[light music playing]>
- [gentle ping] - [electricity hums gently]>
[audience applauding, laughing]>
[man] I was right. I was right.>
Now, that's nice. That's got me, that's good.>
Most people don't get me, you know.>
Nobody's direct anymore, you notice this?>
Everybody's got, like, a secret language.>
It's like a code for what they really wanna say.>
Like the doctor who first told me my son was autistic.>
You know, he says to me, he says, "You know, the autistic mind>
is wired in brilliant and revolutionary ways.">
I said, "Oh, yeah?>
How so?">
Because, you know, my son didn't speak.>
Didn't speak at all for years.>
Communicated only in grunts, growls>
and ear-piercing screams.>
[dramatic piano instrumental playing]>
And then when he finally started speaking, he wouldn't shut up.>
- [audience laughing] - It's true. He wouldn't. He wouldn't.>
That doctor could've saved us both a lot of time if he'd just said the truth.>
Just slap those *****es, and show 'em who's boss!>
- Ezra! - Autistic kids don't give a ****, man.>
- Say my name! Say my name! - [man] They don't. They don't.>
[indistinct shouting]>
[intense orchestral music playing]>
You look good.>
How's work?>
Good.>
When did Ezra see Breaking Bad?>
We binged it last weekend.>
- Maybe we should be a little more careful. - What-- what do you mean?>
He's been reading the New York Times since he was five.>
He can handle Walter White.>
- [woman] Thank you for coming in. - Hi!>
- Hi, Jenna. - Mrs. Lee, hi. Nice to see you.>
Max, you both know Dr. Tamarova.>
[Jenna] Mm-hmm.>
[woman] Ezra, please stay with Anthony.>
Hi, hi, Ms. Cathro.>
Uh, what-- what's happening?>
Why is Ezra not with the rest of the class?>
[Cathro] He's really been acting out today.>
I have other students who want to learn,>
who count on me to keep them safe.>
- I'm getting so tired of this shit. - Max, please.>
No, you know that he's bullied here, right?>
Yeah, maybe he was trying to make that vicious little kid laugh.>
Ezzie came home with a bloody lip last week.>
Anybody get expelled for that?>
Spoke to that boy's parents as well.>
Right, but Ezzie's the bad one.>
[doctor] No, no, Ezra is not bad,>
but today, he was a danger to himself and others.>
There it is, there it is. The secret language.>
- I was waiting for it. - [Jenna] Max.>
- Huh? - Max! Stop.>
You can't expel him. He's been working very, very hard.>
And, yes, he has had his bad days,>
but he's also met a lot of the goals>
that you set for him.>
Ms. Lee, please.>
Y-You can't drop him.>
[man] Max, this autism shit, it's depressing.>
[woman] You can talk about whatever you want>
if you give us a reason to want to listen.>
And I want to listen. I think my cousin's autistic.>
- But it's gotta be funny. - [man] See, the sign says comedy on it.>
- It's not a funeral parlor. - [Max] Huh.>
What is this, a ****ing intervention?>
[man 2] I disagree. You need to go deeper, further.>
Make a whole set out of it.>
Well, make a whole evening out of it.>
You know, "Disabilities with Max.">
Well, I'm not telling jokes. I'm storytelling.>
I know you're not, but you gotta make it funny.>
Sad stories, Jackie, you should see his sad stories.>
[Jackie] Oh, I've seen 'em plenty.>
[man 2] Divorce is not for pussies.>
[man] Nosy, dark, and ***y.>
Sorry to interrupt, I just wanted to tell you>
- I loved your set. - [man] There you go.>
- [Max] Thank you. - You're welcome. I'm Susan.>
Can I buy you a drink?>
[man] I'd save the dough. This guy is in mourning.>
[Max sobbing]>
[Susan] Hey.>
- Are you crying? - Ah, come on.>
I'll call you.>
Really?>
No.>
[sighs] He cried, didn't he?>
It's his kid, my grandson.>
You hungry?>
Fix you something to eat.>
[piano melody playing]>
[Jenna] It's a bigger number than we discussed,>
but it's exactly the neighborhood that you wanted.>
Listen, th-there are multiple bids,>
so I think we have to come in above the ask.>
I wish that wasn't the case, but, unfortunately,>
it's still a seller's market.>
Ezra! Breakfast!>
[♪]>
- Where'd you get the shirt? - Come on. Cut it out. It's not your shirt.>
- You sure it's not my shirt? - I'm sure.>
Enrico moved to the Ritz.>
And my building is still a union house,>
and there's an opening now, so...>
- Yeah? - ...I want you to consider that.>
Yeah, okay.>
I'm just not gonna be a doorman, Pop, thank you.>
There's nothing wrong with being a doorman.>
And a man your age shouldn't be living with his father.>
They're expelling him. They expelled Ez.>
They want me to put him in a special needs school.>
Nah, none of it's special. It's all bullshit.>
Yeah, there it is, they're recommending drugs.>
Put him in a gym, let him work off that special sauce.>
- Yeah. - But you gotta keep fighting.>
Yeah, keep fighting, right. You know how much that's costing me?>
I'm paying for her lawyer, my lawyer.>
Jenna knows I'm broke. Can I have a fork, please?>
She knows you're still not over her, too. That's one thing.>
Just cut it out already, all right? Give me a break. Come on.>
Okay, who cries after ****ing a stranger?>
That's crazy. You gotta move on, kiddo.>
Believe me, I know what it's like to **** things up with a woman>
and to get stuck with a kid on top of it.>
More coffee?>
Yeah, what, am I new here? I'll take a coffee.>
[siren blaring]>
Tell me something good, Jayne.>
I have something really, really good.>
I'm not doing it. Nah, I write for me now.>
- Come here. - For me.>
Come here.>
I'm not sitting on your lap.>
I got something to tell you.>
Come on.>
You don't want me to get up.>
All right, no one's gonna hire me in late night anymore.>
Conan ****ing blackballed me.>
Well, you punched him in the balls.>
Well, I was aiming for his stomach.>
He's so ****ing tall!>
- Why are you so crazy? - [grunts]>
Listen, Robert Segal has heard great things about you.>
Robert Segal. What, Kimmel's booker?>
He wants to see you down at the Cellar tonight.>
No, I can't. I can't do it tonight.>
I'm taking Ezzie to The Big Lebowski tribute.>
We're gonna dress up like the characters, throw shit at the screen.>
- It's gonna be awesome. - That's all cute, but not tonight.>
I can't. I can't let the dude down.>
You wanna do something for your son?>
You get Mr. Segal to book you on Mr. Kimmel.>
[Jenna] Okay, ready? I'm getting the costume.>
Okay.>
Okay, this is cozy.>
- This is gonna be itchy. - I know.>
[Jenna] Okay.>
- Okay. - Wait, not now, I got it.>
- I got it. - [Jenna laughing]>
You look so cute!>
- [Ezra screaming] - I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!>
- It's okay. Sorry. It's okay. - [whimpers]>
- [pants] - I'm sorry, Ezzie. It's okay.>
It's okay. It's okay.>
It's okay.>
- [traffic noise] - [birds chirping]>
[indistinct chatter]>
[man] I got it, honey.>
Wow, look at you.>
- So, a lawyer walks into a bar-- - No, no. Don't do that, Bryce.>
- It's Bruce. - Ezzie! Ezzie!>
And you're "Hay-zeus," the bowler, right?>
It's "Jesus," man.>
- Jesus. - Have you not seen the movie?>
No, it's been a-- oh! And here's the Big Lebowski!>
I'm not Mr. Lebowski. You're Mr. Lebowski.>
I'm The Dude.>
[Max] Well, not yet you're not.>
Let's see.>
Now you're The Dude.>
[Jenna] Let me see.>
Just in case. [clears throat]>
Okay, he's with me. He's not gonna have a meltdown.>
Sure. Well, we'll be back by 9:00,>
so just the movie and straight home.>
- Promise? - Yeah, I promise.>
- Okay! - Okay.>
[Jenna] Okay.>
- Straight home, guys. - Yeah. You, too. Okay?>
- [Jenna] Have fun! - [Max] All right.>
[Bruce] He didn't like my joke.>
[hard rock music playing]>
[overlapping chatter]>
You're nice.>
[man] What's up, buddy?>
[Max] Jack-Jack-Jacquelyn.>
- What's up, Max? - I'm gonna go get changed.>
- Hey, Ezra. - Hi.>
Have you been to a costume ball, then, love?>
No. Big Lebowski, 7:00 p.m. show.>
Oh! Great movie. Love it.>
I'll have a White Russian.>
Virgin White Russian for The Dude.>
Actually, pineapple juice. I'll have a pineapple juice.>
- You make me think of pirates. - Really? That's weird.>
Yes.>
Even though the pirate accent>
is typically West Country English.>
Yaarrgh!>
The Irish are fine pirates.>
[door creaks open]>
Oh! Drop the lobe! Drop the lobe.>
Max is stoned, everyone. Max is stoned.>
Really, dude?>
[Emma] I don't know if anyone's>
in an interracial relationship.>
I'm in one. My girlfriend's Puerto Rican.>
- Yes! Thank you. I appreciate that. - [Max] See him?>
Okay, see the guy over there with glasses?>
That's him. Okay, I need my Ezzie mojo, okay?>
You ready to be my good luck charm?>
Find me a more unhappy human being.>
Depressing. Why would I do that?>
Don't be so literal, Ezzie. Come on, let's go.>
It doesn't matter how small it is. He called me the other day.>
He was like, "Emma, I was at the grocery store,>
- Okay, guys, ready for your next comic? - [audience cheering]>
Gimme the mojo. Gimme the mojo! Gimme the mojo!>
One of my personal favorites.>
He was a writer for some of the biggest names in the business.>
Now he writes for himself.>
Clap it up for my buddy, Max Bernal!>
Let him hear ya!>
- [audience applauding] - Yes!>
[audience cheering]>
- That's Emma Willmann! Give it up! - [audience cheering]>
- How we feeling? - [audience] Good.>
- Now, take it easy. I don't really care. - [audience laughing]>
My son is here tonight! That's right. My son is here tonight.>
Dying of shame.>
Stand up, and take the wig off, Ez!>
- Stop talking about me! - [audience laughing]>
Okay. I didn't expect that. Uh, you know,>
try to have a little respect, okay, Ez?>
I'm up here humiliating myself to give you a better life.>
