1
00:00:00,934 --> 00:00:03,303
(****) We 're going to start very
soon, Maurice. Sorry for the wait.

2
00:00:03,303 --> 00:00:04,771
(Maurice) Don't worry.

3
00:00:04,904 --> 00:00:08,408
(Runner) Can I get you anything? Coffee?
(Maurice) Do you have any tea?

4
00:00:08,508 --> 00:00:13,313
(Runner) We have some tea.
(Maurice) A cup of tea. Milk, six sugars.

5
00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:16,316
(Runner) Six?
(Maurice) Yes, six, please. Thank you.

6
00:00:16,449 --> 00:00:18,385
(Tech) Can you give me some levels?

7
00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:21,154
(Maurice) Some what?
(Tech) Can you talk to me?

8
00:00:21,254 --> 00:00:25,191
(Maurice) Has the interview started?
Cos I just ordered some tea.

9
00:00:25,325 --> 00:00:27,360
(Tech) That's perfect.
(****) Ok.

10
00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,329
(****) We good?
(Cameraman) Rolling.

11
00:00:29,429 --> 00:00:32,732
(Maurice) Haven't got me tea.
(****) All right. We're good to go.

12
00:00:32,866 --> 00:00:36,302
- In three, two, one.
- (Clapperboard claps)

13
00:00:43,109 --> 00:00:46,613
(****) I'm here
with a legend of the golfing world.

14
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:50,984
A man who has broken records
and rewritten the history books.

15
00:00:51,484 --> 00:00:53,219
Maurice flitcroft.

16
00:00:55,255 --> 00:00:56,656
Bless me.

17
00:00:56,756 --> 00:01:00,527
You made your name
in the British open in 1976.

18
00:01:00,660 --> 00:01:04,531
Now, why did you choose
that particular tournament?

19
00:01:04,631 --> 00:01:07,300
Well, it was...
More it chose me, really.

20
00:01:07,434 --> 00:01:09,350
It was a calling.

21
00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:11,604
You Americans
might call it a destiny.

22
00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:14,441
And it was an unlikely destiny,
wasn't it?

23
00:01:14,574 --> 00:01:18,578
Because you were working as a
crane operator at the time. Am I right?

24
00:01:18,678 --> 00:01:23,983
Yes. When I took up
the game of golf in, uh, 1975,

25
00:01:24,117 --> 00:01:28,488
I were working full time as a crane driver,
or operator, as you would say.

26
00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:32,425
80, well, tell us about
the young Maurice flitcroft.

27
00:01:32,926 --> 00:01:36,396
Did you dream
of becoming a sportsman as a child?

28
00:01:36,529 --> 00:01:38,231
Uh, I had dreams.

29
00:01:38,365 --> 00:01:41,468
But, uh, you know, where I...
Where I come from,

30
00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:43,303
barrow-in-furness,

31
00:01:43,436 --> 00:01:46,573
it's a small world, put it like that.

32
00:01:46,673 --> 00:01:48,575
(Cheerful instrumental music)

33
00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:03,990
The only job options for a lad like me
was the yard. Shipyard.

34
00:02:04,900 --> 00:02:07,270
Shipyard fodder,
they used to call us.

35
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,529
Me dad worked there
and his father before 'im.

36
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,965
You go in on your feet.

37
00:02:12,980 --> 00:02:13,900
You come out in a box.

38
00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:18,738
Oh, as a child,
I did have ambitions, of course,

39
00:02:18,838 --> 00:02:21,408
that I might do,
you know, something else.

40
00:02:21,508 --> 00:02:25,780
But any dreams I had
tended to end up in pieces.

41
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:31,818
When the war came, I was sent to live
with a very nice family in Scotland.

42
00:02:33,353 --> 00:02:36,823
Things were very different there.
They'd say things like...

43
00:02:36,923 --> 00:02:39,325
What do you want to be
when you grow up?

44
00:02:39,426 --> 00:02:42,595
Probablyjust be in the shipyard
like me dad.

45
00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,531
Och! You can be anything you want.

46
00:02:44,631 --> 00:02:46,533
The world is your oyster.

47
00:02:46,633 --> 00:02:48,968
(Maurice) I read books.
I learnt languages.

48
00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:50,537
I played the violin.

49
00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:53,506
I played to a very high standard, actually.

50
00:02:53,640 --> 00:02:54,974
(Scratchy noise)

51
00:02:55,909 --> 00:02:58,411
Never mind, Maurice. Practice.

52
00:02:58,511 --> 00:03:00,847
Practice is the road to perfection.

53
00:03:00,980 --> 00:03:04,884
(Maurice) Or! Would have done
if the war hadn't ended, but it did.

54
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:08,188
So, I was soon back in barrow.

55
00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:11,224
Ended up shipyard fodder after all.

56
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:12,359
(Laughs)

57
00:03:13,326 --> 00:03:18,131
(****) And it was at the shipyard
that you met your wife Jean, right?

58
00:03:18,264 --> 00:03:21,267
(Maurice) Yes, I did.
I used to apply for other jobs.

59
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,203
Tried lots of different things,

60
00:03:23,303 --> 00:03:27,700
and she'd let me use
the post in the office for free.

61
00:03:28,608 --> 00:03:30,176
She was very kind to me.

62
00:03:31,578 --> 00:03:35,949
In the evenings she ran,
like, a theatre group for wayward kids.

63
00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:41,988
We got on like a house on fire.
Pretty soon, I popped the question.

64
00:03:43,189 --> 00:03:46,159
Jean Patterson, will you marry me?

65
00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:50,960
I promise I'll give you champagne,

66
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:51,364
caviar,

67
00:03:51,865 --> 00:03:53,299
diamonds.

68
00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:55,869
- We'll travel the world together.
- Stop.

69
00:03:56,936 --> 00:03:59,639
(Maurice) Turns out
she had a kid. Michael.

70
00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:04,144
Out of wedlock n'all.
Which was a big deal in those days.

71
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:06,880
They call him all sorts at school.

72
00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:09,683
"Son of a *****".

73
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:11,785
"Little *******".

74
00:04:12,686 --> 00:04:14,387
(Maurice) Kids can be cruel.

75
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:16,256
That's the teachers.

76
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:23,863
So... he never knew his dad?

77
00:04:24,531 --> 00:04:26,933
No. Never even met him.

78
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:30,537
As far as he knows,
he doesn't have a dad.

79
00:04:32,906 --> 00:04:34,274
Well, he does now.

80
00:04:34,908 --> 00:04:36,843
(Romantic instrumental music)

81
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:45,385
All of a sudden, my own dreams,
well, they were put on hold.

82
00:04:45,518 --> 00:04:47,387
Cos we were a family now.

83
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:50,190
I had to help Michael
find his dreams.

84
00:04:50,323 --> 00:04:53,360
Well, take your pick, son.
World's your oyster.

85
00:04:53,493 --> 00:04:55,395
That's for me. Racing driver.

86
00:04:55,528 --> 00:04:58,310
Astronaut.
Do you fancy a trip to the moon?

87
00:04:59,899 --> 00:05:00,900
- Engineering?
- Yeah.

88
00:05:01,340 --> 00:05:02,369
Want to read my book?

89
00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:05,472
- What do you think?
- Put it the other way round.

90
00:05:06,239 --> 00:05:10,143
(Maurice) Mikey got a degree.
Ended up a manager at the yard.

91
00:05:10,276 --> 00:05:13,213
I always fancied
a pop at academia meself,

92
00:05:13,346 --> 00:05:15,115
but pretty soon,

93
00:05:15,215 --> 00:05:18,385
we had not one,
but two more mouths to feed.

94
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:21,540
Gene and James. Twins.

95
00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:23,556
They loved disco dancing.

96
00:05:24,224 --> 00:05:26,920
Even won the school cup.

97
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:29,796
(Melancholic instrumental music)

98
00:05:31,431 --> 00:05:33,600
- (Indistinct)
- (Music continues)

99
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,703
As for me own dreams, well,

100
00:05:36,803 --> 00:05:39,939
by now they were...
They were a distant memory.

101
00:05:40,730 --> 00:05:42,108
But I made my peace with it.

102
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:47,147
Then came the summer of 1975

103
00:05:47,714 --> 00:05:50,717
and, well... everything changed.

104
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,530
(Music building)

105
00:06:01,227 --> 00:06:04,431
- Have a look in the microwave.
- I prefer my own one.

106
00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:07,330
Gas ovens are basically mini bombs.

107
00:06:07,133 --> 00:06:10,603
Out. It's not gone off yet,
so I think we're all right.

108
00:06:10,737 --> 00:06:14,140
Can you lot shut up in there?
Out of the kitchen! Thank you.

109
00:06:14,274 --> 00:06:15,508
(Twins) Oh, yeah.

110
00:06:16,810 --> 00:06:20,113
Hey! Stop doing your stupid dancing
near the new TV!

111
00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,881
- It's not stupid!
- Gaom.

112
00:06:22,150 --> 00:06:24,851
- We're professional disco dancers.
- That's not a job.

113
00:06:24,984 --> 00:06:27,387
Dad, tell him it's a job.
It is a real job.

114
00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:30,223
Good a job as any.
How do you switch this on?

115
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:33,660
- You've got to use the remote.
- Get out of that. Come on.

116
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:37,464
- Get off! This top is gabicci!
- Ooh, it's gabicci, is it?

117
00:06:37,597 --> 00:06:40,533
- Can you pipe it down in there?
- — quiet, boys.

118
00:06:40,633 --> 00:06:42,302
Watch this. Can you do that?

119
00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:44,904
Use that to change the channels.
It's got loads.

120
00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:47,730
- How many?
- Three.

121
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,675
Blimey.

122
00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:51,611
You can use that
from anywhere in the room.

123
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:54,447
Why can't you use
the switches on the side?

124
00:06:54,547 --> 00:06:56,950
- J“ gabicci, baby... j“
- get off!

125
00:06:57,500 --> 00:07:00,186
Why do you have to use the remote?
Can't you use switches?

126
00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:03,356
- But what's the point?
- I might be standing by.

127
00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:04,858
Shut it!

128
00:07:04,991 --> 00:07:06,920
(Music continues)

129
00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:07,394
(Whines)

130
00:07:07,527 --> 00:07:08,695
(Chatter on TV)

131
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:12,265
Dinner is served.

132
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:17,904
'We've left Newton
and we're chugging across the Atlantic.'

133
00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:19,939
'the spacecraft is shown by...'

134
00:07:20,730 --> 00:07:22,809
look, don't quote me on this, but...

135
00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:25,845
Well, it's top secret.

136
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:30,216
The, uh...
The yard's gonna be nationalised.

137
00:07:30,350 --> 00:07:31,451
Government's taking over.

138
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:38,892
And Hopkins has put me
in charge of the changeover.

139
00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:42,429
Well... it's good for you, son.

140
00:07:43,229 --> 00:07:47,534
He must have a lot of faith in you,
giving you a big job like that.

141
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:49,302
Yeah, I suppose.

142
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,472
But could be bad, dad.

143
00:07:53,740 --> 00:07:57,310
There's gonna be a lot of redundancies
when the axe falls.

144
00:07:57,911 --> 00:08:00,113
I mean... a lot.

145
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:10,690
(Maurice) They need you, he says.
So, that's good.

146
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,859
What about you?

147
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:16,696
Oh, well.
I'll get another job if it comes to it.

148
00:08:18,398 --> 00:08:20,400
- What job?
- I don't know.

149
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:23,370
There's always the bins.

150
00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:24,571
(Maurice chuckles)

151
00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:29,750
- Come 'ere.
- I'm doing...

152
00:08:29,976 --> 00:08:30,977
Maurice.

153
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,484
What is it?

154
00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:39,686
Sit down.

155
00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:44,357
Hey.

156
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:50,296
I knew a young man once.
Said he was gonna be a somebody.

157
00:08:53,330 --> 00:08:57,404
Promised me diamonds,
caviar, champagne.

158
00:08:58,571 --> 00:09:00,306
"Travel the world", he said.

159
00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:04,244
Sounds like you...
You should've married him.

160
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:12,719
I know you've made
sacrifices for us, Maurice.

161
00:09:14,870 --> 00:09:16,656
You don't have
to look after us anymore.

162
00:09:18,910 --> 00:09:19,259
It's your turn now.

163
00:09:20,894 --> 00:09:21,895
For what?

164
00:09:22,929 --> 00:09:24,864
Well, it's up to you, in't it?

165
00:09:25,598 --> 00:09:27,467
Can't think of everything.

166
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,475
(Melancholic instrumental music)

167
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:02,102
What we got today?

168
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:03,737
- Cheese and pickle.
- Ooh.

169
00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:06,906
- What?
- That is my favourite, that is.

170
00:10:07,700 --> 00:10:12,245
We've been hearing rumours there might be
some business going on. You heard anything?

171
00:10:13,179 --> 00:10:16,549
Look, uh, I shouldn't be telling you,
lads, it's secret.

172
00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:19,552
But, uh... it's being nationalised.

173
00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:23,356
- What does that mean?
- Redundancies. Lots of 'em.

174
00:10:23,490 --> 00:10:26,359
So, if I were you,
I'd get looking for something else.

175
00:10:27,930 --> 00:10:28,228
Shit.

176
00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:31,264
I see it as an opportunity, actually.
Why not?

177
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:35,201
What we got to lose?
"Seek and thou shalt find" and all that.

178
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:38,405
Willie, there must be something
you always wanted to do,

179
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:41,174
if you could do anything
in the whole world, what would you do?

180
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:43,943
- I don't know.
- What do you like doing?

181
00:10:44,770 --> 00:10:45,780
Mmm...

182
00:10:45,679 --> 00:10:46,880
Drinking guinness.

183
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,818
Well, open an Irish pub.

184
00:10:51,951 --> 00:10:53,853
Your own Irish pub in barrow.

185
00:10:54,754 --> 00:10:58,224
- Cliff, you can go back to your old job.
- What old job?

186
00:10:58,358 --> 00:11:00,560
You said you did a bank job once.

187
00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:03,129
Right, yeah, um... well, that's a...

188
00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:05,432
That's a young man's game, mate.

189
00:11:05,565 --> 00:11:08,435
Oh, come on, lads.
We're in the prime of our lives.

190
00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:10,804
Shouldn't be talking like that.

191
00:11:10,937 --> 00:11:12,272
(Indistinct chatter)

192
00:11:18,478 --> 00:11:21,147
(Jean) I'm going up, love.
What are you doing?

193
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:24,384
I've gotta finish
this flipping nun's habit.

194
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:28,221
- Don't be too late. You'll hurt your eyes.
- It has to be done.

195
00:11:30,757 --> 00:11:32,492
(Jean) Night. (Maurice) Night.

196
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:34,761
(Jean) Night, love.

197
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:44,671
(Mumbling)

198
00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:55,982
'I believe that the job you do
is fundamental

199
00:11:56,116 --> 00:11:57,884
to the future of britain.'

200
00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:01,521
(Tony) 'Newton from the bunker.'

201
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,158
(applause)

202
00:12:07,594 --> 00:12:09,195
'And now to Watson.'

203
00:12:13,867 --> 00:12:15,735
(audience react)

204
00:12:15,869 --> 00:12:17,804
'Just misses on the right.'

205
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:19,172
(applause)

206
00:12:20,774 --> 00:12:22,676
'If he can just get this in...'

207
00:12:32,285 --> 00:12:35,522
'It's all on this
to equal Watson's score.'

208
00:12:43,290 --> 00:12:44,764
(Applause)

209
00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:47,567
'The title goes to Tom Watson.'

210
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:51,805
'on his first appearance
at this tournament.'

211
00:12:57,844 --> 00:13:00,380
(Instrumental music)

212
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:09,550
'The new champion, Tom Watson.'

213
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:10,857
'what a dream come true.'

214
00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:16,930
(music building)

215
00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:34,714
(Music slows down)

216
00:14:18,580 --> 00:14:19,325
(Screams)

217
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:23,897
(Laughs)

218
00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:29,436
Whoa!

219
00:14:29,936 --> 00:14:31,204
(Laughs)

220
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:32,439
Whoa!

221
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:37,177
(Tony) 'So, there we have it.'

222
00:14:37,310 --> 00:14:39,145
'what an image to end on.'

223
00:14:39,279 --> 00:14:41,715
'Tom Watson
with the famous claret jug.'

224
00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:46,720
'i hope you'll join me, Tony marsh,
and the rest of the commentary team

225
00:14:46,853 --> 00:14:48,888
for the dunlop British masters.'

226
00:14:49,220 --> 00:14:50,230
(James) Dad.

227
00:14:51,858 --> 00:14:54,394
- You all right, love?
- We heard screaming.

228
00:15:03,603 --> 00:15:06,573
- Where is it?
- (Jean) What you looking for, love?

