1 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,613 Herb! 2 00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:10,300 - Uh... - CHARLES: Hello! Hello! 3 00:02:10,163 --> 00:02:12,332 - Is this... Are we here? - Herb! 4 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,135 Herb! 5 00:02:16,369 --> 00:02:18,380 Herb! 6 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,375 There he is! Herb McGwyer! 7 00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:24,944 I've got you on! 8 00:02:25,111 --> 00:02:26,646 I've got you on now, Herb! 9 00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,784 Fancy a listen?! 10 00:02:31,551 --> 00:02:33,653 First sign of madness. 11 00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:35,789 Dearie me. 12 00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,290 Oh! You made it okay?! 13 00:02:37,390 --> 00:02:38,825 I can't hear you! 14 00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:41,127 You got here okay?! 15 00:02:41,294 --> 00:02:42,295 Well, yeah, obviously. 16 00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,130 Of course you did! 17 00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:46,900 No nasty, uh... the dreaded in-flight meal? 18 00:02:47,670 --> 00:02:48,368 Is there not, like, 19 00:02:48,535 --> 00:02:50,236 - a harbor... here? - Is there not a harbor? 20 00:02:50,403 --> 00:02:51,871 Well, no! 21 00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:53,373 It's sort of nature's harbor, really. 22 00:02:53,406 --> 00:02:54,874 - It's, um... - Okay... 23 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:56,743 I can kind of carry you through the shallows. 24 00:02:56,810 --> 00:02:58,578 - Um, can you maybe, um... - I'm Charles. 25 00:02:58,745 --> 00:03:00,130 - Charles Heath. - ...take a bag? 26 00:03:00,460 --> 00:03:01,810 - Of course. - Thanks. 27 00:03:01,247 --> 00:03:02,482 Take it. 28 00:03:02,582 --> 00:03:04,584 Load me up. Load me up, buttercup. 29 00:03:04,751 --> 00:03:06,720 - There it is. The old axe. - Quickly, please. It's heavy. 30 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:08,254 - That's fantastic. - Can you take it, please? 31 00:03:08,321 --> 00:03:09,923 - Of course. Absolutely. - Thank you. 32 00:03:10,900 --> 00:03:11,825 Yes, please. The axe. 33 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,261 - Love that. - Okay. S-So... 34 00:03:15,395 --> 00:03:17,163 Massive fan of your work, obviously. 35 00:03:17,263 --> 00:03:19,650 -So what do I do? -Thanks for coming. Oh, I'll grab this. 36 00:03:19,650 --> 00:03:21,101 No, no, no, no, no! No! 37 00:03:21,267 --> 00:03:23,269 Herb. Okay. 38 00:03:23,403 --> 00:03:25,505 - Right. Here. - I'm so sorry, Herb. - 39 00:03:25,605 --> 00:03:27,507 - Get my... Can you get my bag?! - Get everything, isn't it? 40 00:03:27,507 --> 00:03:29,209 Get everything. Keep it dry. 41 00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:31,770 - Okay, we're good. Close... - We're good? 42 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:34,140 Well, "close shave," I was going to say, not "we're good." 43 00:03:34,114 --> 00:03:35,749 Right. Are you all right? 44 00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:37,250 - You're wet. Oh, bugger me. - No. I mean, I... 45 00:03:37,283 --> 00:03:38,284 It's 'cause I was... 46 00:03:38,451 --> 00:03:40,520 pissing about with the guitar. 47 00:03:40,854 --> 00:03:44,240 Oh, I'm so s... Welcome to Wallis Island. 48 00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:47,193 You don't travel light, do you, you musicians? 49 00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:52,650 Well, this is the island. 50 00:03:52,198 --> 00:03:54,801 I shall show you around it as we go along, really. 51 00:03:57,203 --> 00:03:59,406 We have actually met, Herb. 52 00:03:59,472 --> 00:04:01,374 You may not, um... 53 00:04:01,474 --> 00:04:03,760 Colchester Corn Exchange. 54 00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:06,246 - Come on. - The glamour. Stage door, 2008. 55 00:04:06,312 --> 00:04:08,214 My, um... 56 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:10,750 Marie, a woman about... 57 00:04:10,884 --> 00:04:12,385 yea high, 58 00:04:12,485 --> 00:04:14,154 and a man about... 59 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,156 well, me, so... 60 00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:17,824 with her. 61 00:04:18,825 --> 00:04:20,930 Um... 62 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:21,494 Yeah, I meet a lot of people. 63 00:04:21,628 --> 00:04:23,797 Course you do. Popular man. 64 00:04:24,464 --> 00:04:26,166 Popular man. 65 00:04:28,335 --> 00:04:29,336 How far is it? 66 00:04:29,402 --> 00:04:30,670 - Huh? - How far is it? 67 00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:32,806 Oh, not too far. 68 00:04:37,143 --> 00:04:39,790 Can they not send a car? 69 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:42,148 - They? - Um, Wallis Lodge, 70 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,984 - my hotel. - Wallis Lodge, my house? 71 00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,754 And your hotel. Yes, exactly. 72 00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:49,220 This week. 73 00:04:49,155 --> 00:04:51,191 A hotel in all but name. 74 00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:52,359 And, um... 75 00:04:52,525 --> 00:04:55,829 and, um, facilities. 76 00:04:56,763 --> 00:04:57,764 - You... - You? 77 00:04:57,864 --> 00:04:59,265 I-I need to call my people. 78 00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:00,967 Ooh. 79 00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,135 Love that. 80 00:05:02,202 --> 00:05:04,104 Calling his people. 81 00:05:13,213 --> 00:05:15,115 My humble abode. 82 00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:25,725 Ooh, no, you don't need to take your shoes off, Herb. 83 00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:26,993 Well, they're soaked. 84 00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,495 Oh, yes. From the sea. 85 00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:31,898 Let's get you nice and crisp and dry. 86 00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,734 I've got a world-class bath, by the way. 87 00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:36,403 Yes. 88 00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:37,904 Lion's feet on it. 89 00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:40,907 Not real, of course, but next best thing. 90 00:05:43,410 --> 00:05:46,460 Gig-wise, it won't exactly be Glasto. 91 00:05:46,146 --> 00:05:47,414 Glastonbury. 92 00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:49,149 Uh, yeah, that's-that's fine. 93 00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:51,251 I mean, I much prefer, you know, 94 00:05:51,251 --> 00:05:52,385 intimate gigs. 95 00:05:52,552 --> 00:05:53,887 Oh, God, yeah. 96 00:05:58,240 --> 00:05:59,325 Um, how many? 97 00:05:59,426 --> 00:06:00,727 - People? - Yeah. 98 00:06:00,894 --> 00:06:02,929 Well, less than a hundred. 99 00:06:05,980 --> 00:06:07,867 - Perfect. - Perfect. 100 00:06:08,100 --> 00:06:09,336 Yeah. 101 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:12,439 Bloody good effort this, Herb. 102 00:06:12,605 --> 00:06:15,275 Coming all the way out here without your roadies. 103 00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:17,344 - Just an acoustic set. - Eh. 104 00:06:17,444 --> 00:06:19,512 Why waste the money? Quite right. 105 00:06:19,679 --> 00:06:22,215 - Well, no, I didn't... - Which brings me on 106 00:06:22,282 --> 00:06:25,118 to the thorny issue of payment. 107 00:06:25,251 --> 00:06:28,922 - Hmm. -Oh, yeah, we don't need to do that now. 108 00:06:31,791 --> 00:06:32,959 It's bloody unseemly, in't it? 109 00:06:38,298 --> 00:06:39,766 - Cash? - Yes. 110 00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:41,868 Now, what I thought I'd do is give you 111 00:06:41,968 --> 00:06:43,370 £50 now 112 00:06:43,470 --> 00:06:45,872 and the other £499,950 113 00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:48,410 on completion of the gig. 114 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:50,243 If my maths is correct. 115 00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:53,646 Okay. 116 00:06:53,813 --> 00:06:55,615 Oh. 117 00:06:58,318 --> 00:07:00,286 A cool half million. 118 00:07:00,453 --> 00:07:02,489 Should keep you in guitar strings for a couple of years, 119 00:07:02,555 --> 00:07:04,124 you bloody mercenary. 120 00:07:04,224 --> 00:07:05,625 - Well, hang on. That's not... - No, I'm just... 121 00:07:05,658 --> 00:07:06,893 ...the reason I'm doing the gig. 122 00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:08,228 No. No, no, no. No, no, no. 123 00:07:08,328 --> 00:07:09,896 This is all jokes. 124 00:07:09,996 --> 00:07:10,997 I'm just joking. 125 00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:12,650 Jokes included. 126 00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:13,633 It's just, um... 127 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,602 I-I'm not really used to having guests. 128 00:07:15,735 --> 00:07:17,837 I'm just trying to get some atmos going. 129 00:07:17,837 --> 00:07:19,172 Uh, there's a case in point... 130 00:07:19,305 --> 00:07:20,974 I've made myself a tea and not you. 131 00:07:23,176 --> 00:07:25,745 Yeah, look, can I get changed, please? 132 00:07:25,912 --> 00:07:27,414 - It's... I'm drenched. - You are. 133 00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:29,182 Dame Judi. 134 00:07:29,349 --> 00:07:31,985 Dame Judi Drenched. 135 00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:39,759 Not many musicians come to the island, Herb. 136 00:07:39,859 --> 00:07:41,928 For obvious reasons, 137 00:07:42,950 --> 00:07:46,966 i.e. it is admittedly remote. 138 00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:50,303 And there are no stadiums or stadia. 139 00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:53,606 No boutique hotels. 140 00:07:53,773 --> 00:07:55,608 Well, no hotels. 141 00:07:55,775 --> 00:07:59,312 There's a sort of an unofficial campsite. 142 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:01,448 You can't exactly expect Mick Hucknall 143 00:08:01,614 --> 00:08:04,500 to slum it under canvas. 144 00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:08,455 Kate Bush came to the island. 145 00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:10,824 Herb. 146 00:08:11,791 --> 00:08:13,793 But I think that was more as a retreat, 147 00:08:13,893 --> 00:08:17,630 rather than as part of a tour. 148 00:08:17,731 --> 00:08:20,166 She needed some peace and quiet. 149 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,235 And that we can offer. 150 00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:30,910 - Yes. That's the beauty of this island. - 151 00:08:31,770 --> 00:08:32,846 The silence. 152 00:08:32,912 --> 00:08:34,514 And, of course, the beauty. 153 00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:37,984 It is a bloody beautiful island. 154 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:39,519 You're in here. 155 00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:43,256 - Okay, well, can you, um... - Yes. 156 00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:44,891 Mm-hmm. Oh, by the way, 157 00:08:45,250 --> 00:08:46,893 you've absolutely timed the *** off this, Herb. 158 00:08:46,993 --> 00:08:48,495 Seaman's Day on Sunday. 159 00:08:48,595 --> 00:08:50,960 Always a highlight. 160 00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,650 Yeah, I'm just gonna lay low until the gig. 161 00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:55,335 - Thank you. - Now, this tap doesn't work. 162 00:08:57,103 --> 00:08:59,500 - Well, it does work. - Yes, it does work. 163 00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:01,700 It works, but it sort of works... 164 00:09:01,174 --> 00:09:02,709 too well, if you know what I mean. 165 00:09:02,842 --> 00:09:04,110 That used to sort of drip-drip. 166 00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:05,345 And now that... 167 00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:06,613 more gushes. 168 00:09:06,780 --> 00:09:09,490 Yes. Sorry again. If... 169 00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:13,119 If these are too baggy or daggy for you. 170 00:09:13,286 --> 00:09:14,554 On the plus side, 171 00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:16,556 I have here in my hand a Winona. 172 00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:17,691 A what? 173 00:09:17,757 --> 00:09:18,792 A Winona rider. 174 00:09:18,958 --> 00:09:19,959 - Your rider. - Okay. 175 00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:21,928 You are now the proud Winona 176 00:09:22,950 --> 00:09:23,863 of a rider. 177 00:09:24,300 --> 00:09:25,298 You've got yourself... 178 00:09:25,465 --> 00:09:27,934 your favorite apples, 179 00:09:28,340 --> 00:09:29,536 Braeburn thereof, 180 00:09:29,636 --> 00:09:31,371 times three. 181 00:09:31,871 --> 00:09:34,400 Monster Munch, Pickled Onion. 182 00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:36,576 Don't go snogging the ladies. 183 00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:40,113 And, uh, of course, some whiskey. 184 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:43,950 And it has to be the Johnnie Walker Blue Label. 185 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:46,453 Just a few things that you've expressed a fondness for 186 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:47,954 - in, um... - Interviews. 187 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,223 In the past. And, of course, 188 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:52,225 the Galliard Blonde. 189 00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:53,660 Oh. Yeah, I, um... 190 00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:55,562 - I-I don't smoke anymore, dude. - No. 191 00:09:55,662 --> 00:09:57,330 But you waver. 192 00:09:57,497 --> 00:09:59,232 You waver, don't you? 193 00:09:59,833 --> 00:10:01,267 Have you got rice? 194 00:10:02,168 --> 00:10:03,670 Do you normally get rice? 195 00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:04,904 For my phone. 