1 00:00:02,369 --> 00:00:03,903 ADULT SHELDON: I never cared for The Game of Life. 2 00:00:03,903 --> 00:00:06,272 (kids shouting) 3 00:00:06,272 --> 00:00:08,875 Marriage, children, careers, houses. 4 00:00:08,875 --> 00:00:11,440 What kind of life is that? 5 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:13,446 In my game, the milestones are... 6 00:00:13,446 --> 00:00:15,782 papers published, degrees earned, 7 00:00:15,782 --> 00:00:17,384 Nobel Prizes won. 8 00:00:17,384 --> 00:00:19,519 And in my version, I am dominating. 9 00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:20,754 But you knew that. 10 00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:22,622 Ooh, and instead of cars, 11 00:00:22,622 --> 00:00:24,157 you'd ride around in a train. (train whistle blows) 12 00:00:24,157 --> 00:00:25,992 Honestly, why aren't they making this? 13 00:00:25,992 --> 00:00:27,627 Yes! Hello, Sam. 14 00:00:27,627 --> 00:00:29,950 You seem agitated. 15 00:00:29,950 --> 00:00:31,598 I just got accepted into my summer program. 16 00:00:31,598 --> 00:00:33,900 Oh, summer school. I didn't realize you were struggling. 17 00:00:33,900 --> 00:00:35,301 But way to not give up. 18 00:00:35,301 --> 00:00:36,269 No. 19 00:00:36,269 --> 00:00:37,470 It's at Columbia. 20 00:00:37,470 --> 00:00:39,500 This is gonna look really good 21 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:40,106 on my grad school application. 22 00:00:40,106 --> 00:00:40,707 Grad school? 23 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,308 Those applications are a year away. 24 00:00:42,308 --> 00:00:43,677 You have to start early. 25 00:00:43,677 --> 00:00:45,245 It's so competitive these days. 26 00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:46,713 I think I'll be fine. 27 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,810 Where are you hoping to go? 28 00:00:48,810 --> 00:00:49,582 Caltech. Sheldon, 29 00:00:49,582 --> 00:00:51,840 that's one of the toughest programs 30 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:52,318 to get into in the world. 31 00:00:52,318 --> 00:00:54,870 I know, they deserve the best. 32 00:00:54,870 --> 00:00:55,155 Well, if I were you, I would start 33 00:00:55,155 --> 00:00:56,356 building up my résumé now. 34 00:00:56,356 --> 00:00:57,924 Uh, my résumé's pretty good. 35 00:00:57,924 --> 00:00:59,759 4.0, child prodigy. 36 00:00:59,759 --> 00:01:01,194 Beloved wherever I go. 37 00:01:01,194 --> 00:01:03,329 Are you on any published papers? 38 00:01:03,329 --> 00:01:04,698 No. 39 00:01:04,698 --> 00:01:05,932 Have you presented at any conferences? 40 00:01:05,932 --> 00:01:06,766 No. 41 00:01:06,766 --> 00:01:09,502 Have you been involved in any outside projects? 42 00:01:09,502 --> 00:01:11,838 I did develop a grant research database. 43 00:01:11,838 --> 00:01:13,390 Oh, well that's something. 44 00:01:13,390 --> 00:01:14,874 It failed spectacularly. 45 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:17,110 Well, hey... 46 00:01:17,110 --> 00:01:18,545 at least you're beloved. 47 00:01:19,846 --> 00:01:21,915 (train whistle blows) 48 00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:27,721 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 49 00:01:27,721 --> 00:01:30,357 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 50 00:01:30,357 --> 00:01:32,792 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 51 00:01:32,792 --> 00:01:35,929 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 52 00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:39,766 ♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪ 53 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,637 CHIP: Now I hope y'all enjoyed those sunny skies. 54 00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:47,240 Because we have some weather headed our way... 55 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,408 Want some? 56 00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:49,743 No, I'm good. 57 00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:51,244 You sure? 58 00:01:51,244 --> 00:01:52,612 Yeah, I slept almost four hours last night. 59 00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:53,713 I feel like a tiger. 60 00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:54,881 Good for you. 61 00:01:54,881 --> 00:01:56,750 Brushed my hair, I brushed my teeth, 62 00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:58,318 I may even go outside today. 63 00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:01,321 Wow, an 80% chance of rain. Never mind. 64 00:02:01,321 --> 00:02:03,456 Probably from all these clouds over here... 65 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:04,958 MEEMAW: Who is this guy? 66 00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:07,761 Where's perky Heather with today's weather? 67 00:02:07,761 --> 00:02:10,300 I don't know, I think the sports guy's filling in. 68 00:02:10,300 --> 00:02:12,399 This storm is just gonna make a full-court press. 69 00:02:12,399 --> 00:02:14,801 And just run right on past Houston, 70 00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,302 right on past Lufkin, 71 00:02:16,302 --> 00:02:18,400 all the way over to Medford over here... 72 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,173 He ain't even pointin' at Medford. 73 00:02:20,173 --> 00:02:21,675 That's a drive that Jack Nicklaus 74 00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:23,176 would be proud of right there. 