- [audience laughing] - All right.>
I'm good to you, you little prick.>
- Not like my old man. - Pop-Pop!>
That's right. Pop-Pop.>
That's the last time he'll speak, by the way.>
Pop-Pop, that's actually the perfect name for my old man.>
Pop-Pop. It's like two gunshots.>
One to the head, one to the heart. "Pop! Pop!">
Let me tell you a little bit about my old man.>
This guy, you know, he was a-- one of the top gourmet chefs>
in New York City back in the day.>
Worked at all the top restaurants. It's true, you know.>
Every one of which he got shit-canned from>
because nobody could stand working with him.>
I mean, the guy got driven out of town,>
and the only place he could find a job as a chef>
was at a steakhouse in Nebraska.>
- [audience] Ooh! - That's right.>
You know cuisine in Nebraska, man.>
- There isn't any. - [audience laughing]>
I mean, you kill it, they grill it, you get a Michelin tire, see?>
So, I'm five years old, I'm living in Nebraska,>
it's my birthday party, and you know, it's a lot of pressure.>
I mean, you know, I've got these fat farmers' kids staring at me.>
I'm the only thing standing between them and the cake, so, you know...>
Papier-mâché bib, it's 1980, so you know everything I'm wearing>
is made out of napalm.>
I bend down, blow out my candles,>
I'm about to do it when I hear my pop say,>
"Blow out your ****ing candles, Max!">
[audience laughing]>
I flinch. I fall forward.>
Candle lights me up. I light up like a ****ing road flare.>
I'm telling you, I am on fire!>
My old man, he grabs his Dr. Pepper,>
he puts me out like a campfire, and says,>
-"You want some cake, Maxie?" - [audience laughing]>
I says, "No, Pop.>
- I want my eyebrows back!" - I want my eyebrows back!>
[audience laughing]>
Thanks, kid.>
I'm gonna go kill my son.>
Hey, I think it's great that you memorized my set,>
but you can't be steppin' on my punchline, buddy.>
I can't let the train go off the rails!>
Okay, Ez, here comes Mr. Happy now.>
Okay, just whatever you're thinking, don't say it, okay, please.>
- Good set. - Thank you.>
- I think I'll book your kid. - Ha!>
You're still not funny, Bob.>
Ezzie, meet Mr. Segal. Bob, this is my son, Ezra.>
So, um, next week, a producer comes in>
- to see you and Sal Argento. - All right.>
And then, one of you is doing the Kimmel show in Los Angeles.>
Mr. Segal, are you sad because you're bald?>
- He's dark. - Mm.>
Like his daddy. [chuckles]>
- Get your best stuff together, Max. - Okay.>
- All right? You're gonna need it. - All right. All right.>
[Bob chuckles]>
Sad and bald? That's you not talking?>
- [Ezra] I was just asking a question. - [Max] Okay.>
Come on, let's get out of here before your mother kills me.>
- [Ezra screams] - Sorry. Sorry.>
[Max] Well...>
[yawns] Oh, my god.>
[Max] Okay. [grunts]>
Snug as a bug in a rug.>
[inhales]>
[sighs]>
- [screams] - Okay. All right, all right.>
I wasn't doing anything.>
Hey. We had a good time, right?>
- Just one more. - [screams]>
All right, all right! Hey. I love you.>
Good night.>
Who says autistic kids can't communicate?>
"Ah, get out of my room!" And I'm out. Yeah.>
He's the best communicator in the world.>
You can use the sensory brush next time.>
Nah, nah, nah, the brushing thing is your thing.>
What is he, an alpaca?>
You did a set at the Cellar, and you promised me you wouldn't.>
- You're driving me crazy. - I'm sorry, okay?>
A guy from Kimmel came to see me,>
- and I needed my good luck charm, right? - Oh.>
You know me. I needed my mojo man.>
Did you read Dr. Tamarova's assessment?>
Look at you. You are so pretty. Come on. Give me a kiss.>
- Brad's gone already. - Stop it.>
It's Bruce, and he's in the kitchen.>
- Brian is in my kitchen? - [Bruce] Hi, Max!>
You know, he's never gonna belong in our house.>
Max. This is my house. Did you read it?>
[sighs] Yeah, I read it. I read it, yes.>
But it was a mugging. They just want him out of there.>
The Board of Ed will pay for him to go to a special needs school.>
He doesn't need a special school.>
Max, he led 20 kids onto Washington Street.>
- It was incredibly dangerous. - Okay, but he's not dangerous.>
He's a challenge.>
****. Nobody wants to do the ****ing work.>
The work? The work. All I do is work.>
You come here, you play dress up to take him to comedy club.>
- Bring him home at midnight. - That's not what I meant, okay?>
Look, we're on the same team, Jen.>
You know how he thinks. I know how he thinks.>
He just needs to be seen, Jen, you know?>
And heard and-- and appreciated for what he has to offer.>
Yes, yes, but he also needs to be able to give us a hug>
without screaming.>
It's an opportunity, Max.>
He'll be with trained teachers and aides>
in a school built for him,>
how he needs to learn.>
No bullies.>
He'll be with kids just like him.>
- Nice. Kids like him, huh? - Okay.>
- That's not what I meant. - You know what? I know what you meant.>
Here's the thing, I'm a kid like him.>
And kids like us, you know what we need? To be with all kinds of kids.>
So, no, I will not accept her recommendation ****ing ever.>
- [door opens] - [sighs]>
[door shuts]>
- [Bruce] You all right? - [Jenna] No.>
It never fails!>
Every time we get close to something>
that might actually work,>
Max has to blow it up!>
This is the third school that Ezra's been expelled from.>
There's no other options. What am I supposed to do?>
[Bruce] Well, I could get rid of Max for you.>
- [Jenna] Oh, you can do that for me? - Yeah. I'm a lawyer.>
I have no moral compass.>
Besides, I know a guy. They call him Jimmy the Hatchet.>
Bang, bang, *****es. Cut off his head, and feed him to the fishes!>
[dramatic orchestral music playing]>
[Ezra murmuring in panic]>
- [dog barking] - [woman] Get down! Get down! [indistinct]>
- [car honking] - [tires screeching]>
[Jenna] It won't be too much longer, sweetie,>
but you scared the hell out of me.>
Honey, why'd you sneak out of the house like that?>
Hmm? Please don't do that ever.>
- Say you'll never do that. - I won't ever do that.>
Miss Demuzio saw you run in the street,>
and then a taxi came out and then he hit you.>
- I mean, you could've been-- - A dog tried to bite me.>
I had to get away from his teeth.>
Hey, Jen. They're almost ready for him.>
No!>
- [Jenna] It's okay. - [Max] Hey.>
- Hey. Dad's here. - What's happening?>
Hey, buddy. Hey, hey. You okay?>
What's going on? Huh? What happened?>
- 14th Street Viaduct to Manhattan Avenue. - What?>
- Three blocks to the park at-- - Hey, hey, I know-->
- I know you know where Pop-Pop lives. - I'm sorry.>
Don't be sorry, okay? Just tell me what-->
- You're mad. - No, I'm not mad.>
Okay, I'm not mad-->
Okay, you know what? Yeah, I'm a little bit mad.>
Eyes. Eyes. Ezzie.>
- What were you doing running outs-- - Can I talk to you for a second?>
[sighs]>
- Hey-- - [Ezra growls]>
[nurse] Ezra Bernal.>
- Why's he in the middle of the hallway? - They need to run tests.>
What do you mean tests? What tests? You mean like X-rays?>
- Psych evaluation. - What do you mean psych eval-->
- [medical bed rattles] - Hey, where you going? Hey, no, thanks.>
- I had the same reaction. - What psych evaluation?>
- He got hit by a cab. - It's protocol for children.>
- Excuse me. Is there a problem? - Yeah. We need to see a doctor, please.>
- I'm Dr. Kaplan. - Oh, okay. We-- hey, stop!>
Sir, you need to let the man do his job.>
Yes. Let's just relax. Just-->
- Dad? - Yeah, I'm right here, buddy.>
- [Jenna] We're here, honey. - Don't worry.>
We're gonna sort this out in a minute, okay?>
[♪]>
[sirens wailing]>
They made me draw pictures,>
stuck lights in my eyes and asked me questions.>
What kind of questions?>
They asked me if Mom or Dad ever tried to hit me.>
If I had ever tried to hurt myself.>
Okay, I'm sorry they asked you that kind of stuff.>
Are they gonna make me live>
somewhere else?>
- Like in a hospital? - No.>
They can't.>
You have family, and they have to answer to us.>
- So, that's not gonna happen. - Okay.>
Next move.>
- You sure you want to do that? - Oh, yeah.>
KO.>
You had to do that, didn't you, huh?>
- [footsteps approaching] - Hi.>
Thank you for your patience.>
I know it's been a long night.>
I have some good news.>
We are going to send Ezra home this morning.>
- [Jenna sighs] - But because of his age>
and because a witness saw him run in front of a cab-->
That's bullshit.>
Please. Let him finish.>
Ezzie would never just run in front of a cab.>
- Just listen to the doctor. - [doctor] I know this is traumatic,>
but I'm doing what the law says I must do.>
Ezra is technically a ward of the state.>
- You don't have that right. - Legally, he does actually.>
Let's just hear the doctor out.>
[doctor] Ezra has a history of fleeing>
and putting himself in danger.>
Now, I'm not going to put him into a pediatric psych ward.>
But I am going to require him to attend a school for special needs.>
And I would like to try a prescription for Risperdal.>
Risperdal? That's an antipsychotic.>
- Your son has been a danger to himself. - He has not!>
Max! He nearly died! That happened.>
Just let him finish. Let him finish.>
[doctor] We are going to revisit this in three months.>
But right now, Risperdal is the correct medication.>
- [Bruce] Max. - No, no. I just-->
- You got a lot of Risperdal here. - [Jenna] Max.>
What do the drug companies give you for pushing this on kids?>
You get a free ****ing badge?>
- Hey, Max, come on. Take it easy. - Take it easy.>
Now, I see where the dangerous behavior comes from.>
- Oh, excuse me? - [Bruce] Max!>