196 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:06,773 Does your phone get rice? What? 197 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:09,175 It'll soak up the water from the sea. 198 00:10:09,342 --> 00:10:10,910 - Will it, now? - Well, it can do, yeah. 199 00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:12,812 Okay. You're not just a pretty face, are you? 200 00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,481 - Charles. - Yas. 201 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,160 Can I get some rice? I need to make some calls. 202 00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:17,484 Amazing sentence. Yes, you can. 203 00:10:17,584 --> 00:10:18,785 I'm going down to the shop in a second. 204 00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:19,853 - I need to pick up a hog. - Okay. 205 00:10:19,919 --> 00:10:21,287 - A what? - The hog. 206 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,289 Ich bin ordered ein hog. Oink, oink. 207 00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:25,625 - Okay. - Okay. 208 00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:28,328 Well... 209 00:10:28,495 --> 00:10:29,796 shall I plod on, Macduff? 210 00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,765 Yeah. Can you just shut the door? 211 00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,330 Absolutely. 212 00:10:41,410 --> 00:10:43,176 I... No, I meant... 213 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:46,446 - Oh, my God. - I'm so sorry, Herb. -Yeah. 214 00:10:46,546 --> 00:10:47,947 That's inexcusable. 215 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:50,500 I'm sorry, Herb. That's crazy. 216 00:10:50,183 --> 00:10:51,785 All right. 217 00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:53,119 I'm not at the races. 218 00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:10,837 So go on then, Herb. Out with it. 219 00:11:10,970 --> 00:11:13,807 What happened with you and Nell Mortimer? 220 00:11:13,973 --> 00:11:16,309 Um... 221 00:11:16,643 --> 00:11:18,645 Yeah, I'm quite a private person, to be honest. 222 00:11:18,745 --> 00:11:19,813 No, I know you are. 223 00:11:19,913 --> 00:11:21,314 But go on. What happened? 224 00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,383 Because some sources say that you dumped her. 225 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,652 Some sources say that she dumped you. 226 00:11:25,752 --> 00:11:27,554 So come on. 227 00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:28,855 - Who dumped who? - No, it wasn't... 228 00:11:28,888 --> 00:11:30,156 Whom dumped whom? 229 00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:31,825 It was... it was a mutual decision. 230 00:11:31,925 --> 00:11:34,361 Some of the best are. Some of the best are. 231 00:11:34,494 --> 00:11:36,960 And now we're sort of... 232 00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:38,431 all good, huh? Amicable? 233 00:11:39,666 --> 00:11:41,768 I'm sorry. I'm prying. 234 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:44,104 It's just I love that... 235 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:46,720 What do you call it? An era? 236 00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:48,708 The early stuff. You and her. 237 00:11:48,842 --> 00:11:50,510 -Some of my favorite stuff, I have to say. -Yeah, okay. 238 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,612 I think my solo stuff's more varied. 239 00:11:52,746 --> 00:11:54,114 Musically. 240 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:55,949 Mm, mm. 241 00:11:57,517 --> 00:11:59,252 The harmonies? 242 00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:03,556 And I'm very proud of my new album, so... 243 00:12:03,623 --> 00:12:06,893 Which I cannot wait to listen to on the night. 244 00:12:07,270 --> 00:12:08,428 Not exclusively. 245 00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:10,930 As part of a balanced program, of course. 246 00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:13,967 - Where is the shop, man? - The shop is down thar. 247 00:12:29,490 --> 00:12:31,985 Yes. Bit of a, um, Aladdin's cave. 248 00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:34,154 Fishing net. 249 00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:40,894 Uh... 250 00:12:41,227 --> 00:12:42,996 Why? -AMANDA: 'Cause you won't do it. 251 00:12:42,996 --> 00:12:44,631 You'll get... You'll leave everything out 252 00:12:44,664 --> 00:12:46,633 -and expect me to put it all away. -Mum, please. 253 00:12:50,303 --> 00:12:52,105 Sorry about that. 254 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:54,441 New balls, please. 255 00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:55,675 You must be hungry. 256 00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:56,943 Hmm? 257 00:12:57,110 --> 00:12:58,745 No. But not to eat. The... 258 00:12:58,912 --> 00:12:59,913 Uh, no, no. 259 00:13:00,130 --> 00:13:01,414 I meant, uh... 260 00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:02,916 Ooh. 261 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:04,984 O-kay. 262 00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:06,152 There she is. 263 00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:07,654 Oink. 264 00:13:07,754 --> 00:13:09,522 Will you be needing the barrow? 265 00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:12,525 - Oh, God, yeah. - Sorry, um, do you sell rice? 266 00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:15,695 Uh, we've got pasta. 267 00:13:15,862 --> 00:13:16,863 N-No. It has to be rice. 268 00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,164 It has to be rice, apparently. 269 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:19,666 What are you making? 270 00:13:19,833 --> 00:13:21,334 No, it's-it's for my phone. 271 00:13:21,434 --> 00:13:22,802 It got wet. 272 00:13:23,603 --> 00:13:24,604 Right. 273 00:13:24,704 --> 00:13:25,872 Yeah. 274 00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:28,775 I still don't understand. Sorry. 275 00:13:28,875 --> 00:13:30,343 Welcome to my world. 276 00:13:30,477 --> 00:13:34,347 Uh, well, there's a-a-a payphone outside. 277 00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,160 Great. 278 00:13:37,450 --> 00:13:39,285 - He's a musician. - Oh. 279 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:40,987 Ooh, you've got rice pudding though. 280 00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:42,989 - Yes. - Hmm. 281 00:13:46,493 --> 00:13:48,962 I need some more money. For the phone. 282 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:50,363 Some change. 283 00:13:51,464 --> 00:13:53,330 Will you just get me some change? 284 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,680 - I'm about to run out. - That's a 50. 285 00:13:55,635 --> 00:13:57,303 Oh, hi. Um... 286 00:13:57,470 --> 00:14:00,573 Can, uh... can you put me through to Zeb Loman, please? 287 00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,760 Herb McGwyer. 288 00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,912 I don't want tickets for Herb McGwyer. 289 00:14:06,460 --> 00:14:07,814 I am Herb McGwyer. 290 00:14:09,150 --> 00:14:11,418 Saying my own name isn't name-dropping. 291 00:14:13,530 --> 00:14:14,854 Well, okay. Uh, when will he be free? 292 00:14:15,755 --> 00:14:16,756 Can you find out? 293 00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:18,591 Hang on. 294 00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:22,896 Um... 295 00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:25,980 You changed the whole thing? 296 00:14:25,980 --> 00:14:26,433 Yeah. 297 00:14:30,103 --> 00:14:32,605 Okay, well, just, uh, yeah, go in the meeting. 298 00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,374 Can you shut the door? 299 00:14:34,441 --> 00:14:36,176 No, not you. Sorry. Can you... can you shut the door? 300 00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,410 Thank you. No, not you. 301 00:14:37,544 --> 00:14:39,120 It's not shut. 302 00:14:40,613 --> 00:14:42,682 Can you shut... What kind of meeting is it? 303 00:14:42,782 --> 00:14:44,684 Can you... 304 00:14:44,951 --> 00:14:46,886 I'm calling back in the morning. 305 00:14:47,530 --> 00:14:49,589 Yes, exactly. Stretch the old "leegs." 306 00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:53,760 See if you can't breathe some life into the old, uh, iPhone. 307 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,628 Yeah, I mean, rice pudding definitely won't work. 308 00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:58,465 Well, not with that attitude, no, it won't. 309 00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,633 Ah! Now, then! 310 00:15:02,350 --> 00:15:03,903 The scene of the crime! The venue! 311 00:15:05,805 --> 00:15:08,241 - Where? - It's down yar. 312 00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:10,243 It's not finished yet, of course. 313 00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:11,444 We still need to... 314 00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:12,545 roll out the barrel. 315 00:15:12,712 --> 00:15:14,414 But that is the, uh... 316 00:15:14,547 --> 00:15:16,820 It's not ready yet, Herb. 317 00:15:16,249 --> 00:15:18,985 It's not... it's not finished yet! 318 00:15:21,454 --> 00:15:23,490 This isn't where the gig is. 319 00:15:23,823 --> 00:15:26,226 Well, you're half right. It is where the gig is. 320 00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:30,597 Where will the audience be? 321 00:15:30,730 --> 00:15:32,165 Oh, no, I'll just... 322 00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:34,670 You just concentrate on what you do best... 323 00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,336 playing your wonderful music. 324 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,400 And I'll concentrate on what I do best... 325 00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:40,600 sort of sitting on a pallet. 326 00:15:40,173 --> 00:15:41,574 But, I mean... 327 00:15:41,675 --> 00:15:43,410 I mean, there's no... How do you... 328 00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:45,845 - how do you ticket this? - Don't worry about that. 329 00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:48,915 You said there'd be a hundred. 330 00:15:49,150 --> 00:15:50,483 No. 331 00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:52,519 - No, no, no, no, no. - Well, yeah, you did. 332 00:15:52,686 --> 00:15:54,354 No, fair's fair. No, I did not say there'd be a hundred. 333 00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,220 - Yeah, you did. - No, I didn't. 334 00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:58,792 I said there'd be less than a hundred. 335 00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:05,699 How many less than a hundred? 336 00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:09,202 Well, just as in... 337 00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:12,205 As in? 338 00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:17,544 Is it just you? 339 00:16:18,545 --> 00:16:19,946 Yeah. 340 00:16:22,282 --> 00:16:23,717 Right. 341 00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:26,553 Are we wandering back up, are we? 342 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,888 Are we wandering... 343 00:16:29,889 --> 00:16:31,391 Now, set list-wise, 344 00:16:31,558 --> 00:16:34,227 of course, absolutementup to you. 345 00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:36,663 Well, I do have a few faves I wouldn't mind seeing 346 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:38,531 scuttling around, and he who pays the piper 347 00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:40,166 must have some control over 348 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:41,901 - what the piper pipes. - What do you do? 349 00:16:41,968 --> 00:16:44,304 - Hmm? - You a banker? 350 00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:46,720 Or oil? It's oil, isn't it? 351 00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:47,907 - I-I... I'm retired. - 'Cause I'm not 352 00:16:48,740 --> 00:16:50,677 playing a private gig for some oil tycoon or whatever. 353 00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:52,245 - Where's oil come from? - I'm... You know, 354 00:16:52,312 --> 00:16:53,680 I'm-I'm anti-corporate, famously. 355 00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:55,215 I'm anti-corporate. 356 00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:57,417 Believe me, I hate bloody, um... 357 00:16:57,584 --> 00:16:59,552 Well, I can't think of one, but... 358 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:01,388 - 'Cause, you know... - IKEA. Bad example. 359 00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:03,590 I thought it was a group of fans all clubbing together. 360 00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:05,592 No. One fan. Clubbing alone. 361 00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:08,361 Right, so, I need to know what you do. 362 00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:10,663 -You have every right to know what I do. -Thank you. 363 00:17:10,764 --> 00:17:12,198 Right. 364 00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:14,868 I did... was a male nurse. 365 00:17:15,350 --> 00:17:16,770 Nurse. 366 00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:21,740 S... Okay, where's the money come from? 367 00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,449 - You won? - Indeed we did, yes, 368 00:17:29,616 --> 00:17:31,251 we bloody won the thing. Yup. 369 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,787 - And it changed everything. - Well, yeah. 370 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:35,889 Course it did, yeah. 371 00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:37,791 The world was our oyster. 372 00:17:37,957 --> 00:17:39,559 We got to travel the globe. 373 00:17:39,693 --> 00:17:41,227 We did Asia. 374 00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:42,796 That's what they say, isn't it? "Did." 375 00:17:42,796 --> 00:17:44,640 Who, uh... 376 00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:45,765 Well, you know, the globetrotters. 377 00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:47,434 - You know, um... - I mean, who's "we"? 378 00:17:47,534 --> 00:17:49,969 Palin. Alan Whicker. 379 00:17:50,136 --> 00:17:52,405 We did China. We did Malaysia. 380 00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:54,874 Kathmandu was very much a case of Kathman-did. 381 00:17:55,410 --> 00:17:57,644 Italy. Antigua. Tokyo. 