229
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:19,185
(I the drifters: "You're more
than a number in my little red book" j“)

230
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:22,422
J“ oh-oh-oh j“

231
00:15:22,555 --> 00:15:23,556
j“ yeah j“

232
00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,910
j“ yesj“

233
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:30,897
j“ you're more than a number
in my little red book j“

234
00:15:31,310 --> 00:15:35,301
j“ you're more than a one-night date j“

235
00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:39,105
j“ all it had to take me
was just one look j“

236
00:15:39,239 --> 00:15:41,474
j“ my heart began a thumpin' j“

237
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:44,310
j“ babe, you had it jumpin'
cos you're more... j“j“

238
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,479
- (Maurice) Golf.
- Golf?

239
00:15:46,980 --> 00:15:47,981
Aye, golf.

240
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:52,452
- Golf?
- Saw it last night on me new telly.

241
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:56,923
Want to have a crack at the British open.
Ten grand if you win it.

242
00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,826
Ten grand? Bloody hell.

243
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:02,595
How do you go about
getting in the British open?

244
00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:05,799
Idunno,
that's what I've got to find out.

245
00:16:05,932 --> 00:16:09,302
"Bartender, beautician, buses".

246
00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:12,439
Sorry, there's nothing
about the British open.

247
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:17,177
- That's disappointing.
- Maybe ask someone at your golf club.

248
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:19,512
- No, I'm not a member of a club.
- Ok.

249
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:24,384
So, do you know anyone
who has anything to do with golf?

250
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,488
(Phones ringing)

251
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:31,391
Hang on.

252
00:16:32,192 --> 00:16:33,893
Yes, I do. I do.

253
00:16:34,270 --> 00:16:38,465
J“ you're more than a one-night date j“

254
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:41,568
j“ all it had to take me
was just one look j“

255
00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:43,970
j“ my heart began a thumpin' j“

256
00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:46,773
j“ babe, you had it jumpin'
cos you're more j“j“

257
00:16:46,906 --> 00:16:47,774
(song stops)

258
00:16:47,907 --> 00:16:52,145
(Jean) Mind your fingers.
(James) Right. Next. What is a par?

259
00:16:52,278 --> 00:16:55,482
A par is the optimum amount of shots
on any given hole.

260
00:16:55,615 --> 00:16:59,619
So, for example, on a par four,
the optimal amount of shots is four.

261
00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:02,822
Correct. What is a birdie?

262
00:17:02,922 --> 00:17:06,893
(Maurice) One shot under the par.
80, for example, par four, three.

263
00:17:07,270 --> 00:17:08,428
Uh, and a bogey?

264
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:12,198
Bogey? I know that one, dad.
Here, that's one of these, mate.

265
00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:13,566
(Maurice) Wow.

266
00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:18,772
- Oh, they're even better than I thought.
- So shiny, aren't they?

267
00:17:18,905 --> 00:17:20,974
These were the cheapest ones n'all.

268
00:17:21,107 --> 00:17:22,409
- Really?
- Look.

269
00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:24,944
- Crikey.
- Number 90.

270
00:17:25,780 --> 00:17:28,882
- Need to be a millionaire to play this.
- You should see what the clothes cost.

271
00:17:29,150 --> 00:17:30,984
- Really?
- Might get cliff onto it.

272
00:17:31,117 --> 00:17:33,486
'...Maurice flitcroft
in barrow-in-furness.'

273
00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:36,220
- dad! You're on telly!
- No, what?

274
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:37,490
Yeah, sh, come, come.

275
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:40,427
"'...getting into the British open
championship,

276
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:43,129
as I quite fancy lifting
the old claret jug".'

277
00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:45,532
'well, Maurice, all you have to do

278
00:17:45,632 --> 00:17:48,768
is write to the royal & ancient golf club
in st Andrews, Scotland,

279
00:17:48,902 --> 00:17:50,937
and they'll send you an entry form.'

280
00:17:51,710 --> 00:17:52,472
'but remember,

281
00:17:52,605 --> 00:17:56,476
ask your mum and dad before
you use all their stamps and things.'

282
00:17:56,609 --> 00:18:01,147
'always warms my ****les when we get letters
from keen youngsters like little Maurice.'

283
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:09,689
"Left arm
perpendicular to the sternum."

284
00:18:11,825 --> 00:18:14,270
"Head at 30 degrees."

285
00:18:15,950 --> 00:18:17,397
"Knees flexed at 20."

286
00:18:17,964 --> 00:18:19,632
Just try and hit the ball.

287
00:18:21,301 --> 00:18:22,702
- Ah!
- (Dog barking)

288
00:18:23,536 --> 00:18:24,938
What are you playing at?

289
00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:28,740
Sorry! Flipping heck!

290
00:18:29,509 --> 00:18:31,511
- I don't owe you anything?
- No.

291
00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:33,279
- For all this?
- No. No.

292
00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:37,150
I got all this and all this
from my mate John down the market.

293
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:38,885
- This too?
- Yeah.

294
00:18:39,190 --> 00:18:41,870
- Suede.
- It's good stuff, innit?

295
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:42,989
That's perfect.

296
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:44,357
(Cliff laughs)

297
00:18:45,692 --> 00:18:48,940
Deorum vestimenta sua.

298
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:49,229
You what?

299
00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:51,731
Clothes of the gods, cliff.

300
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:55,680
Well, he only gets the best,
does Jim.

301
00:18:55,201 --> 00:18:56,803
I thought it were John.

302
00:18:56,936 --> 00:18:59,472
John. John. Yeah, John.
Yeah, good lad, John.

303
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:03,243
Sandwiches look nice, Jean.

304
00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:06,479
Love. Can you stop worrying
about what you look like?

305
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:09,282
- Got to finish filling in this form first.
- Hm.

306
00:19:10,884 --> 00:19:12,719
What does that mean, handicap?

307
00:19:12,852 --> 00:19:15,855
That must be me ailments, I suppose.

308
00:19:15,989 --> 00:19:20,560
Oh, like your false teeth?
Lumbago. Touch of arthritis.

309
00:19:20,694 --> 00:19:22,862
- Shall I put that down?
- Aye.

310
00:19:22,962 --> 00:19:24,798
- Hello.
- You all right, lads?

311
00:19:26,660 --> 00:19:28,401
- Here you go, dad.
- What's that?

312
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:31,805
- So you can practise on a proper course.
- We got it dancing on the street.

313
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:34,841
Should've seen it.
They were just chucking it at us.

314
00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:36,900
That's incredible.

315
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:40,613
What do you hope to achieve?
You know, with this dancing lark.

316
00:19:40,714 --> 00:19:41,848
- Money.
- Birds.

317
00:19:43,149 --> 00:19:47,654
"We're all of us in the gutter, but some of
us are looking at the stars." Who said that?

318
00:19:47,754 --> 00:19:48,988
- Oscar wilde.
- (Mouthing)

319
00:19:49,890 --> 00:19:52,892
- What do you think he meant?
- (Cliff) Don't sleep in the gutter.

320
00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:55,695
Aim for the stars.

321
00:19:55,829 --> 00:19:58,865
I mean, isn't there a trophy
or a world cup or summat?

322
00:19:59,432 --> 00:20:00,700
Yeah, think so.

323
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:04,504
- Well, enter it! Go and win it!
- But what if we lose?

324
00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:07,907
It doesn't matter.
At least you tried. That's the main thing.

325
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,610
There's more to life
than money, boys.

326
00:20:10,744 --> 00:20:11,778
- Ain't that right?
- Yeah.

327
00:20:11,845 --> 00:20:14,881
Though, having said that,
money is flipping handy.

328
00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:18,151
Especially if you play golf.

329
00:20:18,284 --> 00:20:19,190
- Yeah.
- Cheers!

330
00:20:19,152 --> 00:20:22,222
- You're welcome, dad.
- Thanks. Look at that, Jean.

331
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:24,491
- Oh, hang on a minute.
- It's heavy.

332
00:20:24,591 --> 00:20:28,728
It says: "Don't need a handicap
if you're a professional."

333
00:20:29,396 --> 00:20:33,700
Well, cross out that other stuff.
Tick professional. Make things easier.

334
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:35,350
- Professional?
- Mm-hm.

335
00:20:35,135 --> 00:20:36,603
- You sure?
- Listen,

336
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:39,506
you didn't see me practising
this morning.

337
00:20:40,607 --> 00:20:43,309
- I am a whisker away.
- All right.

338
00:20:44,144 --> 00:20:46,312
(Whispering) A whisker away.

339
00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:54,254
(Indistinct chatter)

340
00:20:58,658 --> 00:21:00,593
(Instrumental music building)

341
00:21:21,614 --> 00:21:22,649
(Birds chirping)

342
00:21:49,843 --> 00:21:52,145
(Melancholic instrumental music)

343
00:21:52,278 --> 00:21:53,713
(Chuckling)

344
00:22:00,887 --> 00:22:02,555
(People cheering)

345
00:22:02,689 --> 00:22:03,990
(Applause)

346
00:22:09,290 --> 00:22:13,700
(Announcer) 'Please welcome on the tee,
Maurice g flitcroft.'

347
00:22:18,338 --> 00:22:19,339
(music stops)

348
00:22:20,573 --> 00:22:22,308
You all right down there, old boy?

349
00:22:23,910 --> 00:22:25,445
Oh, yes.

350
00:22:26,790 --> 00:22:27,470
Hello, gents.

351
00:22:27,180 --> 00:22:30,216
Are you in the right place,
old chap?

352
00:22:30,884 --> 00:22:35,422
Yes, I'm here to join the club.
And I see you're a three ball.

353
00:22:35,555 --> 00:22:39,826
If you care to make it a four,
I'm available. Happy to join.

354
00:22:39,926 --> 00:22:42,629
Ugh, we're, um...
We're waiting for someone.

355
00:22:42,762 --> 00:22:44,464
Yes. George.

356
00:22:45,598 --> 00:22:47,200
George green.

357
00:22:50,570 --> 00:22:53,139
Actually,
thanks for the offer, gents,

358
00:22:53,273 --> 00:22:55,842
but, uh, on second thought,

359
00:22:55,975 --> 00:22:59,679
I think I'd prefer to play on my own today,
I hope you don't mind.

360
00:23:00,613 --> 00:23:02,282
Maurice flitcroft.

361
00:23:10,924 --> 00:23:12,258
Good luck, gents.

362
00:23:13,259 --> 00:23:14,361
(Quietly) Tossers.

363
00:23:15,261 --> 00:23:16,563
Flippin' people.

364
00:23:18,198 --> 00:23:19,199
Snobs.

365
00:23:20,567 --> 00:23:22,102
- Bloody...
- Excuse me, sir!

366
00:23:22,235 --> 00:23:27,640
Hello, there. Allow me to introduce myself.
I'm Bruce atkins, the steward of the club.

367
00:23:27,774 --> 00:23:29,743
Oh, hello, Bruce. I...

368
00:23:31,244 --> 00:23:32,579
I'm Maurice.

369
00:23:32,679 --> 00:23:35,148
How may I help you today, Maurice?

370
00:23:35,281 --> 00:23:37,150
I'm here to join the club, please.

371
00:23:38,510 --> 00:23:39,520
I see.

372
00:23:40,220 --> 00:23:44,157
That's fine. But there is a procedure
to get entry to the club.

373
00:23:44,257 --> 00:23:45,725
- Procedure?
- Yes.

374
00:23:45,859 --> 00:23:48,595
You must be recommended
by a committee member.

375
00:23:48,728 --> 00:23:50,630
You must play with two members

376
00:23:50,196 --> 00:23:53,133
to ascertain your level of skill,
etiquette, etc.

377
00:23:53,266 --> 00:23:56,403
Your application will be forwarded
to the members committee,

378
00:23:56,536 --> 00:24:00,730
whereupon, if accepted,
you'll be placed on the waiting list.

379
00:24:00,173 --> 00:24:02,742
- How long's the waiting list?
- Two years.

380
00:24:02,842 --> 00:24:04,277
- That's no good.
- Really?

381
00:24:04,411 --> 00:24:07,981
- No, I'm playing in the British open.
- The British open?

382
00:24:08,548 --> 00:24:11,510
So, I'll just play a round now.

383
00:24:11,718 --> 00:24:14,854
- Very well. That'll be five pounds.
- Five pounds?

384
00:24:14,988 --> 00:24:18,358
And you'd need to buy
some regulation golf shoes.

385
00:24:18,491 --> 00:24:20,927
- We don't allow work boots.
- How much are the shoes?

386
00:24:21,610 --> 00:24:24,297
Ten pounds. With the green fee,
that makes a round 15.

387
00:24:24,431 --> 00:24:26,633
Do you have 15 pounds, Maurice?

388
00:24:43,817 --> 00:24:46,619
(Whispering) Here he is.
Maurice g flitcroft.

389
00:24:54,561 --> 00:24:57,430
Only requires par for victory.

390
00:24:59,232 --> 00:25:02,102
Hey! Get off the golf course!

391
00:25:02,702 --> 00:25:04,804
What you doing? Hey!

392
00:25:05,939 --> 00:25:08,141
Oh! You cheeky sod!

393
00:25:08,274 --> 00:25:10,310
Oh, f... I've left me balls.

394
00:25:11,578 --> 00:25:12,946
Are you deaf?

395
00:25:14,814 --> 00:25:15,882
- Tosser!
- Go on!

396
00:25:17,500 --> 00:25:18,885
- Hands in your pockets.
- (Jean) Maurice?

397
00:25:19,190 --> 00:25:20,587
Yeah, it's not bad, is it?

398
00:25:21,721 --> 00:25:25,892
Bloody hell. I thought golf
was supposed to be relaxing, love.

399
00:25:26,260 --> 00:25:27,660
- So did I.
- What's happened?

400
00:25:27,761 --> 00:25:31,310
Oh. Uh... I'm giving up
on the open, son.

401
00:25:31,131 --> 00:25:33,600
- Oh. No. No, you're not.
- I am, love.

402
00:25:33,733 --> 00:25:36,936
I said you're not.
Not until you've opened this. Go on.

403
00:25:37,700 --> 00:25:38,638
J“ like dancing

404
00:25:38,772 --> 00:25:41,700
j“ I feel like dancing, ooh

405
00:25:41,141 --> 00:25:43,843
j“ dancing, ooh, dance the night away j“

406
00:25:43,977 --> 00:25:46,780
j“ I feel like dancing, ooh, dancing j“

407
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,182
j“ ah-ah-ah-ah j“

408
00:25:50,150 --> 00:25:52,819
j“ quarter to four in the morning j“

409
00:25:54,854 --> 00:25:57,357
j“ I ain't feeling
tired, no, no, no... j“j“

410
00:25:57,490 --> 00:26:00,260
so, I said: "Listen, television is
the only way to keep up with the Americans.

411
00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:01,928
Prestige comes to
nothing if you can't see it."

412
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:03,963
- What did they say?
- (Knocking)

413
00:26:04,464 --> 00:26:06,266
Excuse me, mr MacKenzie, sir.

414
00:26:07,670 --> 00:26:09,736
Yes, Jenny! Again!
What can I do for you?

415
00:26:09,869 --> 00:26:13,173
Sorry, sir. I just want
to show you this application.

416
00:26:14,274 --> 00:26:16,176
I'm not sure what to do with it.

417
00:26:17,344 --> 00:26:20,280
Oh, good lord.
Well, he's ticked professional, so...

418
00:26:20,380 --> 00:26:23,950
- I just wondered whether it's real.
- Whether what's real?

419
00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:25,885
Whether he really is a professional.

420
00:26:26,190 --> 00:26:29,890
Why would someone say they're
a professional when they're not?

421
00:26:29,723 --> 00:26:32,580
Well... to get into the open.

422
00:26:32,926 --> 00:26:36,529
I don't think anyone's gonna be
stupid enough to do that, m'dear.

423
00:26:36,629 --> 00:26:39,265
No, that would be
very stupid indeed.

424
00:26:39,933 --> 00:26:41,901
J“ doo-doo-doo-doo doob-doob-doob j“

425
00:26:42,469 --> 00:26:44,504
j“ doo-doo-doo-doo doob-doob-doob... j“j“

426
00:26:45,438 --> 00:26:46,439
I'm in.

427
00:26:47,407 --> 00:26:50,610
I best get cliff to get me
some new golf shoes.

428
00:26:53,780 --> 00:26:54,781
(Song stops)

429
00:26:57,484 --> 00:26:59,786
(Phone ringing)

430
00:27:01,755 --> 00:27:04,324
(J“ the foundations:
"Build me up buttercup" j“)

431
00:27:11,731 --> 00:27:14,340
Practice is the road to perfection.

432
00:27:16,469 --> 00:27:19,339
- J“ why do you build me up j“
- j“ build me up j“

433
00:27:19,472 --> 00:27:20,940
j“ buttercup, baby j“

434
00:27:21,740 --> 00:27:23,900
- j“ just to let me down j“
- j“ let me down j“

435
00:27:23,143 --> 00:27:25,145
j“ and mess me around... j“j“

436
00:27:27,347 --> 00:27:31,170
flippin' heck.
Can't see a flippin' thing.