You son of a *****!>
- [doctor grunting] - [objects clattering]>
[sirens wailing]>
- [Max] No. I'm not doing that. - [Bruce] Max.>
I got Dr. Wells to drop the assault charge,>
- but you gotta go with the program. - **** that guy.>
- He's a drug dealer. - He's in control is what he is.>
Of the special ed school, the medications, all of it.>
[stammers] And what about the, uh, about the restraining order?>
Three months. You can't go near Ezra.>
I'm sorry. It's the judge's decision.>
I can probably get it down to a month if you use the behavior cards.>
**** those cards. He pisses on those.>
You want to go home or you wanna spend another night in here?>
It's up to you.>
- [birds chirping] - [kids playing]>
[sighs]>
Must have been humiliating being rescued by your wife's boyfriend.>
[Max] Please stop talking.>
She's obsessed with this retard crap.>
Hey, what's wrong with you, huh?>
Nobody says "retard" anymore, okay? Nobody. Don't say it again.>
[Pop-Pop] Okay. I won't say it.>
You know, it's a felony having this.>
That's a lot of bullshit.>
I served my country. I have a right to have this.>
Food. You served food.>
I had no choice. Now they're telling me I can't see Ezra.>
I-- I got no say in what drugs they're gonna give him.>
What school they're gonna put him in. What the f-->
[indistinct chatter on radio]>
You got anything to say?>
- She cut you out good. I know. - She didn't do this.>
She didn't have to. I just picked you up from prison.>
What are you talking about?>
- That's the best you got? - What am I gonna say?>
You rush in blind, you get knocked on your ***.>
You can't control your own power,>
then what the hell do you have? Nothing.>
Says the guy who knocked out a customer>
because his steak was overcooked?>
That was a perfect steak.>
Ah, you see now, there it is.>
- There's my twisted moral compass. - That's right. Whatever.>
Whatever's right. Yeah.>
Maybe if that were true, we'd still be in Nebraska,>
I'd still have a mother, what do you think?>
- [tires screeching] - [cars honking]>
What are you doing? What are you doing?>
- [Pop-Pop mumbles] - Stop.>
- [horns honking] - I'm sorry, all right?>
I just-- I didn't mean to bring that up.>
****ing guy says to me, "Hey, stupid, there's no blood on my plate.">
I say, "Hey, I'm sorry." And I punch him in the face.>
I say, "Now there is blood on your plate.">
What are you talking about? I'm talking about my mother.>
Now what, now you're gonna start blaming everything>
that's wrong with you and your life on me and your mother?>
Get the **** out of here!>
You know what? You're a ****ing ***hole!>
**** you. Learn how to ****ing cook a steak.>
- [woman] Move the car! - [cars honking]>
[Jenna] Got it?>
Good job.>
Do you really think you should wear the dinosaur costume>
on your first day at a new school?>
Hmm.>
Hey, it's gonna be great.>
There's gonna be all these new kids, and you're gonna find the nicest ones.>
Hey, psst, Ezra.>
Ezzie.>
- Ezzie. - [growls]>
[classical piano instrumental building]>
[indistinct chatter]>
[school bell ringing]>
[teacher] Okay, everybody. Inside!>
[♪]>
You've got to head in, Ezra.>
What class do you have? Art?>
[audience laughing]>
[Max] You know, I was thinking about it recently.>
This ****ed-up game we used to play when I was a kid.>
- [inaudible dialogue] - You remember Musical Chairs?>
- [audience] Yeah! - Yeah?>
- [audience member] Whoo! - Whoo! Really? Jesus Christ!>
It's like a roomful of pharmaceutical executives.>
- [audience laughing] - You know, I was thinking about this game.>
But you know what the catch is.>
If you got a dozen kids, you only got 11 chairs.>
So, who doesn't get a chair,>
"**** you, you're out," right?>
Yeah, it's brutal, it's brutal.>
I mean, these kids, they turn into savages, man, right?>
They bite each other, they kick each other.>
They poke each other's eyes out.>
What sadist invented this game?>
And why do they even call it Musical Chairs?>
There's nothing remotely musical about Musical Chairs, man.>
It's like, uh-- it's like the original Squid Game or something.>
[audience laughing]>
You know, I just, uh-- I got out of prison a couple days ago.>
- It's a true story. - [man cheers]>
Thank you. Thank you.>
You know, I, um, put in some hard time.>
- Toughest 14 hours of my life. - [audience laughing]>
But, um...>
yeah, this doctor, doctor.>
****ing doctor.>
Tried to push some drugs on my kid, so,>
you know, I had to knock him out,>
and, uh, they threw me in jail.>
Uh, but they offered me a deal.>
If I let them give my son>
the same drugs they give to the criminally insane,>
they'd drop all the charges.>
So I, uh...>
took the deal.>
My son needed me to go to bat for him...>
and I sold him right the **** out.>
[sentimental piano instrumental playing]>
[Jayne on phone] Where are you? What are you doing? You have a spot.>
- You need to get back here. - [Max] I'm not coming back.>
Listen, Max, I really, really want you to fly.>
Really high. I really do.>
But you have got to stop bombing the runway.>
You know the bit I did about the meds and Ez,>
it's all true, right?>
Okay, fine. Then come back and tell them.>
But you gotta come back here.>
And they'll understand. Listen, Kimmel loves kids.>
So do I.>
[♪]>
[bed crackling]>
Shhh.>
Hey, remember when we did that drill down the fire escape?>
You wanna do it again?>
Okay.>
You gotta trust me, buddy.>
Oh, yeah, I got a nice bed for you back here, Ez, huh?>
You got your Star Wars pillow. I got snacks.>
This is gonna be fun!>
Hey. What are you doing? What are you doing?>
Don't worry about it. Go back in the house.>
- What do you mean? - [Max] Don't worry about it.>
You're not taking the car.>
- Just having a little father-son time. - You're not taking the car.>
- It's a Thrilla in Manila! - [Max] We're not fighting, Ezra.>
We're not fighting, just talking.>
[Ezra] Frazier whipping the mighty Ali!>
There's a court order out for you. Are you crazy? What are you doing?>
Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!>
[Max] I gotta get him to bed.>
Get in the car, Ezra. Hey, listen to me, okay?>
I saw him at that school, I saw him on those drugs.>
They were killing him. I need to get him away from here.>
You're doing it wrong. What the hell is the matter with you?>
Pop, I swear to God, stop, okay? Just stop.>
You told me to fight, I'm fighting. Let's get in the car, Ez.>
You're not fighting, you're running! What are you doing?>
I'm not running. Ezra, get in the car!>
Okay. It's okay.>
- I got some waffles for you. - No.>
There's no waffles. Ez, get in the car.>
- [Pop-Pop] You want fresh whipped cream? - Stop it, please.>
Listen, we're family. We're the Rice Krispie boys.>
He's Snap, you're Crackle, and who am I?>
- [Ezra] Pop-Pop! - That's right!>
And we're not fighting, we're just sparring.>
So show me what you got.>
That's it! And, and-->
- Oh! - [Max] All right! Knock out!>
[Max] Good job. Come on, buddy.>
In the car. Come on. Let's go.>
- [Pop-Pop] This is a mistake. - Let's go. Okay. Says who?>
- [Ezra] Can Pop-Pop come? - [Max] No, Pop-Pop can't come.>
Pop-Pop's gonna hold the fort down. Right, Pop-Pop?>
- Where are you taking him? - I'm going to Nick's in Michigan.>
Oh, Jesus. That Greek prick. Of all the ****ing people-->
[Max] Stop it. He's my best friend.>
That guy's a ****ing thief!>
I take him into my house, he steals from me.>
He didn't steal your saucepan.>
I'm not stealing your clothes. Nobody's stealing anything, okay?>
You're making a mistake. You can't do this.>
You know what? Take this, please. Already have enough problems.>
- Thank you! - This is crazy!>
- Say, "Bye, Pop-Pop!" - [Ezra] Bye, Pop-Pop!>
Bye, Pop-Pop!>
["Sisyphus" playing]>
What the **** am I doing?>
♪ Sisyphus peered Into the mist ♪>
♪ A stone's throw From the precipice, paused ♪>
♪ Did he jump or did he fall>
♪ As he gazed into the maw Of the morning mist? ♪>
♪ Did he raise both fists And say "To hell with this" ♪>
♪ And just let the rock roll?>
♪ Let it roll>
♪ Let it crash down low>
♪ There's a house down there But I lost it long ago ♪>
Ezzie? Ezzie?>
Ezzie?>
Ezra?>
♪ See my house down there But I lost it long ago ♪>
Ezzie?>
Ezra? Ezra!>
- [Max] Did you get a good night's sleep? - No.>
I bet it's Mom.>
I bet you're right. Ugh.>
Parental abduction is defined as one parent taking a child>
without permission from the other parent.>
- Yeah. - [Jenna] You kidnapped Ezra?>
I can't be kidnapping if I'm his father.>
Of course it can! You have a restraining order!>
I'm saving my son's life.>
Ezzie needs somebody to advocate for him>
the way you and I used to dotogether.>
You know I'm right.>
No! No, you're not right, Max. You are wrong, okay?>
You need to bring him home now!>
[Ezra screaming]>
- Is that Ezra? - [Max] Hey, hey, hey, hey!>
- [waitress] Let go! - No bananas!>
- No bananas! - [Max] No bananas!>
- Get his inhaler! - Excuse me!>
Okay, Ezzie. It's all right, breathe.>
Breathe! Breathe. Breathe. Breathe, all right.>
I got you. It's okay. Come on. Come on, come on.>
Where's the bathroom? Where's the bathroom?>
- Come on. You're okay. - [Ezra groaning]>
[phone chiming]>
[Max] He's all right.>
Look, I didn't know that there were>
bananas in the oatmeal, right?>
- What you're doing is insane! - Nah, I don't think it is.>
That's the problem. You're not thinking.>
Trust me, this is very,>
very, very bad.>
In fact, this is a crime.>
Bring him back!>
[scoffs] Max?>
Holy shit! He hung up on me again!>
- [yells] - [phone thuds]>
****!>
You know, you can call the police.>