382 00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:59,245 That's not the route, of course, that's just 383 00:17:59,279 --> 00:18:01,748 some of the places we visited, really. 384 00:18:02,148 --> 00:18:04,984 And then one day, of course, it had run out. 385 00:18:06,860 --> 00:18:07,554 And there we were. 386 00:18:07,654 --> 00:18:10,423 Hungover and suntanned. 387 00:18:10,557 --> 00:18:13,827 With precisely two-thirds of diddly-squat to our name. 388 00:18:18,264 --> 00:18:20,166 Okay. So, sorry, I don't understand. 389 00:18:20,333 --> 00:18:22,435 How come you're a millionaire now? 390 00:18:22,569 --> 00:18:24,400 Mm. 391 00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:25,672 So... 392 00:18:25,839 --> 00:18:27,340 Played it again. 393 00:18:27,474 --> 00:18:29,809 And won it again. 394 00:18:29,976 --> 00:18:33,130 And decided to save it. 395 00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:35,415 Wasn't much interested in traveling anymore. 396 00:18:35,515 --> 00:18:37,650 Not on my tod, anyway. Um... 397 00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:40,186 after Marie, um... I mean... 398 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,255 Uh, you-you won the lottery twice? 399 00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:45,358 Did indeed. Bought this place. Hmm. 400 00:18:45,525 --> 00:18:48,695 Just me. My money. 401 00:18:50,130 --> 00:18:52,465 And your beautiful music. 402 00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:57,804 7, 11, 18, 403 00:18:57,871 --> 00:19:03,430 27, 45 and 48. 404 00:19:03,376 --> 00:19:05,445 The significance being those were the winning numbers. 405 00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:06,846 - Yeah. - Yeah. 406 00:19:07,130 --> 00:19:08,615 - I mean, obviously. - I mean, obviously. 407 00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:13,787 Two pounds well spent. 408 00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:24,164 The great Herb McGwyer. 409 00:19:24,230 --> 00:19:25,965 1981 to... 410 00:19:26,660 --> 00:19:28,368 Well, who knows? TBC. 411 00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:30,470 Or, put it another way, 412 00:19:30,570 --> 00:19:32,720 Chris Pinner. 413 00:19:32,238 --> 00:19:34,240 For the first 20 years of your life, Chris Pinner. 414 00:19:34,407 --> 00:19:36,242 - No? Don't like it? - Not really, no. 415 00:19:36,409 --> 00:19:38,345 No. All right. 416 00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:40,847 Well, I shall avoid calling you the C-word. 417 00:19:41,140 --> 00:19:43,490 As in "Chris." Well, as in either. 418 00:19:43,216 --> 00:19:44,651 Cheese. 419 00:19:44,751 --> 00:19:46,252 - That's lovely, that. - Sorry, can you, um, 420 00:19:46,252 --> 00:19:47,420 can you delete those, please? 421 00:19:47,554 --> 00:19:48,855 - Um... - I mean, they'll just be 422 00:19:48,922 --> 00:19:51,925 - for my, um... for my annals. - Oh? 423 00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:54,940 Well, this'll just be for... well, for me. 424 00:19:58,398 --> 00:20:00,533 Oh. Goes right through you, then? 425 00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:04,104 That's the phrase I'm after. 426 00:20:04,270 --> 00:20:05,939 When was the last time you, um, 427 00:20:06,106 --> 00:20:07,707 c-collaborated with Nell or, you know, 428 00:20:07,841 --> 00:20:09,576 - played together? - Um, 429 00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:11,444 well, I don't know, man, like, ten years ago. 430 00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:14,114 "Sunday Best." Radio 6 did a thing on us. 431 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:15,915 - Yes, with Gideon Coe. - Yeah. 432 00:20:16,490 --> 00:20:18,952 Well, listen here, Herb. Just in terms 433 00:20:19,850 --> 00:20:20,720 of the "pluffman's..." 434 00:20:20,854 --> 00:20:22,922 - Dig in. You know... - Uh... 435 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:24,724 - Ploughman's. Have so... - Yeah, I can't 436 00:20:24,891 --> 00:20:27,127 eat four types of cheese directly before bed. 437 00:20:27,293 --> 00:20:29,295 - Quattro formaggio? - Yeah, it's... it's late, man. 438 00:20:29,429 --> 00:20:30,797 I think I'm gonna, um, hit the hay. 439 00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,470 I've opened the jeroboam now. 440 00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:39,906 I'm good. 441 00:20:40,730 --> 00:20:42,375 - Oh. - Thanks. 442 00:20:42,709 --> 00:20:45,780 And, just, Nell-wise, just broken record-wise, 443 00:20:45,211 --> 00:20:47,247 - I mean, you'd be okay if... - Can you-can you just 444 00:20:47,313 --> 00:20:50,583 stop prying? Okay? 445 00:20:50,717 --> 00:20:52,986 I know. "Pryawatha." 446 00:20:54,540 --> 00:20:56,560 Yeah. I will. 447 00:20:56,156 --> 00:20:57,991 - It's just because... - It's, please... It's... 448 00:20:58,910 --> 00:21:01,761 Listen, it's water under the bridge, okay? 449 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:03,496 Okay. 450 00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:06,666 Perfect. 451 00:21:24,317 --> 00:21:25,518 He's everywhere. 452 00:21:25,685 --> 00:21:27,120 It's like he's man marking me. 453 00:21:27,253 --> 00:21:29,220 No, there's no party. 454 00:21:29,155 --> 00:21:31,358 No. It's... I'm literally playing. 455 00:21:31,491 --> 00:21:33,360 To one... to one guy. 456 00:21:33,526 --> 00:21:35,995 Of course I'll do it. I mean, it's paying for the album. 457 00:21:36,129 --> 00:21:37,530 You know, take the money, do the gig, 458 00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,933 take out a restraining order. 459 00:21:40,330 --> 00:21:41,935 I'm serious, Zeb, this is Misery. 460 00:21:42,350 --> 00:21:43,436 I'm gonna wake up with no ankles. 461 00:21:43,536 --> 00:21:45,638 No, he's fine. Honestly, he's quite... 462 00:21:45,772 --> 00:21:48,541 He's sort of... he's sort of sweet, in a way. 463 00:21:48,675 --> 00:21:51,711 I mean, he's a sap, obviously, but he's... 464 00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:53,146 I feel kind of badly for the guy. 465 00:21:53,213 --> 00:21:54,681 Oh, hang on. 466 00:21:54,848 --> 00:21:56,850 Oh. Yeah, send me the latest artwork. 467 00:21:56,983 --> 00:21:59,520 I'll-I'll try and get online and, um... 468 00:21:59,185 --> 00:22:00,720 Oh, my God, this is unbelievable. 469 00:22:00,887 --> 00:22:02,722 Here he is. He's crazy, man. 470 00:22:02,889 --> 00:22:06,359 Yeah. He's literally just come waddling past right now. 471 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:10,630 Um... I've... I've got to go. Hang on. 472 00:22:10,230 --> 00:22:12,565 Charles. Is that... 473 00:22:12,732 --> 00:22:14,334 Is Nell coming? 474 00:22:14,467 --> 00:22:15,835 Ah, Herb. Hello. 475 00:22:15,969 --> 00:22:17,303 - Did you... - Good phone call? Decent? 476 00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:19,205 - Did you invite Nell? - Eh... 477 00:22:19,305 --> 00:22:22,175 But, uh... Yeah. She's, um... 478 00:22:23,430 --> 00:22:24,344 Oh. 479 00:22:26,646 --> 00:22:28,248 Oh, shit. 480 00:22:29,215 --> 00:22:31,518 In a good way or... 481 00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:34,854 - Why didn't you tell me? - I did try to, last night. 482 00:22:34,988 --> 00:22:36,560 - But before that. - Because we were... 483 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:37,590 Your trousers were all wet. 484 00:22:37,724 --> 00:22:39,359 - Before I got here, I mean. - She confirmed late. 485 00:22:39,392 --> 00:22:40,894 - It's okay. Is it? - What? No. 486 00:22:41,270 --> 00:22:42,896 - What? - No. 487 00:22:43,290 --> 00:22:44,764 With... 488 00:22:44,864 --> 00:22:47,600 Nell and... you and Nell and Michael. 489 00:22:49,369 --> 00:22:50,603 Who's Michael? 490 00:22:51,705 --> 00:22:53,606 Her husband. 491 00:22:55,241 --> 00:22:57,711 You were saying "water under the bridge." 492 00:22:58,511 --> 00:23:00,113 - You did say. - Yeah, as in 493 00:23:00,246 --> 00:23:02,248 "it was a long time ago," not as in... 494 00:23:02,415 --> 00:23:03,683 - Yeah. - "It's okay." 495 00:23:03,850 --> 00:23:04,951 - It was a long time ago. - It's not okay. 496 00:23:04,951 --> 00:23:06,553 - I know. Is it not? - No. 497 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,188 Not really. 498 00:23:09,856 --> 00:23:12,292 I need to, um... 499 00:23:15,295 --> 00:23:16,763 Hey, hey! 500 00:23:16,863 --> 00:23:19,466 - The welcoming party. - Hello, hello! 501 00:23:19,632 --> 00:23:21,601 - Hi, Herb. - Ah! Thank you, Peter. 502 00:23:21,768 --> 00:23:23,136 Yeah, thanks-thanks, but no thanks, Peter. 503 00:23:23,136 --> 00:23:24,371 That was a bit of a bumpy ride. 504 00:23:24,471 --> 00:23:25,805 - Oh. Oh, dear! - Oh. 505 00:23:25,905 --> 00:23:27,607 - Oh! Easy, baby, easy. - Careful, now. 506 00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:28,975 Careful on the shingles. 507 00:23:30,944 --> 00:23:32,479 McGwyer, Mortimer. 508 00:23:32,645 --> 00:23:34,247 Mortimer, McGwyer. 509 00:23:34,414 --> 00:23:36,416 - Straub-Hodder is the, -It's my marr... 510 00:23:36,549 --> 00:23:37,984 - uh, married name. - Oh. 511 00:23:38,151 --> 00:23:39,452 - It's not Mortimer anymore. - Ooh. 512 00:23:39,452 --> 00:23:41,821 - Love that. Yeah. - Herb! 513 00:23:41,955 --> 00:23:43,957 It's great to finally meet you, bud. Come on! 514 00:23:45,592 --> 00:23:47,127 - Yeah. Um, you're Michael. - Yeah. 515 00:23:47,293 --> 00:23:48,328 Last time I checked, 516 00:23:48,495 --> 00:23:49,496 - yeah. - Cool. 517 00:23:51,631 --> 00:23:53,967 - Okay. - Well, there we are. 518 00:23:54,134 --> 00:23:55,935 - Yeah. - Shall we, um... 519 00:23:56,690 --> 00:23:57,837 - Yep. - Let's, um... 520 00:23:59,806 --> 00:24:01,740 Shearwaters? Do you, uh, 521 00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:03,109 do you get any shearwaters here? 522 00:24:03,243 --> 00:24:04,944 Shearwaters? 523 00:24:05,111 --> 00:24:08,314 Again, Mike, I'm not exactly bird wise. 524 00:24:08,448 --> 00:24:09,816 I mean, uh, gulls, we have. 525 00:24:09,949 --> 00:24:11,651 - Seagulls. - What about auks? 526 00:24:11,785 --> 00:24:12,986 Do you get any auks here? 527 00:24:13,153 --> 00:24:14,854 Well, orcs don't exist, do they? 528 00:24:14,988 --> 00:24:17,230 As in... Are you talking, like, the sort of green trolls? 529 00:24:17,230 --> 00:24:19,920 Oh, no, no, no, no, I mean, like, uh... 530 00:24:19,192 --> 00:24:23,463 So, um, he, uh, he wants to play the old stuff. 531 00:24:23,630 --> 00:24:25,131 - Charles. - Ah. Yeah. 532 00:24:25,265 --> 00:24:28,100 I mean, I'm happy to say, you know, no. 533 00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:29,536 Okay. 534 00:24:31,204 --> 00:24:33,306 Well, th-that... that... some of that's 535 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:35,175 off limits, you know? 536 00:24:35,308 --> 00:24:37,143 I don't know how you... I mean, what... 537 00:24:37,310 --> 00:24:38,878 what-what do you think? 538 00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:40,447 Yeah, I figured he'd want the back catalogue. 539 00:24:40,447 --> 00:24:42,215 I mean, it's his party. 540 00:24:42,349 --> 00:24:44,351 - What's your problem? - Haven't got a problem. 541 00:24:44,484 --> 00:24:46,386 I'm just... It's... 542 00:24:46,519 --> 00:24:47,887 Would... I mean, that stuff 543 00:24:48,540 --> 00:24:49,556 is just from another time, isn't it? 544 00:24:49,723 --> 00:24:51,224 Yeah. 545 00:24:51,391 --> 00:24:53,893 So that's why it's fine, isn't it? 546 00:24:54,694 --> 00:24:56,196 Okay. Or... 547 00:24:56,329 --> 00:24:59,733 that's why it's not fine. You know? 548 00:25:01,234 --> 00:25:03,236 You knew I was coming, right? 549 00:25:04,471 --> 00:25:06,172 Yeah. 550 00:25:06,306 --> 00:25:07,741 Yeah. Why? 551 00:25:07,907 --> 00:25:09,576 Well, what did you think you'd be playing? 552 00:25:09,576 --> 00:25:10,910 If it was with me, you must have 553 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:12,512 - thought it would be our stuff. - No, no. Yeah. 554 00:25:12,512 --> 00:25:13,913 I know that. Yeah. I did. 555 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,820 Okay. 556 00:25:16,416 --> 00:25:18,840 No, it's just, I... It's fine. Forget it. 557 00:25:18,184 --> 00:25:19,886 It's not a big deal. I'm just saying... 558 00:25:20,530 --> 00:25:21,354 - I'm excited. - Yeah. I am. 559 00:25:21,488 --> 00:25:22,722 You know, you and me, 560 00:25:22,856 --> 00:25:24,891 - playing again. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 561 00:25:26,893 --> 00:25:29,950 All right. Here we are, then, 562 00:25:29,262 --> 00:25:30,930 - kids. - Shoes off? 563 00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:32,932 Uh, shoes on. Very much on. 564 00:25:33,660 --> 00:25:36,236 Oh, my God. I am literally in love 565 00:25:36,369 --> 00:25:38,104 - with your glazing, man. - Well, 566 00:25:38,238 --> 00:25:40,440 - thank you. - We've got you some... 567 00:25:40,573 --> 00:25:42,208 - Ooh. - Oh, no, no, no. 568 00:25:42,375 --> 00:25:43,743 - It's just a little... - Oh, you shouldn't have. 569 00:25:43,743 --> 00:25:45,211 - What is it? - Um, it's just a little 570 00:25:45,245 --> 00:25:46,613 something to say thank you for having us. 571 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:47,681 - What's this... chutney? - Yeah. 572 00:25:47,714 --> 00:25:49,150 Houston, we have chutney. 573 00:25:49,115 --> 00:25:50,550 And it's not a problem. 574 00:25:52,850 --> 00:25:53,553 "Nell's Chutney." 575 00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:55,455 - It's just a hobby, really. - Hobby? 576 00:25:55,555 --> 00:25:57,957 She has her own stall at the Portland farmers market. 577 00:25:58,910 --> 00:25:59,559 Wowee. Straight outta Portland! 578 00:25:59,726 --> 00:26:01,428 - Uh... - The Windy City. 579 00:26:01,561 --> 00:26:03,730 -No. No, no, that is, -No? What is... No. That's... 580 00:26:03,863 --> 00:26:05,632 - Chicago. We are Rose City. - That's Chicago. 581 00:26:06,399 --> 00:26:07,734 Rose City Limits. 582 00:26:07,801 --> 00:26:09,803 - Yes, sir. - Route 66. 583 00:26:09,969 --> 00:26:10,970 - Uh, Interstate 5. - Oh. 584 00:26:11,710 --> 00:26:12,305 It's, uh, the I-5. 585 00:26:12,439 --> 00:26:13,773 High five. Don't leave me hanging. 586 00:26:13,907 --> 00:26:15,141 Absolutely love that. 587 00:26:15,208 --> 00:26:16,710 Love having you here. 588 00:26:16,810 --> 00:26:18,244 - Love being here. - Fantastic. 589 00:26:31,491 --> 00:26:32,892 Uh, no. 590 00:26:32,992 --> 00:26:35,328 I mean, I... It was fun. I mean, not, you know, 591 00:26:35,495 --> 00:26:37,130 - annoying, obviously, having to. - Yeah. 592 00:26:37,263 --> 00:26:38,565 Relearn all the songs, but, um... 593 00:26:38,665 --> 00:26:40,166 - Bloody fantastic. - Yeah. 594 00:26:40,333 --> 00:26:43,503 Uh, I quite enjoyed it... playing music again. 