437
00:27:31,618 --> 00:27:33,219
- J“ ineed you j“
- j“ ineed you j“

438
00:27:33,353 --> 00:27:35,221
j“ more than anyone, darling... j“j“

439
00:27:35,355 --> 00:27:38,658
- go.
- J“ you know that I have from the start

440
00:27:39,225 --> 00:27:40,894
- j“ so, build me up j“
- j“ build me up j“

441
00:27:40,994 --> 00:27:42,620
j“ buttercup j“

442
00:27:42,195 --> 00:27:43,863
j“ don't break my heart j“

443
00:27:46,199 --> 00:27:49,469
j“ "I'll be over at ten"
you told me time and again j“

444
00:27:49,602 --> 00:27:50,704
j“ but you're late j“

445
00:27:51,504 --> 00:27:53,506
- j“ I wait around and then... j“
- fore!

446
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:56,443
J“ I went to the door
I can't take any more... j“j“

447
00:27:56,576 --> 00:27:59,813
hey! That was a good one! I think.

448
00:27:59,946 --> 00:28:01,147
J“ hey, hey, heyj“

449
00:28:01,281 --> 00:28:03,483
j“ baby, baby, try to find... j“j“

450
00:28:03,616 --> 00:28:04,718
Mike.

451
00:28:08,555 --> 00:28:11,224
- Dad, w-what you doing here?
- Hello, son.

452
00:28:11,358 --> 00:28:12,892
This your new office, is it?

453
00:28:13,260 --> 00:28:14,394
- Yeah.
- Give us a look.

454
00:28:14,527 --> 00:28:16,896
It's not a great time.
We got some big deals going down.

455
00:28:17,300 --> 00:28:18,798
Oh, big deals?

456
00:28:19,432 --> 00:28:21,701
- Want a ciggy?
- No, no, you're ok.

457
00:28:21,801 --> 00:28:25,739
Son, I might, um,
might need a couple of days off,

458
00:28:25,839 --> 00:28:27,173
next Thursday, Friday.

459
00:28:27,307 --> 00:28:29,843
- Can you swing it?
- I'll see what I can do.

460
00:28:29,976 --> 00:28:33,613
I think I might've found meself
a new job.

461
00:28:33,713 --> 00:28:35,782
- Like you said.
- Great, dad.

462
00:28:35,882 --> 00:28:39,285
Mm. Yes, it is great.
Quite exciting, actually.

463
00:28:39,386 --> 00:28:42,922
I'm entering the British open,
you know. The golf thing.

464
00:28:43,823 --> 00:28:47,827
- Gonna go for it, I'm pretty good.
- I've got to go, but that's good.

465
00:28:47,927 --> 00:28:50,397
All right. It's good to have
yoursuppofl, son.

466
00:28:50,530 --> 00:28:52,320
Go on, get in there.

467
00:28:52,132 --> 00:28:54,367
- Ok, I'll see you later.
- All right.

468
00:28:54,467 --> 00:28:55,902
Ah, Mike.

469
00:28:56,360 --> 00:28:58,405
Hi, nice to meet ya. Mike flitcroft.

470
00:28:58,505 --> 00:28:59,773
- Be fine.
- It's not gonna fit.

471
00:28:59,839 --> 00:29:01,341
- Oh, yeah.
- Gene?

472
00:29:01,474 --> 00:29:03,843
Yeah, it's, like, aluminium,
so it'll bend.

473
00:29:04,911 --> 00:29:06,813
- Bloody hell! Very nice!
- Shit!

474
00:29:06,946 --> 00:29:10,160
- Lovely.
- It's all right, it's fine. Can you help?

475
00:29:10,150 --> 00:29:11,685
- Well done.
- Can you help?

476
00:29:11,818 --> 00:29:14,187
- You ready, lads?
- Yeah, fine. All good.

477
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:16,656
Yeah, ready.
Just putting it in the...

478
00:29:16,756 --> 00:29:18,910
No, no, I'll do it.

479
00:29:18,224 --> 00:29:20,527
- Come here.
- That's all fine. Here ya are.

480
00:29:20,660 --> 00:29:22,280
- Yeah.
- Look at that.

481
00:29:23,229 --> 00:29:25,310
Just remember,

482
00:29:25,131 --> 00:29:29,369
know whatever happens,
no one can say you didn't try.

483
00:29:29,469 --> 00:29:31,271
(Slow piano music)

484
00:29:31,404 --> 00:29:33,173
- You got your sandwiches?
- Sandwiches.

485
00:29:33,306 --> 00:29:35,342
Uh-huh. Good.

486
00:29:35,475 --> 00:29:36,943
- Made plenty.
- Thanks.

487
00:29:37,770 --> 00:29:39,145
- I got it.
- Don't eat them all on the journey.

488
00:29:39,279 --> 00:29:40,647
- No.
- Oh, no, no.

489
00:29:40,780 --> 00:29:41,781
Come here, you.

490
00:29:42,549 --> 00:29:43,550
Good luck.

491
00:29:44,170 --> 00:29:45,118
I love you.

492
00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:53,693
- Come on, come on with.
- No, put me down.

493
00:29:55,729 --> 00:29:58,631
Come on, you'll be late. Get going.

494
00:29:58,732 --> 00:30:00,367
I know, I love you too.

495
00:30:03,103 --> 00:30:06,740
I'm gonna get some claret for that jug,
on the mantelpiece.

496
00:30:06,873 --> 00:30:08,775
- Do it.
- I'll get onto it.

497
00:30:09,876 --> 00:30:11,177
- Bye, love.
- Love ya.

498
00:30:11,277 --> 00:30:12,579
(Jean) Love you more.

499
00:30:21,154 --> 00:30:25,825
(Tony) 'The sun is shining this morning
at formby golf club on merseyside,

500
00:30:25,959 --> 00:30:27,794
where, in a few minutes time,

501
00:30:27,927 --> 00:30:31,965
the new stars of the golfing world
will take their first steps

502
00:30:32,650 --> 00:30:34,634
to claiming the historic claret jug

503
00:30:34,734 --> 00:30:37,671
and a cheque
for ten thousand pounds.'

504
00:30:38,204 --> 00:30:40,400
'join us here in about an hour

505
00:30:40,173 --> 00:30:43,943
for what promises to be
a tournament to remember.'

506
00:30:55,522 --> 00:30:58,758
Oh, you practise on the beach 'n all?

507
00:30:59,325 --> 00:31:01,327
Uh, sorry, my English...

508
00:31:01,461 --> 00:31:03,530
Oh, no. Um...

509
00:31:03,663 --> 00:31:06,966
- Gpracticas en la playa también?
- Si.

510
00:31:07,670 --> 00:31:10,704
(In Spanish)

511
00:31:10,837 --> 00:31:13,707
Yeah, the banker. Si.

512
00:31:14,407 --> 00:31:17,944
Um, Maurice. Maurice flitcroft.

513
00:31:18,780 --> 00:31:20,313
- Severiano ballesteros.
- You what?

514
00:31:20,447 --> 00:31:21,948
(In Spanish)

515
00:31:22,820 --> 00:31:23,883
Oh, si. Seve, seve. Hm.

516
00:31:23,983 --> 00:31:25,418
(In Spanish)

517
00:31:26,286 --> 00:31:28,321
(In Spanish)

518
00:31:40,700 --> 00:31:41,701
- Si. — uh— huh.

519
00:31:49,576 --> 00:31:51,211
(In English)
You know what I mean?

520
00:31:52,145 --> 00:31:54,647
(In Spanish)

521
00:32:09,896 --> 00:32:11,498
(In English) Watch out, seve.

522
00:32:12,399 --> 00:32:14,234
(In Spanish)

523
00:32:26,546 --> 00:32:27,881
(Indistinct chatter)

524
00:32:36,656 --> 00:32:37,857
Thank you.

525
00:32:42,962 --> 00:32:45,732
Righto, son. What's first up?

526
00:32:45,865 --> 00:32:47,467
Uh, first hole.

527
00:32:47,567 --> 00:32:49,903
Um, 460 yards.

528
00:32:50,403 --> 00:32:52,205
Trouble left and right.

529
00:32:54,207 --> 00:32:56,509
Four hundred and sixty yards.
Parfive.

530
00:32:56,609 --> 00:32:58,178
- Par four.
- Par four.

531
00:33:00,613 --> 00:33:04,317
Take a driver, get it up there.
Give us a chance going at the green.

532
00:33:04,451 --> 00:33:08,355
No. I've been a bit wild, you know,
just of late, with me driver.

533
00:33:08,488 --> 00:33:12,125
I'll take... I'll take me 4-wood.
I never miss with that.

534
00:33:12,258 --> 00:33:14,127
Yeah. Ok.

535
00:33:21,801 --> 00:33:25,271
- Sorry, dad. There's no 4-wood.
- You what?

536
00:33:25,405 --> 00:33:27,607
I must've left the 4-wood
in the car.

537
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:34,881
- It's ****ing James' fault!
- No, all right, son. It's all right.

538
00:33:35,815 --> 00:33:38,918
I'll take me driver.
Mind your language on the course.

539
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:40,653
Yeah, sorry, dad.

540
00:33:41,788 --> 00:33:44,924
'Ladies and gentlemen,
this is game number 14.'

541
00:33:45,492 --> 00:33:47,427
'please welcome on the tee,

542
00:33:47,527 --> 00:33:50,830
representing pontypool golf club,
wales,

543
00:33:50,964 --> 00:33:53,700
and sponsored by conways,

544
00:33:53,833 --> 00:33:55,301
Jim Howard.'

545
00:33:57,300 --> 00:33:58,400
(applause)

546
00:34:11,510 --> 00:34:12,419
****ing 'ell!

547
00:34:14,487 --> 00:34:16,656
'Please welcome on the tee,

548
00:34:16,790 --> 00:34:19,926
representing la boudin golf club,
France,

549
00:34:20,260 --> 00:34:22,796
and sponsored by mcgranger sport,

550
00:34:22,896 --> 00:34:24,330
Laurent lambert.'

551
00:34:34,774 --> 00:34:36,420
(Spectator) Oh.

552
00:34:41,810 --> 00:34:43,950
'And finally,
please welcome on the tee,

553
00:34:44,840 --> 00:34:47,587
representing cumbria
county golf club, england,

554
00:34:47,687 --> 00:34:49,823
and sponsored by

555
00:34:49,956 --> 00:34:52,425
vickers shipyard,

556
00:34:52,525 --> 00:34:54,194
Maurice g flitcroft.'

557
00:35:22,322 --> 00:35:24,240
(Tense music)

558
00:35:26,926 --> 00:35:28,561
(Wind howling)

559
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,468
(Uplifting music)

560
00:35:49,490 --> 00:35:50,500
(Thud)

561
00:35:50,884 --> 00:35:51,885
(Music stops)

562
00:35:55,855 --> 00:35:58,258
(People whispering indistinctly)

563
00:36:12,872 --> 00:36:15,375
Right, son. What we got left?

564
00:36:15,875 --> 00:36:17,911
Uh, well...

565
00:36:18,478 --> 00:36:20,647
Hole's 460 and...

566
00:36:21,448 --> 00:36:23,750
What we gone? Uh, eight.

567
00:36:24,417 --> 00:36:26,920
So, 452 to the pin.

568
00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:29,689
Right. I'll take...
I'll take me three iron.

569
00:36:29,823 --> 00:36:31,591
I'll just go for position.

570
00:36:32,125 --> 00:36:33,126
Yeah.

571
00:36:49,175 --> 00:36:51,311
- Great shot, dad.
- It's all right.

572
00:36:51,945 --> 00:36:53,246
Yeah, that'll do.

573
00:36:53,380 --> 00:36:55,548
(J“ Louis prima:
"When you're smiling" j“)

574
00:36:56,783 --> 00:36:58,685
- J“ when you're smiling j“
- j“ when you're smiling j“

575
00:36:58,718 --> 00:37:00,854
- j“ when you're smiling j“
- j“ when you're smiling j“

576
00:37:00,920 --> 00:37:02,489
j“ and the whole world j“

577
00:37:02,622 --> 00:37:04,457
- j“ smiles with you j“
- j“ smiles with you j“

578
00:37:04,491 --> 00:37:06,860
- j“ and when you're laughing j“
- j“ when you're laughing j“

579
00:37:06,860 --> 00:37:09,229
- j“ oh, you're laughing j“
- j“ oh, you're laughing j“

580
00:37:09,362 --> 00:37:11,998
j“ mmmm
when the sun comes shining through j“

581
00:37:12,132 --> 00:37:13,133
- j“ shining through

582
00:37:13,233 --> 00:37:15,635
- j“ when you're crying j“
- j“ when you're crying j“

583
00:37:15,735 --> 00:37:17,504
- j“ you bring on the rain j“
- j“ bring on the rain j“

584
00:37:17,537 --> 00:37:19,472
- j“ stop your sighing j“
- j“ stop your sighing j“

585
00:37:19,506 --> 00:37:21,307
- j“ oh, to be happy again j“
- j“ happy again j“

586
00:37:21,341 --> 00:37:23,309
- j“ when you're smiling j“
- j“ when you're smiling j“

587
00:37:23,343 --> 00:37:25,311
- j“ keep on smiling j“
- j“ keep on smiling j“

588
00:37:25,445 --> 00:37:29,490
j“ and the whole world
smiles with you j“

589
00:37:29,149 --> 00:37:29,983
j“ let's go now j“

590
00:37:30,116 --> 00:37:31,117
j“ let's go j“

591
00:37:32,819 --> 00:37:34,154
j“ come on... j“j“

592
00:37:37,524 --> 00:37:39,192
gene. Concentrate.

593
00:37:39,325 --> 00:37:41,161
- Yeah, I was.
- Flippin' heck.

594
00:37:42,796 --> 00:37:44,631
(Grunts) You see?

595
00:37:44,731 --> 00:37:47,133
(Song continues, instrumental)

596
00:37:51,738 --> 00:37:52,739
(Cheering)

597
00:37:54,374 --> 00:37:55,375
(Applause)

598
00:37:56,242 --> 00:37:57,243
(Indistinct)

599
00:38:01,915 --> 00:38:03,783
(Spectators) Go on! Go on!

600
00:38:20,660 --> 00:38:21,670
All right?

601
00:38:25,372 --> 00:38:29,876
Tony, it's Lloyd. Listen, I want everything
you can find on a Maurice flitcroft.

602
00:38:31,378 --> 00:38:35,115
F-I-i-t-c-r-o-f-t.

603
00:38:36,490 --> 00:38:37,830
Flitcroft.

604
00:38:40,153 --> 00:38:41,254
(Song stops)

605
00:38:41,354 --> 00:38:43,857
Half-time scores, please, gents.
Jim Howard?

606
00:38:43,990 --> 00:38:46,593
- Thirty-three. Round about.
- Thank you.

607
00:38:46,693 --> 00:38:49,620
- Laurent lambert?
- (John) Thirty-two.

608
00:38:49,195 --> 00:38:53,733
- (Maurice) Halfway there, gene.
- Thirty-two. And Maurice flitcroft?

609
00:38:53,867 --> 00:38:55,680
Sixty-three.

610
00:38:55,869 --> 00:38:59,339
- Sorry, say that again.
- Sixty-three.

611
00:39:05,478 --> 00:39:06,479
Good god.

612
00:39:10,483 --> 00:39:13,453
We, in Scotland,
invented the game of golf.

613
00:39:13,586 --> 00:39:16,156
The British open is the oldest tournament
in the world.

614
00:39:16,289 --> 00:39:20,260
The most respected and prestigious.

615
00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:23,129
And we must do all we can
to burnish that reputation.

616
00:39:23,229 --> 00:39:27,801
Say that to your dad the next time
he spouts any of that nonsense, ok?

617
00:39:27,901 --> 00:39:30,403
Thank you for your time. Now...

618
00:39:31,271 --> 00:39:34,700
Maurice flitcroft
has hit a sixty-three.

619
00:39:34,607 --> 00:39:35,875
Sixty-three?

620
00:39:36,443 --> 00:39:39,245
- How the hell did that happen?
- I've no idea.

621
00:39:39,379 --> 00:39:41,214
- Do the press know?
- Not yet.

622
00:39:41,915 --> 00:39:44,250
- Let's bloody keep it that way.
- Yeah.

623
00:39:45,919 --> 00:39:47,454
(Spectators) Oh.

624
00:39:52,292 --> 00:39:56,830
(Maurice) I must say,
that was a bit disappointing.

625
00:39:58,565 --> 00:40:00,166
Mr flitcroft!

626
00:40:00,300 --> 00:40:03,690
Keith MacKenzie, secretary of the
royal and ancient golf society.

627
00:40:03,203 --> 00:40:06,172
- May I have a word with you, please?
- Oh, course.

628
00:40:06,272 --> 00:40:07,407
Uh, here.

629
00:40:07,540 --> 00:40:09,376
It's an honour to meet you, sir.

630
00:40:09,509 --> 00:40:13,380
I'm very much enjoying the, uh,
you know, the championship.

631
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:15,615
Good. Good. So are we. Thank you.

632
00:40:15,749 --> 00:40:19,252
However, my colleague and I
were just wondering if you, uh,

633
00:40:19,386 --> 00:40:21,921
might've had your fill of it,
so to speak.

634
00:40:22,220 --> 00:40:22,822
I'm sorry?

635
00:40:22,956 --> 00:40:26,126
We were just wondering
if you'd like to retire.

