747
What do you mean?
What kind of hotel is this?

1322
01:23:00,914 --> 01:23:02,449
You got one maid
for the whole place?

1323
01:23:02,615 --> 01:23:04,884
Yeah. She"s really fast.

1324
01:23:05,510 --> 01:23:07,187
Who is this guy?

1325
01:23:07,354 --> 01:23:09,422
He"s me, apparently.

1326
01:23:10,490 --> 01:23:11,991
What? Okay,

1327
01:23:12,158 --> 01:23:16,363
I heard that you explored
Dr. Bedrosian"s library.

1328
01:23:17,731 --> 01:23:19,432
I swear to God,
I didn"t do anything.

1329
01:23:19,599 --> 01:23:21,768
- Really? You"d be the first.
- Yeah.

1330
01:23:24,571 --> 01:23:26,206
Uh-oh.

1331
01:23:26,373 --> 01:23:28,410
Oh, don"t... don"t say I"m here.

1332
01:23:30,243 --> 01:23:33,460
Teresa. Have you seen him?

1333
01:23:33,213 --> 01:23:34,881
Seen who?[Simone] You know who.

1334
01:23:35,480 --> 01:23:36,816
I"ll bet you
that"s his porridge.

1335
01:23:38,184 --> 01:23:40,186
Well, is... is it his?

1336
01:23:40,353 --> 01:23:41,521
He left.

1337
01:23:45,458 --> 01:23:48,628
The lady from the college says you have
to be out of your room by checkout time.

1338
01:23:48,795 --> 01:23:50,630
When"s checkout time?

1339
01:23:50,230 --> 01:23:51,698
Half an hour ago.

1340
01:23:51,898 --> 01:23:53,733
We"re gonna have to
charge you for an extra day.

1341
01:23:53,767 --> 01:23:54,968
May I have a credit card?

1342
01:23:56,136 --> 01:23:57,837
[door opens][Teresa] All right,

1343
01:23:58,380 --> 01:24:00,974
you can stay at my place
just until we find the key.

1344
01:24:01,141 --> 01:24:02,976
- Oh, damn.
- It"s not that bad.

1345
01:24:03,143 --> 01:24:04,277
Not that.

1346
01:24:04,477 --> 01:24:07,480
You made my month, friend.

1347
01:24:07,647 --> 01:24:11,518
You have given me
the literary story of the year.

1348
01:24:11,685 --> 01:24:16,656
An impostor shows up pretending
to be the reclusive author.

1349
01:24:16,823 --> 01:24:20,427
My story forces the real
author out of hiding.

1350
01:24:20,593 --> 01:24:23,730
I mean, this is just
unbelievably ironic.

1351
01:24:23,930 --> 01:24:25,498
I"m gonna sell it
to The New Yorker.

1352
01:24:27,367 --> 01:24:29,369
All right, let"s go.

1353
01:24:29,536 --> 01:24:30,537
Sorry.

1354
01:24:33,707 --> 01:24:35,875
[knocks on door]
Are you good in there?

1355
01:24:37,100 --> 01:24:38,545
I"m fine.

1356
01:24:38,712 --> 01:24:40,280
[doorbell rings]

1357
01:24:41,614 --> 01:24:43,683
[T.] All right, where is he?[door closes]

1358
01:24:45,452 --> 01:24:46,953
Shriver![knocks on door]

1359
01:24:47,120 --> 01:24:48,455
Shriver!

1360
01:24:48,621 --> 01:24:49,989
Shriver.

1361
01:24:52,625 --> 01:24:54,270
Shriver![grunts]

1362
01:24:54,194 --> 01:24:56,863
Shriver! What are you
gonna do about this?

1363
01:24:58,198 --> 01:24:59,532
I need a towel.

1364
01:25:01,835 --> 01:25:06,390
This is one of the great
literary hoaxes of all time.

1365
01:25:06,206 --> 01:25:09,275
We have a brazen impostor
in our midst.