595 00:26:43,670 --> 00:26:45,710 No offense here, but I didn't really, uh, listen to you guys, 596 00:26:45,105 --> 00:26:46,840 like, back in the day. 597 00:26:47,700 --> 00:26:48,441 - Oh, wow. Seriously? - Oh, no, that's-that's fine. 598 00:26:48,441 --> 00:26:49,976 I mean, I knew who she was when we met. 599 00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:51,678 But yeah, I've, um, heard the songs a lot 600 00:26:51,845 --> 00:26:53,413 these last few weeks and, um, yeah, 601 00:26:53,613 --> 00:26:56,349 some of them just really get in there. So, um, so, 602 00:26:56,483 --> 00:26:58,151 kudos to you-dos. 603 00:27:01,855 --> 00:27:04,190 Yeah, I mean, my music's quite different now. 604 00:27:04,357 --> 00:27:06,920 - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. - Yeah. Um... 605 00:27:06,126 --> 00:27:07,694 No, 'cause you-you've heard... 606 00:27:07,827 --> 00:27:09,129 - He's heard some of the, um... - I have, yeah. 607 00:27:09,162 --> 00:27:10,463 - Uh, the, um... - Collaborations. 608 00:27:10,597 --> 00:27:12,198 Yeah, the collabs. Um, uh, 609 00:27:12,332 --> 00:27:14,934 like the, uh... What's the... that "Work That Body"? 610 00:27:15,350 --> 00:27:17,103 - "Work the Body." - Oh, boy. That's the... 611 00:27:17,270 --> 00:27:18,772 - Yeah. That's the... - Well, 612 00:27:18,872 --> 00:27:20,607 - it is what it is. - So... 613 00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:22,609 Ideal. 614 00:27:24,878 --> 00:27:26,680 Yeah, I mean, I... that one 615 00:27:26,813 --> 00:27:29,490 is a bit more commercial, I guess. 616 00:27:29,215 --> 00:27:30,450 Commercial... is that a, um... 617 00:27:30,550 --> 00:27:31,985 - genre? - Mm. 618 00:27:32,118 --> 00:27:34,540 It... As in, it's, uh, it's a dance, 619 00:27:34,220 --> 00:27:35,555 big beat, kind of more mainstream. 620 00:27:35,689 --> 00:27:36,723 Pop. 621 00:27:36,823 --> 00:27:38,391 Goes the weasel. 622 00:27:38,558 --> 00:27:40,160 It's... "Commercial" is the catch-all term 623 00:27:40,193 --> 00:27:42,896 for a whole range of-of... It's-it's not... 624 00:27:42,996 --> 00:27:45,231 - I'm not commercial. - Of course. 625 00:27:45,365 --> 00:27:47,233 You're just getting paid 300 grand 626 00:27:47,367 --> 00:27:49,336 just to do a private gig, so, you know. 627 00:27:53,373 --> 00:27:56,376 Wha... What-what was the... that-that... 628 00:27:56,576 --> 00:27:59,746 Um, now... gonna help you to some... 629 00:27:59,879 --> 00:28:01,247 Uh, no, I'm-I'm, uh... 630 00:28:01,414 --> 00:28:04,584 Did you just tell him to shut up? 631 00:28:04,718 --> 00:28:06,386 Nah. 632 00:28:06,553 --> 00:28:08,655 Um, is it a case of "let's get ready to crumble"? 633 00:28:08,755 --> 00:28:10,156 Is he getting paid more than me? 634 00:28:10,256 --> 00:28:12,692 - Hmm? - Are you... 635 00:28:12,826 --> 00:28:14,694 Are you getting paid more than me? 636 00:28:16,329 --> 00:28:17,864 I d-I don't know what this guy's doing. 637 00:28:17,931 --> 00:28:19,599 How much you getting? How much you getting? 638 00:28:19,599 --> 00:28:21,434 Let's... I'm happy to just split the lot. 639 00:28:21,601 --> 00:28:22,736 No, I'm-I'm interested in how much more important a part 640 00:28:22,736 --> 00:28:23,937 of McGwyer Mortimer you are. 641 00:28:24,104 --> 00:28:25,772 Uh, 500. His... 642 00:28:25,905 --> 00:28:28,441 - His people wanted 500. - Right, see, it wasn't me. 643 00:28:28,608 --> 00:28:31,277 - I didn't n-negotiate. - It was the people. 644 00:28:31,411 --> 00:28:32,912 - The people. - Oh, for God... 645 00:28:33,460 --> 00:28:34,781 You don't have a manager anymore, yeah? 646 00:28:34,914 --> 00:28:36,216 It's different for you, you know. 647 00:28:36,216 --> 00:28:38,451 You're not, um, an artist now. 648 00:28:38,585 --> 00:28:40,860 I'm not an artist? 649 00:28:40,253 --> 00:28:42,288 As in... as... I'm still making albums. 650 00:28:42,455 --> 00:28:44,758 You know? You-you quit. And I wrote the songs. 651 00:28:44,891 --> 00:28:46,226 No, you didn't. Not all of them. 652 00:28:46,393 --> 00:28:48,280 Oh, come on, I wrote, like, you know, the... 653 00:28:48,940 --> 00:28:49,129 Good ones? 654 00:28:49,295 --> 00:28:50,463 "The majority," I was gonna say. 655 00:28:50,530 --> 00:28:51,965 No, like, 90%. 656 00:28:52,650 --> 00:28:53,967 I didn't quit. You made a solo album. 657 00:28:54,134 --> 00:28:55,802 Okay, and you didn't. 658 00:28:55,935 --> 00:28:57,370 So what do you want... Uh, this is... 659 00:28:57,470 --> 00:28:58,872 this is bullshit. 660 00:28:58,972 --> 00:29:00,306 I don't need it. Can you... 661 00:29:00,473 --> 00:29:01,975 Please, just stop playing our music, 662 00:29:02,750 --> 00:29:03,543 like, all the time? 663 00:29:03,710 --> 00:29:04,711 I will second that. 664 00:29:04,811 --> 00:29:06,279 And you can shut up as well. 665 00:29:06,446 --> 00:29:07,947 - Whoa, dude. - Really?! 666 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:09,315 - Come on. - Yeah. Actually, I'm going 667 00:29:09,315 --> 00:29:10,450 - to bed. - Okay, so, Herb, should we 668 00:29:10,483 --> 00:29:12,152 just clean up after you, then? 669 00:29:12,318 --> 00:29:14,870 No, Herb, you don't need to. 670 00:29:14,254 --> 00:29:15,655 - Oh, well, no, I'm gonna... - You don't need to. 671 00:29:15,655 --> 00:29:16,823 - I... - Fine. 672 00:29:16,990 --> 00:29:18,224 - Herb. - Honestly... 673 00:29:18,425 --> 00:29:20,427 Not in the wastepaper basket, man. 674 00:30:07,173 --> 00:30:09,420 Oh! Hell. 675 00:30:10,343 --> 00:30:11,478 - I mean... - Hello? 676 00:30:11,544 --> 00:30:12,946 - Hello, hello? - Oh. 677 00:30:13,460 --> 00:30:15,150 Oh, my God, Herb! 678 00:30:15,148 --> 00:30:16,983 What the bloody hell has happened here? 679 00:30:17,150 --> 00:30:18,385 I'm fine. 680 00:30:18,518 --> 00:30:19,552 - You fell. Again. - I know that. 681 00:30:19,652 --> 00:30:20,854 What are we gonna do with you? 682 00:30:20,854 --> 00:30:22,555 - Here. - Just... You left 683 00:30:22,689 --> 00:30:24,224 - crumble outside my door. - No, that was meant as food. 684 00:30:24,224 --> 00:30:26,126 - Yeah, I get that. Right. - Not as a hazard. 685 00:30:26,226 --> 00:30:27,394 Are you leaving? 686 00:30:27,527 --> 00:30:28,728 - No. - Yeah. 687 00:30:28,895 --> 00:30:30,196 Th-This is bullshit, okay? 688 00:30:30,330 --> 00:30:31,865 I d-I don't need this. 689 00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:33,333 Oh, come on, dude, you can't leave. 690 00:30:33,333 --> 00:30:35,201 No, he can't. You can't leave. 691 00:30:35,335 --> 00:30:36,690 - You're not leaving. - I'm not playing the old songs 692 00:30:36,202 --> 00:30:37,904 like some tribute band. 693 00:30:38,380 --> 00:30:39,806 Tribute to yourself band, though. 694 00:30:39,906 --> 00:30:41,508 That's not... that's not what I'm about. 695 00:30:41,574 --> 00:30:43,743 Well, thanks for discussing it with me first. 696 00:30:44,911 --> 00:30:47,800 Yeah, I didn't know you were gonna be here, okay? 697 00:30:47,213 --> 00:30:50,830 I, uh... lied about that. 698 00:30:50,183 --> 00:30:52,686 I wouldn't have agreed to it if I'd known. 699 00:30:53,353 --> 00:30:55,655 Oh, cool. Thanks. 700 00:30:56,389 --> 00:30:57,991 Baby, hang on. 701 00:30:58,910 --> 00:31:00,493 Herb, you can't go. 702 00:31:00,593 --> 00:31:02,195 Yeah, sue me. Whatever. 703 00:31:02,362 --> 00:31:04,431 No, as in, th-there isn't a boat for hours. 704 00:31:06,660 --> 00:31:08,601 What time is the boat? 705 00:31:09,736 --> 00:31:11,271 There's nothing you can say, Charles. 706 00:31:11,438 --> 00:31:13,373 Well, hang on a minute. Please-please don't go. 707 00:31:13,506 --> 00:31:15,108 You already said that. 708 00:31:15,241 --> 00:31:17,444 Please don't go. 709 00:31:18,778 --> 00:31:20,447 I mean, I can't read the guy's handwriting. 710 00:31:20,613 --> 00:31:22,682 He can't read his handwriting. 711 00:31:22,782 --> 00:31:25,118 Peter... absolute disgrace. 712 00:31:25,251 --> 00:31:28,855 Look at this timetable. Absolute car crash. 713 00:31:37,230 --> 00:31:39,599 Fold out... 714 00:31:39,733 --> 00:31:41,634 11:30, look. 715 00:31:41,768 --> 00:31:43,903 - Yes, 11:30. - That's a nine, isn't it? 716 00:31:44,370 --> 00:31:46,706 That's a five. But that's 11:30. 717 00:31:46,806 --> 00:31:49,409 He collects the post at 11:00, then have a cup of tea, 718 00:31:49,576 --> 00:31:51,144 use the WC, and then he sets sail. 719 00:31:51,311 --> 00:31:52,545 I mean, obviously, none of that's written here, 720 00:31:52,612 --> 00:31:55,749 but that is how he does it. 11:30. 721 00:31:59,486 --> 00:32:02,550 "Sometimes." He's written "sometimes." 722 00:32:02,155 --> 00:32:05,158 "Sometimes." He sometimes goes at 11:30. 723 00:32:14,801 --> 00:32:17,570 I got the rice! 724 00:32:19,305 --> 00:32:21,740 I ordered it in. 725 00:32:21,174 --> 00:32:23,677 Oh. Um... 726 00:32:23,810 --> 00:32:26,120 Yeah, I-I, I didn't ask you to do that. 727 00:32:26,146 --> 00:32:29,683 Oh, no, I know, but, uh, do you want it? 728 00:32:29,849 --> 00:32:31,918 I mean, not now, no. 729 00:32:32,180 --> 00:32:33,486 Oh. 730 00:32:33,653 --> 00:32:35,355 I, uh... 731 00:32:35,522 --> 00:32:38,958 I did order it in specially. 732 00:32:41,940 --> 00:32:43,296 - Okay, sure. I'll take it. - Great. 733 00:32:43,363 --> 00:32:46,866 Just, um... help yourself to whatever it... 734 00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:48,835 - cost to pay. - Right. 735 00:32:48,968 --> 00:32:50,870 Hey, Herb! 736 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:54,974 - Hiya! - Oh. Hi, Michael. 737 00:32:55,308 --> 00:32:57,644 - Okay, thank you. - Thanks. 738 00:33:00,547 --> 00:33:02,882 - Everything okay? - Yeah. 739 00:33:04,517 --> 00:33:06,186 You see-see anything? 740 00:33:06,353 --> 00:33:08,121 Uh... well. 741 00:33:08,288 --> 00:33:10,557 - Not really. Thanks for asking. - Yeah. 742 00:33:10,690 --> 00:33:11,991 Some gulls. 743 00:33:12,125 --> 00:33:13,893 Some wood pigeons. 744 00:33:15,295 --> 00:33:17,230 Listen, I'm sorry about last night. 745 00:33:17,397 --> 00:33:18,398 I was messing around. 746 00:33:18,531 --> 00:33:20,333 That's not why I'm... 747 00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:22,335 That's fine. Honestly, I-I don't care about that. 748 00:33:22,402 --> 00:33:25,839 Sure. I'm just... I'm just saying. 749 00:33:27,173 --> 00:33:29,750 Listen, um... 750 00:33:30,410 --> 00:33:32,545 Here's the thing. 751 00:33:32,679 --> 00:33:35,248 And it's a bit, uh... 752 00:33:35,415 --> 00:33:37,830 We need the money. 753 00:33:37,250 --> 00:33:38,752 Me and Nell. 754 00:33:40,687 --> 00:33:44,524 So if you're going, there's no gig. 755 00:33:45,392 --> 00:33:47,594 Nell's never gonna ask you herself. 756 00:33:47,727 --> 00:33:51,431 She's a bit proud, as you well know. 757 00:33:53,767 --> 00:33:55,769 So there it is. 758 00:33:57,404 --> 00:33:59,105 It would mean a lot. 759 00:34:02,375 --> 00:34:03,343 But you know. 760 00:34:03,510 --> 00:34:05,345 It's your call. 761 00:34:20,894 --> 00:34:22,962 Oh, yes. 762 00:34:23,960 --> 00:34:26,660 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 763 00:34:26,266 --> 00:34:27,300 Fantastic. 764 00:34:27,434 --> 00:34:28,735 I love it. 765 00:34:28,802 --> 00:34:31,638 I am the happiest man in the world. 766 00:34:31,805 --> 00:34:33,106 Gotta be. 767 00:34:33,273 --> 00:34:34,474 One of 'em. 768 00:34:34,641 --> 00:34:36,142 And if there's anything you need, 769 00:34:36,309 --> 00:34:38,440 just in terms of, you know, anything, really, 770 00:34:38,780 --> 00:34:39,913 flannels, a green room. 771 00:34:40,460 --> 00:34:41,481 - Or, uh... - Yeah. 772 00:34:41,648 --> 00:34:43,983 I mean, probably just somewhere to rehearse. 773 00:34:44,117 --> 00:34:45,752 - Yeah. Rehearsal space. - Yeah. 774 00:34:45,885 --> 00:34:47,287 Fantastic. 775 00:34:47,454 --> 00:34:49,756 Hose down the old classics. 776 00:34:50,490 --> 00:34:52,625 Happy man. 777 00:34:52,792 --> 00:34:54,661 Happy man, Herb. 778 00:34:54,794 --> 00:34:55,895 Follow me. 779 00:34:58,798 --> 00:35:00,600 Right. 780 00:35:00,734 --> 00:35:05,905 The conservatory/ rehearsal space. 781 00:35:06,720 --> 00:35:09,175 Foliage galore, don't worry about that side of things. 782 00:35:09,309 --> 00:35:10,844 Oh. Wow. 783 00:35:10,944 --> 00:35:12,479 - Yes, indeed. - Okay. 784 00:35:12,612 --> 00:35:14,514 I did try soundproofing it, 785 00:35:14,681 --> 00:35:17,517 but I'm not sure I've slathered myself in glory, I must say. 786 00:35:17,650 --> 00:35:19,519 It's, um... 787 00:35:19,652 --> 00:35:21,688 - it's pretty hot, isn't it? - Oh, God, yeah. 788 00:35:21,855 --> 00:35:23,356 No, it's unbearably hot. Yeah. 789 00:35:23,523 --> 00:35:25,358 And then, when the sun goes, it's too cold. 790 00:35:25,525 --> 00:35:28,595 So it's a, um, it's a country of contrasts. 791 00:35:28,695 --> 00:35:30,363 - Is this my guitar? - No. 792 00:35:30,530 --> 00:35:32,132 No, got that at auction. 793 00:35:32,265 --> 00:35:34,000 It's the one you recorded "Way Back When" on. 794 00:35:34,340 --> 00:35:35,935 - Yeah, that's what I mean. - Oh, wow, you are a fan. 795 00:35:35,935 --> 00:35:37,170 I am. Mm-hmm. 796 00:35:37,303 --> 00:35:39,539 In fact, Herb, if you do get a second, 797 00:35:39,706 --> 00:35:42,208 I wouldn't mind getting your paw print on that, please. 798 00:35:42,375 --> 00:35:44,344 Have, uh, have you got anything of mine? 799 00:35:44,511 --> 00:35:46,212 Sorry, what? 800 00:35:46,346 --> 00:35:48,715 Do you have anything of mine? 801 00:35:48,848 --> 00:35:50,216 Yeah. 802 00:35:50,383 --> 00:35:52,185 What is it? 803 00:35:52,352 --> 00:35:53,720 Is it creepy? 804 00:35:53,887 --> 00:35:55,455 It's hair, yeah. 805 00:35:55,555 --> 00:35:57,223 -Hair? -It's a, it's a lock of your hair. 806 00:35:57,357 --> 00:35:58,391 Yes, um... 807 00:35:58,558 --> 00:36:00,126 - Oh, my God. - Uh, yes. 808 00:36:01,561 --> 00:36:02,896 Whose hair are they selling you? 809 00:36:02,896 --> 00:36:04,130 Your hair. 810 00:36:04,230 --> 00:36:05,465 - Is it... No? Is it not yours? - No. 811 00:36:05,532 --> 00:36:06,733 - Uh-uh? - Nope. 812 00:36:06,900 --> 00:36:08,368 You've been scammed there, Charlie. 