636
00:40:26,259 --> 00:40:27,961
I'm not... I'm not...

637
00:40:28,610 --> 00:40:32,232
I'm not sure I follow ya.
I'm sorry. I must get to the next tee.

638
00:40:32,365 --> 00:40:36,202
All right. Let me speak plainly.
We can all see you don't belong here,

639
00:40:36,336 --> 00:40:39,506
so why don't you just
quietly gather up your things

640
00:40:39,606 --> 00:40:41,875
and let's not cause a scene,
shall we?

641
00:40:43,430 --> 00:40:44,978
You know, there... there's one...

642
00:40:45,111 --> 00:40:48,782
One thing I can promise you,
uh, mr MacKenzie,

643
00:40:48,915 --> 00:40:53,787
and... and that is no, no,
I certainly will not be retiring.

644
00:40:54,587 --> 00:40:58,591
My swing's just about to,
you know, click in.

645
00:40:59,793 --> 00:41:02,829
Uh, so, if you'll excuse me,
I must get on.

646
00:41:03,396 --> 00:41:06,660
(J“ Billy Preston:
"Nothing from nothing" j“)

647
00:41:06,199 --> 00:41:09,669
I mustjust thank a mrs t holness
of liphook golf club

648
00:41:09,803 --> 00:41:13,773
for a most wonderful cake,
a Victoria sponge no less.

649
00:41:13,907 --> 00:41:17,243
Now, my producer's just handed me
a piece of paper.

650
00:41:17,377 --> 00:41:19,446
Either I need a new pair of glasses

651
00:41:19,579 --> 00:41:23,650
or there's something quite extraordinary
happening on the course.

652
00:41:23,783 --> 00:41:26,353
That's nothing.
Have you seen the new Audi 80?

653
00:41:26,486 --> 00:41:27,821
- Bloody hell.
- Bloody hell.

654
00:41:27,954 --> 00:41:29,956
- I mean she is a beauty.
- Gorgeous.

655
00:41:30,900 --> 00:41:34,127
'He's played the first nine holes
in a phenomenal 63 shots.'

656
00:41:34,260 --> 00:41:36,290
beautiful lines. Clear lines.

657
00:41:36,162 --> 00:41:39,165
I don't bloody believe it.
Boys, look who it is.

658
00:41:40,300 --> 00:41:41,301
Who is it?

659
00:41:41,401 --> 00:41:44,838
Some plonker who said
he was playing in the British open.

660
00:41:44,938 --> 00:41:46,940
- I thought he was having me on.
- Good lord.

661
00:41:47,730 --> 00:41:50,777
'His card reads:
Seven, nine, eight, ten.'

662
00:41:50,910 --> 00:41:54,381
'there's a 12 with a question Mark.
Not sure what that means.'

663
00:41:54,481 --> 00:41:55,882
'oh, there's a six.'

664
00:41:57,617 --> 00:42:00,620
'the authorities will be wondering
how this happened.'

665
00:42:02,220 --> 00:42:04,157
'it says here his name is

666
00:42:05,191 --> 00:42:07,327
Maurice g flit... '

667
00:42:08,461 --> 00:42:10,363
oi, what's got into you flitcroft?

668
00:42:10,497 --> 00:42:12,966
Sorry, I was just trying
to get a better signal.

669
00:42:13,660 --> 00:42:15,935
Ah! The snug, come on!

670
00:42:17,203 --> 00:42:19,172
(Song continues)

671
00:42:19,272 --> 00:42:22,709
'Clarke leads by one from Roberts
on this opening morning.'

672
00:42:22,842 --> 00:42:26,446
'now then, back to our intrepid hacker
on the 13th.'

673
00:42:30,950 --> 00:42:34,854
(chuckling) 'He's celebrating
like he just holed for a birdie.'

674
00:42:34,988 --> 00:42:36,690
'but that was for a ten.'

675
00:42:37,357 --> 00:42:40,427
'that makes for an astonishing plus 38.'

676
00:42:40,527 --> 00:42:42,362
'I've never seen that before.'

677
00:42:44,998 --> 00:42:46,866
'now, back to the man
of the moment.'

678
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:51,705
'he's lost two balls on this hole,
which makes this one a nine and...'

679
00:42:53,390 --> 00:42:56,176
(chuckling) 'That's in!
And the crowd go wild.'

680
00:42:56,276 --> 00:42:57,770
(ringing)

681
00:42:57,210 --> 00:43:00,313
Tony, what've you got for me?
A crane driver?

682
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:03,490
Where from?

683
00:43:04,484 --> 00:43:05,919
Have you got an address?

684
00:43:08,822 --> 00:43:10,657
J“ nothin' from nothin'
leaves nothin'... j“j“

685
00:43:10,790 --> 00:43:12,759
(laughing)

686
00:43:12,859 --> 00:43:15,295
- Stop, we got it.
- Stop moving, flitcroft.

687
00:43:16,290 --> 00:43:20,330
'Oh, dear. That's his fourth shot,
he's still not out of the bunker.'

688
00:43:20,166 --> 00:43:23,300
'at this rate,
he's gonna end up in Australia.'

689
00:43:23,103 --> 00:43:27,273
'now, either someone's slipped
some Spanish liquor into my tea

690
00:43:27,407 --> 00:43:30,430
or his caddie is wearing
basketball pumps.'

691
00:43:30,610 --> 00:43:34,314
- 'they are a pair of Bobby dazzlers.'
- How do I know him?

692
00:43:34,914 --> 00:43:38,952
'It says here he's representing
cumbria county golf club in barrow.'

693
00:43:39,850 --> 00:43:43,523
'well, if he's the best they can do,
I wouldn't like to see the rest of them.'

694
00:43:43,656 --> 00:43:48,628
'and he has a sponsor, believe it or not.
Vickers shipyard in barrow-in-furness.'

695
00:43:48,728 --> 00:43:52,650
'i wouldn't like to sail on their boats
if he's building them.'

696
00:43:52,198 --> 00:43:56,302
'the authorities aren't going to like it,
but I can tell you,

697
00:43:56,403 --> 00:44:00,940
the name of Maurice flitcroft
will go down in history.'

698
00:44:02,409 --> 00:44:04,770
(songs stops)

699
00:44:04,210 --> 00:44:07,580
- It's quite a common name.
- (Hopkins) Hm.

700
00:44:07,714 --> 00:44:09,749
(Slow instrumental music)

701
00:44:18,758 --> 00:44:20,427
What time is it? Huh?

702
00:44:21,995 --> 00:44:23,830
Putain. There.

703
00:44:25,650 --> 00:44:27,133
(Music building)

704
00:44:35,750 --> 00:44:37,210
Qu'est—ce que c'est tout ca?

705
00:44:39,312 --> 00:44:43,450
- Look at this crowd, dad!
- Yeah. Must be doing something right.

706
00:44:50,423 --> 00:44:52,492
Yeah, let... let's, uh...

707
00:44:52,625 --> 00:44:55,362
You know, give 'em
something to cheer about.

708
00:44:56,129 --> 00:44:57,530
Four iron.

709
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:02,402
(Sighs)

710
00:45:05,572 --> 00:45:07,941
(Intriguing music building slowly)

711
00:45:23,857 --> 00:45:25,458
(Tense music)

712
00:45:40,106 --> 00:45:41,107
Where is it?

713
00:45:46,479 --> 00:45:48,214
Next to the flippin' pin, dad!

714
00:46:05,465 --> 00:46:06,966
(Cheering and applause)

715
00:46:13,907 --> 00:46:16,843
'Well, this fellow
is the story of the day.'

716
00:46:16,943 --> 00:46:18,878
'Maurice flitcroft,

717
00:46:18,978 --> 00:46:20,714
on the last for a birdie.'

718
00:46:21,981 --> 00:46:24,500
'it'll be a surprise
if this goes in.'

719
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:29,155
'wait until you hear the roar

720
00:46:29,923 --> 00:46:31,291
if it does.'

721
00:46:32,992 --> 00:46:33,993
(silence)

722
00:46:48,675 --> 00:46:52,312
'Oh, and it misses
on the right-hand side.'

723
00:46:52,445 --> 00:46:54,214
'it was a good effort.'

724
00:47:01,788 --> 00:47:05,258
'This is for, uh, I think 119.'

725
00:47:10,630 --> 00:47:14,234
'Ooh, that was not
a positive stroke.'

726
00:47:14,367 --> 00:47:17,370
(j“ Walter Murphy:
"Could it be the music" j“)

727
00:47:22,676 --> 00:47:25,245
'It's getting
a little bit grizzly now.'

728
00:47:27,247 --> 00:47:28,815
'hopefully he'll put this in.'

729
00:47:29,949 --> 00:47:30,950
'and he does!'

730
00:47:31,818 --> 00:47:34,654
'that's 121 .'

731
00:47:34,788 --> 00:47:36,122
'remarkable.'

732
00:47:36,256 --> 00:47:37,991
j“ could it be the music, oh, yeah j“

733
00:47:38,124 --> 00:47:40,193
j“ it thrills me to my soul j“

734
00:47:40,326 --> 00:47:41,895
j“ could it be the music... j“j“

735
00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:43,730
'oh, double trouble.'

736
00:47:43,863 --> 00:47:45,732
j“ that makes me rock and roll j“

737
00:47:45,865 --> 00:47:47,901
j“ maybe it's the music
oh, yeah... j“j“

738
00:47:48,340 --> 00:47:52,772
'i believe that's called the caterpillar,
that move, eh?'

739
00:47:52,906 --> 00:47:54,574
'seen my grandson do that.'

740
00:47:56,760 --> 00:47:58,311
'not on a golf course,
I must admit.'

741
00:47:59,212 --> 00:48:03,717
'I'm afraid with a score like that
he won't be coming back tomorrow.'

742
00:48:03,817 --> 00:48:08,755
'but whether you like it or not,
the day belongs to Maurice flitcroft.'

743
00:48:17,731 --> 00:48:20,660
- Hello?
- Hello. Can I help you at all?

744
00:48:20,734 --> 00:48:24,400
Oh, sorry. I'm looking
for Maurice flitcroft's house.

745
00:48:24,104 --> 00:48:25,271
Oh, well, you found it.

746
00:48:25,405 --> 00:48:28,575
I'm... I'm Jean flitcroft.
Maurice is my husband.

747
00:48:28,708 --> 00:48:30,944
Maurice. Lloyd Donovan,
"the sun" newspaper.

748
00:48:31,770 --> 00:48:34,314
Wondered if you had any comments
on what your husband did at the open?

749
00:48:34,447 --> 00:48:35,915
Oh, how'd he do?

750
00:48:36,490 --> 00:48:40,420
He shot 121.
It's the highest score in major history.

751
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:43,230
Oh, that's good. That mean he's won?

752
00:48:45,759 --> 00:48:47,327
A high score is bad.

753
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:52,198
Is it? Oh, well. Never mind,
you've got to start somewhere, ain't you?

754
00:48:52,832 --> 00:48:56,360
Um, about to pop the kettle on,
do you want a cup of tea?

755
00:48:56,169 --> 00:48:58,271
- You want a biscuit?
- Thank you very much.

756
00:48:58,405 --> 00:49:00,373
(All) Maurice! Maurice!

757
00:49:02,242 --> 00:49:05,745
How does it feel to have shot
the worst round in the history of the open?

758
00:49:05,879 --> 00:49:09,816
I don't feel the score was a fair
reflection on the play, actually.

759
00:49:10,316 --> 00:49:13,860
What score would be
a fair reflection, Maurice?

760
00:49:13,186 --> 00:49:16,690
That's hard to tell,
it's the first round I've ever played.

761
00:49:17,657 --> 00:49:20,460
What do you put
your bad score down to?

762
00:49:20,593 --> 00:49:23,630
Well, I'd say the main problem
with my game today

763
00:49:23,730 --> 00:49:26,399
was that I left me 4-wood
in the car.

764
00:49:26,533 --> 00:49:28,334
I don't mean to make excuses,

765
00:49:28,468 --> 00:49:31,571
but I'm deadly accurate
with me 4-wood. Deadly.

766
00:49:33,730 --> 00:49:36,376
What made you enter the open?
Was it a joke?

767
00:49:37,210 --> 00:49:38,745
Well, I...

768
00:49:39,946 --> 00:49:41,114
No, no.

769
00:49:41,247 --> 00:49:42,816
No, it's no joke.

770
00:49:42,949 --> 00:49:44,884
Well, I... no.

771
00:49:45,485 --> 00:49:48,880
Are you gonna try again
next year, Maurice?

772
00:49:49,589 --> 00:49:52,859
Uh, yes. Yes, uh...
I'll be back next year.

773
00:49:52,992 --> 00:49:56,229
I just need to practise
a little bit more, and well...

774
00:49:56,363 --> 00:49:58,465
Practice is the road to perfection.

775
00:49:58,565 --> 00:50:01,000
So, if you'll excuse me, uh...

776
00:50:01,134 --> 00:50:03,503
Uh... I'll see you next year, chaps!

777
00:50:03,603 --> 00:50:06,172
- Thank you, Maurice.
- Righto, Maurice.

778
00:50:11,711 --> 00:50:14,280
- You showed 'em, didn't you?
- (Clattering)

779
00:50:14,414 --> 00:50:17,751
Quiet when you go in, lads.
Your mum must've gone to bed.

780
00:50:17,884 --> 00:50:19,520
Yeah, sorry.

781
00:50:19,919 --> 00:50:21,921
Oh, um, still...

782
00:50:22,220 --> 00:50:25,592
Look, at least you tried.
That's the main thing, in't it, dad?

783
00:50:25,692 --> 00:50:28,128
Oh, yeah, that's right.
I enjoyed it.

784
00:50:28,228 --> 00:50:29,996
- Yeah, good.
- Enjoyed it, I did.

785
00:50:30,130 --> 00:50:32,565
- All right. I'll just...
- You go in.

786
00:50:32,699 --> 00:50:34,968
- I'll just get me things.
- Ok.

787
00:50:51,551 --> 00:50:53,987
(Train passing by in distance)

788
00:50:59,626 --> 00:51:01,294
(Dog barking in distance)

789
00:51:21,470 --> 00:51:22,480
(Door creaking)

790
00:51:22,982 --> 00:51:25,251
- Surprise!
- Oh!

791
00:51:27,854 --> 00:51:30,924
Flippin' heck,
you nearly gave me a heart attack!

792
00:51:31,791 --> 00:51:34,270
- You didn't tell me!
- I didn't know.

793
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:36,896
- You didn't know? Willie!
- All right, mol.

794
00:51:38,198 --> 00:51:39,199
Cliff.

795
00:51:39,332 --> 00:51:40,867
- Great, mol.
- Oh, look!

796
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:42,802
- They did that.
- Champion!

797
00:51:42,902 --> 00:51:45,380
"Congratulations, Maurice.
Our champion".

798
00:51:45,171 --> 00:51:47,507
- Well...
- (Cliff) And you are.

799
00:51:47,607 --> 00:51:49,509
(Jean) You did so well.

800
00:51:51,811 --> 00:51:55,480
I, uh, I wasn't quite as good
as I thought I was.

801
00:51:55,148 --> 00:51:57,417
Hey, just your first time, love.

802
00:51:57,550 --> 00:52:00,453
- (Willie) You'll show 'em next time!
- Well...

803
00:52:00,587 --> 00:52:04,124
Oh, next time, yeah.
Did the lads tell you about the 18th?

804
00:52:04,257 --> 00:52:07,560
- I birdied it, nearly, right on the green.
- (Cliff) We saw it!

805
00:52:07,694 --> 00:52:10,163
- You saw it?
- On the telly, in the shipyard.

806
00:52:10,296 --> 00:52:11,297
- On the telly?
- Yeah.

807
00:52:22,375 --> 00:52:24,770
- — Quiche?
- (Cliff) Do you like it?

808
00:52:24,210 --> 00:52:25,812
I don't mind it, quiche.

809
00:52:26,813 --> 00:52:29,482
(Maurice) What are those?
(Cliff) Twirls.

810
00:52:29,616 --> 00:52:30,950
- Twirls?
- Twirls.

811
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:32,218
(Cheering)

812
00:52:33,860 --> 00:52:34,870
Get off me!

813
00:52:34,954 --> 00:52:38,425
- (Jean) You all right, love?
- You coming for a snout?

814
00:52:38,525 --> 00:52:39,793
No, you're all right.

815
00:52:39,926 --> 00:52:43,663
(Maurice) Oh, did you see?
(Michael) Yeah, I did.

816
00:52:43,797 --> 00:52:46,833
Ah. Did you see the 18th,
where I nearly birdied it?

817
00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:49,669
- Ha!
- I must've missed that bit.

818
00:52:49,803 --> 00:52:52,439
Well, I know the standard
wasn't ideal, but...

819
00:52:52,572 --> 00:52:56,343
Not ideal?
Well, what were you thinking, dad?

820
00:52:57,377 --> 00:53:01,481
You've never played golf before.
I've never heard you mention golf.

821
00:53:01,614 --> 00:53:02,415
But I told you.