No, I'm not-- I'm not gonna make this worse.>
I'm not traumatizing my son.>
[phone chiming, vibrating]>
[vibrating continues faintly]>
Hey, buddy, what's the deal with the bananas?>
- Hmm? - I start gagging, and I can't breathe.>
Well, okay, but we know that you're not allergic to bananas, right?>
Because we saw that doctor, remember?>
So, maybe the banana thing's in your mind, you know?>
[Ezra growling and mooing]>
I'm growling and I'm mooing, what am I?>
I got no idea, but you're freakin' me out there with no shirt on.>
Mad cow disease!>
Oh, is that original material?>
- SpongeBob. - Ah, I see.>
That's why it wasn't funny.>
[bittersweet piano music playing]>
Are you going to prison?>
Look, Ez, Dad made a big decision when I was upset,>
and that's never a good idea.>
"Bang, bang, *****es.>
I'll cut off his head and feed him to the fishes!">
Okay. Maybe no more Breaking Bad.>
Mom might be right about that one.>
Bruce wants to kill you. You can't go home.>
- Okay, he's definitely not a fan-- - No! That's what he said!>
What?>
- When? - When I got hit by the cab.>
I was coming to Pop-Pop's to warn you about Bruce.>
Okay, hold that thought, buddy.>
[car engine stops]>
Are you telling me>
that you didn't run into the street on purpose?>
Ezzie?>
Ezzie, I need your eyes, okay?>
This is very important.>
Are you saying that you didn't run into the street on purpose?>
Am I nuts? A dog tried to bite me.>
Did you tell Mom this?>
- Don't be mad. - Nobody's mad.>
- There was-- - I wasn't supposed to tell you?>
Yes, of course. Hey.>
Telling the truth, that's your biggest superpower.>
Huh?>
Thanks for telling me.>
You know what?>
I think we gotta dance.>
- Come on. Let's find a good station. - ["Express Yourself" playing]>
Ah! There it is. Ah. Can you move your butt muscles?>
Come on. Let's go. Move it up. Into your chest.>
Into your shoulders. Ah, yeah! Let it roll.>
Let it roll. Down to the ***. Back up to the shoulders.>
Now some pops. Some claps. Huh? Elbows up.>
Ah, yeah, let it roll.>
Let it roll. Come on. Up into your chest, dude.>
Into your chest, Ezzie.>
Yeah, yeah, that's it. Let it roll. Let it roll.>
♪ Express yourself>
[song fades]>
[Ezra] I need to rinse!>
- [phone chiming] - [Max] Coming.>
Hey, Jayne.>
- Where the hell are you? - Uh,>
I'm just taking a little time off with Ez.>
Not a good time to take off, Max.>
Yeah. I-- I know. I know. I-- I screwed up.>
Yes, you did, and they were pissed!>
Yeah, look, I had a bad night. It happens, right?>
No.[scoffs] Sal Argento had a bad night.>
Yeah. I guess that's something, right?>
No, what's something is having a manager>
who gets Jimmy Kimmel to watch the video.>
Video?>
What-- what video?>
The one I made with my phone!>
[chuckles] He wants to book you.>
- What? - [Ezra] I need to rinse!>
So you have to get yourself to LA.>
They're not gonna fly you. Is that gonna be a problem?>
Uh, no.>
- Uh, when? - Next Friday,>
4:00 pm in the Kimmel studio.>
Rinse!>
Okay. All right. I'm coming. Uh...>
- He loved you, Max. - He loved me, really?>
I love you, Jayne.>
- You're full of shit. Bye. - [Max chuckles]>
Rinse!>
Okay. I'm coming. I'm coming. Hey, ow!>
Shit! That's boiling hot! Come on, get out!>
Get out! Get out! Get out! Come on.>
What-- what are you doing? Why-- don't you feel it? It's hot!>
- I don't-- I don't feel hot! - Okay, it's hot, though.>
Okay? Look at your arms. They're all red!>
Mom checks the temperature!>
That's fine, but if you see steam, it means it's too hot, okay?>
- God damn it! - My stupid brain.>
- Stop, no. Hey, come on. Sit down. - Stupid! Stupid!>
- Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! - Stop that, okay?>
You're not stupid! You're not-- stop hitting yourself.>
Hey, hey, hey, listen to me. Hey, hey. You're not stupid.>
You're not stupid. You're smart, okay?>
If you see steam, it means it's too hot. Easy-peasy, okay?>
It's on the cards.>
We don't have the ****ing cards!>
I'm sorry.>
- Mom uses Bactine. - Oh, yeah? Well, guess what.>
We don't have Bactine, so you and I,>
we're gonna have to figure it out together, all right?>
There we go. Nice.>
You know what? I got a better idea.>
I got a better idea. Let go. Here.>
Ready? Come on. Stand up. Stand up. Arms up.>
Huh? Armpits. Isn't this fun?>
Huh? Does Mom do stuff like this? No?>
I didn't think so. Okay.>
We got this!>
Why do you always yell?>
Because Pop-Pop used to lock me in the attic>
chained to a radiator.>
I had to yell so he'd remember to feed me.>
There are no radiators in attics.>
You are good. Nothing gets past you.>
Boom. There you go.>
I want to talk to you about something.>
I just got off the phone with Aunt Jayne.>
Turns out Jimmy Kimmel wants me to be on his show in Los Angeles.>
That's far.>
Yeah, it is far.>
Did you get the part about Jimmy Kimmel wanting me to be a guest on his show?>
Yeah?>
So, you got anything for me?>
Any advice for your dad?>
Be polite.>
"Be polite.">
Anything else?>
- Nope. Now stop asking me. - [chuckles] Okay.>
But where am I gonna get my mojo from?>
- Mojo man! - That's right.>
Good. Okay.>
Let's have a staring contest.>
- I don't want to. - Come on.>
- For me? Please. - No.>
- Pretty please? - No.>
What if I make it worth your while?>
If I win, we go trick-or-treat?>
Yeah, deal.>
Ready? Come on. First one that blinks loses.>
Go, one, two,>
three, four...>
- Are you autistic? - ...five, six...>
- seven... - Mom says you are.>
...eight-- Mom thinks everyone's autistic-->
- nine, ten... - She thinks you got it from Pop-Pop,>
who gave it to you, who gave it to me.>
Listen to me. Nobody knows for sure, okay, honey?>
Nobody.>
[whispers] But it doesn't matter 'cause you're awesome.>
Fourteen, 15, 16...>
- Does Mom love me? - ...seventeen.>
Buddy, Mom loves you more than anything in the world.>
Yeah. Okay?>
She and I, we're just having a disagreement right now.>
- You blinked! I win! - Uh! Oh, you did so good.>
You did so good. You win.>
- Good job, buddy. - [humming]>
Let's go. Bring it. Yeah, baby! Whoo!>
- [banging on door] - [doorbell ringing]>
[Jenna] Stan, can you open up, please!>
[banging and ringing continues]>
Stan!>
[banging and ringing continues]>
- We need to talk! - [doorknob rattling]>
- Stan? - [knocking on door]>
Hey, I know you're in there!>
Open the door!>
Stan, just talk to me, please?>
- [banging on door] - I'm worried about them.>
Please?>
You don't give a shit!>
Huh?>
You're going to let Max ruin his life again!>
- [objects rattling] - And your boys too!>
- Jerk! - [loud thud]>
[engine starts]>
["Golden" by My Morning Jacket playing]>
♪ Watching a stretch of road>
♪ Miles of light explode>
♪ Drifting off a thing>
♪ I'd never done before ♪>
♪ Watching a crowd roll in>
♪ Out go the lights it begins>
[Nick] Hey! There they are!>
- [Max] Hey! - [Nick] Hey!>
[Max] Hello, baby!>
Ezzie, get on out here and give your Uncle Nicky a hug!>
Oh, come on, come here! Hey, where you going, kid? Oh, I got you.>
Oh, that's it. That's it! You are dead. You're so dead! Oh!>
Hi! I'm Margaret.>
How are you?>
Wanna help me set the table?>
Come on.>
- [Nick] Oh, you're... - [Max] Oh! Look at you!>
No chance! Jesus Christ, man. Huh?>
Bottomless s'mores when you run a camp.>
- Endless s'mores. - Can you get that?>
- I'm not gonna carry anything. - Okay.>
What's up with the, uh-- the bad habit there?>
That's Sister Margaret from Senegal.>
Oh. That's way outta town.>
Yeah, she's, uh, staying with a family in Ann Arbor.>
She goes to Michigan.>
You know that they want nuns to have a bachelor's degree?>
- Why the **** would I know that? - I mean, can you imagine that?>
Four years of college before you can say your vows.>
But as long as she's on my staff,>
Catholic church pays half my expenses.>
Huh. Scammin' the Vatican. I'm proud of you.>
- Yeah, huh. - [Ezra] There's no cheese on it.>
[Nick] Wait 'til you try it. It's incredible.>
She uses ancient Senegalese spices.>
[Margaret] I got the spice from Costco.>
- Whoa! - Costco.>
That sounds exotic! Costco.>
[Nick] I thought you brought it from Senegal.>
[Margaret] No. You're mixing up the cheeses.>
And she puts goat-- she puts goat in the lasagna.>
- [Margaret] What's wrong? - Metal hurts my teeth.>
Okay, but you know, plastic hurts the planet. So...>
[Nick] Oh, I got some plastic right in the store room, I can just-->
No, no. We're okay. We're gonna use the fork.>
[Margaret] It's okay-->
It's mind over matter like the bananas.>
Come on, Ezzie, try it.>
Ezzie.>
E-- Ez, come on. That's not polite.>
Pick up the fork and try it please.>
- Ez? - I-- I need plastic.>
- Mom has plastic! - Okay. Well, Mom's not here.>
Ezra. Where you going?>
- Ezra? - [Ezra] I need plastic!>
- You don't listen to me! - [Max] Sorry, guys.>
Ez, come on. Come on back, please.>
It hurts me!>
- Because they're razor sharp! - [Max] Ezzie! Ezzie!>
- It's not in my mind! - Ezzie!>
- Ezra, come and sit down! - I'm not taking it!>
I'll make you a deal. I'll let you eat with your fingers>
if you try a fork once.>
- It hurts! It hurts! - Once, Ezra.>
I would take that deal.>
- I need plastic! - [Nick] Sounds like a good deal.>
Plus, I'm gonna use my fingers, too.>
So will I.>
[Max] Once, Ezzie?>
Deal?>
Okay! Let's do it! Let's get to work!>
All right!>
Come on, Max. Join the party.>
Join the lasagna party. Now-- oh, God.>
- Oh, man. Of course. - [Margaret] Oh, my!>
"They each shouldered the heavy pack and the water skin>
which was their share,>
then turned from the light that lay on the lands outside>
and plunged into the forest.">
[crickets chirping outside]>