1366
01:25:09,442 --> 01:25:11,211
Well, are you talking about
me or him?

1367
01:25:11,411 --> 01:25:14,748
When I first heard about the
charlatan, I so wanted to believe him.

1368
01:25:15,849 --> 01:25:18,785
Okay, I...
I doubted you for a moment.

1369
01:25:20,286 --> 01:25:21,988
I was jealous.

1370
01:25:22,155 --> 01:25:24,657
I could see my ex-wife was
falling in love with you.

1371
01:25:25,492 --> 01:25:27,160
- Love?
- Never in my days

1372
01:25:27,327 --> 01:25:29,496
have I seen a writer,
a real writer,

1373
01:25:29,662 --> 01:25:33,199
who didn"t walk around thinking his
shit didn"t smell like eau de cologne.

1374
01:25:33,366 --> 01:25:35,350
But you, Shriver...
[chuckles]

1375
01:25:35,201 --> 01:25:37,670
You walk around like
an insecure grad student,

1376
01:25:37,871 --> 01:25:39,673
waiting for someone
to come up and say,

1377
01:25:39,873 --> 01:25:43,677
"Okay, time to hang up the pen.
Start mongering fish for a living."

1378
01:25:45,879 --> 01:25:47,113
What happened to you?

1379
01:25:49,820 --> 01:25:50,650
I have theories.

1380
01:25:51,251 --> 01:25:52,485
Me too.

1381
01:25:52,652 --> 01:25:55,121
You"re crazy. [laughs]

1382
01:25:55,321 --> 01:25:57,891
You know how I know that?
"Cause I" m crazy too.

1383
01:25:58,580 --> 01:26:00,460
I"m just not crazy enough
to believe for a moment

1384
01:26:00,627 --> 01:26:03,290
that you aren"t
the author of Goat Time.

1385
01:26:03,196 --> 01:26:06,199
Now, get your *** out of there.
Come on.

1386
01:26:06,366 --> 01:26:10,704
In 15 minutes, that fraud is gonna
be feted by the university president.

1387
01:26:10,904 --> 01:26:13,206
Then he"s going to be escorted
over to the auditorium,

1388
01:26:13,373 --> 01:26:18,111
where he"s gonna read from
your book and claim your prize.

1389
01:26:18,278 --> 01:26:20,460
And, no, it"s not a car.

1390
01:26:20,213 --> 01:26:22,582
It"s a crappy plaque.

1391
01:26:34,928 --> 01:26:35,929
We"re off.

1392
01:26:37,697 --> 01:26:40,660
- Where"s Teresa?
- Oh. [chuckles]

1393
01:26:40,233 --> 01:26:42,802
She went over to straighten out
your situation at the hotel.

1394
01:26:42,969 --> 01:26:44,537
How we gonna get to
the university?

1395
01:26:45,138 --> 01:26:46,873
[horse whinnies]

1396
01:26:48,174 --> 01:26:50,760
[classical music playing]

1397
01:27:00,120 --> 01:27:02,220
[no audible dialogue]

1398
01:27:10,130 --> 01:27:11,197
[tapping on microphone]

1399
01:27:25,779 --> 01:27:26,913
[music ends]

1400
01:27:27,800 --> 01:27:28,281
Here you go, my good man.

1401
01:27:29,983 --> 01:27:32,585
Ah, if it isn"t Victor Lustig
here to sell us the Eiffel Tower.

1402
01:27:32,752 --> 01:27:34,587
Ladies and gentlemen,

1403
01:27:34,754 --> 01:27:37,290
I give you Shriver.[college president]
What"s going on here?

1404
01:27:37,457 --> 01:27:39,626
Okay, you got a lot of balls.
The both of you.

1405
01:27:39,793 --> 01:27:42,620
No, I... I just wanna apologize.
That"s all.

1406
01:27:42,228 --> 01:27:43,463
What the hell for?

1407
01:27:43,630 --> 01:27:45,498
Because I came here
under false pretenses.