75 00:02:23,176 --> 00:02:24,644 I used to do that job, you know. 76 00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,446 It's not as easy as you'd think. 77 00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,848 You got to look forward, but point backward 78 00:02:28,848 --> 00:02:30,483 while reading the script. 79 00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:32,485 All with sunshine in your voice. 80 00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:34,587 I could actually hear the sunshine in your voice. 81 00:02:34,587 --> 00:02:35,922 Thanks. 82 00:02:35,922 --> 00:02:37,123 (CeeCee crying) 83 00:02:37,123 --> 00:02:39,459 Now back to CeeCee in the nursery 84 00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:41,161 with screaming. (groans) 85 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,629 CHIP: And that's the weather. 86 00:02:44,864 --> 00:02:45,965 You're late. 87 00:02:45,965 --> 00:02:47,634 Sorry, I ran into Sam. 88 00:02:47,634 --> 00:02:49,636 Bright girl. She's going places. 89 00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:52,380 Specifically the physics department at Columbia. 90 00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:54,400 Oh, she got in, fantastic. Mm-hmm. 91 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:55,875 I know she was hoping to spice up 92 00:02:55,875 --> 00:02:57,277 her applications. 93 00:02:57,277 --> 00:02:59,120 Well, I like to think that I'm all the spice 94 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:00,613 my applications will need. 95 00:03:00,613 --> 00:03:01,648 You're not. 96 00:03:01,648 --> 00:03:03,116 What are you saying? 97 00:03:03,116 --> 00:03:04,851 Actually, uh... 98 00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:06,486 Hold on, should I be trying to beef up 99 00:03:06,486 --> 00:03:07,787 my grad school applications? 100 00:03:07,787 --> 00:03:09,823 The competition is fierce. 101 00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,391 It takes a lot to stand out. 102 00:03:11,391 --> 00:03:13,293 You're my advisors, why didn't you 103 00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:14,661 advise me of this? 104 00:03:14,661 --> 00:03:17,564 Sheldon, if I could offer you some advice... 105 00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:19,566 No thank you. 106 00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:21,468 Sheldon, I have a recommendation for you. 107 00:03:21,468 --> 00:03:22,535 I have one for you. 108 00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:23,636 Trim your nose hair. 109 00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:25,872 Do you remember that? 110 00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:28,308 I do. It looked like a spider was living up there. 111 00:03:32,450 --> 00:03:33,246 Hey. 112 00:03:33,246 --> 00:03:34,881 Hey. What are you doing here? 113 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:37,384 Oh, just looking through some of my old videotapes. 114 00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:38,885 Oh, cool. 115 00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:40,920 Wait, you didn't find any of my tapes, did you? 116 00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,230 What are your tapes? 117 00:03:43,230 --> 00:03:44,991 Nothing. 118 00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:47,227 Well, mine are from when I was a weather girl. 119 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,529 Whatcha need 'em for? 120 00:03:49,529 --> 00:03:50,730 Well, the local station's looking. 121 00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:51,898 I'm gonna apply. 122 00:03:52,866 --> 00:03:54,367 But you're a mom now. 123 00:03:55,435 --> 00:03:56,936 Yeah, so? 124 00:03:56,936 --> 00:03:58,538 Well, I'm just sayin' don't you kind of have 125 00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,600 your hands full with CeeCee? 126 00:04:01,740 --> 00:04:02,942 Well, there's a lot of family around to help. 127 00:04:02,942 --> 00:04:04,277 Well, I know, but... 128 00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:05,845 And I was always gonna go back to work. 129 00:04:05,845 --> 00:04:07,347 If it's about money, 130 00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:08,615 we're good. 131 00:04:08,615 --> 00:04:10,160 You live in a garage. 132 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:11,584 It ain't a garage if there ain't a car in it. 133 00:04:11,584 --> 00:04:13,860 Yeah, it is. 134 00:04:13,860 --> 00:04:14,854 And it's not about money, it's about my life. 135 00:04:14,854 --> 00:04:16,289 I want a career. 136 00:04:16,289 --> 00:04:18,858 Well, I-I happen to think motherhood is a career. 137 00:04:18,858 --> 00:04:21,940 Hmm. What about fatherhood? 138 00:04:21,940 --> 00:04:22,896 You have a job. 139 00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:24,864 That's different. Why? 140 00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:26,399 Because. 141 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:28,301 There's lots of reasons. 142 00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:30,537 Oh, okay, so you just get to have a job and a life, 143 00:04:30,537 --> 00:04:32,205 and I have to stay home with the baby? 144 00:04:32,205 --> 00:04:34,808 Or I have to have a job 145 00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:36,876 and you get to stay home with the baby. 146 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:39,790 It's all about perspective. 