813 00:36:08,535 --> 00:36:09,636 I've never, never auctioned off any of my hair. 814 00:36:09,669 --> 00:36:10,870 Mis-sold hair? 815 00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:12,205 Yeah. I can, I can hack some off 816 00:36:12,238 --> 00:36:13,306 before I go, if you want. 817 00:36:13,406 --> 00:36:14,741 Oh, fantastic. Thank you. 818 00:36:14,908 --> 00:36:16,743 Um... 819 00:36:16,876 --> 00:36:18,411 Uh, no. 820 00:36:18,545 --> 00:36:19,746 - Joking. - No. Yeah. 821 00:36:19,879 --> 00:36:21,247 Um... 822 00:36:23,583 --> 00:36:26,860 Right, well, um... what'll it be, then? 823 00:36:26,252 --> 00:36:27,654 Shall I pull up a pew or is it 824 00:36:27,754 --> 00:36:29,255 - make myself scarce? - No, no, no. 825 00:36:29,422 --> 00:36:31,257 We're in scarce territory. Okay. 826 00:36:35,929 --> 00:36:37,430 Oh, for, um... 827 00:36:37,597 --> 00:36:38,932 Okay, it's not... 828 00:36:39,650 --> 00:36:40,166 Just give me a second. 829 00:36:45,505 --> 00:36:46,940 - Sounds weird. - Yeah. 830 00:36:47,173 --> 00:36:48,908 Okay, it's just the acoustics in here, okay? 831 00:36:54,681 --> 00:36:57,117 We don't... Let's... We don't need to do that one 832 00:36:57,250 --> 00:36:58,618 if you can't play it. 833 00:36:58,785 --> 00:37:00,620 I can... Of course I can play it. 834 00:37:00,754 --> 00:37:02,288 I've played it before. 835 00:37:02,455 --> 00:37:04,124 All right. 836 00:37:04,290 --> 00:37:05,892 - Chill. Jesus. - Yeah. 837 00:37:06,260 --> 00:37:08,895 Just... give me some space, okay? This isn't... 838 00:37:09,796 --> 00:37:11,865 Give me a second. 839 00:37:17,103 --> 00:37:19,706 Look, I'm sorry about being a prick last night. 840 00:37:19,806 --> 00:37:21,441 Okay? 841 00:37:21,574 --> 00:37:23,209 You can't help it. 842 00:37:23,309 --> 00:37:25,211 Thanks. 843 00:37:25,311 --> 00:37:27,113 Um... 844 00:37:27,247 --> 00:37:29,716 And... so you know, the solo album... 845 00:37:29,816 --> 00:37:31,151 Oh, God. You really don't have to. 846 00:37:31,251 --> 00:37:32,819 I didn't plan to, like, go it alone... 847 00:37:32,986 --> 00:37:34,387 No. We really don't have to talk about it, Herb. 848 00:37:34,454 --> 00:37:36,122 Well, well, okay, but you clearly... 849 00:37:36,256 --> 00:37:37,991 I clearly don't. I really, really clearly don't. 850 00:37:37,991 --> 00:37:40,126 It wasn't deliberate. Okay? It was, um... 851 00:37:40,293 --> 00:37:41,928 What, you made a solo album by accident? 852 00:37:42,950 --> 00:37:43,663 No. It was, the way it happened was... 853 00:37:43,830 --> 00:37:46,166 I didn't think about it. It just happened. 854 00:37:46,266 --> 00:37:47,934 It wasn't to do with 855 00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:50,503 - what was going on between... - Hey! 856 00:37:50,670 --> 00:37:52,172 - Hey. - Hey. 857 00:37:52,305 --> 00:37:54,808 - You all right? -Yeah. - Just not seeing anything. 858 00:37:54,974 --> 00:37:56,676 - Aw. Sorry, babe. - Oh, no. 859 00:37:56,810 --> 00:37:58,812 Yeah. The shopkeeper says there's this guy 860 00:37:58,812 --> 00:38:01,614 who does tours on the north side of the island. 861 00:38:01,681 --> 00:38:03,283 It's where the puffins nest. 862 00:38:03,350 --> 00:38:04,751 So, what, you're going on tour? 863 00:38:04,851 --> 00:38:06,686 I mean, it's your call, but, um... 864 00:38:06,853 --> 00:38:08,288 We can discuss later, if, uh... 865 00:38:08,455 --> 00:38:10,190 Sorry for interrupting, Herb. 866 00:38:10,357 --> 00:38:11,858 - Yeah. Yeah. - No, no, no, there's... 867 00:38:11,858 --> 00:38:14,194 there's loads that Herb can do without me. 868 00:38:14,327 --> 00:38:15,428 Right? 869 00:38:15,528 --> 00:38:16,596 Yeah. 870 00:38:16,696 --> 00:38:18,365 Okay. 871 00:38:21,868 --> 00:38:23,370 So when are you going? 872 00:38:38,551 --> 00:38:40,553 You're gonna miss Seaman's Day, Michael. 873 00:38:40,687 --> 00:38:42,956 - Big call. - I'll be back 874 00:38:43,123 --> 00:38:45,125 - in time for the gig, though. - Yeah. 875 00:38:45,225 --> 00:38:47,527 I hope you're not huffin' and puffin' for nothin'. 876 00:38:47,694 --> 00:38:48,895 By which I mean, 877 00:38:48,895 --> 00:38:50,630 I hope you see a puffin. 878 00:38:50,196 --> 00:38:51,865 I love this guy. 879 00:38:52,650 --> 00:38:53,333 Love you, baby. 880 00:38:57,637 --> 00:38:58,638 See you Tuesday! 881 00:38:58,705 --> 00:39:00,473 Tatty bye. 882 00:39:00,573 --> 00:39:02,308 - Ooh. House is this way, Nell. - I know. 883 00:39:02,409 --> 00:39:03,977 I just want one thing. 884 00:39:04,770 --> 00:39:05,645 Is it? Oh. 885 00:39:10,717 --> 00:39:12,652 Sorry, what were they called? 886 00:39:12,819 --> 00:39:15,989 Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. 887 00:39:16,890 --> 00:39:17,657 Oh, right. 888 00:39:17,824 --> 00:39:20,360 And they're a sort of cup. 889 00:39:20,493 --> 00:39:23,596 Uh, well, no, they're... they're a sort of, like, 890 00:39:23,730 --> 00:39:25,565 peanut butter in a kind of... 891 00:39:25,665 --> 00:39:27,434 - Parcel, is it? - Mm, no, not... 892 00:39:27,567 --> 00:39:29,200 Um, like a... 893 00:39:29,169 --> 00:39:30,437 I don't know. 894 00:39:30,570 --> 00:39:32,105 - Marcus. - Uh... 895 00:39:32,272 --> 00:39:33,440 Sorry about this. 896 00:39:33,573 --> 00:39:34,674 Oh. Hello. 897 00:39:34,774 --> 00:39:36,242 Can you see if 898 00:39:36,376 --> 00:39:38,678 the peanut butter's been delivered, please? 899 00:39:39,946 --> 00:39:41,681 - Oh, that's lovely. - Oh, yes. 900 00:39:41,848 --> 00:39:43,783 - Very nice stationery. - Thank you. 901 00:39:44,170 --> 00:39:47,120 Well, I noticed lots of people come here to write, so... 902 00:39:47,253 --> 00:39:48,455 Help the writers. 903 00:39:48,588 --> 00:39:50,357 Long live the scribes. 904 00:39:50,523 --> 00:39:53,526 Nell here is, of course, a writer extraordinaire. 905 00:39:53,593 --> 00:39:56,290 Was. And even then, not really. 906 00:39:56,129 --> 00:39:57,230 Yes, really. 907 00:39:57,364 --> 00:39:58,398 "Slip Away." One of yours. 908 00:39:58,465 --> 00:39:59,632 - Oh, yeah? - Oh, yeah. 909 00:39:59,766 --> 00:40:01,234 - You like that one, do you? - Mm... 910 00:40:01,368 --> 00:40:03,236 Yes, it's an absolute banger, thank you. 911 00:40:05,105 --> 00:40:06,639 Thank you. 912 00:40:06,773 --> 00:40:08,108 We have this. 913 00:40:08,241 --> 00:40:09,376 Mm. 914 00:40:09,476 --> 00:40:11,745 Um... 915 00:40:11,911 --> 00:40:14,381 You could maybe... 916 00:40:14,481 --> 00:40:16,820 put it in a cup? 917 00:40:16,216 --> 00:40:18,284 Yeah, I mean... 918 00:40:18,385 --> 00:40:21,540 Yeah, I mean... Yeah. 919 00:40:23,990 --> 00:40:25,392 - So what's the vibe? - Huh? 920 00:40:25,492 --> 00:40:28,610 With the, uh... with her. 921 00:40:28,161 --> 00:40:29,562 The shopkeeper. 922 00:40:29,729 --> 00:40:30,663 Oh. 923 00:40:30,830 --> 00:40:32,665 Uh, uh, Amanda. 924 00:40:32,832 --> 00:40:35,680 She's, um... 925 00:40:35,235 --> 00:40:38,304 She lives with, uh, the lad and, um... 926 00:40:38,438 --> 00:40:40,407 mother, I think, somewhere. 927 00:40:41,241 --> 00:40:43,743 You quite like her, though. 928 00:40:44,577 --> 00:40:46,279 So get her number. 929 00:40:46,413 --> 00:40:48,248 I don't think we're quite there, numbers-wise. 930 00:40:48,415 --> 00:40:49,749 What do you mean? 931 00:40:49,916 --> 00:40:51,685 There. We're not there, numbers-wise. 932 00:40:54,187 --> 00:40:56,189 Also, I'd have to march up 933 00:40:56,322 --> 00:40:59,259 right outside her shop and use her phone box. 934 00:40:59,592 --> 00:41:02,280 - Not a great look, is it? - That's true. 935 00:41:02,162 --> 00:41:04,264 Ooh, invite her to the gig. 936 00:41:04,364 --> 00:41:06,433 - No. Not happening. - Why? Why not? 937 00:41:06,533 --> 00:41:08,334 Because no. 938 00:41:08,435 --> 00:41:10,704 I... That's my worst thing about gigs, is other people. 939 00:41:10,870 --> 00:41:12,672 Pushing, singing along... 940 00:41:12,839 --> 00:41:15,175 - She's one person, Charlie. - I know she's one person. 941 00:41:15,275 --> 00:41:17,811 She's not going to start a mosh pit, is she? 942 00:41:23,983 --> 00:41:25,719 What's a mosh pit? 943 00:41:55,415 --> 00:41:57,183 Ah. 944 00:41:57,350 --> 00:41:59,819 Genius at work. 945 00:41:59,986 --> 00:42:01,855 Did someone order a... 946 00:42:01,988 --> 00:42:03,823 Nell Mortimer solo album? 947 00:42:03,990 --> 00:42:05,658 I don't think they did. 948 00:42:05,825 --> 00:42:09,829 I would be at the front of the queue in HMV, believe me. 949 00:42:09,929 --> 00:42:11,865 Get the old elbows out. 950 00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:15,535 Oh. Herbivore. 951 00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:19,105 Why are you so cheerful? 952 00:42:19,272 --> 00:42:21,700 Have a look at that. 953 00:42:24,744 --> 00:42:27,347 - Oh, wow. - Yep. 954 00:42:27,614 --> 00:42:29,683 - There's a lot to that. - Wow. Oh, my good... 955 00:42:29,716 --> 00:42:31,284 Oh! 956 00:42:31,384 --> 00:42:32,385 Oh... 957 00:42:32,519 --> 00:42:34,540 We look about 12. 958 00:42:34,187 --> 00:42:35,455 I mean, look at that hair. 959 00:42:35,455 --> 00:42:37,190 - Yeah, it's not great. - Awful. 960 00:42:37,357 --> 00:42:39,359 -Not good hair. -Don't know what I was thinking. 961 00:42:39,426 --> 00:42:41,561 - Okay. Remember that day? - Ooh, I like these. 962 00:42:41,695 --> 00:42:43,430 -Yeah. -HERB: I just remember being cold. 963 00:42:43,563 --> 00:42:45,598 - It's a swimming pool. - And annoyed all day. 964 00:42:45,598 --> 00:42:47,400 Yeah, that rings a bell. 965 00:42:48,868 --> 00:42:50,403 Oh, my goodness. 966 00:42:50,537 --> 00:42:52,205 Huh? 967 00:42:52,305 --> 00:42:54,740 Tickets from our Roundhouse gig in '09. 968 00:42:54,207 --> 00:42:56,409 Oh, yes, please. We were there. 969 00:42:56,576 --> 00:42:58,780 Well, yeah, you've got tickets. 970 00:42:58,211 --> 00:42:59,813 Yes, I know. That's how we got 'em. 971 00:42:59,946 --> 00:43:01,810 Fantastic. That gig. 972 00:43:01,214 --> 00:43:04,718 Had the world at our feet, Charles. 973 00:43:06,319 --> 00:43:08,880 Now, if no one objects, 974 00:43:08,254 --> 00:43:10,623 I thought I might make a curry. 975 00:43:10,790 --> 00:43:15,295 A good old Dr. Currold Shipman, at your servissimo. 976 00:43:15,428 --> 00:43:17,564 With, of course, the Condoleezza Rice. 977 00:43:17,731 --> 00:43:19,933 Okay. 978 00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:25,405 What? 979 00:43:25,505 --> 00:43:27,607 I think we might be back to square one, Herb. 980 00:43:27,774 --> 00:43:29,175 Well, get it out. 981 00:43:29,309 --> 00:43:30,810 - Get it out. - Oh, right. Okay. 982 00:43:32,445 --> 00:43:33,913 Quickly. 983 00:43:34,140 --> 00:43:36,583 You're boiling my phone. 984 00:43:36,950 --> 00:43:38,918 - Okay, Morning Haze... - No. 985 00:43:39,850 --> 00:43:40,487 ...as an album... Listen. Please listen. 986 00:43:40,487 --> 00:43:41,788 So what I'm saying is that 987 00:43:41,921 --> 00:43:43,423 that was the first time you could see 988 00:43:43,590 --> 00:43:44,824 - where we were going. - No. No, I don't think... 989 00:43:44,924 --> 00:43:45,992 Like, the first... like, we stopped 990 00:43:46,260 --> 00:43:47,694 trying to do, like, rock or... 991 00:43:47,827 --> 00:43:49,529 - Rock? Did you just say rock? - Yeah. Yeah, rock. 992 00:43:49,529 --> 00:43:51,264 When were we ever trying to do rock? 993 00:43:51,431 --> 00:43:53,199 - What are you talking about? - You, you I remember... 994 00:43:53,266 --> 00:43:55,602 You told Rich Hamner that you wanted "Give Your Love" 995 00:43:55,769 --> 00:43:57,270 to sound like The Libertines. 996 00:43:57,370 --> 00:43:58,505 I... Come on. 997 00:43:58,705 --> 00:43:59,706 - Is that true? - Yeah. 998 00:43:59,873 --> 00:44:01,474 - Okay. - Hun... Hundred percent. 999 00:44:01,608 --> 00:44:03,343 It was cool. It wasn't what we were doing. 1000 00:44:03,343 --> 00:44:05,145 It had nothing to do with the music we were making. 1001 00:44:05,211 --> 00:44:06,713 I got to say, this is brilliant. I'm loving this. 1002 00:44:06,780 --> 00:44:09,150 I am absolutely loving this. 1003 00:44:09,115 --> 00:44:12,318 Just McGwyer Mortimer just exchanging anecdotes. 1004 00:44:12,452 --> 00:44:13,887 Why not? I feel like David Letterman. 1005 00:44:13,987 --> 00:44:16,322 I really do. With a chicken xacuti. 1006 00:44:17,724 --> 00:44:18,792 Herb? 1007 00:44:18,958 --> 00:44:21,127 Ah... Herb? 1008 00:44:21,961 --> 00:44:23,963 Herb. 1009 00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:25,532 He's an enigma. 1010 00:44:25,665 --> 00:44:27,233 He's gone to get his guitar. 1011 00:44:27,367 --> 00:44:28,735 - Oh, has he? Has he? - Hmm. Hmm. 1012 00:44:28,868 --> 00:44:30,303 Ah. 1013 00:44:30,470 --> 00:44:33,239 Oh, the wanderer returns. 1014 00:44:33,373 --> 00:44:34,808 Herb. 1015 00:44:35,809 --> 00:44:37,344 - Oh. - You all right? 1016 00:44:37,477 --> 00:44:38,812 - Yeah. - Yeah? 1017 00:44:38,978 --> 00:44:40,313 Gonna prove a point now? 1018 00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:42,480 - You ready to rock? - Mm. Oh, wow. Okay. 1019 00:45:42,575 --> 00:45:43,743 Charles? 1020 00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:10,737 It's not rock. 1021 00:46:10,837 --> 00:46:12,305 No. 1022 00:46:12,472 --> 00:46:14,641 Not when you play it like that. 1023 00:46:15,975 --> 00:46:18,478 Wowsers. I mean, wowsers in your trousers. That's... 1024 00:46:18,645 --> 00:46:20,914 I mean, oh, my goodness gracious me. 1025 00:46:21,810 --> 00:46:22,615 That's something else. That's, um... 1026 00:46:22,749 --> 00:46:24,417 That's something... 1027 00:46:24,517 --> 00:46:26,286 Everything's there, and that's somewhere else. 1028 00:46:26,286 --> 00:46:27,687 Just believe me. That's... I'm speechless. 1029 00:46:27,754 --> 00:46:29,422 - Well, you're not. - Well, I am. 1030 00:46:29,522 --> 00:46:31,424 I mean, I've never, you know... That's... Yeah. 1031 00:46:31,624 --> 00:46:34,127 And I've seen a thing or two, believe me. 1032 00:46:34,294 --> 00:46:36,429 Keep your Niagara Falls. Keep your Hadrian's Wall. 1033 00:46:36,596 --> 00:46:38,164 Keep the lot. Keep Alton Towers. 1034 00:46:38,264 --> 00:46:39,866 That's beautiful. That's what it's about. 1035 00:46:39,866 --> 00:46:41,340 You two. 1036 00:46:41,167 --> 00:46:45,438 The bees' bollocks, basically. 1037 00:46:45,605 --> 00:46:47,640 Fantastic. 1038 00:46:49,809 --> 00:46:51,644 Probably gonna go to bed. 1039 00:46:51,778 --> 00:46:52,812 - Turn in? - Yeah. 1040 00:46:52,946 --> 00:46:54,547 Absolutely. Hundred percent. 1041 00:46:54,681 --> 00:46:56,282 - Leave 'em wanting more. - Yep. 1042 00:46:56,449 --> 00:46:58,618 - Night. Mm-hmm. - Salute. Yes, big day tomorrow. 1043 00:46:58,685 --> 00:46:59,786 Seaman's Day. 1044 00:46:59,953 --> 00:47:01,855 - Lest we forget. - Yeah. 1045 00:47:01,955 --> 00:47:03,790 Come on. 1046 00:47:03,957 --> 00:47:06,226 And everything. 1047 00:47:08,194 --> 00:47:10,230 Wonderful, that. 1048 00:47:45,650 --> 00:47:46,232 Hey. 1049 00:47:48,268 --> 00:47:49,769 - Here you go. - Thanks. 1050 00:47:52,505 --> 00:47:55,575 Um... set list-wise, 1051 00:47:55,709 --> 00:47:58,545 I think we shouldn't do "Our Love." Really. 