822
00:53:02,549 --> 00:53:07,187
You've got to take these things up
at age six, you can take 'em up at 46!

823
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:08,121
Well, who says?

824
00:53:08,254 --> 00:53:10,523
Well, the world says. Ok?

825
00:53:10,657 --> 00:53:13,960
Reality says.
Well, look what happened.

826
00:53:14,694 --> 00:53:17,300
What?
Well, I were a bit nervous, but...

827
00:53:17,163 --> 00:53:19,399
(Michael)
Well, you had every right to be.

828
00:53:20,300 --> 00:53:25,500
- Everyone at the yard's gone hopping mad.
- (Jean) What's he done to them?

829
00:53:25,105 --> 00:53:27,207
This disparages the shipyard.

830
00:53:27,340 --> 00:53:30,710
- (Gene) What's "disparaged"?
- Have you swallowed a ****ing dictionary?

831
00:53:30,844 --> 00:53:33,380
Ok, you two.
Can you get out, please?

832
00:53:36,490 --> 00:53:37,500
Nice.

833
00:53:38,818 --> 00:53:39,953
(Maurice) Well...

834
00:53:43,289 --> 00:53:45,425
I'm sorry I embarrassed you, son.

835
00:53:47,460 --> 00:53:49,529
It's not me I'm worried about, dad.

836
00:53:50,630 --> 00:53:51,631
It's you.

837
00:53:53,867 --> 00:53:56,770
The redundancies are gonna
be decided this week.

838
00:53:58,104 --> 00:53:59,939
Hopkins watched it as well.

839
00:54:00,774 --> 00:54:02,442
He weren't best pleased.

840
00:54:03,843 --> 00:54:05,111
Sorry, dad.

841
00:54:06,312 --> 00:54:08,114
(Slow song playing in the room)

842
00:54:13,520 --> 00:54:14,521
(Opens door)

843
00:54:15,188 --> 00:54:17,691
- (Gene) Bye, Mike.
- Thanks for stopping by.

844
00:54:17,824 --> 00:54:19,325
- You off?
- (Closes door)

845
00:54:26,366 --> 00:54:29,569
- So sorry. Drink?
- (Guest) Yeah, I'll have one.

846
00:54:29,703 --> 00:54:34,700
(Jean) Lovely, get another round in.
(Guest) Yeah, nice. Lovely.

847
00:54:34,107 --> 00:54:35,942
(Indistinct chatter)

848
00:54:40,800 --> 00:54:42,480
(Guests laughing and chatting)

849
00:54:45,510 --> 00:54:49,622
Love, if that's what he decides, it
gives you more time to practise, don't it?

850
00:54:51,925 --> 00:54:52,926
Hey?

851
00:54:54,327 --> 00:54:55,328
(Door opens)

852
00:54:55,362 --> 00:54:56,730
- Oh, love.
- Hiya.

853
00:54:56,863 --> 00:54:58,832
There's someone
I want you to meet.

854
00:54:58,965 --> 00:55:03,200
Hi, Maurice. I'm Lloyd Donovan.
"Sun" newspaper.

855
00:55:03,603 --> 00:55:06,940
Listen, uh, can I, uh,
get an exclusive?

856
00:55:07,540 --> 00:55:09,420
- Exclusive?
- Yeah.

857
00:55:09,709 --> 00:55:12,779
Aye. For a fee, you know.

858
00:55:12,912 --> 00:55:15,482
Oh, of course, yeah.
Name your price.

859
00:55:15,615 --> 00:55:17,751
(J“ abba: "Money, money, money" j“)

860
00:55:21,187 --> 00:55:25,525
J“ I work all night, I work all day
to pay the bills I have to pay j“

861
00:55:26,526 --> 00:55:28,128
j“ ain't it sad? J“

862
00:55:29,290 --> 00:55:33,733
j“ and still there never seems to be
a single penny left for me j“

863
00:55:34,334 --> 00:55:36,690
j“ that's too bad j“

864
00:55:37,337 --> 00:55:38,905
j“ in my dreams j“

865
00:55:39,390 --> 00:55:41,241
j“ I have a plan j“

866
00:55:41,374 --> 00:55:44,778
j“ if I got me a wealthy man j“

867
00:55:44,911 --> 00:55:49,249
j“ I wouldn't have to work at all
I'd fool around and have a ball... j“j“

868
00:55:49,382 --> 00:55:53,620
I want him barred! I want him barred
from every club in the country!

869
00:55:55,789 --> 00:55:58,158
J“ money, money, money j“

870
00:55:58,291 --> 00:55:59,626
j“ must be funny j“

871
00:56:00,326 --> 00:56:02,562
j“ in a rich man's world j“

872
00:56:03,830 --> 00:56:05,498
j“ money, money, money... j“j“

873
00:56:07,233 --> 00:56:08,468
Bruce.

874
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:13,907
Maurice. I'd like to join, please.
I got the money.

875
00:56:15,108 --> 00:56:17,510
And... I got the shoes.

876
00:56:19,979 --> 00:56:23,249
I appreciate the effort you've made,
mr flitcroft,

877
00:56:23,383 --> 00:56:25,952
but I'm sorry, I can't accept this.

878
00:56:26,860 --> 00:56:29,756
- Why not?
- We have orders from mr MacKenzie.

879
00:56:30,323 --> 00:56:32,692
Mr MacKenzie?
Can I see that, please?

880
00:56:33,860 --> 00:56:36,996
(Bruce) Golf club membership
is for amateurs only.

881
00:56:37,130 --> 00:56:40,734
As I entered the open as a professional,
I can't join a club?

882
00:56:40,867 --> 00:56:44,204
- Correct.
- He accepts that I'm professional.

883
00:56:44,337 --> 00:56:47,107
Professionals can play
on any course in the country.

884
00:56:47,240 --> 00:56:48,541
Yes.

885
00:56:49,776 --> 00:56:51,111
Great!

886
00:56:51,244 --> 00:56:54,381
Simply show them your
professional golf association certificate

887
00:56:54,481 --> 00:56:56,583
and away you go.

888
00:56:58,418 --> 00:57:00,253
But I don't have one, Bruce.

889
00:57:01,154 --> 00:57:05,258
There's no chance of me even getting one
unless I belong to a club.

890
00:57:06,526 --> 00:57:07,627
Like I say...

891
00:57:08,628 --> 00:57:09,662
I'm sorry.

892
00:57:13,233 --> 00:57:17,103
I consider this action a gross betrayal
of me rights as a human being.

893
00:57:17,237 --> 00:57:18,672
Me human rights.

894
00:57:18,772 --> 00:57:22,909
Is the British open, not by definition,
open to everyone?

895
00:57:24,100 --> 00:57:25,211
Furthermore...

896
00:57:27,614 --> 00:57:30,984
The British open
is indeed open to all golfers,

897
00:57:31,117 --> 00:57:36,156
providing they have achieved a standard
fit for competing at a professional level.

898
00:57:36,856 --> 00:57:40,593
My mother plays golf. Would I
want her eligible for the British open?

899
00:57:40,694 --> 00:57:42,629
No. I certainly would not.

900
00:57:42,729 --> 00:57:47,330
Of course, I wouldn't want your mother
to be eligible for the men's British open,

901
00:57:47,167 --> 00:57:50,203
but I would hope that you would
consider her eligible

902
00:57:50,337 --> 00:57:52,238
for the women's British open.

903
00:57:52,372 --> 00:57:55,800
- Don't you think?
- Good point.

904
00:57:55,108 --> 00:57:59,946
Ought I to add ***ism
to your list of crimes, mr MacKenzie?

905
00:58:01,381 --> 00:58:03,216
(Jean) I like that a lot.

906
00:58:03,316 --> 00:58:06,953
I now consider the tone of your letters
to be unbecoming to my office

907
00:58:07,870 --> 00:58:09,923
and will, therefore,
cease replying to them

908
00:58:10,230 --> 00:58:12,325
as of this correspondence.

909
00:58:32,312 --> 00:58:36,750
"Mr MacKenzie feels he has said
all he has to say on this matter."

910
00:58:36,883 --> 00:58:38,952
"Apart from to remind you

911
00:58:39,850 --> 00:58:42,856
that any unlawful entering of a golf club
is trespassing."

912
00:58:42,989 --> 00:58:43,990
Flippin' heck.

913
00:58:44,791 --> 00:58:47,160
- You all right?
- Yeah. Don't worry.

914
00:58:47,293 --> 00:58:49,863
"He trusts this brings
this matter to a close."

915
00:58:49,996 --> 00:58:51,865
Oh, you'll show 'em yet, love.

916
00:58:53,566 --> 00:58:56,200
Just need to make them listen,
that's all.

917
00:59:09,749 --> 00:59:12,318
(Cheerful jingle)

918
00:59:13,119 --> 00:59:15,622
'We've come outside
to the studio car park

919
00:59:15,755 --> 00:59:18,491
to meet the man
who shot a world record

920
00:59:18,625 --> 00:59:21,561
of 121 at the British open.'

921
00:59:21,695 --> 00:59:24,564
'he is the world's
worst professional golfer.'

922
00:59:24,698 --> 00:59:26,633
'sorry. I don't agree with that.'

923
00:59:26,733 --> 00:59:30,170
'I'm not the worst golfer
and I'm willing to prove it.'

924
00:59:30,270 --> 00:59:32,500
'(chuckles) Ok, great.'

925
00:59:32,105 --> 00:59:34,908
'we have set up
a little golf course here.'

926
00:59:35,410 --> 00:59:37,777
'it's not a golf course,
it's a putting green.'

927
00:59:38,378 --> 00:59:40,780
'great. It's exciting, isn't it?'

928
00:59:44,217 --> 00:59:46,486
'oh, now, that was close.'

929
00:59:46,619 --> 00:59:49,489
'that was a practice shot,
get the pace of the green.'

930
00:59:49,622 --> 00:59:52,292
'yes, well,
it has been raining out here,

931
00:59:52,425 --> 00:59:54,694
so it could be a bit damp,
couldn't it?'

932
00:59:55,695 --> 00:59:56,730
'oh!'

933
00:59:56,863 --> 01:00:01,134
'now, you feel that you should be
let back into the open, is that right?'

934
01:00:01,234 --> 01:00:05,271
'yes, an open championship,
you know, should be open to everyone.'

935
01:00:05,405 --> 01:00:09,876
'uh, like the fa cup, you know, give the...
Give the little teams a chance.'

936
01:00:10,610 --> 01:00:12,412
(Rory) 'Oh! Now, bad luck.'

937
01:00:12,545 --> 01:00:15,115
'uh, I think this ground is...
Is sloping.'

938
01:00:15,715 --> 01:00:20,320
'well, uh, everybody does say that
this car park is a bit lopsided, so...'

939
01:00:20,453 --> 01:00:21,521
(chuckling in the background)

940
01:00:21,521 --> 01:00:23,823
'I'd best hand back to the studio.'

941
01:00:23,957 --> 01:00:27,930
'thank you to the fantastic
Maurice flitcroft.'

942
01:00:27,193 --> 01:00:28,962
'the world's worst golfer.'

943
01:00:29,620 --> 01:00:31,531
'no, I'm not
the world's worst golfer.'

944
01:00:32,165 --> 01:00:34,300
'i don't agree with that.'

945
01:00:38,171 --> 01:00:40,540
(chuckling) Good shot, Maurice.

946
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:45,578
(Cliff) Hey, it's really coming, innit?
(Maurice) It's coming.

947
01:00:46,413 --> 01:00:48,915
Practice is the road to perfection,
you know?

948
01:00:52,986 --> 01:00:53,987
Oh!

949
01:00:56,990 --> 01:00:58,910
(Door opens)

950
01:01:00,260 --> 01:01:01,461
In here, love.

951
01:01:01,561 --> 01:01:02,662
(Door closes)

952
01:01:04,831 --> 01:01:07,200
- Have I missed 'em?
- No, nothing yet.

953
01:01:07,667 --> 01:01:08,802
How was practice?

954
01:01:08,902 --> 01:01:11,771
Was great.
Getting better all the time.

955
01:01:11,905 --> 01:01:13,390
(Ringing)

956
01:01:14,574 --> 01:01:16,176
- Boys?
- We did it!

957
01:01:16,276 --> 01:01:19,279
We bloody did it!
National champions!

958
01:01:19,412 --> 01:01:22,820
We're gonna make history.
The world final's next!

959
01:01:22,215 --> 01:01:23,416
Oh, well done, lads.

960
01:01:23,550 --> 01:01:26,419
Oh. Well done.
Where are the finals, love?

961
01:01:26,519 --> 01:01:27,921
****ing France!

962
01:01:28,210 --> 01:01:29,322
You go have fun.

963
01:01:30,230 --> 01:01:31,758
- I love you.
- (Hangs up)

964
01:01:33,260 --> 01:01:35,795
They're gone. There.
Shall we celebrate too?

965
01:01:35,895 --> 01:01:39,232
- Got some babycham in the fridge.
- We should celebrate.

966
01:01:39,366 --> 01:01:42,369
- I'll have a cup of tea, please, love.
- All right, love.

967
01:01:42,502 --> 01:01:46,840
Have to do some more practice later
to work on me putting.

968
01:01:53,413 --> 01:01:54,414
Love...

969
01:01:56,883 --> 01:01:58,718
Don't be so hard on yourself.

970
01:02:00,487 --> 01:02:02,689
There was a slope in that car park.

971
01:02:03,156 --> 01:02:05,759
I could see it from here
on the television.

972
01:02:09,662 --> 01:02:11,498
I don't know what happened.

973
01:02:12,320 --> 01:02:14,340
I got a bit nervous, maybe.

974
01:02:15,235 --> 01:02:19,500
- Love?
- Got a bit of me... of me migraine.

975
01:02:20,340 --> 01:02:22,208
- I don't know.
- (Tuts) Oh.

976
01:02:23,343 --> 01:02:24,310
Hey.

977
01:02:27,147 --> 01:02:30,483
How do you think
that mr Jack Nicholson

978
01:02:30,617 --> 01:02:33,486
would've done
taking up the golf at fifty?

979
01:02:33,620 --> 01:02:34,621
Jack nicklaus?

980
01:02:34,654 --> 01:02:36,990
Yeah. No coaching.

981
01:02:37,123 --> 01:02:39,759
- Not one lesson. Eh?
- Hm.

982
01:02:39,859 --> 01:02:45,650
And having to practise on a beach with
a bloody retriever yapping at his ankles.

983
01:02:45,198 --> 01:02:48,501
- You think he'd have done any better?
- It's a good point.

984
01:02:48,635 --> 01:02:51,371
But they still won't let me...

985
01:02:52,500 --> 01:02:53,940
Let me join, will they? So...

986
01:02:54,941 --> 01:02:57,944
- There's no point in talking about it.
- All right.

987
01:02:58,780 --> 01:02:59,746
(Maurice) There's no point.

988
01:03:01,981 --> 01:03:02,982
All right.

989
01:03:13,626 --> 01:03:14,627
Well...

990
01:03:17,530 --> 01:03:19,999
They might not let you in,
but, uh...

991
01:03:21,000 --> 01:03:23,870
What about if you were to enter
as someone else?

992
01:03:24,671 --> 01:03:26,773
- Someone else?
- Yeah.

993
01:03:27,407 --> 01:03:29,542
Dashing frenchman perhaps?

994
01:03:31,111 --> 01:03:32,112
Bonjour.

995
01:03:39,119 --> 01:03:41,688
Jean, you're a genius.

996
01:03:46,626 --> 01:03:47,827
Tres chic.

997
01:03:48,862 --> 01:03:50,230
Bonjour.

998
01:03:51,297 --> 01:03:55,702
(Announcer) 'Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome on the tee, from Paris, France,

999
01:03:55,835 --> 01:03:56,836
Gerard hoppy.'

1000
01:04:00,173 --> 01:04:03,576
(j“ Walter Murphy:
"A fifth of Beethoven" j“)

1001
01:04:03,710 --> 01:04:05,879
Ok, you've got this.

1002
01:04:05,979 --> 01:04:08,810
Your practice has been sensational.

1003
01:04:08,214 --> 01:04:12,218
No one'll guess it's you,
so just relax and bring it home, Maurice.

1004
01:04:12,318 --> 01:04:15,588
- Again, don't call me Maurice.
- Ah, shit, sorry, mol.

1005
01:04:15,689 --> 01:04:18,425
Or mol, I'm Gerard, Gerard hoppy.

1006
01:04:18,525 --> 01:04:19,526
Gotcha.

1007
01:04:19,659 --> 01:04:20,960
(Music continues)

1008
01:04:32,872 --> 01:04:36,876
'That's a nice opening drive
from the frenchman, Gerard hoppy.'

1009
01:04:37,100 --> 01:04:40,113
- 'unusual swing, but, uh, effective.'
- Yes!

1010
01:04:40,246 --> 01:04:41,448
Good shot, Maurice.

1011
01:04:42,215 --> 01:04:44,884
- Gerard.
- Gerard. Shit, sorry.

1012
01:04:44,984 --> 01:04:47,354
- Shot, Gerard!
- Merci beaucoup.