147 00:04:40,747 --> 00:04:42,215 SHELDON: Yes, is this 148 00:04:42,215 --> 00:04:44,117 the Columbia summer science honors program? 149 00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,885 Excellent. 150 00:04:45,885 --> 00:04:48,488 My name is Sheldon Cooper, perhaps you've heard of me. 151 00:04:48,488 --> 00:04:50,323 Well, now you have. 152 00:04:50,323 --> 00:04:52,258 Anyways, it's recently come to my attention 153 00:04:52,258 --> 00:04:54,661 that you could be an important step in my career advancement. 154 00:04:54,661 --> 00:04:57,330 So, good news, I'm available. 155 00:04:57,330 --> 00:04:59,599 Yes, I understand I've missed the deadline, 156 00:04:59,599 --> 00:05:01,668 but I'm sure you can make an exception. 157 00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:04,738 But I'm Sheldon Cooper. 158 00:05:11,778 --> 00:05:13,279 And apparently Doctors Linkletter and Sturgis were 159 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:14,781 aware that I already should have been focusing 160 00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:16,820 on my applications. 161 00:05:16,820 --> 00:05:17,951 And they didn't say anything to you? 162 00:05:17,951 --> 00:05:20,587 Well, they did, but I don't come off well in that story. 163 00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:23,156 Shelly, how bad could it be? 164 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,358 You started college when you were 11. 165 00:05:25,358 --> 00:05:27,293 Well, it was impressive when I was little and cute. 166 00:05:27,293 --> 00:05:29,963 But now that I'm old and cute, it's just not the same thing. 167 00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:32,699 Well, just 'cause you look older, 168 00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:34,768 doesn't mean you're any less special. 169 00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,536 Of course. 170 00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:39,105 It's your fault. What? 171 00:05:39,105 --> 00:05:40,707 Well, you've been saying I'm special my whole life, 172 00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:42,308 so now I'm conditioned to expect the world 173 00:05:42,308 --> 00:05:44,377 to cater to me instead of taking initiative. 174 00:05:44,377 --> 00:05:47,113 But you are special, sweetie. 175 00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,949 You just can't turn it off, can you? 176 00:05:51,284 --> 00:05:53,820 (crickets chirping) 177 00:05:55,622 --> 00:05:57,357 She's changed and napping. 178 00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,292 You washed your hands, right? 179 00:06:00,894 --> 00:06:03,329 Shelly, you want some mashed potatoes? 180 00:06:03,329 --> 00:06:04,564 See, there you go again, 181 00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,999 bringing the mashed potatoes to me 182 00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:07,400 when I should be going to the mashed potatoes. 183 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,135 Fine. 184 00:06:09,135 --> 00:06:11,137 What's goin' on? 185 00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:12,806 Years of coddling have made me complacent, 186 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:14,240 and now it may cost me my chance 187 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:15,909 to get into grad school at Caltech. 188 00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:17,644 I've been sayin' that since you were born. 189 00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:20,800 And yet you did nothing to stop her? 190 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:21,881 If it helps, I always thought you sucked. 191 00:06:21,881 --> 00:06:23,183 MARY: Missy. 192 00:06:23,183 --> 00:06:25,510 I talked to Meemaw. She said if you 193 00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:27,854 come back to work at the video store, you can bring the baby. 194 00:06:27,854 --> 00:06:29,856 What? I thought you wanted a job. 195 00:06:29,856 --> 00:06:31,491 No, I said I wanted a career. 196 00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:33,593 Oh, are you thinkin' 197 00:06:33,593 --> 00:06:35,950 about going back to work already? 198 00:06:35,950 --> 00:06:36,663 Yeah. 199 00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:38,365 I mean, it's a little earlier 200 00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:40,233 than I thought, but an opportunity 201 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:41,768 came up and I'm going for it. 202 00:06:41,768 --> 00:06:43,870 See? Initiative. Her parents kicked her out, 203 00:06:43,870 --> 00:06:45,271 and look at that gumption. 204 00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:47,107 So what job you goin' for? 205 00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:49,109 Channel 7's looking for a new weather girl. 206 00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:51,770 Oh, yeah, she said she quit 207 00:06:51,770 --> 00:06:52,712 because she was getting married. 208 00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:55,215 Rumor is she got knocked up. (chuckles) 209 00:06:57,450 --> 00:06:59,119 Which is exciting. 210 00:06:59,119 --> 00:07:01,540 The interview's on Thursday. 