[mellow piano music playing]>
You can go now.>
Ezzie, did you just-->
For me?>
You can go now.>
Okay?>
Goodbye.>
Okay.>
[Margaret] Max, oh, my goodness, I have a crush on your son.>
Ah, he'll break your heart.>
Don't worry. I can take it.>
All right, but you know what?>
If there's no future, Sister, let's not lead him on.>
Hey, hey. I haven't taken my vows yet.>
- [Max] Oh! - [Nick] Uh-oh. [chuckles] Okay.>
[Nick groans, sniffs]>
[Margaret] Good night.>
- [Nick] Good night. - [Margaret] Smoking, huh?>
The wages of sin is death.>
[Max] Did she just bless you?>
She does it every time she leaves.>
I think it's making me a better man.>
Look, I-- I don't want to be sacrilegious, but I think this could be love.>
[Nick] Hey.>
I'm Greek Orthodox,>
and we don't go there.>
Okay? [exhales]>
And she, oh-- she's a holy spirit.>
- All right. Here you go. - I'm just saying, man.>
House in the woods, summer camp, hot nun.>
[Nick laughs]>
Yeah, it sure beats telling **** jokes to drunken tourists.>
Hey, it's a living.>
It wasn't for me. [sighs]>
So why are you here?>
What do you mean? I needed a little Nicky.>
[chuckles]>
You got a little bit of Nicky,>
and, uh, Nicky's a little concerned.>
You haven't signed the papers yet, have you?>
[chuckles] Seriously?>
[sighs]>
- That's it. You blew my high. - Are you gonna cry?>
Do you wanna cry? You wanna let it go?>
Come to Papa Bear. Come on.>
I tried to give her everything, Nick.>
But where would she put it?>
[both laugh]>
- God bless Steven Wright. - Ah.>
"All those who believe in psychokinesis>
- raise my hand." -"Raise my hand.">
I broke into Jenna's house in the middle of the night,>
and I kidnapped Ezra.>
[Nick laughs]>
All right, I'll play along.>
Why did you break into Jenna's house and kidnap Ezra?>
Ezzie snuck out of Jenna's and got hit by a cab.>
What?>
His doctor said he might've done it on purpose.>
Shit!>
You think that was true?>
No! Wha-- you kidding me?>
Every day he wakes up, that kid chooses life.>
Oh, good.>
- That's good. - [sighs]>
So why'd you do it?>
Jenna thinks he should go to a special needs school, and I don't.>
- Why not? - Because in public school,>
you know, he'll learn how to fight, learn how to protect himself.>
What are you, the great Santini?>
What are you-- what are you talking about?>
I see people move away from Ez, right?>
He has a temper tantrum or he's just walking down the street.>
You know, people aren't trying to be mean, it's just that it's easier.>
You know the word "autism" comes from the Greek>
"in your own world.">
I don't want him in his own world, Nick. I-->
[voice cracking] I want him in this world.>
[sighs]>
[Nick sighs]>
[phone vibrating]>
You make it back okay?>
[Pop-Pop] Put Max on the phone.>
Oh, my God. [sighs]>
I don't have your pan.>
[Pop-Pop] Hello.>
- Hello? - Yeah, I'm right here, Pop.>
What do you think, the world stopped for you>
- to hang out with this idiot? - What are you talking about?>
She took my son and I took him back!>
You made a promise, you didn't keep your promise.>
She's throwing rocks at my window now.>
- Hang up the phone. - Hello?>
I'm coming there tomorrow!>
- [both] No! - Then listen to me carefully.>
Call Ezzie's mom.>
- You hear me? Call Ezzie's mom. - I don't have your pan.>
[phone chiming]>
- Where are you? - Uh, don't worry about it.>
- Where are you? Where are you? - You know, Jen, I gotta say,>
in spite of everything that we've been through,>
I-- I really believed you when you said that no matter what,>
we were gonna treat each other like family,>
and we were gonna be honest with each other.>
- Remember you said that? - You haven't been honest, Max.>
You took him, and you need to bring him home!>
L-Let me ask you something.>
Did Ezra tell you that the reason he ran into the street>
was because he thought he was gonna get bit by a dog?>
Yes, I mean, what difference does it make?>
He ran out of the house in his pajamas, barefoot,>
and he nearly got hit by a cab!>
Yeah, because he heard your boyfriend say he was gonna kill me.>
Yeah, and he was coming to warn me.>
Okay, y-- you're scaring me now, Max.>
I'm scaring you? Why don't you ask your boyfriend?>
You know Ezzie doesn't lie!>
Okay. Hey, hey, you-- you're right.>
You are family. You are.>
But you need to just bring him home now, okay?>
Come home, and we'll talk about all of this.>
None of this is easy,>
but all I ever wanted was just to protect our boy.>
Well, I'm protecting him now.>
And leave my father alone.>
You waited four days to call about a missing child>
taken by a man you're divorcing,>
who has a restraining order keeping him from seeing that child.>
- Is that about right? - [Jenna] I know how it sounds.>
He's his father.>
You don't think he'd hurt your son?>
No. No, no, absolutely not.>
All right. Um, let's make a few calls.>
We'll see if we can find him, and, um, put a trace on his phone.>
No disrespect, Mike, but no.>
I'm sorry, miss, but right now I'm not feelin' good about this.>
- You understand? - Yeah, I understand.>
Good, because from a missing and exploited child perspective,>
we need to issue an Amber Alert now.>
Are you sure this situation warrants-->
Margo, let's just start with a missing person's report>
Amber is for situations exactly like this one.>
And we're late, ma'am.>
I'm afraid it's not your decision.>
[gentle guitar music playing]>
[Margaret] You know how to do it?>
[Margaret chuckles]>
[Nick] Hey, that's nice. Thank you.>
- [Max] Packed up and ready to go. - [Nick] Okay.>
I don't think that kid's ready to go, though.>
- Hmm? - You see him over there>
- making lanyards with Sister Margaret? - Yeah.>
- Kid's trying to steal my girl. - [Max chuckles]>
- [Max] They look good together. - [Nick chuckles]>
I think it's the autism. Chicks dig it.>
Sometimes I think I might be on the spectrum.>
I think you check a lot of the boxes.>
- Yeah. - But, nah, I just think>
you're a strange dude.>
Yeah, I'm just uncomfortable in social situations.>
It's good you're out here.>
- Yeah. Keeps me away from... - Everyone.>
- People. - Yeah. Yeah.>
[sighs] You guys are welcome to stay.>
Oh, buddy. I'd love to stay, but we can't. I gotta be in LA.>
- What's in LA? - [sighs]>
I booked Kimmel.>
- Are you ****ing kidding me? - Yeah, it's not-->
You wouldn't lead with that? That's amazing!>
- Yeah, it's okay. - Max, come on!>
- Kimmel, that's great! - Yeah.>
Best I did is get bumped from ****nio. Worst night of my life.>
Hasselhoff segment ran long.>
- [chuckles] - I'll tell you what, you go to LA,>
you work on your set, you get relaxed,>
you get focused, you get centered, take care of yourself.>
Leave Ezra with me.>
Me and Margaret will take care of him-->
I can't do it, buddy.>
- I gotta have him with me. - Why not?>
Because I need him. He keeps my feet on the ground.>
All right, fine. [sighs]>
I'll bake you a cake and bring it to you in prison.>
Okay, well, make sure you throw Stan's saucepan in there.>
- I don't have the pan. - [whistle blows]>
Okay, Mr. and Mrs. Carlton. Have a lovely day.>
[Stan chuckles]>
[Jenna] Where are they?>
What do you mean? Just call him.>
He doesn't answer. He's just like you.>
I-- well, I can't talk. I'm working. I can't.>
Hello, Mrs. C. And how are you today, young ladies?>
- [girl] Hi, Stan! - Score a goal,>
there's a box of Cracker Jacks in there for you.>
Cracker Jacks are no good for her teeth.>
There's gonna be an Amber Alert.>
What do you mean? You called the cops on him?>
Where is Ezzie?>
He's with his father. You shouldn't have done that.>
That's a-- that's a very bad thing to do.>
- I did a bad thing? - Yes.>
- You're making it so he can't see him. - Max did that!>
- What did you expect him to do? - Not kidnap him!>
You made it kid-- you made it kidnapping.>
[Stan groans]>
Please. Please.>
- Stan, I don't-- - How could you do that?>
Amber Alert. Do you know what that is?>
- I don't wanna fight. - Well, I don't wanna fight either,>
but all of a sudden you don't believe in him.>
Now you're gonna-- Amber Alert?>
I got tired of not knowing what he was gonna do on any given day.>
I'm already so tired with Ezzie. Please, I just-->
I'm-- I'm scared. I'm tired. I'm alone. And I need help.>
Rice Krispies boys make me really tired.>
All right, well, we're gonna have to-->
we're gonna have to get to 'em before the cops do.>
- We? - Yeah, we. Yeah.>
The shift ends, we start driving.>
Take 11 hours to get to Michigan.>
Hopefully, get to them by tomorrow.>
He's at Nick's?>
Yes. He's with Nick. I'm not happy about that, but yes.>
Unfortunately, we're going to Nick's. Yeah.>
[Max] I have a self-destructive personality.>
[audience laughs]>
But it's okay 'cause I recently had a breakthrough.>
After thousands of hours of hypnosis therapy,>
I finally met my inner child.>
And he had a gun.>
[audience laughs]>
Yeah, oh, hey. What's up, little guy?>
Whoa. Okay. Well, what?>
Okay, come on. Put-- put the gun down. Put the gun down.>
I'm trying to do a show here.>
Can you get back in my psyche please? Thank you.>
Anyway, my therapist said to me, "Max, you're an adult now.>
You don't need your inner child. He can't help you anymore.">
I said, "Oh, yeah, really, Mark?>
He's got a gun. What do you got?>
I'm taking this little sociopath with me everywhere I go.">
Thank you, Lansing!>
Great audience. Have a great night!>
[audience cheering]>
[comedian] Come on, everybody, let's hear it for Max Bernal!>
[Max] Let's have a, um, whiskey neat>
and another pineapple juice for my manager here.>