1013
01:04:55,228 --> 01:04:56,296
(Music continues)

1014
01:04:58,865 --> 01:04:59,866
Yeah.

1015
01:05:01,868 --> 01:05:05,338
And that's a steady start
for the frenchman, Gerard hoppy.

1016
01:05:05,438 --> 01:05:07,574
He's parred the first two holes.

1017
01:05:07,707 --> 01:05:10,510
I must confess
I don't know much about this fellow,

1018
01:05:10,610 --> 01:05:13,480
but he's a natty dresser,
I'll give him that.

1019
01:05:18,651 --> 01:05:20,620
'This for a bogey
for the frenchman.'

1020
01:05:21,421 --> 01:05:24,657
'and it's in! My goodness,
he rattled that one in.'

1021
01:05:29,462 --> 01:05:32,365
who is this Gerard hoppy?

1022
01:05:32,499 --> 01:05:35,335
- I can't find him in the notes.
- I've never heard of him either.

1023
01:05:35,468 --> 01:05:37,170
Merci, merci.

1024
01:05:37,270 --> 01:05:39,606
- (Keith) Keep an eye on him.
- On y va.

1025
01:05:41,241 --> 01:05:42,542
Vive la France.

1026
01:05:42,676 --> 01:05:43,677
(Music stops)

1027
01:05:44,611 --> 01:05:49,549
'And now, as the breeze gets up,
we join Gerard hoppy on the tenth tee.'

1028
01:05:50,500 --> 01:05:51,484
'still going well.'

1029
01:05:51,618 --> 01:05:53,286
'still going well

1030
01:05:53,820 --> 01:05:56,790
in his first qualifier.'

1031
01:06:01,361 --> 01:06:02,629
'oh! And that's...'

1032
01:06:02,729 --> 01:06:06,660
'he's tweaked that left
and it's in the bunker.'

1033
01:06:07,567 --> 01:06:10,103
right, it's just a bunker.

1034
01:06:10,236 --> 01:06:13,673
Remember your practice!
You've done this loads of times, mol!

1035
01:06:14,941 --> 01:06:16,760
What?

1036
01:06:16,209 --> 01:06:18,440
Oh, shit! Sorry, mol!

1037
01:06:18,178 --> 01:06:19,145
I mean Gerard!

1038
01:06:19,279 --> 01:06:21,114
Gerard! Shit!

1039
01:06:43,503 --> 01:06:45,105
(Heavy breathing)

1040
01:06:49,376 --> 01:06:51,440
(Crowd, disappointed groans)

1041
01:07:03,690 --> 01:07:05,358
(Cliff) What's up, Maurice?

1042
01:07:06,192 --> 01:07:07,193
Cliff...

1043
01:07:07,560 --> 01:07:11,231
(In French)

1044
01:07:14,234 --> 01:07:16,669
(In English)
Please, stop calling me Maurice.

1045
01:07:16,770 --> 01:07:19,939
- Shit, sorry, mate.
- It's MacKenzie, he's spotted us.

1046
01:07:20,730 --> 01:07:22,542
- Where?
- He's up there. No, behind us.

1047
01:07:22,676 --> 01:07:24,911
Behind. Don't look back.
Don't look back.

1048
01:07:25,412 --> 01:07:26,880
Mr flitcroft.

1049
01:07:26,980 --> 01:07:29,382
Uh, pardon, monsieur.

1050
01:07:29,482 --> 01:07:32,786
Je m'appel/e Gerard hoppy.

1051
01:07:32,919 --> 01:07:35,188
Uh, merci beaucoup.

1052
01:07:35,321 --> 01:07:37,624
- I know it's you.
- Stay back, pal!

1053
01:07:37,757 --> 01:07:40,660
- This doesn't concern you.
- Come with us, please.

1054
01:07:40,794 --> 01:07:42,896
Pardon. Je ne comprends pas.

1055
01:07:43,290 --> 01:07:44,864
Je m'appel/e Gerard hoppy.

1056
01:07:44,998 --> 01:07:47,867
J'habite... Paris, France.
Just going to the tee.

1057
01:07:48,100 --> 01:07:50,937
Mr flitcroft,
you look ridiculous in that wig!

1058
01:07:51,710 --> 01:07:54,674
It's not a crime to wear a wig, is it?
He's got one, look!

1059
01:07:56,876 --> 01:07:58,712
- (Cliff) Come on.
- That's it!

1060
01:07:58,812 --> 01:07:59,713
(Cliff) Here we go.

1061
01:07:59,813 --> 01:08:01,548
This is Keith MacKenzie.

1062
01:08:01,648 --> 01:08:05,151
I need police assistance on the
tenth fairway. Two trespassers.

1063
01:08:05,285 --> 01:08:08,880
Police? You didn't tell me
this was illegal, Maurice!

1064
01:08:08,188 --> 01:08:11,458
- The game's up, Maurice.
- Oh, cliff, you berk.

1065
01:08:11,925 --> 01:08:14,327
Right. Come on! Out of the way!

1066
01:08:15,280 --> 01:08:16,730
Maurice! Come on!

1067
01:08:17,697 --> 01:08:20,500
- What are you doing?
- Come with me! Come on!

1068
01:08:20,633 --> 01:08:24,700
I've got two trespassers coming your way!
Arrest them both!

1069
01:08:24,204 --> 01:08:26,706
Repeat! I repeat! Arrest them both!

1070
01:08:26,840 --> 01:08:30,777
- Two trespassers, one with a red shirt.
- What you doing, cliff?

1071
01:08:31,244 --> 01:08:32,579
Get in! Hop in!

1072
01:08:33,580 --> 01:08:34,781
Hop in!

1073
01:08:35,248 --> 01:08:38,985
(Tony) 'I'm hearing there's been
an altercation with an official.'

1074
01:08:39,119 --> 01:08:44,900
'and Gerard hoppy, the frenchman,
I believe, has commandeered a vehicle.'

1075
01:08:46,292 --> 01:08:47,560
j“ it is the night... j“j“

1076
01:08:47,694 --> 01:08:51,564
'don't adjust the television,
this isn't the "keystone cops".'

1077
01:08:51,698 --> 01:08:53,633
'this is actually happening.'

1078
01:08:54,167 --> 01:08:55,668
oh, no.

1079
01:08:55,802 --> 01:08:56,803
J“ ride like the wind... j“j“

1080
01:08:56,836 --> 01:08:59,906
what are we doing, cliff?
We're just making it worse.

1081
01:09:00,707 --> 01:09:03,109
I don't know, mol,
but you'll be all right.

1082
01:09:03,243 --> 01:09:05,578
I stole the clothes.
They can't get you for that.

1083
01:09:05,712 --> 01:09:07,414
You what? No, you...

1084
01:09:07,547 --> 01:09:10,383
You got 'em from your mate,
down the market.

1085
01:09:10,483 --> 01:09:13,653
There is no mate down the market.
I nicked them.

1086
01:09:14,454 --> 01:09:17,257
Whoa! Wait, wait! Oh! Oh!

1087
01:09:17,357 --> 01:09:19,526
J“ I was born the son of a lawless j“j“

1088
01:09:19,659 --> 01:09:21,294
(song stops abruptly)

1089
01:09:22,620 --> 01:09:24,497
- Shit.
- Flippin' heck.

1090
01:09:24,631 --> 01:09:26,466
(Cliff) Jesus.
(Maurice) Get out.

1091
01:09:26,566 --> 01:09:28,168
I can't get caught, mol.

1092
01:09:29,736 --> 01:09:33,106
Just"
it's just a few clothes, cliff.

1093
01:09:33,239 --> 01:09:35,800
No, you don't understand.

1094
01:09:35,108 --> 01:09:39,713
I done some really bad things.
I can't go back inside, not now.

1095
01:09:39,813 --> 01:09:43,950
They'll throw away the key.
Jesus Christ, what am I gonna do, mol?

1096
01:09:45,652 --> 01:09:46,853
Run.

1097
01:09:46,986 --> 01:09:49,122
Just go before I change me mind.

1098
01:09:49,622 --> 01:09:52,125
I never killed anyone, though.
I swear.

1099
01:09:52,258 --> 01:09:54,527
Don't believe
everything they say, mol.

1100
01:09:54,661 --> 01:09:56,663
Gerard! I mean Gerard! Sorry!

1101
01:09:57,630 --> 01:10:00,166
- Tossers!
- Mr flitcroft, stop!

1102
01:10:01,801 --> 01:10:05,105
J“ accused and tired
and told to hang j“

1103
01:10:05,238 --> 01:10:08,942
j“ I was nowhere in sight
when the church bells rang j“

1104
01:10:09,750 --> 01:10:12,445
j“ never was the kind
to do as I was told j“j“

1105
01:10:12,579 --> 01:10:14,470
(song stops abruptly)

1106
01:10:17,650 --> 01:10:21,154
(Tony) 'Now, I am hearing news
that mr Gerard hoppy

1107
01:10:21,287 --> 01:10:24,190
is not in fact Gerard hoppy.'

1108
01:10:24,324 --> 01:10:26,993
'I'm hearing it's Maurice flitcroft.'

1109
01:10:27,127 --> 01:10:29,396
'the so-ca/ied phantom of the open.'

1110
01:10:31,164 --> 01:10:32,365
(knocking on door)

1111
01:10:34,401 --> 01:10:37,537
- You wanted to see me, mr Hopkins?
- Now, Mike.

1112
01:10:37,671 --> 01:10:39,205
I want to show you something.

1113
01:10:39,339 --> 01:10:43,430
'This time Maurice flitcroft,
a crane driver from barrow,

1114
01:10:43,176 --> 01:10:44,310
was arrested by police

1115
01:10:44,444 --> 01:10:47,213
and is being held
at southport police station.'

1116
01:10:47,313 --> 01:10:50,383
'the ball has been set
at a thousand pounds.'

1117
01:10:51,151 --> 01:10:52,752
'in other news... '

1118
01:10:53,987 --> 01:10:57,424
we're in the middle
of trying to secure the trident deal.

1119
01:10:58,158 --> 01:11:01,461
And we got your dad
taking the piss out of me.

1120
01:11:01,561 --> 01:11:04,964
- I wouldn't take it personally, sir.
- Gerard hoppy?

1121
01:11:06,299 --> 01:11:08,134
I can see what you mean, but...

1122
01:11:08,234 --> 01:11:11,400
We provide you
with a nice life here, Mike.

1123
01:11:12,238 --> 01:11:16,276
Nice clothes, nice house, nice car.

1124
01:11:17,510 --> 01:11:20,246
Not bad for a little *******
from bankside, eh?

1125
01:11:21,915 --> 01:11:24,217
You gotta decide, Mike.

1126
01:11:25,850 --> 01:11:29,522
You're either his sort or you're our sort.
You can't be both.

1127
01:11:31,491 --> 01:11:33,126
(Slow melancholic music)

1128
01:11:38,465 --> 01:11:40,567
(Indistinct chatter on car radio)

1129
01:11:48,375 --> 01:11:49,376
(Radio stops)

1130
01:11:53,790 --> 01:11:54,647
Mike! Mike!

1131
01:11:54,781 --> 01:11:57,283
- No need to shout, Maurice.
- No, I'm not.

1132
01:11:57,417 --> 01:11:58,785
Eh, thanks, son.

1133
01:11:58,918 --> 01:12:01,521
- I'll pay you back.
- Don't worry about it.

1134
01:12:01,654 --> 01:12:03,890
(Seagulls trilling)

1135
01:12:04,491 --> 01:12:05,592
Road sweeper.

1136
01:12:06,526 --> 01:12:07,827
Is that it?

1137
01:12:07,961 --> 01:12:12,399
Your options are limited.
Partly because of the, uh, incident.

1138
01:12:13,633 --> 01:12:15,335
I'm sorry.

1139
01:12:19,572 --> 01:12:22,375
Those are unusual.
You grow 'em yourself?

1140
01:12:22,942 --> 01:12:26,546
No, I picked 'em on the way in.
I shouldn't, really, but...

1141
01:12:26,646 --> 01:12:28,648
No, you should.

1142
01:12:28,782 --> 01:12:33,186
Pick all the flowers you can
while you're still young.

1143
01:12:34,487 --> 01:12:35,955
(Slow melancholic music)

1144
01:13:03,483 --> 01:13:06,786
Oi, Maurice!
Get back on that course!

1145
01:13:06,920 --> 01:13:09,890
Don't let the *******s get you down!

1146
01:13:16,996 --> 01:13:18,164
(Music continues)

1147
01:13:19,650 --> 01:13:21,401
(News) 'Middle*** beat
champions Yorkshire.'

1148
01:13:21,534 --> 01:13:25,171
'there were wins for somerset, surrey,
lancashire and warwickshire,

1149
01:13:25,271 --> 01:13:29,900
who meet at the Benson and hedges final,
on Saturday.'

1150
01:13:29,109 --> 01:13:30,210
'and finally,

1151
01:13:30,343 --> 01:13:34,381
Joe thornbush has entered for this week's
British open golf championship.'

1152
01:13:34,481 --> 01:13:38,585
'but the organisers believe mr thornbush
may really be Maurice flitcroft,

1153
01:13:38,718 --> 01:13:43,356
the crane driver from barrow
who scored 121 in a qualifying round.'

1154
01:13:43,490 --> 01:13:46,993
'championship secretary have kept
a sample of mr flitcroft's handwriting

1155
01:13:47,127 --> 01:13:49,229
just in case he applied again.'

1156
01:13:49,362 --> 01:13:51,310
'that's the news this evening.'

1157
01:13:51,164 --> 01:13:53,466
hiya. Oh, smells nice.

1158
01:13:54,834 --> 01:13:57,270
Got another postcard
from the boys, look.

1159
01:14:02,409 --> 01:14:03,943
Look at that.

1160
01:14:04,770 --> 01:14:06,112
- Moch-bar.
- Moscow.

1161
01:14:06,246 --> 01:14:07,247
Moscow.

1162
01:14:08,148 --> 01:14:09,249
Look at that.

1163
01:14:12,552 --> 01:14:15,755
"Dancing round the globe,
drinking a lot of vodka".

1164
01:14:18,324 --> 01:14:19,325
Lovely.

1165
01:14:21,961 --> 01:14:22,996
Moscow!

1166
01:14:23,697 --> 01:14:26,232
Postmark was
from two months ago, mind.

1167
01:14:26,366 --> 01:14:28,340
- Two months ago?
- Mm-hm.

1168
01:14:29,135 --> 01:14:32,605
- What they been doing since then, I wonder?
- Don't know.

1169
01:14:34,507 --> 01:14:35,508
Great!

1170
01:14:37,510 --> 01:14:38,545
That's it then.

1171
01:14:42,582 --> 01:14:45,151
We really do enjoy our work here.

1172
01:14:45,285 --> 01:14:48,210
- We'll be building the brand for 15-20 years.
- (Gene, whistling) Michael! Oi!

1173
01:14:48,210 --> 01:14:49,220
Oi!

1174
01:14:49,923 --> 01:14:52,250
- Hey, up! Mr moustache!
- Who are they?

1175
01:14:52,158 --> 01:14:55,195
- They're just...
- Don't worry, we don't know them.

1176
01:14:55,328 --> 01:14:58,331
- If you could keep coming with us.
- Michael!

1177
01:14:58,465 --> 01:15:01,134
- Mike! Michael?
- Excuse us. Excuse us.

1178
01:15:02,335 --> 01:15:04,938
- Who are these people?
- They're my brothers.

1179
01:15:05,710 --> 01:15:07,874
- You're joking? Get rid of them.
- Yeah, I will.

1180
01:15:08,800 --> 01:15:10,844
- Make it back for the dinner.
- I'll get rid of 'em.

1181
01:15:10,944 --> 01:15:13,313
- Sorry, one second.
- (Hopkins chuckles)

1182
01:15:13,446 --> 01:15:17,584
Mike works at a homeless charity part time,
just a couple of escapees.

1183
01:15:17,717 --> 01:15:19,586
- I see.
- He'll be back in a minute.

1184
01:15:19,686 --> 01:15:22,288
- What you playing at?
- What are you doing here?

1185
01:15:23,656 --> 01:15:25,425
We went to the house
but there was nobody.

1186
01:15:25,525 --> 01:15:27,794
- Yeah, they had to move out.
- Move out?

1187
01:15:27,927 --> 01:15:29,629
- It's not been great.
- Can we crash with you?

1188
01:15:29,662 --> 01:15:31,664
- No.
- Where we supposed to stay?

1189
01:15:31,798 --> 01:15:34,834
- Come on, I'll show ya.
- We've nowhere to go.

1190
01:15:39,439 --> 01:15:41,241
(Indistinct chatter on radio)

1191
01:15:43,276 --> 01:15:44,411
(Knocking on door)

1192
01:15:50,417 --> 01:15:54,421
- It's the boys, Jean! Come in, lads!
- These are yours, I believe.

1193
01:15:54,521 --> 01:15:58,124
(Maurice) Blimey,
the whole family back together.

1194
01:15:58,258 --> 01:15:59,659
I'll put the heater on.

1195
01:16:01,528 --> 01:16:04,831
- (Jean) You wanna sit down? You all right?
- It's fine.