211 00:07:01,540 --> 00:07:02,622 What? 212 00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:04,900 You already applied? 213 00:07:04,900 --> 00:07:05,625 I thought we were gonna talk about it. 214 00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,293 We did talk about it. I said I was gonna 215 00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:09,195 send in a tape and then I sent it in. 216 00:07:09,195 --> 00:07:10,864 Who's gonna watch CeeCee? 217 00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:12,565 Well, I was hoping 218 00:07:12,565 --> 00:07:14,134 her family would help out. 219 00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:15,735 Of course. 220 00:07:15,735 --> 00:07:17,137 I mean, I do work. 221 00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,438 I work, too, George. 222 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:19,873 We work. 223 00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:21,207 They got a point. 224 00:07:21,207 --> 00:07:22,575 Uh, is the point 225 00:07:22,575 --> 00:07:24,277 that your mom is a working mother? 226 00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:27,470 Well, I didn't work when my kids were babies. 227 00:07:27,470 --> 00:07:28,915 That's true, she was a stay-at-home coddler. 228 00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:30,817 Okay, now you're being obnoxious. 229 00:07:30,817 --> 00:07:32,819 No one wants to hear you talk, ass face. 230 00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:35,321 Thanks, I appreciate the help, but let's keep it clean. 231 00:07:35,321 --> 00:07:36,589 Butt wad? 232 00:07:36,589 --> 00:07:38,558 Better. 233 00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:46,266 Well, that's a look. 234 00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:50,300 That's also a look. 235 00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:51,905 I can't find anything to wear for my interview. 236 00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:53,773 Well, let's see. 237 00:07:53,773 --> 00:07:55,342 Hmm. 238 00:07:55,342 --> 00:07:57,110 That's pretty cute. 239 00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,678 "Can't find" was code 240 00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:00,800 for "can't fit into." 241 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:01,581 Don't be so hard on yourself, honey. 242 00:08:01,581 --> 00:08:03,183 You just had a baby. 243 00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:04,651 I'll make sure to tell them that. 244 00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:06,353 Apparently everyone loves a working mother. 245 00:08:06,353 --> 00:08:08,355 Is that code for something? 246 00:08:08,355 --> 00:08:10,190 Yeah, your family sucks. 247 00:08:10,190 --> 00:08:12,192 Ooh, sounds like I missed a good dinner. 248 00:08:12,192 --> 00:08:15,161 Am I a bad mom because I want a career? Hell no! 249 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,130 And you're teachin' your daughter that she can grow up 250 00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:19,366 to do something more than raise kids. 251 00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:20,433 Yeah! 252 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:21,501 And you're gonna go in there 253 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,635 and you're gonna get this job. 254 00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:23,536 Yeah! 255 00:08:23,536 --> 00:08:25,138 But not in that. 256 00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:26,806 Yeah. 257 00:08:27,707 --> 00:08:29,442 I'm waitin'. For what? 258 00:08:29,442 --> 00:08:31,478 The "I told you so." 259 00:08:31,478 --> 00:08:33,146 'Cause I coddled 260 00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:35,515 Sheldon and apparently ruined his life. 261 00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:36,983 Oh. 262 00:08:36,983 --> 00:08:38,952 I'm not gonna say that. 263 00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:41,855 I mean, you did coddle him and I did tell ya-- 264 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,289 All right, I told you so. 265 00:08:43,289 --> 00:08:45,250 Thanks for not sayin' it. 266 00:08:45,250 --> 00:08:47,127 Well, what does he know? 267 00:08:47,127 --> 00:08:48,728 He's just a dumb teenager. 268 00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:51,640 I guess it is normal for teenagers 269 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,199 to blame their parents for stuff. 270 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,501 Sheldon's normal. 271 00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:55,735 That's a shocker. 272 00:08:55,735 --> 00:08:57,904 Great, the one normal thing he does 273 00:08:57,904 --> 00:08:59,739 is blame me. (chuckles) Someday 274 00:08:59,739 --> 00:09:02,409 his kids are gonna tell him he's ruinin' their lives. 275 00:09:02,409 --> 00:09:03,643 You think? 276 00:09:03,643 --> 00:09:05,712 If he has 'em, they're gonna say it. 277 00:09:06,646 --> 00:09:08,848 So probably not. 278 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:10,750 ADULT SHELDON: Joke's on him. 279 00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,385 I did have kids. 280 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:13,853 And joke's on me. 281 00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:16,690 They say it all the time. 282 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:20,760 (door opens) 283 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:22,996 Good morning. 