1052 00:47:58,678 --> 00:48:01,448 - All right. - It just feels kind of, um, 1053 00:48:01,614 --> 00:48:03,516 - Okay. - Like it wouldn't work live, 1054 00:48:03,683 --> 00:48:05,352 I think. 1055 00:48:05,518 --> 00:48:07,530 Maybe do "Inside a Whale" or something. 1056 00:48:07,187 --> 00:48:08,188 Mm-hmm. 1057 00:48:08,288 --> 00:48:09,856 Um, you... 1058 00:48:09,956 --> 00:48:12,250 - You're not online, are you? - Yeah, sort of. 1059 00:48:12,192 --> 00:48:14,561 It's not great 4G, but yeah. Why? 1060 00:48:14,694 --> 00:48:16,863 Um, can I borrow your phone, just quickly? 1061 00:48:16,963 --> 00:48:18,598 Yeah. 1062 00:48:18,732 --> 00:48:20,533 - Is this the album cover? - It's only a mock-up. 1063 00:48:20,533 --> 00:48:21,935 - It's not, you know... - Right. 1064 00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:23,603 Feat? 1065 00:48:25,205 --> 00:48:27,374 Yeah, like, um... like "featuring." 1066 00:48:27,574 --> 00:48:29,442 - Ah. - You know? 1067 00:48:29,576 --> 00:48:30,710 Yeah. 1068 00:48:30,877 --> 00:48:33,246 What-what do you think? 1069 00:48:33,413 --> 00:48:35,415 I mean... 1070 00:48:35,615 --> 00:48:37,717 I make chutney now, so, you know, 1071 00:48:37,784 --> 00:48:40,253 - who cares what I think? - Well, I do. 1072 00:48:40,387 --> 00:48:42,389 Come on, please. 1073 00:48:44,157 --> 00:48:45,558 Do you want me to say that I like it 1074 00:48:45,625 --> 00:48:47,394 or do you want me to be honest? 1075 00:48:49,229 --> 00:48:51,640 Okay. 1076 00:48:51,231 --> 00:48:53,633 Wait. 1077 00:48:54,334 --> 00:48:56,903 Have they whitened your teeth? 1078 00:48:57,971 --> 00:49:00,730 - Yeah. See? - Oh, my God. 1079 00:49:00,173 --> 00:49:01,241 Wow. 1080 00:49:01,408 --> 00:49:02,776 Wait. 1081 00:49:02,909 --> 00:49:04,477 Let me see what they look like in real life. 1082 00:49:04,511 --> 00:49:05,912 - No, no, it's not me. - Knock, knock. 1083 00:49:05,912 --> 00:49:06,913 - Knock, knock. - Oh. 1084 00:49:07,130 --> 00:49:08,748 Sorry to interrupt. 1085 00:49:08,915 --> 00:49:11,918 Um, just to say, Nell, we are an hour away 1086 00:49:11,985 --> 00:49:13,953 - from low tide. - Oh. 1087 00:49:14,870 --> 00:49:16,322 - And, um, Herb... - Mm? 1088 00:49:17,524 --> 00:49:19,250 I found another one. 1089 00:49:19,192 --> 00:49:21,261 Ah. 1090 00:49:21,361 --> 00:49:23,960 All right. 1091 00:49:30,603 --> 00:49:32,500 15-love. 1092 00:49:32,105 --> 00:49:34,441 No, just the sheer connection 1093 00:49:34,607 --> 00:49:36,443 between the two of you. 1094 00:49:36,609 --> 00:49:37,944 It's incredible, Herb. 1095 00:49:42,215 --> 00:49:44,684 30-love. 1096 00:49:45,485 --> 00:49:47,787 You can't fake that, Herb. 1097 00:49:47,954 --> 00:49:49,956 You cannot fake it. 1098 00:49:52,792 --> 00:49:54,794 40-love. 1099 00:49:54,894 --> 00:49:56,196 Ridiculous. 1100 00:49:56,363 --> 00:49:58,865 And I'm not just talking musically, Herb. 1101 00:49:59,320 --> 00:50:01,968 I'm talking chemist... 1102 00:50:02,135 --> 00:50:03,703 "chemistrarily." 1103 00:50:03,870 --> 00:50:06,172 The two of you, you're just so good together. 1104 00:50:06,306 --> 00:50:08,141 Just two people in perfect harmony. 1105 00:50:08,241 --> 00:50:09,843 Literally. 1106 00:50:09,976 --> 00:50:12,312 And I know, of course, you are now 1107 00:50:12,479 --> 00:50:14,314 the great Herb McGwyer, the solo artist, 1108 00:50:14,481 --> 00:50:16,316 and I'm all for that, fair play to you, 1109 00:50:16,483 --> 00:50:19,886 but I must say, just from a neutral's perspective, 1110 00:50:20,530 --> 00:50:22,689 just seeing the two of you, you just think, 1111 00:50:22,856 --> 00:50:25,191 "Why are they not still together?" 1112 00:50:27,270 --> 00:50:29,162 - Oh, I wasn't ready. - And that's one-nil. 1113 00:50:30,630 --> 00:50:31,564 And that's game, Charles. 1114 00:50:31,664 --> 00:50:33,767 We change ends. We go again. 1115 00:50:33,933 --> 00:50:35,402 - Fantastic, that. - Hell of a serve 1116 00:50:35,535 --> 00:50:37,337 - you got on you. - Oh! Well, 1117 00:50:37,504 --> 00:50:39,239 I've no one to play with. 1118 00:50:39,406 --> 00:50:41,274 So, basically, the only thing I can practice 1119 00:50:41,441 --> 00:50:43,877 is the old serve. 1120 00:50:44,100 --> 00:50:46,179 The dreaded serve. 1121 00:50:46,346 --> 00:50:48,515 Whoa! It's a bit of a weapon. 1122 00:50:48,682 --> 00:50:49,949 Yeah, you're a bit of a weapon. 1123 00:50:50,830 --> 00:50:52,180 - Pardon me? - Okay. 1124 00:50:52,185 --> 00:50:53,953 - Huh? - You ready? 1125 00:50:54,870 --> 00:50:56,560 Uh, yeah, I'm ready. 1126 00:50:56,189 --> 00:50:57,757 Born ready. 1127 00:51:01,270 --> 00:51:02,629 Aah! 1128 00:51:02,762 --> 00:51:04,564 You see, this is the issue. 1129 00:51:05,865 --> 00:51:07,934 I've not returned a serve for six years. 1130 00:51:10,904 --> 00:51:12,405 - New balls, please. - Right you are. 1131 00:51:12,439 --> 00:51:14,607 And also, of course, lest we forget, 1132 00:51:14,774 --> 00:51:16,576 a very happy Seaman's Day to you. 1133 00:51:16,710 --> 00:51:18,745 - Happy Seaman's Day to you. - Thank you. 1134 00:51:18,912 --> 00:51:20,814 - I thought you were leaving. - No. 1135 00:51:20,914 --> 00:51:23,983 Oh, yeah, I was, but, I mean, I didn't. 1136 00:51:24,651 --> 00:51:26,520 Where do you play? 1137 00:51:26,219 --> 00:51:27,554 - Pardon me? - Tennis. 1138 00:51:27,654 --> 00:51:29,550 Oh, just, no. Just at home. 1139 00:51:29,222 --> 00:51:30,590 Just rubbish. 1140 00:51:30,724 --> 00:51:32,225 He's got a court. 1141 00:51:32,392 --> 00:51:33,960 Really? 1142 00:51:34,940 --> 00:51:35,729 Yeah, did you not... 1143 00:51:35,895 --> 00:51:38,231 You two should play sometime. 1144 00:51:38,398 --> 00:51:40,660 Oh, I, uh... 1145 00:51:41,901 --> 00:51:44,404 Do I have to come dressed like this? 1146 00:51:44,504 --> 00:51:47,107 Exactly. 1147 00:51:47,240 --> 00:51:49,776 The 1970s called. They want Björn Borg back. 1148 00:51:49,909 --> 00:51:51,444 I don't know why you're laughing, mate. 1149 00:51:51,578 --> 00:51:52,445 - They're your clothes. - They are my clothes. 1150 00:51:52,579 --> 00:51:54,514 Yeah, they are. 1151 00:51:56,316 --> 00:51:59,850 - Uh, do you have Calippos? - Oh, no. 1152 00:51:59,185 --> 00:52:01,855 - Sorry, what was that? - I did say 1153 00:52:01,955 --> 00:52:03,423 - it was a long shot. - Um, Calippos. 1154 00:52:03,590 --> 00:52:05,825 They're like, uh, round lollies. 1155 00:52:05,959 --> 00:52:07,527 Well, they're not round. They're cylindrical. 1156 00:52:07,594 --> 00:52:08,995 They're sort of yea... 1157 00:52:09,129 --> 00:52:11,431 they're yea wide and yea sort of long. 1158 00:52:11,598 --> 00:52:13,666 I've got choc ices. 1159 00:52:13,800 --> 00:52:15,769 - Perfect, yeah. - Different. Okay. 1160 00:52:15,869 --> 00:52:18,605 - Right this way. - Ah, of course. 1161 00:52:18,705 --> 00:52:20,373 The old, uh, chest freezer. 1162 00:52:20,473 --> 00:52:22,442 - There they are. - There they are. Oh. 1163 00:52:25,945 --> 00:52:27,614 Um, on a slightly different note, Amanda, 1164 00:52:27,714 --> 00:52:28,782 - do you like music? - Sorry? 1165 00:52:28,815 --> 00:52:29,949 Do you like... Sorry. 1166 00:52:30,116 --> 00:52:31,384 Do you like music? Sort of singing 1167 00:52:31,518 --> 00:52:33,119 - and dancing? - Well, not dancing. 1168 00:52:33,286 --> 00:52:34,654 No, no, but sort of singing 1169 00:52:34,788 --> 00:52:36,790 and playing music. Like, music. 1170 00:52:36,956 --> 00:52:39,526 Uh, suppose it-it depends what it is, really. 1171 00:52:39,626 --> 00:52:41,528 - Well, yeah, obviously. - Well, of course it does. 1172 00:52:41,561 --> 00:52:43,530 Well, specifically, McGwyer Mortimer. 1173 00:52:44,631 --> 00:52:46,299 Oh, I... uh... I-I... 1174 00:52:46,466 --> 00:52:48,635 - As in Herb McGwyer? - No, I... 1175 00:52:48,802 --> 00:52:50,670 - Who is that? - Who's that? 1176 00:52:50,804 --> 00:52:54,808 Only the best-selling UK folk rock artist of 2014. 1177 00:52:54,908 --> 00:52:56,476 And also the man stood right before us. 1178 00:52:56,643 --> 00:52:58,478 There he is... the man, the myth. 1179 00:52:58,645 --> 00:52:59,813 - Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry. - It's fine. 1180 00:52:59,846 --> 00:53:01,648 What did you say your name was? 1181 00:53:01,715 --> 00:53:03,149 - Doesn't matter. Doesn't... - Herb McGwyer. 1182 00:53:03,149 --> 00:53:04,250 - I think, uh... - "Raspberry Fair"? 1183 00:53:04,317 --> 00:53:05,685 No? 1184 00:53:05,819 --> 00:53:07,921 - Uh... - "Inside a Whale"? No? 1185 00:53:08,540 --> 00:53:09,556 - "Our Love"? - Well, don't just name 1186 00:53:09,689 --> 00:53:10,890 the old stuff. There's... 1187 00:53:11,240 --> 00:53:12,726 Uh, "Work the Body" is more recent, 1188 00:53:12,826 --> 00:53:14,940 featuring, uh, Little Peas. 1189 00:53:14,194 --> 00:53:16,996 Or "Step on It" featuring Baby Gal. 1190 00:53:25,905 --> 00:53:28,174 Oh, I mainly listen to ABBA. 1191 00:53:32,120 --> 00:53:33,513 "What are you doing on Tuesday night?" 1192 00:53:33,513 --> 00:53:34,848 That's what you should have said. 1193 00:53:34,881 --> 00:53:36,916 - Come on. - Not, "Do you like music?" 1194 00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:40,520 Dearie me. We can't all be lotharios, thank you very much. 1195 00:53:40,687 --> 00:53:42,856 - What? - We can't all be lotharios. 1196 00:53:43,230 --> 00:53:44,557 - I'm not a lothario, mate. - I'm not saying 1197 00:53:44,591 --> 00:53:46,260 - you are a lothario. - Sounds like you are. 1198 00:53:46,260 --> 00:53:47,427 I'm saying I'm not a lothario. 1199 00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:49,396 - Yeah, evidently. - It's been a long while. 1200 00:53:49,529 --> 00:53:51,698 - Five years, if you're asking. - Uh-huh. 1201 00:53:51,798 --> 00:53:53,660 Well, she likes tennis, clearly. 1202 00:53:53,133 --> 00:53:55,402 - Mm-hmm. - Ask her round to play. 1203 00:53:55,535 --> 00:53:58,371 Ask her round to play? You're joking. 1204 00:53:58,538 --> 00:54:00,573 I'm not nine. 1205 00:54:00,707 --> 00:54:02,208 Well, I'm not, am I? 1206 00:54:02,375 --> 00:54:03,877 "Ask her round to play." 1207 00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:06,813 My goodness. Very sexy, I don't think. 1208 00:54:23,563 --> 00:54:24,931 - What you doing? - Oh. 1209 00:54:25,650 --> 00:54:27,767 No, uh, nothing. Just, um... 1210 00:54:27,934 --> 00:54:32,739 It's just, uh, an invitation to the gig for Amanda. 1211 00:54:32,906 --> 00:54:34,641 Pop it round. Yeah. 1212 00:54:34,808 --> 00:54:35,909 Okay. Good. 1213 00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:37,310 Okay. Come on, then. 1214 00:54:38,278 --> 00:54:39,746 - What's the plan? - Ah, yes. 1215 00:54:39,913 --> 00:54:44,184 It is a simple case of jacket potato, baked beans, 1216 00:54:44,317 --> 00:54:46,186 flip open the lids on a couple of home brews 1217 00:54:46,319 --> 00:54:49,656 and lay waste to some Red Leicester. 1218 00:54:50,790 --> 00:54:53,960 Okay, but I mean for Seaman's Day. 1219 00:54:54,294 --> 00:54:55,929 As in... I-I mean, what do you mean? 1220 00:54:56,290 --> 00:54:57,263 Are we not... 1221 00:54:57,364 --> 00:54:59,366 You've mentioned it several times. 1222 00:54:59,466 --> 00:55:01,334 Seaman's Day? 1223 00:55:01,434 --> 00:55:02,769 I mean, it's just... it's-it's Seaman's Day. 1224 00:55:02,769 --> 00:55:04,371 I mean, it's not, you know... 1225 00:55:04,504 --> 00:55:06,272 But what... So, like, is there any activity, 1226 00:55:06,373 --> 00:55:07,874 like, pinned to it? 1227 00:55:08,775 --> 00:55:10,143 Pinned? 1228 00:55:10,276 --> 00:55:12,512 Well, is there anything to do on... 1229 00:55:12,645 --> 00:55:14,614 because it's Seaman's Day or, uh... 1230 00:55:14,814 --> 00:55:17,183 Well, I mean, easiest way to explain is it's Seaman's Day. 1231 00:55:17,317 --> 00:55:19,352 - Right. - So it's just, you know, 1232 00:55:19,486 --> 00:55:21,540 Seaman's Day... it's-it's just the day of Seaman's Day. 1233 00:55:21,121 --> 00:55:23,523 I mean, no one really does anything for it. 1234 00:55:23,690 --> 00:55:25,125 Oh. 1235 00:55:25,225 --> 00:55:26,793 - Okay. - Okay. 1236 00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:28,628 Well... 1237 00:55:28,795 --> 00:55:29,996 Well, we are. 1238 00:55:30,130 --> 00:55:32,132 Can we? 1239 00:55:33,833 --> 00:55:35,335 This stuff here 1240 00:55:35,335 --> 00:55:37,137 is gauze, and this stuff here... Be careful. 1241 00:55:37,237 --> 00:55:38,972 He means... He's trying to say "gorse," I think. 1242 00:55:39,500 --> 00:55:40,640 He-he's not trying to say "gorse." 1243 00:55:40,640 --> 00:55:42,375 - All right. - Let's go, Nell. 1244 00:55:42,509 --> 00:55:44,144 - Go on. - Oh! Missed it. 1245 00:55:44,244 --> 00:55:45,478 I can do better. 1246 00:55:45,545 --> 00:55:46,846 What a terrible delivery. 1247 00:55:46,880 --> 00:55:48,648 - I can and I will. - Whoo! 1248 00:55:48,815 --> 00:55:51,985 Now, then. Now, then, watch! 1249 00:55:52,850 --> 00:55:53,520 Come on! 1250 00:55:53,687 --> 00:55:55,989 - That's a home run. - Wrong sport, mate. 1251 00:55:59,325 --> 00:56:01,227 - I'm having that tomato. I am. - No! 1252 00:56:01,361 --> 00:56:03,960 -No, Herb. Get off. No. -No, I'm having it. I'm having it. 1253 00:56:03,163 --> 00:56:04,264 - Your dirty little paws... - You're gonna squash it. 1254 00:56:04,264 --> 00:56:05,732 - Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi! - Yes! 1255 00:56:05,865 --> 00:56:07,167 Children, children. 1256 00:56:07,167 --> 00:56:09,669 - McGwyer Mortimer. - Mmm. 1257 00:56:09,836 --> 00:56:12,339 - Mm, yeah. - We're in, yeah. 1258 00:56:12,439 --> 00:56:14,507 And plop. 1259 00:56:16,276 --> 00:56:17,744 There she goes. 1260 00:56:17,911 --> 00:56:19,913 To paraphrase The Beatles, there goes the sun. 1261 00:56:20,914 --> 00:56:22,615 - Fan of The Beatles, Herb? - Can we just... 1262 00:56:22,682 --> 00:56:24,551 - Oh, I bet you are. - ...watch the sunset in si...? 1263 00:56:24,551 --> 00:56:26,553 - I bet you bloody are. - Yes, I like The Beatles. 1264 00:56:26,720 --> 00:56:28,888 Let's watch the sunset, okay? 1265 00:56:31,424 --> 00:56:33,560 We were lucky enough once to, um, see 1266 00:56:33,727 --> 00:56:35,528 the, uh, Bootleg Beatles. 1267 00:56:35,695 --> 00:56:37,364 Brilliant. 1268 00:56:37,464 --> 00:56:39,199 Have you seen them, Herb? 1269 00:56:39,265 --> 00:56:40,867 Something else. Tight as a drum. 1270 00:56:40,967 --> 00:56:42,736 - Okay, just... - Hit after hit. 1271 00:56:42,736 --> 00:56:44,537 Can we just please... Can we just watch the sunset? 1272 00:56:44,537 --> 00:56:46,573 Can we just please appreciate this damn sunset? 