[bartender] Pineapple juice coming right up.>
You really should get the boy home.>
- [Max] Okay. - He's your son, right?>
Uh, yeah. That's-- uh, that's my son.>
It's after 12:00. I was watching him.>
He doesn't seem happy here.>
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on. You were watching him during my set?>
- And now I'm offended. I got this, Ez. - No, Dad, Dad...>
- I got it. - No child should be in this club.>
Especially not a child with issues.>
- Issues? - Yeah.>
- I can't hear. - Really? Let me ask you something.>
Do I come to where you work and knock the **** outta your mouth?>
[bartender] Whoa, whoa, whoa!>
- That's my wife. - Oh, really?>
I'm sorry to hear that, but she should mind her own ****ing business.>
Hey, hey, hey!>
[all shouting indistinctly]>
[glass shattering]>
[Ezra] Dad!>
[woman screams]>
[Max] Come on, Ezra!>
[emotional piano music playing]>
- They were the owners. - Like I said, Ez, I didn't know.>
- They were the owners. - We covered this already, okay?>
That's enough now.>
- I wanna go home. - Hey, buddy, I'm sorry, okay?>
- I want to go home! - It was my bad.>
Okay, listen to me, Ezzie, okay?>
Sometimes life's gonna get messy, okay?>
And if it does, that's okay.>
You know, people say life's gotta be neat,>
it's gotta be nice, but it doesn't.>
- You hear me? - Yes.>
Okay.>
All right, that's good.>
Go to sleep. That's-->
that's a good idea.>
[♪]>
[Jenna] I really appreciate this, Stan.>
A mother's job is never done.>
Or a father's.>
[Jenna chuckles]>
I guess I don't even know anymore.>
Here. Turn here. Here.>
There he is. There he is. Get close. Look, look.>
Okay. Okay.>
[Nick] Shit!>
[Pop-Pop] Look at your guilt on your face.>
- What are you doing? - What am I doing?>
- Run, Zorba, run! - Get off my property!>
Yeah, run! Come on, run!>
- **** you, Stan! - Yeah, **** you!>
Come on, I told you, I don't know where they went!>
[Jenna] I thought you had more sense, Nick.>
Yeah, well, I thought you had a heart, Jenna.>
- Think about Ezra! - My kid is out there!>
- Oh! Oh! Oh! - Where is he?>
I'm gonna plunge this into your heart right now>
unless you tell me exactly where they are!>
Where are they?>
They went to go do Kimmel in LA!>
He got Kimmel?>
Yeah.>
I know. He booked Kimmel.>
Can you believe it?>
I mean, he's funny but-- [groans]>
Wait, please don't tell Max that I ratted him out.>
I'm not strong.>
- Ow! - Stop whining!>
God.>
Meet me in the car. I've got some unfinished business.>
Please, please, don't leave me alone with him.>
Okay, I'm going to put this in as loving a way as possible.>
You need help!>
Oh, hi, this is Jayne Green's assistant.>
I was wanting to confirm the date and time for Max Bernal's appearance.>
Yes, I, uh, accidentally deleted an email.>
Oh, great! Thank you so much.>
Appreciate it. Take care.>
Let's go.>
I'm gonna get a coffee.>
- Ooh, there's candy. - Hey, you've had enough sugar.>
[Max chuckles]>
Uh, can I have a black coffee please?>
- Sure thing. - Thanks.>
Hey, dude, where can I get a local motel you can suggest?>
Uh, yeah, you got the Jersey plates, right?>
- Uh-huh. - '71 El Do?>
- Yeah. - Sweet.>
Yeah. Hey, hey, sir, you-- you got a great-- great eye for cars.>
Ah, only sort of. Uh, my grandma's got an El Do.>
So, five exits, Best Western, includes breakfast and biscuits.>
- Oh. Great. Which way? That way? - That way.>
Hey, look, I'm on TV!>
Yeah, look at that, buddy. Your commercial's running everywhere.>
- This should help. - Yeah.>
Child actor, we're on our way to Hollywood>
for a big screen test.>
- Not true. - Why don't you go>
- wait for me in the car, yeah? - Hey, wait!>
Have I seen you in anything?>
Sanford and Son. It will be remade!>
Hey, let me get your autograph. Sign it "To Tim.">
"You'll never catch me alive, Tim!">
[door creaking]>
[Max] DUI Checkpoint. What the hell?>
[car rattling]>
- [Max] Whoa! - [Ezra] What's wrong?>
Nothing! Go back to sleep, buddy.>
- Come on, it's late. - What are you doing?>
- Just taking a shortcut. - To where?>
- Best campsite in Nebraska. - This isn't a shortcut!>
- Yeah, it is! - No, it's not!>
I can see the road right there-- shit!>
- [metallic clanking] - ****!>
Ez? Ez, where are ya? You okay?>
- Ezzie? - [Ezra groans]>
I want to go home!>
- [car door clicks open] - [Max] Ez.>
Ez! ****! ****! Hey, come on, buddy!>
Okay.>
Come on, where are you?>
Ez?>
Ezzie?>
[breathing heavily]>
****!>
[foliage rustling]>
Ezzie!>
Ez!>
Ezzie!>
[♪]>
[steam hissing]>
- [Max] Hey! Stop! - [Ezra] No!>
Stop!>
- Hey! Hey! I said stop, okay? - Ow!>
Stop! I said stop!>
I told you to stop!>
What are you gonna do?>
Hit me? You wanna hit me? Come on, hit me!>
No! I'm-- I'm not, I'm not.>
No, I just-- you scared me, buddy.>
You freaked me out. I'm sorry. Okay?>
Why did you take me?>
Why did you take me if you don't know how to help me?>
I don't know, buddy.>
You're my superhero. I just-- you're everything.>
You're my mojo.>
I'm not your superhero!>
I'm not your mojo! I'm not your buddy!>
I'm your son! And you're my dad!>
My dad! My dad! My dad! My dad! My dad!>
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.>
- [sobbing] I hate you. - It's okay.>
I hate you. [sobbing]>
[hissing continues]>
[crickets chirping]>
[line ringing]>
[Max breathing heavily]>
- [Stan] Hello? - Pop?>
Hello?>
I almost hit my kid.>
Wh-- what happened?>
What h-- what happened?>
- I-- I almost-- - What?>
I almost hit Ezra.>
Where are you? Shit.>
- I-- I'm in the-- I'm in the woods. - Where, where, where?>
The ****ing woods. I don't know where, okay?>
I just-- I almost hit Ezra, and I-->
I don't know where to put all this, Pop.>
I don't know where to put all this ****ing rage.>
You don't put it anywhere. You just-- you bury it.>
Yeah, okay. But I'm asking you, what do I do?>
You know what to do! You can't-->
I don't. I don't know what to do, man.>
I'm in a forest, I'm losing my shit,>
and I don't know what to do, so I thought that maybe,>
just maybe you might just be like a normal dad>
and give me some ****ing advice!>
Max, shut up. What are you talking about?>
I'm trying to talk to you about it now.>
And then you want some advice?>
I'll give you some advice.>
It's this simple.>
Bite your arm off, tie yourself to a tree,>
do whatever you need to do to not hit your kid.>
It's that simple.>
You understand?>
Look what happened with us. It killed me.>
You cannot hit him. You cannot hit him!>
Okay, I-- Yeah, I get it.>
Are you sure you do? Because if you did,>
you'd know it's time to throw in the towel>
on this stupid trip.>
- It's not a stupid trip. - Yes, it is.>
It's not, Pop. It's not stupid.>
Yes, it is. It's stupid.>
How are you gonna feel if you end up back in jail?>
Then what?>
[Max sighs]>
Where are you? I'll come get you.>
****. ****.>
[panting]>
[birds chirping]>
[Jenna] You can't even say the word.>
[Stan] It's just a word.>
Autism.>
Yeah, whatever.>
[chuckles]>
Saying it out loud, it'll help Ezzie in his life.>
Nah, you know, I don't-- I'm not sure about that.>
We gotta be able to talk about this and not...>
Okay, tell me. What do you want to talk about?>
I don't want to be hiding about it.>
I want to talk about it. I want to give it a name.>
I want to get-- I want to get all the help we can get.>
Who's hiding? Who's hiding? Nobody's hiding.>
Max is hiding him right now! He took him, he's hiding him!>
He's not hiding him, he's taking him somewhere.>
You think he's gonna kill him? He's gonna-->
I don't think-- of course I don't think that.>
- [overlapping conversation] - I don't think that, but he scared me.>
You know he's gonna take him somewhere or do something.>
But that doesn't mean he's gonna do anything bad to him.>
I don't know.>
The fragility of Max and his mental state,>
and his situ-- he's-- he flies off the handle.>
He doesn't know how to control Ezzie.>
He doesn't know everything that he needs.>
No, he doesn't. But neither do you. Nobody knows.>
- I-- - It's what it is.>
It's a condition that just is there.>
We have to deal with it.>
And I know you-- I know you think>
my side gave him what you say he's got.>
- I never said that. - You didn't have to.>
I never said that.>
And my wife did the same thing. I had the same fights with her.>
- Do not compare me to his mother. - I'm not comparing you, but-->
Don't compare me to his mother.>
I'm not comparing you, but there is a similarity.>
I'm sorry. It is what it is.>
I devoted my life to this family.>
I'm devoting my life to this family. That woman abandoned him.>
I don't even know what happened because you don't talk about it,>
and Max doesn't talk about it, so nobody talks about anything.>
But-- but what she did was unforgivable.>
Don't compare me to her.>
How dare you.>
It was a-->
it was a long time ago, so it's all over with now.>
[flies buzzing]>
[Ezra] I can't believe you grew up around here.>
[Max] Yeah, I know, right?>
Pop-Pop met my mother in New York,>
and then, well, we all moved to Nebraska.>
Why did your mother leave?>
Uh, you know, it's funny, buddy.>
I-- I don't really know.>
That's not funny.>
You're right. It's not funny.>
You know, I just-- I woke up one morning, and she was gone.>
And I guess, uh,>
I guess after so many years,>
I just worked it out for myself>
that she must have been pretty sad>
to do something like that, right?>
She was a terrible mother.>
You're right. She was.>
She was.>
[Max] All right, come on. Let's go.>
Hey, folks, thank you again.>
- Thank you so much. - [man] Bye. Be safe now.>
[Max] What a nice couple.>
I bet-- I bet they've been together since they were your age.>