284 00:09:22,996 --> 00:09:24,864 Oh, you're out and about early. 285 00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:26,566 Yeah, got a lot going on today. 286 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:28,735 Connie's taking me out shopping and then to the salon 287 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:30,503 to get ready for my interview. Nice. 288 00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:32,105 A little mommy-daughter day? 289 00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:34,207 Daddy-daughter day. Here ya go. 290 00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:35,875 I have work. 291 00:09:35,875 --> 00:09:38,445 Well, I like to think fatherhood is a full-time job. 292 00:09:38,445 --> 00:09:39,879 How am I gonna feed her? 293 00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:42,215 I don't have the... you know. 294 00:09:42,215 --> 00:09:43,717 Formula's in the bag. 295 00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:45,180 Tag, you're it. 296 00:09:45,180 --> 00:09:46,619 Bye, CeeCee. 297 00:09:46,619 --> 00:09:48,455 (door closes) 298 00:09:48,455 --> 00:09:51,224 Well, looks like it's just me and you. 299 00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,293 Let me give you the tour. 300 00:09:53,293 --> 00:09:55,628 That's Axl Rose. 301 00:09:55,628 --> 00:09:57,464 He's awesome. 302 00:09:57,464 --> 00:09:58,765 That's the weight bench. 303 00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,734 That's where Daddy gets ripped. 304 00:10:00,734 --> 00:10:02,802 Yeah. And that's the sink 305 00:10:02,802 --> 00:10:04,637 your mom totally peed in once. 306 00:10:04,637 --> 00:10:06,573 It's true. 307 00:10:06,573 --> 00:10:07,907 I know, it's true. 308 00:10:07,907 --> 00:10:10,477 Ooh, Volvo-- safe and flashy. 309 00:10:10,477 --> 00:10:12,212 Like me. Sheldon... 310 00:10:12,212 --> 00:10:13,580 I haven't had my coffee yet. 311 00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:15,715 I thought you might say that. 312 00:10:15,715 --> 00:10:17,984 Thank you. I'm not a coffee drinker. 313 00:10:17,984 --> 00:10:19,552 I hope you like seven sugars. 314 00:10:19,552 --> 00:10:20,887 (coughs) 315 00:10:20,887 --> 00:10:23,123 So what's so important it got you outside? 316 00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,291 I had an idea that I think might be beneficial 317 00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:27,600 to both the university and me. 318 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:28,962 An exclusive summer program led 319 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,964 by a prestigious scientist of my choosing. 320 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,665 I've got an idea. 321 00:10:32,665 --> 00:10:34,768 Apply to a school that already has it, 322 00:10:34,768 --> 00:10:36,690 get in, and go there. 323 00:10:36,690 --> 00:10:37,637 Well, to be honest, 324 00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:39,606 with my current résumé, I may not get in anywhere, 325 00:10:39,606 --> 00:10:41,675 which is why we need a program like this. 326 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:44,411 Sheldon, we don't have the time or the resources 327 00:10:44,411 --> 00:10:47,130 to create a brand-new summer program. 328 00:10:47,130 --> 00:10:48,982 Oh, that's just sleepy talk. Take a few more sips, 329 00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,450 let that sugar kick in. 330 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,752 The answer is no. 331 00:10:54,870 --> 00:10:56,623 I knew I should have put whiskey in that coffee. 332 00:10:58,124 --> 00:11:00,994 (games dinging) 333 00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,328 Whose baby? 334 00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:03,763 Mine. 335 00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:06,366 And you brought her to a gambling room? 336 00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,702 Why not? There's flashin' lights and fun noises. 337 00:11:08,702 --> 00:11:10,370 It's basically Chuck E. Cheese. 338 00:11:10,370 --> 00:11:12,372 Can I touch her head for luck? 339 00:11:12,372 --> 00:11:13,440 No. 340 00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,842 Come on, I just washed my hands. 341 00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:18,445 Make it quick. 342 00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:21,140 Come on, baby. 343 00:11:21,140 --> 00:11:23,350 Uncle Wade needs a win. 344 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:25,452 All right, that's enough. 345 00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:28,855 (beeping, dinging) 346 00:11:30,156 --> 00:11:32,125 That's what I'm talkin' about! 347 00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:34,994 I told you babies is good luck. 348 00:11:34,994 --> 00:11:37,297 Can I touch her head, too? 349 00:11:37,297 --> 00:11:40,734 All right, no one else is touchin' my baby's head... 350 00:11:40,734 --> 00:11:42,736 for free. 351 00:11:42,736 --> 00:11:44,404 How much? 352 00:11:44,404 --> 00:11:45,905 Five bucks. 353 00:11:45,905 --> 00:11:47,507 Worth it. Sold. 354 00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:57,984 (door slams) MEEMAW: Hey, dummy. 