1408
01:27:45,665 --> 01:27:47,167
Apology not accepted.

1409
01:27:49,903 --> 01:27:52,105
- That man is a fraud.
- Oh, come on.

1410
01:27:52,305 --> 01:27:56,376
- A fake. An impostor.
- Would you shut up, you smelly old drunk?

1411
01:27:56,543 --> 01:27:59,179
Say what you need to say
and you go.

1412
01:28:00,880 --> 01:28:02,449
Go get her, Shriver.

1413
01:28:18,631 --> 01:28:22,702
Look, first of all, I, uh...
I really just wanted to say

1414
01:28:22,902 --> 01:28:26,639
what a privilege it has been
for me to be here,

1415
01:28:27,907 --> 01:28:30,760
to be amongst all of you.

1416
01:28:30,243 --> 01:28:35,682
Mr. Bennet, I am so looking forward to
finally attending one of your performances.

1417
01:28:36,649 --> 01:28:39,953
I wish that Ms. Brown was here,

1418
01:28:40,120 --> 01:28:44,900
but I"m going to read
every single one of her poems.

1419
01:28:46,260 --> 01:28:48,261
And, uh, to Ms. Layla,

1420
01:28:48,428 --> 01:28:51,398
I hope one day
that you"ll do me the privilege

1421
01:28:51,564 --> 01:28:54,434
of allowing me to eat
one of your sculptures.

1422
01:28:54,601 --> 01:29:00,400
T., Ms. Teresa, all of you,
just such extraordinary people.

1423
01:29:00,240 --> 01:29:03,977
You"ve treated me
with respect and courtesy,

1424
01:29:04,144 --> 01:29:05,812
and I will always remember you.

1425
01:29:06,746 --> 01:29:08,615
Very fondly.

1426
01:29:11,584 --> 01:29:14,387
But most of all, I wanted
to thank Professor Cleary

1427
01:29:14,554 --> 01:29:19,559
for allowing me the opportunity
to find myself.

1428
01:29:20,460 --> 01:29:21,461
It"s a...

1429
01:29:21,594 --> 01:29:23,196
[Brown] This is wonderful.

1430
01:29:23,396 --> 01:29:25,398
This is the most wonderful
thing I"ve read in ages.

1431
01:29:25,565 --> 01:29:27,734
She was hiding in your room
the whole time.

1432
01:29:27,901 --> 01:29:30,603
I fell asleep under your bed
and woke up yesterday afternoon.

1433
01:29:30,770 --> 01:29:34,400
I didn"t wanna deal with Layla, so
I started writing some new poetry,

1434
01:29:34,207 --> 01:29:37,911
and when you didn"t come back to your hotel room
last night, I figured I"d stay another day.

1435
01:29:38,780 --> 01:29:40,130
And that"s... [chuckles]

1436
01:29:40,180 --> 01:29:42,480
That"s when I found this.

1437
01:29:42,215 --> 01:29:44,884
This masterpiece.

1438
01:29:45,618 --> 01:29:47,200
[Victor] What did you eat?

1439
01:29:47,187 --> 01:29:49,890
Just sort of curious, I guess.

1440
01:29:49,289 --> 01:29:50,857
His granola bars.

1441
01:29:52,158 --> 01:29:53,793
In your tote bag.

1442
01:29:53,993 --> 01:29:57,430
Okay, okay, okay. Can we please
put an end to this buffoonery?

1443
01:29:57,597 --> 01:29:58,932
I"m sorry. This is ridiculous.
I...

1444
01:29:59,990 --> 01:30:00,100
Come on, Simone.

1445
01:30:00,200 --> 01:30:01,868
Uh, who"s this?

1446
01:30:02,350 --> 01:30:03,770
Well, I think Shriver...

1447
01:30:03,937 --> 01:30:05,400
Yes, I"m Shriver.

1448
01:30:05,171 --> 01:30:06,906
That "s... That"s cuckoo.