- I'm going to die a virgin. - What? No, that's bullshit.>
Someone out there who loves dinosaurs,>
Dostoevsky and Family Guy.>
- You watch. - And live action D&D.>
And live action D&D. There you go. You know what you want.>
- What are we doing here? - [Max sighs]>
The lady who lives here is an old friend of your dad's.>
This place looks like a demon movie waiting to happen.>
[chuckles] Let's hope not, huh?>
Ah! [knocks on door]>
- Oh, my God! - Oh, hey!>
- Hi. - What-->
- Hi. - [chuckles] Oh, no!>
- Hi! - Hi, Grace. Hi!>
What are you doing here?>
[Max sighs] That's a-- that's a long story.>
Um, Grace, this is Ezra.>
Nice to meet you, Ezra.>
Heard a lot about you.>
- I've never heard about you. - [Max] Yeah.>
- [girl] Who's here, Mom? - [Max] Oh, wow.>
- You're-- - [chuckles] This is my Ruby.>
Way different from your baby picture.>
[chuckles] I hope so.>
- Hi. - [Grace] This is an old friend, Max.>
And his son Ezra.>
Hi.>
Do you wanna come play with Harper and me?>
[Ruby chuckles]>
Come on! Harper!>
[Harper panting]>
- This is a surprise. - Yeah, I know.>
- Mm. - You think we can go inside?>
I'm kind of a fugitive from the law.>
- What the hell? - I'm not joking.>
Come on!>
[Harper barking]>
Harper!>
[Ezra] Does...>
does Harper always follow you?>
All the time.>
Lucky dog.>
[girl] Get off of me! [laughter]>
Ridgeway has tried to push me into Jack's pond.>
- You loved it! - [girl] You wish!>
- [Ridgeway] You moving on my girl, man? - Uh, I'm not his girl.>
[Ridgeway] Introduce us, Rubes.>
- Ezra, Ridgeway and Cally. - Where are you from?>
He's from back east.>
Wow, look at him go.>
Please don't be a ****.>
"No one cared who I was until I put on the mask.">
That was pretty random, freak.>
"Who is Bane? Why does he wear the mask?">
Dark Knight is my obsession.>
Let's go.>
[Grace] So tell me again.>
Oh, I just ran out of patience.>
Which happens to all parents.>
Yeah, but what I was seeing-->
He wasn't safe.>
And now he is?>
Appears safe to me.>
- Ugh... I don't know, Max. - What?>
Why don't you let me call Jenna?>
No, no, no, no. Look, I already called her, okay?>
She knows he's okay.>
Okay.>
Yeah.>
I'm not gonna fight you on it, all right?>
So eat your sandwich, wash up,>
and hitchhike off to LA.>
Look, I know this all seems insane, but...>
- Yeah. - ...I didn't know where else to go.>
So...>
So let me help you.>
I can't-- I got-- I gotta finish this, Grace.>
I do, you know. That kid is-->
is the one thing that I can't get wrong.>
That's right. That's right, you can't.>
- Because he's perfect. - No.>
He's not, Grace. He's not perfect.>
And everybody's trying to make him be>
just like everybody else.>
Me included, right?>
And then one day he might magically wake up>
[stammers] and become the coolest, most amped up>
and normal kid that's ever walked the face of the earth.>
And that is not gonna happen.>
It's not.>
It's not. It's never gonna happen.>
So, I have to protect him,>
you know, and if I can't protect him,>
well, then, he's not gonna make it.>
And I-- [exhales]>
["Carry You" by Novo Amor plays]>
[Max sighing]>
Do you want caramel or fudge?>
[Ridgeway] Both.>
[Cally] You're so bad.>
Oh, my God! You have to try this, Ezra!>
Come on. I won't take no for an answer.>
Uh-uh.>
You won't regret it.>
♪ Torn down>
How good is that?>
♪ Full of aching>
♪ Somehow>
You okay?>
♪ Our youth would take the blame ♪>
♪ Worn out>
[Grace] Yeah, I mean, nobody uses it.>
[Max] Oh, my God.>
- Here she is! - Oh!>
I gotta lay hands on her.>
- [Grace laughs] - Oh, I'm getting the vibes.>
We did everything in this bucket.>
[laughs] You know what?>
If she starts, take her.>
- Really? - Mm-hmm.>
Okay. Thank you.>
I'll-- I'll get it back to you just as soon all this blows over.>
It's okay. It's gonna be fine, Max.>
It's gonna be fine.>
You just need to stop biting the dog.>
♪ Climb down>
- What-- what do you mean? - Sixth grade.>
A dog was coming toward us, and you bit the dog.>
Oh!>
- Yeah, well-- - You bit it.>
I was-- I was trying to protect you.>
- Oh, right. Come on! - I was protecting you.>
Come on! I mean, the dog wasn't even gonna bite me or you.>
The poor thing ran off with its tail between its legs.>
- Yeah? - Yeah.>
Listen, not everyone is trying to bite you, Max.>
♪ Hallowed>
[Ruby] You want to feed him?>
Have you ever ridden one before?>
How would you feel if you left here>
and didn't even pet one of these gorgeous animals?>
Like a loser.>
Okay.>
So, let's start with how to greet a horse.>
You approach a horse from the side so he can see you.>
Then you pat him right here on the side of his face.>
Then you say in the nicest way, "Hello, Bosco.">
Hello, pasture king.>
I bet he likes pastures.>
And he likes you.>
You can tell?>
You bet.>
Just look him in the eye.>
Looking a horse in the eye is like sharing your soul.>
[♪]>
[Ruby] You just made a friend for life.>
♪ I will carry you always>
[Ruby] Uh, Mom, Tom's at the door.>
- [Grace] Ooh! - [Max] Who's Tom?>
- All right, uh, Max, keys are in the car. - Okay.>
Cally, Ridgeway, show him the horse trail.>
- Ruby, take Ezra, go get his bags. - Okay.>
Go. Go! Go!>
Okay, don't forget your dinosaur, okay?>
- [Grace] Go, go. - Hey.>
I'm sorry.>
- [Max sighs] - That's okay.>
[indistinct mumbling]>
- Hey, Tom, what's up? - Sorry to bother you, Grace.>
I got a couple swear>
they gave a father and kid a ride>
and dropped them off here.>
Seems the father kidnapped the kid from New Jersey.>
That's horrible. What can I do?>
I'm sorry. Would you mind if I had a look around?>
- This woman's really upset. - No, not at all. Come on in, Tom.>
- Yeah. - Thanks. It'll just be a minute.>
[engine cranking]>
- [Cally] Hey! Don't flood it! - Okay. [chuckles]>
[engine cranking]>
[engine roars]>
[Ezra] I guess this is it.>
[Ezra exclaims]>
[quietly whimpers]>
All right, you two, get a room!>
"I don't mean to be rude, but that was not as easy as it looked,>
so I would appreciate it if you wouldn't distract me.">
The Princess Bride.>
Kid's a genius.>
[♪]>
[faint horn honking]>
Can we get a horse?>
Dude, we live in Hoboken.>
Yeah. That's what I thought.>
Hey, Ez, you understand why I'm doing this, don't you?>
Of course, you want to be on Jimmy Kimmel.>
Any father would.>
No, no. That's not it.>
I mean, s-sure, but it's more than that.>
You know, um...>
you know how Pop-Pop gave up being a chef>
and then he took that job as a doorman?>
Well, he did that for me.>
That makes no sense.>
Well, that makes perfect sense, actually, buddy.>
Because-->
because, you know, a dad's job>
is to take his son down the field.>
- What field? - Any field, you know?>
Football field.>
Football causes brain injuries.>
Okay, that's true, but in this case, it's a metaphor, right?>
- Right. - So-- so a dad's gotta-->
he's gotta go down that field, right?>
And-- and if he gets tackled before he scores-->
- Game over. - Except that it's not.>
'Cause all that dad wants, right,>
is... is for that kid to pick up the ball where his dad got tackled>
and to take it the rest of the way.>
- Touchdown! - Exactly.>
He's gotta keep going until he scores.>
Anyway...>
that's why I'm going to Kimmel.>
You're a good dad.>
[cars passing in background]>
[yawns] You want some coffee?>
[Stan] Yeah. Love some.>
Why don't you get a table in the House of Pies over there.>
I'll meet you right there. I just wanna fill it up.>
[Jenna] I'll see you inside.>
See you inside.>
What do you wanna drink?>
"Life's a sport, drink it up.">
Okay. What's that code for?>
"Looks like we've got another mystery on our hands.">
I love the quotes, okay, but not for every situation, right?>
This nice lady's got her work to do.>
Iced tea, please.>
My man, Ezra.>
Dropping quotes and flying without a net>
so that he could order himself a-->
"Iced tea, please.">
[both laughing]>
- Where you going? - Hey, what's going on?>
My name's Ezra.>
And I'm going to tell you all a joke.>
Where do horses go when they're sick?>
To the horsepital!>
Yeah.>
Thank you! You've been a wonderful audience!>
Wow. First original joke.>
- I'm proud of you. - New material is not easy.>
[Max chuckles]>
Hey, buddy, I'm gonna go, um, wash my hands, okay?>
- I'll be right back. - Okay.>
Okay.>
To the horsepital.>
What are you doing here?>
Never mind that. Listen, I need to-->
- How did you find me? - We don't have time for this.>
How did you find me all the way out here?>
We were at the House of Pies. I saw you over there.>
- Who? We who? - Me and Jenna. She's there.>
- It's okay. - Je-- Okay.>
Oh, Pop, you got some balls. Listen to me.>
- Will you shut up? - No, you shut up.>
I'm trying to tell you something.>
You go back to the House of Pies,>
and you never saw me.>
Shut up. I'm trying to tell you something.>
I'm not here to stop you.>
I'm here to apologize.>
- For what? - Well-- Look.>
I'm sorry.>
I-- you know, I-- that's all, I'm sorry.>
What are you talking about? What happened? What?>
Your mother left, and-->
and I loved her, but I-- I was impossible to live with,>
and I never really told you about any of that, and so, I-->
- I'm sorry. - What do you mean?>
Mom left because I was a pain in the ***.>
- That's what you told me. - No, I was the pain in the ***.>
It was me. All I ever did was fight. And every fight I ever had>
was against someone I thought had it in for me.>
And those kinds of fights you never really win.>
You just go from one person to another until there's nobody left.>
And then when I wasn't fighting, I was-->
I was-- I was hiding-- I was hiding>
in restaurant kitchens, boxing gyms.>