355 00:11:57,984 --> 00:11:59,719 We need to talk. 356 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:02,522 If it's about CeeCee being here, I can explain. 357 00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:04,570 Where is she? 358 00:12:04,570 --> 00:12:05,392 WADE: Right here. 359 00:12:08,610 --> 00:12:09,429 (whispers): Really? 360 00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:10,597 It's fine. 361 00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:11,931 He's got, like, 15 grandkids. 362 00:12:11,931 --> 00:12:14,334 We'll get back to that. 363 00:12:14,334 --> 00:12:16,403 I have spent my day 364 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:19,406 listening to Mandy ***** about you. 365 00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,840 Well, I don't suppose you stuck up for me? 366 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,242 No. 367 00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:24,100 If you really want to be with that girl, 368 00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:26,246 you will not be the one to stand in her way. 369 00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,515 I'm not trying to. 370 00:12:28,515 --> 00:12:31,170 I just want to do what's best for CeeCee. 371 00:12:32,180 --> 00:12:33,219 Obviously. 372 00:12:33,219 --> 00:12:34,888 Don't you think she deserves 373 00:12:34,888 --> 00:12:36,222 a mom who's home with her? 374 00:12:36,222 --> 00:12:38,224 I think she deserves a mom who's happy 375 00:12:38,224 --> 00:12:40,930 and supported by her dad. 376 00:12:41,940 --> 00:12:42,429 Huh. 377 00:12:42,429 --> 00:12:44,631 Why is that woman touchin' her head? 378 00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:45,965 I'll handle it. Hey! 379 00:12:45,965 --> 00:12:48,268 You got to pay for that. 380 00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:53,440 (sighs) Come on, Cooper. 381 00:12:54,974 --> 00:12:56,910 See? He's been here since this morning. 382 00:12:56,910 --> 00:12:58,611 He won't leave. 383 00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,814 What do you want me to do? Get him to leave. 384 00:13:00,814 --> 00:13:02,982 Oh, good, you're both here. 385 00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:04,651 This will go faster with three of us. 386 00:13:04,651 --> 00:13:06,953 Now, do it! Give him the boot. 387 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:08,321 (laughs) 388 00:13:08,321 --> 00:13:10,490 Trying to solve unified field theory? 389 00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:12,225 Yes. Who needs a summer program 390 00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:14,461 if you can solve what Albert Einstein couldn't. 391 00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:16,162 Let's see Caltech say no to this. 392 00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:18,131 Sheldon, you're not gonna solve this 393 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,467 in an afternoon. Or ever. 394 00:13:20,467 --> 00:13:22,200 Well, I need to do something to stand out. 395 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,104 I think you're putting too much pressure 396 00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:25,772 on this summer program. 397 00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,841 You can apply next year. 398 00:13:27,841 --> 00:13:29,242 I can't wait a whole nother year. 399 00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:30,677 I'll fall even further behind. 400 00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:32,412 And then when I'm applying to Columbia, 401 00:13:32,412 --> 00:13:34,314 Sam will be using her letter of recommendation 402 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:36,483 to get into Caltech, and then when I apply to Caltech, 403 00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:38,518 they'll say, "Oh, you're from East Texas Tech, too. 404 00:13:38,518 --> 00:13:40,687 "Well, you must know Sam, she's been here a year longer than you 405 00:13:40,687 --> 00:13:42,422 and you'll never catch up." 406 00:13:43,356 --> 00:13:44,991 I think you need to calm down. 407 00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:46,926 I can't calm down. I have to keep pushing myself 408 00:13:46,926 --> 00:13:48,495 or I'll fall farther and farther behind until I'm a... 409 00:13:48,495 --> 00:13:50,296 aging professor in a small university 410 00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:51,865 with nothing to show for my work. 411 00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:54,100 Ouch, I think he's talking about you. 412 00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:55,869 I think he's talking about us. 413 00:13:55,869 --> 00:13:57,604 No. I'm wasting 414 00:13:57,604 --> 00:13:58,872 too much time sleeping at night. 415 00:13:58,872 --> 00:14:00,607 In fact, where's the coffee machine? 416 00:14:00,607 --> 00:14:02,876 Perhaps it is time I start chasing the caffeine dragon. 417 00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:04,878 Sheldon, listen to us. Why should I? 418 00:14:04,878 --> 00:14:06,346 You let this happen to me. 419 00:14:06,346 --> 00:14:08,114 You failed as my mentors. 420 00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:12,686 What are you doing?! 