1273 00:56:50,744 --> 00:56:52,645 - Shall we, um... - Okay, yeah. 1274 00:56:52,746 --> 00:56:54,214 - Let's pack up and head back. - No, wait, wait, wait, w-wait. 1275 00:56:54,247 --> 00:56:55,882 - I've got a thing. - Oh. 1276 00:56:56,490 --> 00:56:57,217 Just sit down. 1277 00:56:57,384 --> 00:56:59,520 Rest the legs. 1278 00:56:59,219 --> 00:57:00,887 So, I brought these 1279 00:57:00,987 --> 00:57:02,889 to do with Michael, but he's off perving 1280 00:57:02,989 --> 00:57:04,724 over puffins or whatever. 1281 00:57:04,724 --> 00:57:06,493 - There you go. - Thank you. 1282 00:57:06,626 --> 00:57:08,610 For you. And pens. 1283 00:57:08,161 --> 00:57:10,630 - There you go. - To write on the lanterns. 1284 00:57:10,230 --> 00:57:11,798 To write on the lanterns. 1285 00:57:11,931 --> 00:57:13,433 Um, what do we... what do we write? 1286 00:57:13,600 --> 00:57:15,135 We're writing, um... 1287 00:57:15,268 --> 00:57:17,804 - Just... - ...wishes. 1288 00:57:17,904 --> 00:57:20,173 People, names, thoughts, prayers. 1289 00:57:20,306 --> 00:57:21,775 - I mean, mainly wishes. - Okay. 1290 00:57:21,808 --> 00:57:23,176 - Primarily wishes. - Primarily wishes. 1291 00:57:23,243 --> 00:57:24,277 And privately. 1292 00:57:24,411 --> 00:57:25,745 Okay. 1293 00:57:25,912 --> 00:57:27,447 I've got all my wishes right here. 1294 00:57:27,614 --> 00:57:30,183 Sat on a pebbled beach with McGwyer Mortimer. 1295 00:57:30,316 --> 00:57:31,785 No further questions, genie. 1296 00:57:31,918 --> 00:57:33,853 Eff off. 1297 00:57:40,260 --> 00:57:42,950 - What? - Have you got writer's block? 1298 00:57:42,262 --> 00:57:44,664 -Yeah. -Do you want me to write the last ten percent for you? 1299 00:57:44,831 --> 00:57:46,132 - Is that... - No, I'm doing it. 1300 00:57:46,266 --> 00:57:47,801 - Can I help you? - I-I'm doing... 1301 00:57:47,934 --> 00:57:49,969 - Thank you. I'm doing it. - Very funny. -Yeah. 1302 00:57:52,806 --> 00:57:55,475 -I think I know whose name you're writing. -Huh? 1303 00:57:57,430 --> 00:57:58,945 Amanda? 1304 00:58:04,784 --> 00:58:06,286 Three, two, one. 1305 00:58:06,386 --> 00:58:08,121 Think we know where it's gonna go, though. 1306 00:58:09,550 --> 00:58:10,957 - Three, two, one. - Two, one. 1307 00:58:11,240 --> 00:58:13,393 - Alley-oop. - HERB and NELL: Go! 1308 00:58:15,628 --> 00:58:17,530 - Go on! - Whoo! 1309 00:58:17,664 --> 00:58:20,333 - Whoo! - Yes, please, Louise! 1310 00:58:38,685 --> 00:58:40,253 Look at my one go. 1311 00:58:40,353 --> 00:58:42,155 Well, look at my one go, by that rationale. 1312 00:58:43,656 --> 00:58:45,925 Oh, dearie me. 1313 00:58:50,630 --> 00:58:51,498 Oh, my goodness. 1314 00:58:51,564 --> 00:58:52,999 - Hold, hold. - Can we just speed up? 1315 00:58:53,330 --> 00:58:54,567 - This is... - We can't speed up. 1316 00:58:54,734 --> 00:58:56,200 - We speed down if anything. - I'm running. 1317 00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:57,203 - What are you doing? - No, no, no. -No. 1318 00:58:57,203 --> 00:58:58,905 - Herb! - Herb, man! 1319 00:58:59,720 --> 00:59:00,840 - You're reckless. - He doesn't have any... 1320 00:59:01,700 --> 00:59:02,375 - Oh! - Right, we made it. 1321 00:59:02,375 --> 00:59:03,943 - Right, come on. - Oh, my goodness. 1322 00:59:03,943 --> 00:59:05,612 - Okay, we're in. - Right. 1323 00:59:05,745 --> 00:59:07,447 - In, in, in, in, in. - Access all areas. 1324 00:59:07,447 --> 00:59:09,490 - Fantastic. - Whoops. Sorry. 1325 00:59:09,215 --> 00:59:10,684 - Oh, my gosh. - Okay, it's all right. 1326 00:59:10,717 --> 00:59:12,285 - I'm fine. - Oh. We're in. Lovely. 1327 00:59:12,385 --> 00:59:13,687 Uh, right. 1328 00:59:13,787 --> 00:59:15,121 - To bed for I, I think. - Okay. Yeah. 1329 00:59:15,188 --> 00:59:16,756 - Oh, my gosh. - Uh, pint of water. 1330 00:59:16,890 --> 00:59:18,525 Yeah. 1331 00:59:18,625 --> 00:59:20,393 Quick widdle, and then, uh... 1332 00:59:20,393 --> 00:59:24,864 ...climb the wooden hill to, uh, dear old Bedfordshire. 1333 00:59:25,310 --> 00:59:27,267 - So, what now? - Oh, what a Seaman's Day! 1334 00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:29,135 - You tired? - We did it! 1335 00:59:29,269 --> 00:59:30,637 No. 1336 00:59:30,770 --> 00:59:32,906 - Are you counting? - I was trying to. 1337 00:59:33,390 --> 00:59:36,209 Hang on. But there are 64... I can't do that. I give up. 1338 00:59:36,376 --> 00:59:38,378 - That's a lot of omelets. - It's too many eggs. 1339 00:59:38,545 --> 00:59:40,246 It's not one chicken 1340 00:59:40,413 --> 00:59:42,115 that's produced all those. 1341 00:59:42,248 --> 00:59:44,317 Wait. I thought you didn't want to do that one. 1342 00:59:44,484 --> 00:59:46,252 Well, I mean... 1343 00:59:47,654 --> 00:59:49,656 He requested it. 1344 01:01:20,480 --> 01:01:22,820 What? 1345 01:01:26,319 --> 01:01:27,854 We should tour. 1346 01:01:29,489 --> 01:01:30,924 Yeah. 1347 01:01:31,240 --> 01:01:32,826 You and me, we should tour. 1348 01:01:32,992 --> 01:01:36,229 We should do like, you know, back in the day, small venues. 1349 01:01:37,230 --> 01:01:39,366 It's... It's... 1350 01:01:39,499 --> 01:01:41,835 It's still... It's... 1351 01:01:42,100 --> 01:01:44,104 I mean, you feel that, right? 1352 01:01:47,774 --> 01:01:49,900 You're right. 1353 01:01:49,109 --> 01:01:50,410 - About what? - It's bullshit. 1354 01:01:50,543 --> 01:01:51,678 The stuff I'm doing now is bullshit. 1355 01:01:51,678 --> 01:01:53,790 I didn't... 1356 01:01:53,213 --> 01:01:54,614 It's different. You and me was different. 1357 01:01:54,681 --> 01:01:57,550 It was... it was the real deal. 1358 01:02:03,256 --> 01:02:06,126 You know what I wrote on my lantern, right? 1359 01:02:06,226 --> 01:02:08,762 And I know what you wrote on yours. 1360 01:02:09,963 --> 01:02:12,799 - What? - Tell me. 1361 01:02:14,434 --> 01:02:16,369 It's none of your business. 1362 01:02:16,469 --> 01:02:18,905 Be honest. Just tell me. 1363 01:02:20,206 --> 01:02:23,209 - It wasn't about you. - Come on. It was. 1364 01:02:23,309 --> 01:02:25,545 I know you. 1365 01:02:25,712 --> 01:02:27,113 I know you're not happy. 1366 01:02:27,247 --> 01:02:29,115 What? No, you don't. 1367 01:02:29,249 --> 01:02:30,984 Making chutney with that cheese ball. 1368 01:02:31,117 --> 01:02:33,453 Don't talk about him like that. You don't know him. 1369 01:02:33,553 --> 01:02:36,156 I know that you miss this, us. 1370 01:02:36,322 --> 01:02:38,725 I'm... I'm not having this conversation, Herb. 1371 01:02:38,825 --> 01:02:40,560 Or you couldn't sing those songs. 1372 01:02:40,727 --> 01:02:41,795 Not like that. 1373 01:02:41,928 --> 01:02:43,229 They're just songs, Herb. 1374 01:02:43,396 --> 01:02:45,598 They're our songs. 1375 01:02:48,100 --> 01:02:49,602 Tell me I'm wrong, then. 1376 01:02:50,904 --> 01:02:54,740 I missed our music. 1377 01:02:54,174 --> 01:02:55,241 Not us. 1378 01:02:55,408 --> 01:02:57,143 It's the same thing. 1379 01:02:57,344 --> 01:02:58,812 It has to be. 1380 01:02:59,946 --> 01:03:02,449 That's all there is. 1381 01:03:05,850 --> 01:03:08,880 I still love you, Nell. 1382 01:03:08,455 --> 01:03:09,989 I shouldn't have come. I... 1383 01:03:10,123 --> 01:03:11,758 You... you knew what would happen. 1384 01:03:11,925 --> 01:03:13,593 - I didn't. I just... - Of course you did. 1385 01:03:13,760 --> 01:03:15,295 - No, I didn't. I just... - That's why you came. You... 1386 01:03:15,328 --> 01:03:19,265 I'm all over the place at the moment and... 1387 01:03:19,432 --> 01:03:21,868 pr... pregnant. 1388 01:03:25,772 --> 01:03:29,876 So... so I'm not getting into your bullshit, Herb, again. 1389 01:03:30,100 --> 01:03:32,445 I'm just not. 1390 01:03:33,146 --> 01:03:34,881 And you don't love me, okay? 1391 01:03:35,150 --> 01:03:37,183 You love the past. 1392 01:03:38,651 --> 01:03:42,188 And it was great... it was... but it's gone now. 1393 01:03:45,725 --> 01:03:48,628 It's time to grow up, Chris. 1394 01:05:05,872 --> 01:05:07,574 Nell? 1395 01:05:13,880 --> 01:05:15,615 Hello? 1396 01:05:17,984 --> 01:05:20,860 Charles? 1397 01:05:39,572 --> 01:05:42,976 Um, thanks for the hair. 1398 01:05:43,109 --> 01:05:45,780 It's the least I could do. 1399 01:05:47,130 --> 01:05:49,820 - I'm so sorry. - No. No, no, no. Honestly. 1400 01:05:49,249 --> 01:05:50,784 Stop it. I'm sorry. 1401 01:05:50,917 --> 01:05:52,585 Um... 1402 01:05:52,752 --> 01:05:56,890 We just couldn't, you know, get her back. 1403 01:05:57,230 --> 01:05:58,625 I thought we could. 1404 01:05:58,792 --> 01:06:00,593 I thought I could have the music without, you know, 1405 01:06:00,627 --> 01:06:04,664 the other stuff, but I just couldn't. 1406 01:06:05,980 --> 01:06:07,767 I don't think I helped matters per se. 1407 01:06:07,867 --> 01:06:09,436 Just in the old planning department. 1408 01:06:10,804 --> 01:06:12,639 Communications-wise, just... 1409 01:06:12,772 --> 01:06:16,776 Well, you know for next time, when you invite Fleetwood Mac. 1410 01:06:16,876 --> 01:06:18,945 Oh. Fleetwood Mac. 1411 01:06:19,145 --> 01:06:21,448 Not so much, no. Um... 1412 01:06:21,614 --> 01:06:24,451 No, it was always McGwyer Mortimer. 1413 01:06:24,617 --> 01:06:26,520 Marie's favorite. 1414 01:06:26,953 --> 01:06:28,154 She was, uh... 1415 01:06:28,288 --> 01:06:31,524 She loved you before she, um... 1416 01:06:35,280 --> 01:06:37,163 When did she die? 1417 01:06:37,297 --> 01:06:40,467 Five years ago, yeah, tomorrow. 1418 01:06:40,567 --> 01:06:42,736 Hence the gig. 1419 01:06:44,304 --> 01:06:46,306 Anyway, we should, um, 1420 01:06:46,473 --> 01:06:49,576 get a wiggle on, just boat-wise. 1421 01:06:49,709 --> 01:06:51,511 - He's the one you want. - Oh, God, yeah. Yes. 1422 01:06:51,644 --> 01:06:53,313 No, I mean... well, I mean... 1423 01:06:53,346 --> 01:06:54,481 No, no, no. No, I don't... I want both of you. 1424 01:06:54,481 --> 01:06:55,482 - No, I know. - Yeah, no. 1425 01:06:55,648 --> 01:06:56,649 For the harmonies, obviously. 1426 01:06:56,649 --> 01:06:57,650 - Yeah. - Famously. 1427 01:07:01,388 --> 01:07:03,323 You know what you need to do. 1428 01:07:03,423 --> 01:07:05,825 The Nell Mortimer solo album. 1429 01:07:05,992 --> 01:07:07,160 Yes. 1430 01:07:07,327 --> 01:07:09,696 No, it's a bad time. 1431 01:07:11,264 --> 01:07:13,433 Maybe that's where I come in. 1432 01:07:34,688 --> 01:07:36,690 The Kraken wakes. 1433 01:07:37,557 --> 01:07:39,926 - Is that... Is she on there? - Nell. 1434 01:07:40,930 --> 01:07:42,362 She, um... 1435 01:07:42,529 --> 01:07:44,364 She apologizes for sneaking off. 1436 01:07:44,464 --> 01:07:48,535 She just didn't feel she could quite get there musically. 1437 01:07:48,635 --> 01:07:50,637 I mean, I disagree... of course I do... 1438 01:07:50,770 --> 01:07:52,605 but I guess you arty types 1439 01:07:52,706 --> 01:07:55,709 are cut from slightly different cloth than I. 1440 01:07:55,875 --> 01:07:57,544 She, um... 1441 01:07:59,212 --> 01:08:01,470 Completely. 1442 01:08:01,147 --> 01:08:03,283 No, completely agree, Herb. 1443 01:08:03,383 --> 01:08:07,120 What do you think we're thinking, gig-wise, Herb? 1444 01:08:07,253 --> 01:08:10,924 Because from my POV, the show certainly can go on. 1445 01:08:11,910 --> 01:08:15,962 I mean, if you're happy to, um, play on your tod, as 'twere. 1446 01:08:16,129 --> 01:08:17,130 Herb. 1447 01:08:17,263 --> 01:08:19,933 Are you winding me up? 1448 01:08:20,133 --> 01:08:21,935 You've ruined my life. 1449 01:08:22,680 --> 01:08:24,237 - Have I? - I mean... 1450 01:08:24,404 --> 01:08:26,606 This is... 1451 01:08:26,773 --> 01:08:27,974 What have you done? 1452 01:08:28,975 --> 01:08:31,311 I don't know. What, uh... 1453 01:08:32,245 --> 01:08:33,747 I haven't seen her for nine years. 1454 01:08:33,913 --> 01:08:35,248 Before you engineer this, 1455 01:08:35,248 --> 01:08:36,516 chuck money at us, 1456 01:08:36,649 --> 01:08:38,251 throw us back together for your entertainment. 1457 01:08:38,284 --> 01:08:39,152 No, for the music, though, isn't it, huh? 1458 01:08:39,285 --> 01:08:40,320 Dripping shit into my ear. 1459 01:08:40,453 --> 01:08:41,855 When have I done that? Come on. 1460 01:08:42,880 --> 01:08:43,356 How we're so good together. 1461 01:08:43,490 --> 01:08:44,958 - You are. - We should be together. 1462 01:08:45,125 --> 01:08:46,593 But you should be. Musically, you should be. 1463 01:08:46,626 --> 01:08:47,827 - Come on, Herb. - Playing us like marionettes. 1464 01:08:47,827 --> 01:08:48,828 - No. - Yes. 1465 01:08:48,928 --> 01:08:51,164 - Herb, no. - Yes. 1466 01:08:51,264 --> 01:08:52,766 This was the plan all along, wasn't it? 1467 01:08:52,766 --> 01:08:54,134 - No, sir. - Get me dancing to your tune. 1468 01:08:54,167 --> 01:08:55,602 Shove your bloody hand up my ****. 1469 01:08:55,769 --> 01:08:57,470 I certainly do not want to shove it up there, 1470 01:08:57,504 --> 01:08:59,500 - thank you very much. - You're-you're like 1471 01:08:59,390 --> 01:09:00,106 - a cut-price Geppetto, mate. - I'm not. 1472 01:09:00,106 --> 01:09:01,474 That's all you are. 1473 01:09:01,608 --> 01:09:02,709 - Well, I'm not, you know... - Mm-hmm. 1474 01:09:02,709 --> 01:09:03,810 I'm not Pinocchio. 1475 01:09:03,943 --> 01:09:05,111 I know. 1476 01:09:05,211 --> 01:09:06,880 You're a real boy. 1477 01:09:09,149 --> 01:09:10,383 You've ruined my life. 1478 01:09:10,517 --> 01:09:12,485 I wish you'd stop staying that. 1479 01:09:12,619 --> 01:09:14,540 - You've ruined my life. - Herb. 1480 01:09:14,187 --> 01:09:15,655 I wish you'd stop staying that. Herb! 1481 01:09:30,637 --> 01:09:32,505 There is one at 5:00, but, um, 1482 01:09:32,672 --> 01:09:34,207 I don't think Peter will be, uh... 1483 01:09:34,374 --> 01:09:38,511 He tends not to risk it when the storm's up. 1484 01:09:38,645 --> 01:09:40,480 Um... 1485 01:09:40,814 --> 01:09:43,160 I mean, I would phone ahead, 1486 01:09:43,149 --> 01:09:44,684 but, um... 1487 01:09:44,818 --> 01:09:46,720 obviously, once you're at the phone box, I mean, 1488 01:09:46,853 --> 01:09:49,356 you're more or less there anyway, aren't you, so, uh... 1489 01:09:50,190 --> 01:09:52,726 The plectrum. 1490 01:09:53,159 --> 01:09:55,762 That's my guitar, you see. 1491 01:09:57,330 --> 01:10:00,660 Which, I mean, obviously, you can, um... 1492 01:10:00,200 --> 01:10:01,735 It feels appropriate that you... 1493 01:10:04,371 --> 01:10:06,106 Want a hand, Herb? 1494 01:10:07,507 --> 01:10:09,376 You all right, Herb? 1495 01:10:42,976 --> 01:10:44,944 Yeah, but can we charter one? 1496 01:10:45,111 --> 01:10:46,546 Charter. 1497 01:10:46,646 --> 01:10:49,616 It's just another word for "hire." 1498 01:10:49,749 --> 01:10:53,253 Could we hire a boat that can go in bad weather? 