I was-- Now I'm hiding holding doors open for strangers.>
I'm-- I'm-- I just-->
I hid because I didn't know what else to do, I-->
I didn't know how to do what I see you doing.>
What?>
You're fighting for something>
that means something.>
Maybe it's too much, but you're trying to do the right thing.>
And you're in the fight of your life for your son.>
And if you get arrested, you're gonna get arrested.>
But as far as I'm concerned, you're my heavyweight champion.>
'Cause I had a problem.>
I had a problem with your mother, and I'll never forget.>
I wish that I had done what you did.>
You might have to suffer consequences,>
but it's-- it's worth it 'cause you did it for the right reasons.>
You did it because you love your kid.>
Taking him out of the bed in the middle of the night-->
- A felony. - No, no, no.>
Took a lot of courage.>
Believe it or not, it might've been the best thing you ever could've done.>
And what you're always worried about, not having a family, you gotta stop that.>
And I'm here, and Ezzie's there,>
and the woman in the House of Pies, well,>
it'll all be all right with her.>
That'll all work itself out eventually, but you gotta know>
that you have a family that loves you>
and that needs you and that cares about you.>
- Now be careful. - Okay.>
- I gotta get back. - Okay.>
Okay.>
[upbeat piano music plays]>
[Max] All right, so you recognize any of these names, buddy?>
[Ezra] Yeah. Sidney Poitier.>
"They call me Mr. Tibbs.">
Of course. Stupid question. My bad.>
"Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.">
- Dorothy is Liza Minelli's mom. - Okay.>
- And that's a fact. - Pick up the pace, okay?>
- Come on. -"Crying?>
There's no crying in baseball!">
[laughs] Come on. Come on.>
- Is Jimmy here? - He might stop in to say hi.>
Oh, good. My son's a big fan.>
No, I'm not.>
[Stan] Park there.>
- [Jenna] This is handicap. - Yeah. Take the spot.>
- It's handicap. - Take that spot.>
[Lance] Do as much of your set as you want for the soundcheck.>
- How's the mojo today, good? - Good till the last drop.>
- Hey, Max. - Yeah.>
- See the box? - Uh-huh.>
Don't step outside the box, don't look at Jimmy,>
and do not go over your time.>
- You good? - Jesus. At ease.>
- Batteries in this thing? - I hope so.>
- Ezra, I got a front row seat for you. - Okay.>
Check, check, check. Is that mic down over there? That's it?>
Great. Thanks. How's everybody doing tonight?>
Good? Hello? Ah.>
I gotta stay in the box. Gotta stay in the box.>
Hi there.>
Hi, did Max Bernal arrive with a young boy?>
Both very handsome.>
Just have a way of looking at things through a negative lens.>
Which makes sense, you know, I was a breach baby.>
My dad says I came out with a black eye.>
He says I popped out, and the first thing I said was,>
-"Who thought this was a good idea?" - [laughter]>
It's right through here.>
My son came up to me the other day,>
he said, "Dad, you're an awfulizer.">
I said, "Honey, I don't think "awfulizer" is a word.">
- He says, "Yes, it is." - Yeah!>
There he is, my son.>
I think he might be on to something actually.>
I think I am an awfulizer.>
Because truth be told>
I can take any situation and just...>
make it worse.>
Mr. Bernal. I'm Special Agent Costa.>
FBI. We're here to take you into custody.>
Okay. I-- I can't believe this.>
- Can you not do this in front of my kid? - Hi, Ezra.>
I'm Jessica.>
We're going to take a little walk, all right?>
[Max] I've travelled all the way across the country with my son.>
I understand that you came across the country.>
[indistinct chatter]>
[Max] Ezzie, it's fine. It's fine.>
- [Jessica] Let's go get some ice cream. - [Jenna sighs] Ezzie.>
Your daddy just needs to talk to my friend Joe.>
Everything's fine, Ezra, okay? My-->
- [Ezra screaming] - Don't touch my kid!>
- Don't touch my son! - [Jenna] He doesn't like to be touched!>
- [Stan] Don't touch him! - It's okay, Ezzie.>
[Ezra moaning]>
It's okay. It's okay. Look, I know.>
I called you myself, and I made a mistake.>
[Stan] It's okay, Ezzie. It's okay. We're all here.>
[Jenna] It's okay. It's okay, Ezzie.>
- Ma'am, I need you to back off. - I need you to back off!>
This is my son. Hi!>
Hey, baby. Ezzie. Hey, buddy. You okay?>
Hi. Hi.>
Ezzie, I missed you.>
Ez? You okay, buddy?>
Did you have a good time? How was the trip?>
- I talked to a horse. - What?>
That's amazing.>
I wish I'd been there.>
I'm sorry, ma'am, but we still need to arrest Mr. Bernal.>
I'm the one who called you. I made a mistake.>
As you can see, my son is fine, so-->
- We don't have a choice, ma'am. - You do have a choice.>
I am his mother, this is his father, this is his grandfather.>
We are a family, and we are taking him home together.>
So thank you very much. There's no need for any of this anymore.>
- [Jessica] Okay, everybody just stay calm. - Hey, man. It's okay.>
- [agent] You need to calm down. - No, I am calm.>
[overlapping conversation]>
Hey! He's not resisting!>
I'm not resisting. She's not pressing charges, right, Jenna?>
- [Jenna] We're calling off the charges. - [Max] Come on! Stop!>
- [Jenna gasps] - [Ezra] Dad!>
- [microphone feedback] - Get off my dad!>
- [agent] Get off! - [Max] I gotta finish.>
Dad, eyes. Dad! Dad! Eyes.>
It's okay. It's okay.>
You got tackled.>
Give me the ball.>
[Max sobbing]>
[Ezra whispers] Calm down. It's okay.>
[Max] Okay.>
- [Jenna] Okay. Let's go! - [Ezra] Coming.>
[Jenna] Come on, come on, come on. We're gonna be late! Come on!>
Morning. I know you have to deal with this house arrest stuff,>
but would you mind picking him up from school?>
I have an inspection I can't get out of.>
Yeah. Sure. I just have to tell my probation guy.>
Okay. Hey, hey, hey.>
Remember, just don't talk too fast.>
What you did last night was brilliant.>
"For Whom The Bell Tolls. Today, it tolls for me.">
That's gonna be a good presentation.>
- All right, bye-bye. Break a leg. - Come on.>
Let's go before they lock us out.>
- Want me to carry that? - Sure.>
You know, when Hemingway was my age,>
you know what his parents got him for his birthday?>
No, what?>
His dad got him a shotgun,>
and his mom, a violin.>
- Hemingway played the violin? - No.>
Fifty years later, he used that shotgun to-->
Really?>
Look it up.>
Wow. I did not know that.>
Well, guess who's getting violin lessons.>
[Max chuckles]>
Oh, buddy, I'm so happy you're excited about this school, huh?>
- Finally got it right. - Yeah.>
Mom was right.>
Can't you cover that thing with your sock?>
What? I don't like the way it feels on my skin.>
- Texture thing, you know? - It's blinking.>
- Beep. - Okay. You know what?>
Are you gonna bring it in?>
Fine.>
You can go now.>
Okay.>
Have a good day.>
[uplifting music plays]>
[♪]>
Remember, the last time this guy was here, he got arrested.>
[Guillermo] Oh, wow.>
- Max? - [Max] Jimmy?>
- Hey, man. How you doing? - Man, you look great.>
Great to have you here. This is Guillermo.>
- Hi. Nice to meet you. - Top security guy.>
- How's your son doing? - Ezzie's great, man, yeah.>
He'd be here, but you know, I can't take him out of the state.>
[laughs] Yeah, right. Guess not. Yeah, I guess he can't.>
So, I was telling him, remember the last time Max was here,>
he was almost on the show, but he got arrested.>
He, um, rescued his son from school.>
- Yeah? - That's how I see it.>
- [Jimmy] Yeah. - Yeah.>
But, uh, anyway, it's great to have you here.>
- [toilet flushing] - [Max] Sorry about that.>
I forgot to tell you.>
I gotta bring-- I had to bring my probation officer with me.>
- This is your probation officer? - Yeah.>
Wow.>
[Max] Yeah.>
- He has to stay with you all the time? - Yeah.>
- [Guillermo] He's very cute. - Hey, man. What's up?>
I'll be right here, all right?>
At least he's a good-looking guy.>
- All right, well, break a leg. - [Max] Okay.>
- [Jimmy] Glad you're finally here. - [Guillermo] Safety first.>
- Yeah. Thanks. - Yeah, that's true.>
- I'll see you out there. - Okay. See you.>
["Ezra" by Rae Isla plays]>
♪ I remember that shirt you had ♪>
♪ Bought the same one So we would match ♪>
♪ Snuck into your bedroom Window ♪>
♪ Footprints let us go>
♪ You wear a wig and glasses>
♪ I smoke and hide the ashes>
♪ I'll carry you downfield>
♪ Code only yours to reveal>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra>
♪ We'll sing the words To your song ♪>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra>
♪ You don't have to right What's wrong ♪>
♪ And in the morning Can't you see ♪>
♪ The sun is coming up For you ♪>
♪ Your timing's never Too soon ♪>
♪ Everybody needs a light>
[whistling]>
♪ We're dancing in the car>
♪ We're fighting after dark>
♪ But when the sun comes up>
♪ I'm glad to be kids like us>
♪ I hope you one day You learn ♪>
♪ I'm here to ease the burn>
♪ Growing up never ends>
♪ But we won't break, We'll bend ♪>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra ♪>
♪ We'll sing the words To your song ♪>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra>
♪ You don't have to right What's wrong ♪>
♪ And in the morning Can't you see ♪>
♪ The sun is coming up For you ♪>
♪ Your timing's never Too soon ♪>
♪ Everybody needs a light>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra>
♪ We'll sing the words To your song ♪>
♪ So let yourself be Ezra>
♪ You don't have to right What's wrong ♪>
♪ And in the morning Can't you see ♪>
♪ The sun is coming up For you ♪>
♪ Your timing's never Too soon ♪>
♪ Everybody needs>
♪ A light>
[whistling]>
[song ends]>
[dramatic music plays]>
[music ends]>