421 00:14:12,686 --> 00:14:14,387 You're still the student, this is still my office, 422 00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:16,322 and it's time for you to leave. 423 00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:20,126 I'm afraid he's right. 424 00:14:25,732 --> 00:14:26,900 (Mandy gasps) 425 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:29,200 There she is. 426 00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:31,905 Hi! 427 00:14:31,905 --> 00:14:34,541 Um, why does she smell like smoke? 428 00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:36,509 Oh, she hung out with me in the gambling room. 429 00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,110 What? 430 00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:39,846 She was a hit. Everybody said she was good luck. 431 00:14:41,810 --> 00:14:42,816 Okay, so I-I guess it went well? 432 00:14:42,816 --> 00:14:44,384 It did. 433 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,860 So, if you get that job, 434 00:14:46,860 --> 00:14:48,540 I'm all for it. 435 00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:50,557 (CeeCee fussing) 436 00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:51,991 Okay, good. 437 00:14:52,926 --> 00:14:54,494 What's wrong? 438 00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:58,865 Today was the longest I've been away from her, 439 00:14:58,865 --> 00:15:00,667 and it was awful. 440 00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:03,336 So you don't want the job? 441 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:06,439 I-I don't know. 442 00:15:06,439 --> 00:15:08,675 I think you should give it a shot. 443 00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:12,412 Really? Well, you were all excited about it. 444 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:14,381 And if you get the job, you can still say no. 445 00:15:15,615 --> 00:15:17,283 Yeah, that's a good point. 446 00:15:17,283 --> 00:15:19,352 I'd love to see you on TV. 447 00:15:19,352 --> 00:15:21,540 Aw. 448 00:15:21,540 --> 00:15:23,123 Then I can say I slept with that girl on TV. 449 00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:25,250 Okay, well... 450 00:15:27,460 --> 00:15:30,630 ♪ Raindrops are falling on my head ♪ 451 00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:33,600 ♪ And just like the guy ♪ 452 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:37,303 ♪ Whose feet are too big for his bed ♪ 453 00:15:37,303 --> 00:15:39,539 ♪ Nothing seems to fit ♪ (door opens, closes) 454 00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:41,875 ♪ Those raindrops... ♪ 455 00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:43,143 Why are you listening to this? 456 00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:45,545 I was upset, and this was the most angst-filled song 457 00:15:45,545 --> 00:15:47,380 I could find in Mom's record collection. 458 00:15:47,380 --> 00:15:48,648 What's wrong? 459 00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:49,916 These are grown-up problems. 460 00:15:49,916 --> 00:15:51,840 You wouldn't understand. 461 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:52,318 Okay, bye. 462 00:15:52,318 --> 00:15:53,420 I was the youngest student 463 00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:54,888 at the university, and now... 464 00:15:54,888 --> 00:15:56,890 I thought I wouldn't understand your problems. 465 00:15:56,890 --> 00:15:59,826 Well, you're all I've got. 466 00:15:59,826 --> 00:16:01,628 I always assumed 467 00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,396 that I'd be the youngest student in grad school, 468 00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:05,165 and then the youngest person to win the Nobel Prize, 469 00:16:05,165 --> 00:16:06,733 and now it's all slipping away. 470 00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:08,802 No one cares how old you are. 471 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:11,104 Really? You don't think I get treated special 472 00:16:11,104 --> 00:16:12,772 because of my age and intellect? 473 00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:16,242 I guess you do get everything you want all the time. 474 00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:17,277 See? 475 00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,120 And whenever you're obnoxious 476 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:20,680 it's always, "Poor Sheldon, he doesn't know any better." 477 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,582 Exactly. "Poor Sheldon." 478 00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:25,850 At grad school, everybody's going to be smart. 479 00:16:25,850 --> 00:16:26,986 If I'm not the youngest, how am I gonna stand out? 480 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:30,156 Sheldon, you're a kid talking about going to grad school. 481 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:31,691 You have no problems. 482 00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:33,426 I knew you wouldn't understand. 483 00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:35,795 I do-- instead of being a kid genius, 484 00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:37,831 you're worried you're just gonna be a regular genius, 485 00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:40,600 which is a stupid thing for a genius to worry about. 