1196
01:16:04,964 --> 01:16:08,168
Well, what happened?
We thought you were on tour, loves.

1197
01:16:08,301 --> 01:16:10,236
- It got cancelled.
- (Maurice) Cancelled?

1198
01:16:10,370 --> 01:16:12,739
- (Gene) Crowds got less and less.
- No one turned up?

1199
01:16:12,872 --> 01:16:17,110
Yeah, it was like one minute
disco were alive, the next it were dead.

1200
01:16:17,243 --> 01:16:22,248
Well, that's just, you know,
circle of life sometimes, boys.

1201
01:16:27,420 --> 01:16:29,289
Is that all you've got to say?

1202
01:16:30,156 --> 01:16:32,859
(Jean) What do you expect us to say,
Michael?

1203
01:16:32,992 --> 01:16:34,561
Well, how about sorry?

1204
01:16:36,196 --> 01:16:37,664
For what?

1205
01:16:37,797 --> 01:16:40,133
You should have made them
get properjobs!

1206
01:16:40,233 --> 01:16:43,203
Well... they're living the dream.

1207
01:16:44,300 --> 01:16:47,874
- There's nowt wrong with that.
- It depends what the dream is.

1208
01:16:48,800 --> 01:16:49,542
They're world champions!

1209
01:16:49,676 --> 01:16:54,647
At what? Disco dancing? They may as well
be world champions at tiddlywinks.

1210
01:16:54,781 --> 01:16:57,884
Look at the state of 'em.
The fantastic flitcrofts?

1211
01:16:58,451 --> 01:17:00,320
The fantastic ****-ups more like.

1212
01:17:00,453 --> 01:17:05,125
(Maurice) They aimed for the stars.
(Michael) And now they're in the gutter.

1213
01:17:06,192 --> 01:17:11,640
Mike's right. If we'd had a different dad,
we'd have done better 'n all.

1214
01:17:11,197 --> 01:17:14,367
Reckon our dancing's about
as useful as your golf, dad.

1215
01:17:14,868 --> 01:17:16,302
(Jean, softly) Boys.

1216
01:17:16,403 --> 01:17:18,405
(Kettle starting to boil)

1217
01:17:30,984 --> 01:17:31,985
(Kettle stops)

1218
01:17:35,321 --> 01:17:39,259
(Jean) Maurice, what are you doing?
You all right? Love?

1219
01:17:43,296 --> 01:17:44,698
Love, where you going?

1220
01:17:46,299 --> 01:17:48,340
Just going out for a moment.

1221
01:17:51,104 --> 01:17:52,339
I'm all right.

1222
01:17:52,439 --> 01:17:53,440
(Opens door)

1223
01:17:57,577 --> 01:17:58,578
(Closes door)

1224
01:18:00,213 --> 01:18:01,548
(Thunder rumbling)

1225
01:18:05,719 --> 01:18:06,686
Right.

1226
01:18:08,621 --> 01:18:11,691
You go and apologise to your dad.
Now, please.

1227
01:18:12,992 --> 01:18:15,128
But he's not my dad, though, is he?

1228
01:18:17,864 --> 01:18:21,670
(Jean) How can you stand there
and say that...

1229
01:18:22,936 --> 01:18:25,572
- After all he's done for you?
- Hey, no.

1230
01:18:25,705 --> 01:18:30,343
Everything I've done, I've done meself.
He wanted me to be a flippin' astronaut!

1231
01:18:30,944 --> 01:18:32,712
He's made your life a misery.

1232
01:18:35,415 --> 01:18:36,416
Enough.

1233
01:18:41,521 --> 01:18:43,523
(Melancholic instrumental music)

1234
01:18:51,197 --> 01:18:53,199
(Jean) When I was 17...

1235
01:18:54,534 --> 01:18:55,702
I got, uh,

1236
01:18:56,669 --> 01:18:59,706
offered a job to join
a theatre company.

1237
01:19:00,940 --> 01:19:02,876
Seven pound fifty a week.

1238
01:19:06,212 --> 01:19:07,781
Dream come true.

1239
01:19:07,914 --> 01:19:09,983
Whole life set up for me.

1240
01:19:13,119 --> 01:19:14,254
What happened?

1241
01:19:15,689 --> 01:19:16,956
I got pregnant.

1242
01:19:19,459 --> 01:19:20,627
(Music continues)

1243
01:19:21,661 --> 01:19:25,565
I wanted to keep you, Michael,
no question in my mind about that.

1244
01:19:26,966 --> 01:19:28,368
But, um...

1245
01:19:29,502 --> 01:19:31,104
Nobody supported me.

1246
01:19:31,938 --> 01:19:34,607
Not my father, not my mother.

1247
01:19:35,575 --> 01:19:36,776
Not my friends.

1248
01:19:38,778 --> 01:19:41,748
I trained as a secretary
off my own back.

1249
01:19:41,881 --> 01:19:44,617
Set up the little theatre by myself.

1250
01:19:48,210 --> 01:19:50,357
I brought you up by myself.

1251
01:19:51,291 --> 01:19:52,292
Yeah.

1252
01:19:53,793 --> 01:19:57,364
Not a soul stood by my side
for a single second.

1253
01:20:00,834 --> 01:20:02,469
And then I met your father.

1254
01:20:02,569 --> 01:20:04,571
(Music building)

1255
01:20:21,521 --> 01:20:22,856
(Music slows down)

1256
01:20:22,989 --> 01:20:25,825
So, don't you tell me
he's made my life a misery.

1257
01:20:28,528 --> 01:20:30,630
He's made my life.

1258
01:20:31,231 --> 01:20:32,799
He's made all our lives.

1259
01:20:38,338 --> 01:20:39,339
Now...

1260
01:20:42,275 --> 01:20:43,877
I'm going out there...

1261
01:20:46,790 --> 01:20:47,614
To look for him.

1262
01:20:48,715 --> 01:20:51,885
And I suggest you come and help me.

1263
01:20:53,853 --> 01:20:55,922
I can't, mum, I've got a dinner.

1264
01:20:56,220 --> 01:21:00,260
Oh, ok, Michael. Well, never mind,
it's your life. Come on now, boys.

1265
01:21:05,198 --> 01:21:06,199
(Closes door)

1266
01:21:08,568 --> 01:21:10,300
(Wind blowing)

1267
01:21:16,409 --> 01:21:17,777
(Thunder rumbling)

1268
01:21:45,538 --> 01:21:47,707
(Slow melancholic music)

1269
01:23:06,853 --> 01:23:07,854
Maurice?

1270
01:23:08,922 --> 01:23:09,923
Maurice?

1271
01:23:12,459 --> 01:23:13,460
Jean?

1272
01:23:13,593 --> 01:23:15,528
Oh, you all right, Pam?

1273
01:23:15,662 --> 01:23:18,310
Hey, you've not seen Maurice,
have you?

1274
01:23:19,399 --> 01:23:22,335
But here,
I've got some post for you.

1275
01:23:22,469 --> 01:23:24,504
Oh. Thanks.

1276
01:23:25,380 --> 01:23:26,172
Be bills.

1277
01:23:33,580 --> 01:23:35,548
Postmark from america, look.

1278
01:23:43,156 --> 01:23:44,491
Willie, look at this.

1279
01:23:46,926 --> 01:23:49,562
Bloody hell.
Come on, we've gotta find him.

1280
01:23:50,530 --> 01:23:51,664
Thanks, Pam.

1281
01:23:52,132 --> 01:23:53,533
(Gene) Dad? (Jean) Maurice?

1282
01:23:53,666 --> 01:23:54,701
(James) Dad?

1283
01:23:55,568 --> 01:23:57,203
- Dad?
- (Willie) Maurice?

1284
01:23:58,104 --> 01:23:59,906
(Willie) Mol? (Jean) Maurice?

1285
01:24:00,707 --> 01:24:02,375
- (Willie) Mol?
- Dad? I

1286
01:24:04,978 --> 01:24:06,413
there he is.

1287
01:24:08,214 --> 01:24:12,452
(James) We're sorry, dad!
(Gene) We're really, really sorry!

1288
01:24:13,453 --> 01:24:16,856
Come down, love!
They didn't mean it! None of them!

1289
01:24:21,961 --> 01:24:23,563
They were right!

1290
01:24:25,365 --> 01:24:27,734
The world's not an oyster!

1291
01:24:28,735 --> 01:24:30,737
It's just a barnacle!

1292
01:24:32,339 --> 01:24:34,700
I see that now!

1293
01:24:35,508 --> 01:24:38,311
What are you talking about,
you bloody fool?

1294
01:24:39,790 --> 01:24:42,315
(Maurice) I raised your hopes
too high, lads!

1295
01:24:43,283 --> 01:24:44,484
I'm sorry.

1296
01:24:45,819 --> 01:24:49,189
I should've known
I would just let you down.

1297
01:24:50,256 --> 01:24:52,459
I wouldn't be so sure about that!

1298
01:24:52,992 --> 01:24:55,328
Why don't you come down
and read this?

1299
01:24:55,795 --> 01:24:58,640
(Jean) We've got a plane to catch!

1300
01:24:59,499 --> 01:25:01,868
(Terry) Dear mr flitcroft.
My name is Terry Moore

1301
01:25:02,100 --> 01:25:04,871
and I am writing to you
from grand rapids, Michigan.

1302
01:25:05,400 --> 01:25:08,740
You won't be aware of this, but,
for ten years now,

1303
01:25:08,208 --> 01:25:10,610
we've held
the Maurice flitcroft trophy

1304
01:25:10,744 --> 01:25:12,212
in your honour.

1305
01:25:12,312 --> 01:25:15,480
J“ you say this guy j“

1306
01:25:16,549 --> 01:25:20,620
j“ this guy's in love with you j“

1307
01:25:23,230 --> 01:25:24,491
j“ yes I'm in love... j“j“

1308
01:25:24,624 --> 01:25:28,361
(Terry) All the members bring their
families and the worst score wins,

1309
01:25:28,495 --> 01:25:30,196
not the best.

1310
01:25:30,797 --> 01:25:34,467
Such is the affection that our members have
towards you and the trophy

1311
01:25:34,567 --> 01:25:36,870
we would like to invite you
and your family over

1312
01:25:37,300 --> 01:25:39,839
for the ten-year anniversary
of the competition.

1313
01:25:40,907 --> 01:25:44,770
Sorry, mr flitcroft said
he's not to be disturbed.

1314
01:25:44,210 --> 01:25:46,112
Oh, all right. Well, uh...

1315
01:25:46,246 --> 01:25:49,282
Just make sure that he gets this,
all right?

1316
01:25:50,250 --> 01:25:51,651
Yeah, of course. Yeah.

1317
01:25:53,486 --> 01:25:56,690
J“ I got to know you cos j“

1318
01:25:57,524 --> 01:26:00,160
j“ I've heard some talk j“

1319
01:26:02,128 --> 01:26:04,330
j“ they say you think... j“j“

1320
01:26:04,464 --> 01:26:08,234
(Terry) We 'd like to offer you
first-class tickets, hotel accommodation

1321
01:26:08,368 --> 01:26:10,704
and as many golf balls
as you can lose.

1322
01:26:11,438 --> 01:26:15,375
We hope you'll accept our invitation
and that you have a pleasant flight.

1323
01:26:15,508 --> 01:26:16,776
Yours, Terry Moore.

1324
01:26:16,910 --> 01:26:19,779
President, blythefie/d country club,
grand rapids, Michigan.

1325
01:26:19,913 --> 01:26:22,449
J“ tell me now j“

1326
01:26:22,582 --> 01:26:24,584
j“isitso? J“

1327
01:26:24,718 --> 01:26:27,587
j“ don't let me be j“

1328
01:26:27,687 --> 01:26:30,123
j“ the last to know j“

1329
01:26:30,256 --> 01:26:31,925
j“ my hands j“

1330
01:26:33,793 --> 01:26:35,328
j“ are shaking j“

1331
01:26:36,696 --> 01:26:38,310
j“ don't let j“

1332
01:26:39,532 --> 01:26:42,235
j“ my heart keep breaking cos j“

1333
01:26:43,670 --> 01:26:44,671
j“ ineed... j“j“

1334
01:26:44,704 --> 01:26:47,240
- Maurice, I'm Terry Moore.
- Oh, hello, Terry.

1335
01:26:47,374 --> 01:26:49,275
So glad you could make it.
Welcome to america.

1336
01:26:49,409 --> 01:26:52,780
Pleased to meet you.
Thanks for having us.

1337
01:26:54,214 --> 01:26:57,384
J“ say you're in love j“

1338
01:26:58,885 --> 01:26:59,853
j“ in love j“

1339
01:27:00,754 --> 01:27:02,989
j“ with this guy j“

1340
01:27:07,160 --> 01:27:09,329
j“ if not, I'll just die... j“j“

1341
01:27:09,462 --> 01:27:12,732
- ah, ah, ah. What you doing?
- We're not finished.

1342
01:27:13,500 --> 01:27:16,870
I thought she was taking it away,
it's almost full. Sorry.

1343
01:27:17,300 --> 01:27:19,706
- (Indistinct)
- (Song continues, instrumental)

1344
01:27:32,419 --> 01:27:33,420
(Song stops)

1345
01:27:33,520 --> 01:27:36,289
Flitcroft, it's showtime.

1346
01:27:36,423 --> 01:27:37,857
Ok, stay calm.

1347
01:27:38,792 --> 01:27:41,661
Ah, to my office please. Thank you.

1348
01:27:42,295 --> 01:27:43,863
Mike. Come on.

1349
01:27:47,467 --> 01:27:48,668
(Quietly) Mike.

1350
01:27:55,875 --> 01:27:59,145
(****) 'Finally, the moment
we've all been waiting for.'

1351
01:27:59,279 --> 01:28:01,748
'Maurice flitcroft will tee off

1352
01:28:01,881 --> 01:28:04,751
at his own tournament
here at grand rapids.'

1353
01:28:09,923 --> 01:28:12,425
(Crowd cheering)

1354
01:28:16,796 --> 01:28:18,365
(Quiet applause)

1355
01:28:19,733 --> 01:28:23,690
Thank you, mr flitcroft.
You've given us much to think about.

1356
01:28:23,203 --> 01:28:24,871
Excuse us a moment.

1357
01:28:32,579 --> 01:28:36,583
Excuse me, mr flitcroft.
We have just one question more.

1358
01:28:36,716 --> 01:28:38,251
We were just wondering,

1359
01:28:38,385 --> 01:28:41,788
are you related by any chance
to Maurice flitcroft?

1360
01:28:41,921 --> 01:28:43,289
The crazy golfer?

1361
01:28:44,758 --> 01:28:46,426
No, no, no, no, no!

1362
01:28:47,193 --> 01:28:50,497
That's a really common name
round these parts.

1363
01:28:50,630 --> 01:28:54,667
He has nothing to do with Michael.
He's a different class of person.

1364
01:29:00,440 --> 01:29:02,242
Yes. I am.

1365
01:29:03,710 --> 01:29:04,978
He's my father.

1366
01:29:05,645 --> 01:29:07,781
Maurice flitcroft is my dad.

1367
01:29:09,649 --> 01:29:11,584
(Slow instrumental music)

1368
01:29:15,822 --> 01:29:19,859
- An honour to meet you.
- We are big fan of your father.

1369
01:29:19,993 --> 01:29:22,896
He's the only golfer
who is worse than my boss!

1370
01:29:25,498 --> 01:29:28,234
Yeah! We're all big fans
of Maurice round here.

1371
01:29:28,368 --> 01:29:31,171
He used to work here,
don't you know? Eh?

1372
01:29:31,271 --> 01:29:35,241
(Akira) Can we meet your father?
(Kenji) Would he play golf with us?

1373
01:29:35,375 --> 01:29:37,711
Yeah, I think he'd like that a lot.

1374
01:29:37,811 --> 01:29:39,446
(Laughter)

1375
01:29:42,148 --> 01:29:44,150
'What a great opening drive.'

1376
01:29:44,284 --> 01:29:47,120
'two twenty yards,
straight down the middle.'

1377
01:29:47,253 --> 01:29:49,823
'have they got
the real Maurice flitcroft?'

1378
01:29:52,292 --> 01:29:53,293
'whoa!'

1379
01:29:53,426 --> 01:29:54,527
(Maurice) 'Sorry!'

1380
01:29:56,563 --> 01:29:58,331
'oh, I think that's him.'

1381
01:29:59,733 --> 01:30:00,834
'you ok?'

1382
01:30:01,568 --> 01:30:03,603
j“ you could set me free

1383
01:30:03,737 --> 01:30:05,772
j“ come on, set me free

1384
01:30:06,439 --> 01:30:09,576
j“ we could dance
'neath the pale moonlight

1385
01:30:09,709 --> 01:30:11,578
j“ feeling good tonight

1386
01:30:11,711 --> 01:30:14,547
j“ feeling good tonight... j“

1387
01:30:29,863 --> 01:30:33,330
- We're staying here, brother.
- Read my mind, mate.