1449
01:30:07,440 --> 01:30:08,742
You"re cuckoo.

1450
01:30:12,645 --> 01:30:15,382
May I present Mr. Cheadum.

1451
01:30:16,483 --> 01:30:19,520
Shriver"s agent.[crowd murmuring]

1452
01:30:19,219 --> 01:30:20,820
Good to see you again, Shriver.

1453
01:30:20,987 --> 01:30:22,756
Good to see you.
- Looking good. - Yes.

1454
01:30:22,922 --> 01:30:24,891
Thank you. Well, this settles that.
So why don"t you two...

1455
01:30:24,924 --> 01:30:26,920
Settles what?

1456
01:30:26,259 --> 01:30:28,995
This is the real Shriver.

1457
01:30:29,529 --> 01:30:30,663
Oh.

1458
01:30:30,830 --> 01:30:32,980
- I"m sorry.
- No, it"s...

1459
01:30:32,265 --> 01:30:33,967
- Sorry.
- No. What are you sorry about?

1460
01:30:37,537 --> 01:30:39,706
You don"t know your own clients?

1461
01:30:40,573 --> 01:30:41,941
Oh, well, we"ve only met once,

1462
01:30:42,108 --> 01:30:43,810
and I was 15.

1463
01:30:43,977 --> 01:30:46,780
Uh, my father was
Mr. Shriver"s original agent,

1464
01:30:46,946 --> 01:30:49,716
and I inherited him
with the agency.

1465
01:30:54,821 --> 01:30:56,890
Okay, nobody move.

1466
01:30:58,525 --> 01:31:03,960
Jesus ****ing Christ, Simone.
What have you brought down on us?

1467
01:31:03,263 --> 01:31:06,232
Would the, uh, real Shriver
please step forward?

1468
01:31:11,938 --> 01:31:14,674
Come on, is nobody here
the author of this book?

1469
01:31:14,841 --> 01:31:18,745
This kaleidoscopic dissection
of the human condition?

1470
01:31:18,945 --> 01:31:21,314
This phantasmagorical allegory?

1471
01:31:22,482 --> 01:31:24,170
This is Shriver.

1472
01:31:24,984 --> 01:31:26,619
And I just wanna say
I"m so sorry.

1473
01:31:26,820 --> 01:31:28,254
Not so fast, Professor.

1474
01:31:28,421 --> 01:31:29,723
That"s not Shriver.

1475
01:31:29,889 --> 01:31:32,726
Ms. Brown.
I will note that you are alive.

1476
01:31:32,892 --> 01:31:35,161
So, you say you"re Shriver?

1477
01:31:35,762 --> 01:31:37,630
Absolutely.

1478
01:31:42,869 --> 01:31:44,637
- What is going on? Simone.
- Wait. Stop it.

1479
01:31:44,838 --> 01:31:46,639
What are you doing - with Mr. Shriver?
- Would you please tell him...

1480
01:31:46,639 --> 01:31:49,275
- This is crazy.
- That"s not Mr. Shriver.

1481
01:31:52,345 --> 01:31:54,647
- Why are you doing that?
- I"m... This is ridiculous.

1482
01:31:54,848 --> 01:31:56,850
Simone,
will you please tell them... Shut up, please.

1483
01:31:56,883 --> 01:31:59,753
This man - is a professional impostor.
- What?

1484
01:31:59,919 --> 01:32:02,322
Yeah. His real name:
Herbert Davies.

1485
01:32:02,489 --> 01:32:04,224
- He"s from Baltimore.
- Never been there.

1486
01:32:04,424 --> 01:32:06,593
This guy has claimed to be
a number of important people,

1487
01:32:06,626 --> 01:32:08,762
including the Chairman
of the Federal Reserve...

1488
01:32:08,928 --> 01:32:12,599
I don"t even know what that is...
and the Archbishop of Canterbury.

1489
01:32:13,933 --> 01:32:16,202
Yeah, just... just do it. Do
it.[officer] Stop running!