486 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,302 Well, stupid or not, 487 00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:44,637 I may not get to go to Caltech until I'm 15. 488 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:47,107 Wait, this is about when you move out? 489 00:16:47,107 --> 00:16:48,441 Yes. 490 00:16:48,441 --> 00:16:50,944 I take it back, this is a big deal. 491 00:16:50,944 --> 00:16:54,314 ♪ Because I'm free ♪ 492 00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:57,283 ♪ Nothing's worrying me. ♪ 493 00:16:57,283 --> 00:16:58,551 All right. 494 00:16:58,551 --> 00:16:59,652 So, we're just gonna put you on tape 495 00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:01,540 and see how it goes. 496 00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:03,523 Okay. Uh, I'm ready. 497 00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:05,291 Okay. 498 00:17:05,291 --> 00:17:06,326 In three... 499 00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:08,461 (mouthing) 500 00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:12,632 All right, let's take a look at our forecast for tonight. 501 00:17:12,632 --> 00:17:14,801 Winds from the west are headed our way, 502 00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:18,204 taking temperatures down to a cool 43 degrees. 503 00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:19,873 But you know what they say in Texas-- 504 00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:22,409 if you don't like the weather, wait five minutes. 505 00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,144 Actually, I've never said that, 506 00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:25,412 but my Aunt Bonnie does. 507 00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:27,247 She's not wrong though, 508 00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:30,160 because those chilly days are gonna pass us by, 509 00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:33,753 and by the weekend we're looking at sunny and 72. 510 00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:35,422 ADULT SHELDON: Mandy was proving that new mothers 511 00:17:35,422 --> 00:17:37,490 could do anything anyone else could do. 512 00:17:37,490 --> 00:17:39,759 In fact, they could do more, 513 00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:42,495 like make their own milk, 514 00:17:42,495 --> 00:17:44,970 right there, on camera. 515 00:17:44,970 --> 00:17:45,999 Everything okay? 516 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:48,935 Not if you live on the coast, 517 00:17:48,935 --> 00:17:51,504 because there is a storm front building, 518 00:17:51,504 --> 00:17:53,940 so we need to keep an eye on, uh, 519 00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:55,410 these clouds 520 00:17:55,410 --> 00:17:56,609 right here. 521 00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:59,179 Uh, but there's a low-pressure system building, 522 00:17:59,179 --> 00:18:00,780 um, over here, 523 00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:02,248 and, uh, 524 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,170 well, then, that could bring rain to, uh, 525 00:18:04,170 --> 00:18:05,885 to this whole area here. 526 00:18:07,354 --> 00:18:08,688 So, for Channel 7 weather, 527 00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:11,891 I'm Mandy McAllister. Good night. 528 00:18:19,999 --> 00:18:22,135 And I just wanted to say I'm sorry for my behavior. 529 00:18:22,135 --> 00:18:24,137 I realized that I'm going to age out 530 00:18:24,137 --> 00:18:26,306 of being a child prodigy regardless of your help. 531 00:18:26,306 --> 00:18:27,974 I appreciate that. 532 00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:30,977 It takes maturity to admit when you're wrong. 533 00:18:30,977 --> 00:18:33,146 I know, even this apology is grown-up. 534 00:18:33,146 --> 00:18:34,948 Well, this is all a disaster. 535 00:18:34,948 --> 00:18:37,484 Son, it's not. Believe me, no one is more excited 536 00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:39,419 for you to go to grad school than I am. 537 00:18:39,419 --> 00:18:41,421 I don't know, you should talk to my sister. 538 00:18:41,421 --> 00:18:43,323 Anyway, thank you for hearing me out. 539 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,159 Actually, Sheldon, I do have some news. 540 00:18:46,159 --> 00:18:47,761 I reached out to a colleague 541 00:18:47,761 --> 00:18:50,430 who's doing a summer research program 542 00:18:50,430 --> 00:18:52,632 at the University of Heidelberg, 543 00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:54,567 and I think I can get you in. 544 00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:56,403 Heidelberg, Germany? 545 00:18:56,403 --> 00:18:58,571 A summer program 5,000 miles away. 546 00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:00,407 Only a fool would say no to that. 547 00:19:00,407 --> 00:19:02,942 Well, that would certainly help my grad school applications. 548 00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:04,770 STURGIS: Yes, and they're doing 549 00:19:04,770 --> 00:19:06,680 exciting work on superstrings. 550 00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:09,582 Fantastisch. That's German for "fantastic." 551 00:19:09,582 --> 00:19:11,351 Ich helfe dir beim packen. 552 00:19:11,351 --> 00:19:12,919 That's German for "I'll help you pack."