1499 01:10:53,920 --> 01:10:55,789 No, the gig's off, man. I'm not doing it. 1500 01:10:57,290 --> 01:10:58,992 Yeah, I know we need the money, Zeb. 1501 01:10:59,125 --> 01:11:00,560 I just... 1502 01:11:00,727 --> 01:11:02,228 Well, maybe I won't do the album, then. 1503 01:11:02,295 --> 01:11:04,164 I don't know. 1504 01:11:04,264 --> 01:11:06,332 Yeah, I'm serious. 1505 01:11:07,734 --> 01:11:09,169 Yes. 1506 01:11:09,335 --> 01:11:11,400 Yes, I saw it. I hate it. 1507 01:11:12,500 --> 01:11:14,740 Did they whiten my teeth? 1508 01:11:15,241 --> 01:11:17,143 On the image. 1509 01:11:18,745 --> 01:11:19,946 No. 1510 01:11:20,113 --> 01:11:23,830 No, it's not okay, no. 1511 01:11:23,249 --> 01:11:25,285 Because... 1512 01:11:25,418 --> 01:11:28,455 Because artists don't whiten their teeth, Zeb. 1513 01:11:28,588 --> 01:11:32,250 That's, like, the definition of an artist. 1514 01:11:32,959 --> 01:11:34,260 I don't know. 1515 01:11:34,361 --> 01:11:36,329 Because there isn't a boat, Zeb! 1516 01:11:36,496 --> 01:11:39,432 When there's a boat, I know when I'll be back! 1517 01:11:55,448 --> 01:11:57,500 Raining, is it? 1518 01:12:01,454 --> 01:12:03,156 Yeah. Um... 1519 01:12:03,289 --> 01:12:05,250 do you sell towels? 1520 01:12:05,158 --> 01:12:07,694 I got kitchen towels. 1521 01:12:07,827 --> 01:12:09,129 Okay. 1522 01:12:15,869 --> 01:12:18,304 Um, do you know? 1523 01:12:18,471 --> 01:12:19,706 Uh, two of those. 1524 01:12:19,873 --> 01:12:22,420 - Thanks. - Ta. 1525 01:12:22,175 --> 01:12:24,210 Leaving again? 1526 01:12:25,145 --> 01:12:27,414 Trying to. 1527 01:12:27,547 --> 01:12:31,985 Actually, um, could I leave my stuff here? 1528 01:12:32,152 --> 01:12:33,987 I'm getting the morning boat, 1529 01:12:34,870 --> 01:12:36,823 and I don't want to have to lug it all the way back to... 1530 01:12:36,990 --> 01:12:38,240 where I'm staying. 1531 01:12:38,191 --> 01:12:40,930 Yeah, sure. 1532 01:12:40,226 --> 01:12:42,950 Thanks. 1533 01:12:42,195 --> 01:12:44,364 Everything okay? 1534 01:12:44,497 --> 01:12:46,533 Um... 1535 01:12:46,666 --> 01:12:49,536 My son, he knows you. 1536 01:12:49,669 --> 01:12:51,871 He played me "Raspberry Fair." 1537 01:12:52,500 --> 01:12:53,840 I liked it. 1538 01:12:56,943 --> 01:12:58,945 Cool. Thank you. 1539 01:13:43,390 --> 01:13:45,225 Herb, it's Charles. 1540 01:13:45,392 --> 01:13:47,227 Obviously. 1541 01:13:47,494 --> 01:13:51,965 Just to say I-I left a bowl of soup outside your door. 1542 01:13:52,650 --> 01:13:53,800 In case you want it. 1543 01:13:53,933 --> 01:13:56,136 - No, thanks. - Well, it's there. 1544 01:13:56,236 --> 01:13:57,904 I mean... 1545 01:13:58,710 --> 01:14:01,174 just so you don't step in it, was my point. 1546 01:14:01,274 --> 01:14:03,510 I don't want it. 1547 01:14:05,578 --> 01:14:08,615 And, Herb, for what it's worth, I'm sorry. 1548 01:14:10,450 --> 01:14:13,186 I really didn't mean to do whatever it is that I've done. 1549 01:14:16,823 --> 01:14:18,925 I guess it's one of them, Herb. 1550 01:14:19,250 --> 01:14:22,195 Some things... 1551 01:14:22,595 --> 01:14:24,931 Some things, you just can't get back. 1552 01:15:13,713 --> 01:15:16,160 Help yourself. 1553 01:15:16,149 --> 01:15:17,584 I made coffee. 1554 01:15:17,751 --> 01:15:19,819 Thanks. Yeah, I didn't know you were... 1555 01:15:19,919 --> 01:15:22,188 - Just got back this morning. - Oh. 1556 01:15:23,189 --> 01:15:25,158 Uh, did you... did you see your puffin? 1557 01:15:25,325 --> 01:15:27,894 I saw a whole circus. 1558 01:15:28,280 --> 01:15:31,998 That's the term... a circus of puffins. 1559 01:15:33,233 --> 01:15:35,568 Great. 1560 01:15:35,735 --> 01:15:37,670 Hear the gig went well. 1561 01:15:38,872 --> 01:15:40,840 Charlie says you brought it forward a couple days. 1562 01:15:40,907 --> 01:15:42,442 I'm sorry I missed it. 1563 01:15:42,575 --> 01:15:45,679 But I suppose he wanted it to be a private thing. 1564 01:15:45,745 --> 01:15:49,349 I mean, that's what he paid for, so... 1565 01:15:52,585 --> 01:15:54,788 Yeah. I guess so. 1566 01:15:54,921 --> 01:15:57,624 I'm just glad it all worked out. 1567 01:15:58,591 --> 01:16:00,293 Yeah. Uh, me, too. 1568 01:16:01,394 --> 01:16:04,300 I mean, I know what happened. 1569 01:16:05,765 --> 01:16:09,135 I see you, Herb McGwyer. 1570 01:16:09,235 --> 01:16:11,304 See right through you. 1571 01:16:13,206 --> 01:16:14,708 And I get it. 1572 01:16:14,808 --> 01:16:17,277 All the stuff since Nell... 1573 01:16:17,410 --> 01:16:21,214 the collaborations, collabs... 1574 01:16:21,314 --> 01:16:23,216 it's embarrassing. 1575 01:16:25,552 --> 01:16:27,454 I mean, look at you. 1576 01:16:28,755 --> 01:16:30,724 You're a joke. 1577 01:16:32,292 --> 01:16:35,295 Guess we'd better get this boat, huh? 1578 01:16:49,175 --> 01:16:51,244 Thanks for everything, Charlie boy. 1579 01:16:51,344 --> 01:16:52,746 - Fare thee well. - Oh. 1580 01:16:52,846 --> 01:16:54,514 - Fare ye well indeed. - Fare thee well. 1581 01:16:54,681 --> 01:16:56,349 And love to Nell, of course. 1582 01:17:51,271 --> 01:17:53,273 No, no, no. 1583 01:17:54,674 --> 01:17:56,276 No. 1584 01:17:57,544 --> 01:17:58,878 Herb! 1585 01:17:59,713 --> 01:18:01,781 Herb! 1586 01:18:03,830 --> 01:18:05,285 Herb! 1587 01:18:06,252 --> 01:18:08,455 No, Herb! 1588 01:18:10,357 --> 01:18:12,559 Oh, my God, Herb. Herb! 1589 01:18:12,692 --> 01:18:13,793 Herb! 1590 01:18:13,960 --> 01:18:16,629 Come on. 1591 01:18:16,763 --> 01:18:19,132 Herb! Herb! Herb! 1592 01:18:19,265 --> 01:18:20,800 Oh, mercy me. 1593 01:18:20,934 --> 01:18:22,268 That's cold. Herb! 1594 01:18:22,402 --> 01:18:24,304 What are you doing? 1595 01:18:24,437 --> 01:18:25,572 Herb, don't do it! 1596 01:18:25,705 --> 01:18:27,874 Herb! 1597 01:18:28,875 --> 01:18:31,411 Herb! I'm gonna save you! 1598 01:18:31,544 --> 01:18:33,313 No! 1599 01:18:33,480 --> 01:18:35,810 Don't do it, Herb! 1600 01:18:35,215 --> 01:18:36,416 Herb! 1601 01:18:37,751 --> 01:18:39,152 Help me! 1602 01:18:41,921 --> 01:18:43,156 Herb! 1603 01:18:52,832 --> 01:18:55,168 Help me, Herb! 1604 01:19:00,473 --> 01:19:01,841 Charles! 1605 01:19:11,351 --> 01:19:12,519 Oh, my God. 1606 01:19:12,652 --> 01:19:14,454 Thank God you're okay! 1607 01:19:14,587 --> 01:19:15,855 What were you doing? 1608 01:19:15,989 --> 01:19:17,490 Oh, thank God you're okay, Herb! 1609 01:19:17,624 --> 01:19:19,325 You were the one shouting for help, Charles. 1610 01:19:21,194 --> 01:19:22,862 This was filling up. It's... 1611 01:19:22,996 --> 01:19:24,864 It's like swimming with an anvil, Herb. 1612 01:19:25,310 --> 01:19:27,701 No, no, I mean why... why were you out here? 1613 01:19:27,867 --> 01:19:28,968 You can stand up. 1614 01:19:29,135 --> 01:19:30,303 Why were you here?! 1615 01:19:30,503 --> 01:19:32,305 I was just swimming. 1616 01:19:33,773 --> 01:19:36,543 I thought it was more of a... 1617 01:19:36,710 --> 01:19:38,278 I was worried it was a situation. 1618 01:19:38,378 --> 01:19:41,548 What? What situation? 1619 01:19:41,881 --> 01:19:43,383 - Situation! - Wh-What do you mean? 1620 01:19:43,550 --> 01:19:44,984 Like a bad one, basically! 1621 01:19:45,151 --> 01:19:47,530 Well, it was pretty drowny out there for a minute. 1622 01:19:47,530 --> 01:19:48,655 I was just swimming, Charles. 1623 01:19:48,722 --> 01:19:50,357 Yeah, in your knick-knocks. 1624 01:19:50,523 --> 01:19:53,560 It doesn't exactly instill confidence, does it? 1625 01:19:58,565 --> 01:20:00,467 - You okay? - No. 1626 01:20:04,300 --> 01:20:06,373 You missed your boat. 1627 01:20:06,740 --> 01:20:08,975 I'll get a later one. There's a boat at 5:00. 1628 01:20:09,750 --> 01:20:11,711 Sometimes. Sometimes. 1629 01:20:13,546 --> 01:20:17,830 Why don't you stay? Just stay... one night, 1630 01:20:17,250 --> 01:20:20,754 and we'll have dinner. 1631 01:20:20,920 --> 01:20:22,756 I-I have a halibut. 1632 01:20:22,922 --> 01:20:24,924 Hell of a halibut. 1633 01:20:25,250 --> 01:20:27,930 - Did you, um... - We'll eat that, break bread. 1634 01:20:27,193 --> 01:20:30,960 Did you pay Nell anyway? 1635 01:20:30,530 --> 01:20:33,400 I'll pay you, too, Herb. I... You don't have to do the gig. 1636 01:20:33,533 --> 01:20:35,568 I'll pay you, too. I-I-I'll pay you, too. 1637 01:20:35,735 --> 01:20:37,437 And then tomorrow you set sail, 1638 01:20:37,570 --> 01:20:40,940 you-you-you set off with the money. 1639 01:20:43,900 --> 01:20:45,780 Take the money and run. 1640 01:20:45,945 --> 01:20:49,490 Well, that's my indecent proposal. 1641 01:20:49,215 --> 01:20:51,510 Decent proposal, really. 1642 01:20:51,184 --> 01:20:53,286 It's not a bad one. 1643 01:21:06,433 --> 01:21:09,690 Just don't suddenly go swimming, man, 1644 01:21:09,202 --> 01:21:11,638 in your underpants. 1645 01:23:20,834 --> 01:23:22,350 Zeb. 1646 01:23:22,168 --> 01:23:23,603 Hey. I, um... 1647 01:23:23,770 --> 01:23:25,905 I was just about to call you. 1648 01:23:26,390 --> 01:23:29,609 Yeah, I know. Um, I-I guess the rice. 1649 01:23:29,776 --> 01:23:31,770 Back from the dead. 1650 01:23:38,785 --> 01:23:40,854 Well, I mean, that's, um... 1651 01:24:03,243 --> 01:24:05,612 Finally. 1652 01:24:09,449 --> 01:24:11,317 Right, then, old friend. 1653 01:24:11,451 --> 01:24:13,486 Let's get you over with. 1654 01:24:18,291 --> 01:24:19,626 Oh, um... 1655 01:24:19,759 --> 01:24:21,327 - Hello. - Hello. 1656 01:24:21,494 --> 01:24:23,960 - I'm sorry I'm so late. - It's all right. 1657 01:24:27,934 --> 01:24:30,300 Sorry. In what way late? 1658 01:24:30,103 --> 01:24:32,806 Oh, for the, um... 1659 01:24:32,906 --> 01:24:34,808 uh, for this. 1660 01:24:34,974 --> 01:24:36,843 Uh... 1661 01:24:37,177 --> 01:24:39,846 He, uh... he dropped it off. 1662 01:24:39,946 --> 01:24:42,349 Your friend. Uh, I can't remember his name. 1663 01:24:42,482 --> 01:24:44,851 - Herb. - Herb. 1664 01:24:44,984 --> 01:24:46,519 He's doing the bloody gig. 1665 01:24:46,653 --> 01:24:48,210 Herb is. 1666 01:24:48,188 --> 01:24:50,623 Oh, my God. Herb, mate, what you doing? 1667 01:24:50,790 --> 01:24:52,926 He's doing it. 1668 01:24:53,760 --> 01:24:55,161 Oh, crikey. 1669 01:24:55,295 --> 01:24:57,197 I've just baked an entire halibut. 1670 01:24:57,364 --> 01:24:59,199 Uh, have it after. 1671 01:24:59,332 --> 01:25:00,967 Got to be, hasn't it? 1672 01:25:01,134 --> 01:25:02,335 Gig, then fish. 1673 01:25:02,469 --> 01:25:04,300 - Delish. - Delish. 1674 01:25:05,638 --> 01:25:07,374 Flask. 1675 01:25:09,376 --> 01:25:12,345 Sorry. Just gonna get a thermos flask for the gig. 1676 01:25:12,512 --> 01:25:13,947 Oh. 1677 01:25:27,293 --> 01:25:28,895 It's started. 1678 01:25:30,864 --> 01:25:32,465 Don't crunch them. 1679 01:25:35,869 --> 01:25:37,704 - All right. - Hello. 1680 01:25:37,871 --> 01:25:40,573 Thought you weren't coming. 1681 01:25:59,826 --> 01:26:01,261 Oh, God. 1682 01:26:01,361 --> 01:26:03,563 - Yes, please. Yes, please. - Thank you. 1683 01:26:03,663 --> 01:26:05,980 Thanks very much. 1684 01:26:05,265 --> 01:26:07,100 Okay, Wallis Island, how you feeling? 1685 01:26:07,267 --> 01:26:09,569 Well, well, well, fantastic, Herb. 1686 01:26:09,736 --> 01:26:11,404 We'll start with a couple old classics. 1687 01:26:11,504 --> 01:26:13,273 - Yes. - Um, and this is 1688 01:26:13,406 --> 01:26:15,208 track number five from our first album, Morning Haze. 1689 01:26:15,241 --> 01:26:16,743 - Okay, Charl... - "Raspberry Fair"! 1690 01:26:16,876 --> 01:26:18,445 - Thank-thank you, Charles. - Correctamundo. 1691 01:26:18,445 --> 01:26:20,680 Uh, you-you know this one, Amanda, at least. 1692 01:26:35,729 --> 01:26:37,764 Everybody now! 1693 01:27:09,429 --> 01:27:11,640 Careful. 1694 01:27:24,944 --> 01:27:26,680 - Oh, sorry. - Oh, that's bright. 1695 01:27:26,846 --> 01:27:28,648 - Whoo! - Yes, please, Herb! 1696 01:27:43,630 --> 01:27:45,265 Oh! 1697 01:27:45,365 --> 01:27:46,833 - It had to end. - There we go. 1698 01:27:46,966 --> 01:27:48,868 All good things, Herb. Another one of them. 1699 01:27:49,350 --> 01:27:51,705 Another one of them, Herb! 1700 01:27:54,874 --> 01:27:58,511 So, this is a song about lost love, 1701 01:27:58,645 --> 01:28:02,816 and it's the last time I'm ever gonna play this. 1702 01:28:04,484 --> 01:28:06,553 So I hope you're listening, Marie. 1703 01:30:12,946 --> 01:30:14,848 That's lovely, in't it? 1704 01:30:16,750 --> 01:30:19,190 Just the sheer... 1705 01:30:19,185 --> 01:30:21,588 majesty of it, power. 1706 01:30:22,655 --> 01:30:26,426 It is a serious contender, isn't it? 1707 01:30:26,593 --> 01:30:27,827 Shh. 1708 01:30:27,994 --> 01:30:29,429 It... 1709 01:30:29,529 --> 01:30:31,431 Yeah, shh. 1710 01:30:31,531 --> 01:30:33,330 The waves. 1711 01:30:33,166 --> 01:30:34,534 No, shh like... 1712 01:30:34,667 --> 01:30:36,360 - Shut up? - Don't say anything. 1713 01:30:36,169 --> 01:30:37,704 Yeah. Sling your hook. 1714 01:30:37,871 --> 01:30:41,374 - Just take it in, Charles. - Take it in. Drink it in. 1715 01:30:41,508 --> 01:30:43,343 Glug, glug. 1716 01:30:45,812 --> 01:30:48,480 Water, water everywhere. 1717 01:30:48,214 --> 01:30:50,684 You would be absolutely bonkers, well, to drink it. 1718 01:30:50,784 --> 01:30:52,118 Well, you would be. 1719 01:30:52,218 --> 01:30:54,540 Packed full of salt. 1720 01:30:56,890 --> 01:30:59,250 - Ah, yes. - Right, well, don't forget 1721 01:30:59,250 --> 01:31:00,393 - your, uh... There you are. - Yeah. 1722 01:31:00,493 --> 01:31:02,195 - You got it? The money. - Yeah. 1723 01:31:02,328 --> 01:31:04,531 The magnificent moola. 1724 01:31:04,664 --> 01:31:07,634 Oh. Love that. 1725 01:31:08,401 --> 01:31:10,236 Herb McGwyer with the ocean. 1726 01:31:10,370 --> 01:31:11,871 If you could see yourself now. 1727 01:31:12,500 --> 01:31:13,907 Well, you wouldn't be there. You... 1728 01:31:14,400 --> 01:31:15,241 Shut up. 1729 01:31:15,375 --> 01:31:18,110 Shut up and shove off, Charles. 1730 01:31:20,130 --> 01:31:21,581 - Thank you, Charles. - Oh, God, right. 1731 01:31:21,748 --> 01:31:23,717 We're doing that, are we? 1732 01:31:25,852 --> 01:31:29,550 Thank you, Charles. 1733 01:31:31,224 --> 01:31:33,593 Thank you, Herb, really. 1734 01:31:36,930 --> 01:31:38,998 Really. 1735 01:31:41,234 --> 01:31:43,603 Okay. 1736 01:31:44,704 --> 01:31:46,773 - Okay. - Okay. 1737 01:32:01,688 --> 01:32:04,240 There he is. 1738 01:32:04,190 --> 01:32:06,226 Herb McGwyer. 1739 01:32:07,594 --> 01:32:09,295 Legend. 1740 01:32:10,563 --> 01:32:12,265 Waving. 1741 01:32:12,432 --> 01:32:14,670 Oh, wave back. 1742 01:32:19,239 --> 01:32:21,141 The double. 1743 01:32:29,983 --> 01:32:31,151 Right. 1744 01:32:31,317 --> 01:32:34,254 A little bit of lunch, methinks. 1745 01:32:35,989 --> 01:32:38,324 First, breakfast. 1746 01:32:38,425 --> 01:32:40,393 The thorny issue of breakfast. 1747 01:35:32,132 --> 01:35:33,833 Okay, this is, um, 1748 01:35:34,000 --> 01:35:37,837 "The Ballad of Wallis Island" by Chris Pinner. 1749 01:35:37,971 --> 01:35:39,506 Take one.