1490
01:32:16,369 --> 01:32:18,204
[attendee] Oh, my God.[officer] Get him!

1491
01:32:18,371 --> 01:32:20,306
[attendee 2] Someone do
something.[attendee 3] There he goes.

1492
01:32:20,340 --> 01:32:23,443
Apparently, it"s gotten him
into bed with a lot of women.

1493
01:32:23,610 --> 01:32:26,479
Several men.[attendee 3]
They got him. They got him.

1494
01:32:29,749 --> 01:32:31,885
[officer]
Stop resisting. [grunts]

1495
01:32:32,520 --> 01:32:37,490
Byron, I think this puts us back
on the literary map. [chuckles]

1496
01:32:40,930 --> 01:32:41,961
I"m so embarrassed.

1497
01:32:44,230 --> 01:32:46,132
I was so ready to doubt you. I...

1498
01:32:46,332 --> 01:32:47,333
No.

1499
01:32:48,702 --> 01:32:50,904
I doubted myself. I just...

1500
01:32:51,710 --> 01:32:54,941
When you said you would show up,

1501
01:32:55,108 --> 01:32:57,110
I thought it was too good
to be true.

1502
01:32:59,512 --> 01:33:01,247
I wasn"t listening
to the part of myself

1503
01:33:01,414 --> 01:33:04,250
that absolutely knew that only
you could write that book.

1504
01:33:07,870 --> 01:33:09,289
Well, how could you have known
when I didn"t?

1505
01:33:15,862 --> 01:33:17,297
You knew you wrote it.

1506
01:33:19,320 --> 01:33:20,567
You didn"t think you wrote it.

1507
01:33:21,735 --> 01:33:23,360
That"s why you came here.

1508
01:33:32,746 --> 01:33:34,470
Can we start over?

1509
01:33:38,510 --> 01:33:38,818
What?

1510
01:33:38,985 --> 01:33:40,120
You know,

1511
01:33:41,588 --> 01:33:43,723
like, from the beginning.

1512
01:33:43,890 --> 01:33:46,192
Just start over.
None of that happened.

1513
01:33:46,393 --> 01:33:47,861
[chuckles]

1514
01:33:51,297 --> 01:33:52,298
Hi.

1515
01:33:54,000 --> 01:33:55,402
I"m Simone Cleary.

1516
01:33:59,706 --> 01:34:01,508
[applause in distance]

1517
01:34:01,708 --> 01:34:03,209
Are you ready?

1518
01:34:03,410 --> 01:34:04,577
Mmm.

1519
01:34:04,744 --> 01:34:06,579
I"m nervous.

1520
01:34:06,746 --> 01:34:08,648
[Cheadum] I"ll never forget the
first time I met Mr. Shriver.

1521
01:34:08,648 --> 01:34:12,152
My father, he said to me, he
said, "Donny, meet Mr. Shriver,

1522
01:34:12,318 --> 01:34:13,653
the best writer
you "ll ever know."

1523
01:34:13,853 --> 01:34:15,588
Some years later, my father...

1524
01:34:15,755 --> 01:34:17,190
You"ll be fine.

1525
01:34:18,358 --> 01:34:20,226
How over drinks one night,
he told me...

1526
01:34:20,427 --> 01:34:22,495
[applause]

1527
01:34:22,662 --> 01:34:23,730
Thank you.

1528
01:34:26,299 --> 01:34:28,501
[whistling, cheering]

1529
01:34:47,187 --> 01:34:48,555
And I am...

1530
01:34:50,857 --> 01:34:51,891
Shriver.

1531
01:34:56,363 --> 01:34:58,598
"The watermark
appeared on my ceiling

1532
01:34:58,798 --> 01:35:02,135
on the rainy day
my wife walked out on me.

1533
01:35:03,169 --> 01:35:06,600
At first,
it was just a small spot,

1534
01:35:06,206 --> 01:35:08,241
approximately the size
of a quarter..."