1388
01:30:33,533 --> 01:30:35,468
J“ some satisfaction

1389
01:30:35,568 --> 01:30:37,737
j“ is what I've been searching for

1390
01:30:37,871 --> 01:30:39,506
j“ got to find myself a... j“

1391
01:30:39,606 --> 01:30:40,607
great dancers.

1392
01:30:44,440 --> 01:30:46,546
'I'd just thrown away
the junior club championship

1393
01:30:46,646 --> 01:30:49,215
with a three putt from 15 feet.'

1394
01:30:49,315 --> 01:30:53,853
'i went home and I said to my dad:
"That's it, I'm giving up golf".'

1395
01:30:53,987 --> 01:30:56,656
'i went to my room,
switched on the TV

1396
01:30:56,790 --> 01:31:00,994
and saw Maurice flitcroft
hit four putts from ten feet.'

1397
01:31:01,127 --> 01:31:04,531
'i went downstairs and said to my dad:
"Maybe it wasn't so bad".'

1398
01:31:04,664 --> 01:31:05,665
(laughter)

1399
01:31:06,466 --> 01:31:09,936
'Next year I'll be playing
at the us masters in Augusta

1400
01:31:10,700 --> 01:31:12,939
for winning
the us amateur championship.'

1401
01:31:13,740 --> 01:31:17,344
'ladies and gentlemen,
I give you, Maurice flitcroft.'

1402
01:31:17,944 --> 01:31:20,113
(rousing instrumental music)

1403
01:31:44,604 --> 01:31:47,700
"Practice is the road
to perfection".

1404
01:31:47,907 --> 01:31:49,776
(Applause)

1405
01:31:50,944 --> 01:31:52,545
- Wonderful speech.
- Thank you.

1406
01:31:59,252 --> 01:32:00,320
(Clears throat)

1407
01:32:02,188 --> 01:32:03,523
'So, mm...'

1408
01:32:04,257 --> 01:32:05,291
'uh...'

1409
01:32:06,159 --> 01:32:08,962
'go... golf is a game

1410
01:32:09,729 --> 01:32:12,799
where you can play well
and score poorly

1411
01:32:12,899 --> 01:32:15,368
or play poorly and score well.'

1412
01:32:15,835 --> 01:32:19,500
'but... but my game
was never like that.'

1413
01:32:19,506 --> 01:32:21,700
'uh... I...'

1414
01:32:21,107 --> 01:32:24,377
'i played poorly
and I scored poorly as well.'

1415
01:32:26,312 --> 01:32:28,715
'but, uh,
if I can inspire just one person,

1416
01:32:28,815 --> 01:32:32,652
like this very talented young man,
that's a hole in one, isn't it?'

1417
01:32:32,786 --> 01:32:36,256
'that makes the whole thing worthwhile.
Good luck to you.'

1418
01:32:37,757 --> 01:32:39,259
'and keep practising.'

1419
01:32:40,527 --> 01:32:41,661
'good luck to you.'

1420
01:32:46,833 --> 01:32:48,868
(Slow melancholic music)

1421
01:33:01,810 --> 01:33:02,615
'Uh, so...'

1422
01:33:03,650 --> 01:33:05,485
'uh, thank you.'

1423
01:33:06,586 --> 01:33:08,655
'I'd like to thank, uh, Terry...

1424
01:33:08,788 --> 01:33:11,191
Terry Moore
and all the members of the club

1425
01:33:11,324 --> 01:33:13,860
paying an enormous
amount of money, I expect,

1426
01:33:13,993 --> 01:33:16,863
to bring Jean and I
and the family over here,

1427
01:33:16,996 --> 01:33:18,198
uh, for this week.'

1428
01:33:18,331 --> 01:33:21,668
'but whatever you paid,
the airline lost all our luggage,

1429
01:33:21,801 --> 01:33:25,205
so thanks for the clothes as well.'

1430
01:33:25,338 --> 01:33:27,207
(laughter)

1431
01:33:27,340 --> 01:33:31,440
'Well, there's so many people
I want to thank while I'm up here.'

1432
01:33:31,177 --> 01:33:34,981
'uh, I'd like to thank me sons,
James and gene,

1433
01:33:35,115 --> 01:33:37,584
the fantastic flitcrofts,

1434
01:33:37,717 --> 01:33:40,787
who you saw dancing on the floor
a little while ago.'

1435
01:33:40,920 --> 01:33:44,240
'and, uh,
I'd like to thank me son, Mike.'

1436
01:33:44,157 --> 01:33:47,494
'and, uh, I'd like to thank,
uh, Lloyd Donovan

1437
01:33:47,961 --> 01:33:51,698
uh, a journalist who's been
documenting me ups and downs.'

1438
01:33:51,831 --> 01:33:56,503
'but there's one person that, uh,
that I've never thanked publicly.'

1439
01:33:57,670 --> 01:34:02,676
'actually, I don't think I've ever
even thanked her, uh, privately.'

1440
01:34:02,776 --> 01:34:06,746
'uh, so tonight, I'd very much
like to thank me wife, Jean.'

1441
01:34:09,949 --> 01:34:12,218
'if life were a cup of tea,

1442
01:34:12,852 --> 01:34:14,754
my Jean is the sugar.'

1443
01:34:15,321 --> 01:34:17,957
'without it, it's unbearable,
Chuck it away.'

1444
01:34:18,910 --> 01:34:20,360
'but with it, it's like...

1445
01:34:20,493 --> 01:34:22,729
It's like heaven on earth.'

1446
01:34:23,329 --> 01:34:25,632
'she... she's a magician.'

1447
01:34:25,732 --> 01:34:28,168
'she is. She's a magician.'

1448
01:34:28,301 --> 01:34:30,370
'she's the light of me life

1449
01:34:30,503 --> 01:34:33,907
and I don't know
how I'd cope without her.'

1450
01:34:34,400 --> 01:34:35,675
(quiet instrumental music)

1451
01:34:35,775 --> 01:34:37,610
'I love her very, very much.'

1452
01:34:37,744 --> 01:34:39,446
(crowd) Aww...

1453
01:34:45,485 --> 01:34:46,920
'To Jean.'

1454
01:34:47,200 --> 01:34:49,289
(all) To Jean!

1455
01:34:49,422 --> 01:34:51,240
(Music building)

1456
01:34:55,562 --> 01:34:57,464
(Whistle cheers)

1457
01:35:24,457 --> 01:35:26,593
- (Indistinct)
- (Music continues)

1458
01:35:35,902 --> 01:35:37,370
- Ta, dad.
- Ta.

1459
01:35:37,504 --> 01:35:39,205
That's caviar, there.

1460
01:35:41,700 --> 01:35:42,800
Maurice.

1461
01:35:42,575 --> 01:35:44,544
- Champagne and caviar.
- Yeah.

1462
01:35:44,678 --> 01:35:45,879
Travel the world.

1463
01:35:45,979 --> 01:35:49,916
- Yeah, travel the world. Like I said.
- Just like you promised.

1464
01:35:50,500 --> 01:35:52,986
Shame about the diamonds.
I'll forgive you that.

1465
01:35:53,119 --> 01:35:55,955
Shame. Wait a minute, me heart.

1466
01:35:56,890 --> 01:35:59,292
Oh, Jean, it's rattling some.
Me old heart.

1467
01:36:00,427 --> 01:36:02,228
Well, what's that?

1468
01:36:02,362 --> 01:36:03,730
What've you done?

1469
01:36:04,964 --> 01:36:07,534
- Oh, Maurice.
- It's come right out of me heart.

1470
01:36:14,574 --> 01:36:16,176
Where'd you get that?

1471
01:36:17,410 --> 01:36:20,246
Cliff sent it me
from his mate down the market.

1472
01:36:20,714 --> 01:36:23,817
So, maybe don't wear it in public.

1473
01:36:24,384 --> 01:36:26,453
It's beautiful, thank you.

1474
01:36:30,490 --> 01:36:33,293
- I meant it.
- I know. Thank you.

1475
01:36:45,572 --> 01:36:47,374
(****) 80, Maurice.

1476
01:36:47,841 --> 01:36:51,440
Any more goals
as far as golf is concerned?

1477
01:36:51,177 --> 01:36:55,148
Oh. Well, maybe
sports personality of the year.

1478
01:36:55,915 --> 01:37:00,687
I'm surprised I haven't been nominated.
There's a conspiracy against me.

1479
01:37:01,521 --> 01:37:03,990
- It's kind of not fair, is it?
- No, it's sport.

1480
01:37:04,124 --> 01:37:06,259
It's all about sport, isn't it?

1481
01:37:06,359 --> 01:37:10,663
I mean, for every winner
of a tournament there's a 149 losers.

1482
01:37:10,797 --> 01:37:12,832
(**** chuckles)

1483
01:37:12,966 --> 01:37:15,201
Wonderful way
to leave the interview.

1484
01:37:15,335 --> 01:37:16,403
Thanks.

1485
01:37:17,904 --> 01:37:19,439
Maurice flitcroft.

1486
01:37:19,572 --> 01:37:21,875
The phantom of the open.

1487
01:37:22,800 --> 01:37:23,743
- Thank you.
- Thank you.

1488
01:37:29,820 --> 01:37:30,830
And cut.

1489
01:37:30,784 --> 01:37:32,318
Thank you, Maurice.

1490
01:37:32,452 --> 01:37:34,120
Will I get my tea now?

1491
01:37:34,254 --> 01:37:37,791
Oh, my gosh, I forgot.
Can someone get Maurice his tea?

1492
01:37:37,924 --> 01:37:40,660
- Uh, was it six sugars? — six.

1493
01:37:41,461 --> 01:37:46,366
A lot of pros here in the states get
invited to play in the open and don't go.

1494
01:37:47,330 --> 01:37:48,340
Why not?

1495
01:37:48,635 --> 01:37:52,380
Well, uh, it's a long way,
it's expensive...

1496
01:37:53,206 --> 01:37:56,209
I got a buddy who's a pro
in frenchman's creek, Florida,

1497
01:37:56,343 --> 01:37:59,946
and he's not going because
he doesn't like the weather in Scotland.

1498
01:38:00,800 --> 01:38:01,581
Can you believe that?

1499
01:38:01,715 --> 01:38:03,283
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.

1500
01:38:05,118 --> 01:38:06,286
What's his name?

1501
01:38:06,920 --> 01:38:09,789
(J“ the soul children:
"Put your world in my world" j“)

1502
01:38:17,300 --> 01:38:19,632
J“ everybody got a world j“

1503
01:38:20,834 --> 01:38:22,802
j“ they're living in, girl j“

1504
01:38:24,700 --> 01:38:27,700
j“ I wanna take you j“

1505
01:38:27,107 --> 01:38:28,742
j“ I know I can't make you... j“j“

1506
01:38:28,875 --> 01:38:32,879
(Tony) 'Welcome to the first round
of qualifying for the British open.'

1507
01:38:32,979 --> 01:38:36,820
'we got players here
from all round the world.'

1508
01:38:36,216 --> 01:38:38,251
'they've got Japanese, Australians.'

1509
01:38:38,385 --> 01:38:41,121
'players from France,
Germany, Spain, you name it.

1510
01:38:41,254 --> 01:38:43,690
'A very smooth looking
American there.'

1511
01:38:44,624 --> 01:38:47,193
j“ put your world in my world j“

1512
01:38:47,961 --> 01:38:50,497
j“ put your plans in my plans j“

1513
01:38:51,197 --> 01:38:55,735
j“ we can be together, baby
we're the best of two worlds... j“j“

1514
01:38:56,503 --> 01:38:58,571
'the course is looking spectacular.'

1515
01:38:58,705 --> 01:39:00,907
'so, without further ado,

1516
01:39:01,410 --> 01:39:02,942
let's get out on the course.'

1517
01:39:04,210 --> 01:39:05,745
'ladies and gentlemen,

1518
01:39:06,579 --> 01:39:08,815
please welcome on the tee,

1519
01:39:08,948 --> 01:39:11,818
from frenchman's creek, Florida,

1520
01:39:11,951 --> 01:39:14,120
gene pachecki.'

1521
01:39:15,989 --> 01:39:17,957
j“ so, it stands to reason j“

1522
01:39:19,125 --> 01:39:21,227
j“ people fussin' all the time j“

1523
01:39:22,462 --> 01:39:24,464
j“ just take my hand... j“j“

1524
01:39:24,564 --> 01:39:25,565
come on.

1525
01:39:25,699 --> 01:39:27,967
J“ I know you understand j“

1526
01:39:28,902 --> 01:39:31,204
j“ that you gonna be my woman j“

1527
01:39:31,738 --> 01:39:33,740
j“ baby
I'm so gonna be your man... j“j“

1528
01:39:33,873 --> 01:39:35,742
isn't that Maurice flitcroft?

1529
01:39:35,875 --> 01:39:36,876
J“ yeah j“

1530
01:39:36,910 --> 01:39:39,979
j“ all you've got to do for me is j“

1531
01:39:40,113 --> 01:39:43,450
j“ put your world in my world, oh j“

1532
01:39:43,583 --> 01:39:46,119
j“ put your plans in my plans j“

1533
01:39:46,820 --> 01:39:50,857
j“ we can be together, baby
we 're the best of two worlds j“

1534
01:39:53,793 --> 01:39:55,328
j“aw, awj“

1535
01:39:55,895 --> 01:39:58,732
j“ ooh, ooh, ooh j“

1536
01:40:03,570 --> 01:40:06,706
j“ girl, you've got my soul j“

1537
01:40:06,840 --> 01:40:09,109
j“ can I have your mind? J“

1538
01:40:09,242 --> 01:40:11,211
j“ oh, baby, look here j“

1539
01:40:11,311 --> 01:40:13,947
j“ but you can make
my whole world better j“

1540
01:40:14,800 --> 01:40:17,283
j“ just put your world in my world j“

1541
01:40:18,118 --> 01:40:20,854
j“ put your plans in my plans j“

1542
01:40:21,454 --> 01:40:25,125
j“ we can be together, baby... j“j“
(Song stops)

1543
01:40:26,259 --> 01:40:27,861
(Newsreader) 'B/ythefield country club

1544
01:40:27,994 --> 01:40:32,650
is in the midst of it's tenth annual
flitcroft member-guest golf tournament. '

1545
01:40:32,198 --> 01:40:34,200
'an event named
after Maurice flitcroft.'

1546
01:40:34,334 --> 01:40:37,370
'Maurice flitcroft,
a crane driver from barrow.'

1547
01:40:37,170 --> 01:40:41,708
(****) 'Do you wanna go on?
Are you looking maybe at the hall of fame?'

1548
01:40:41,841 --> 01:40:45,779
'the hall of fame, back home,
maybe, uh, sportsman of the year.'

1549
01:40:45,912 --> 01:40:49,549
'I'm surprised I've not been invited
or nominated for that:

1550
01:40:49,649 --> 01:40:51,718
Sports personality of the year.'

1551
01:40:51,818 --> 01:40:54,870
'there's something going on.'

1552
01:40:54,187 --> 01:40:56,856
'there's a conspiracy
being waged against me.'

1553
01:40:56,990 --> 01:40:58,825
(j' Jimmy James: "A man like me" j“)

1554
01:40:58,958 --> 01:41:02,729
J“ I won't spend my life
on a shelf j“

1555
01:41:02,862 --> 01:41:04,664
j“ I need you, my baby j“

1556
01:41:04,798 --> 01:41:06,633
j“ and nobody else... j“j“

1557
01:41:07,133 --> 01:41:09,536
'to explain to those
who don't know about golf.'

1558
01:41:09,669 --> 01:41:12,739
'you're gonna putt
as if you were on a green.'

1559
01:41:12,872 --> 01:41:16,443
'you're gonna aim for this thing.
Quite dramatic, isn't it?'

1560
01:41:19,746 --> 01:41:21,581
(Tom) 'Oh, that was a nearly.'

1561
01:41:21,715 --> 01:41:24,984
(Anne) 'A lot of pressure.
You shouldn't speak.'

1562
01:41:25,118 --> 01:41:28,788
(Tom) 'You need a few shots
to get used to the pace of the green.'

1563
01:41:31,257 --> 01:41:34,561
- 'this is not going too well, is it?'
- 'This floor's sloping.'

1564
01:41:36,620 --> 01:41:37,397
(song continues)

1565
01:41:50,410 --> 01:41:51,945
(****) 'A man of your stature,

1566
01:41:52,780 --> 01:41:55,582
and your competence
on a golf course,

1567
01:41:55,715 --> 01:41:59,986
we can't leave without
some tips for golfers like myself.'

1568
01:42:00,120 --> 01:42:02,122
'person picking up a golf club
for the first time,

1569
01:42:02,255 --> 01:42:04,240
what would be your advice?'

1570
01:42:05,425 --> 01:42:07,270
'my advice, well...'

1571
01:42:08,528 --> 01:42:09,829
'um...

1572
01:42:09,963 --> 01:42:10,964
'Practice.'

1573
01:42:11,564 --> 01:42:14,567
'that is the road to perfection.
Regular practice.'

1574
01:42:15,402 --> 01:42:16,770
(song continues)

1575
01:42:26,212 --> 01:42:27,213
(Song stops)